SM owns everything

~EPOV~

I don't even remember how long the flight was all I remember was landing in Seattle and getting into a waiting car. The drive to Harborview seemed to take forever. All my nervous habits were coming back to me full force. My leg wouldn't stop moving, I was humming to myself, my fingers were tapping away at the window, I'm sure I was annoying the shit out of my driver. I didn't give a shit. He finally pulled up to the visitor section of the hospital and I was out the door with my bag.

I made it inside and immediately ran for the elevator, as much as I wanted to see Jasper, Bella was first priority. I hit the button for the floor for labor and delivery. The doors finally opened to the floor and I bolted. I was almost running trying to find a fucking nurses station. Finally.

"I need Bella Cullen's room" I told her trying not to sound clipped. The lady looked up at me and my frantic expression must have told her not to question too much.

"Your name sir?"

"Edward Cullen. She is my wife. I need her room number. NOW!!" My voice getting louder and louder with each word I spoke to her. She was typing in her little computer slowly and it was irritating the hell out of me. I was tapping the counter staring at her. She looked up and huffed and then typed faster. Thank god.

"Room 525 sir" she told me glaring at me. What the fuck bitch. I just turned on my heels and ran in the direction the plaque on the wall told me her room would be. I was jogging down a hallway when I noticed Renee coming out of a room. I stopped short. She looked up and I could see she had been crying. Her eyes were red and swollen. Between Bella the baby and Jasper who was like a son to her. I'm sure she was in hell.

"Sweetie, oh sweetie" she rushed to me and enveloped me in a huge hug. I attached myself to her not realizing how much I just needed to fucking hug someone. I just started crying I couldn't help it. She was rubbing my back and telling me they were fine.

"Sweet boy." She stated looking at me. He hand cupped my cheek. "She needs you in there. I'm going to go check on my grandson then see Jasper. I'll tell everyone that you are here but I'll make sure everyone gives you guys some time alone." I just nodded. She turned to walk away.

"Wait Renee" she turned around.

"Where is Soph?"

"She is with Charlie. He took her back to the house. She doesn't know what's going on. He brings her back every day to see Bells but we didn't know what to tell her about Jasper. He has Jacks too." I just nodded at her. I turned toward Bella's door trying to put myself together before I went in. I needed to be strong for her. I took a big breath and quietly opened her door.

She was lying on her side facing away from the door. Her IV was out and I could tell she was crying by the way her body shook slightly. She must have heard someone enter.

"Mom unless you're here to tell me Edward is on his way, leave me alone please" she spook so quietly. I couldn't take it anymore. I dropped my duffle and walked over to the bed and crawled in beside her. I heard her gasp and turn around in my arms. My girl was broken and there wasn't anything I could do to put her back together.

We just stared at each other tears rolling down each our cheeks. She finally broke and clung to me. Fisting her small hands in my shirt and burying her face in my chest. My arms went around her and held her tightly to me. I didn't hold back I couldn't. I was rocking her, she was mumbling into my chest but I couldn't' make it out, finally I could and I about flew off the handle.

"Bella. Bella look at me now." I waited till she looked up at me. "This was in NO way your fault sweet girl. There is NOTHING to forgive. Baby you did everything right. Ok? EVERYTHING" I told her.

"I know logically it's not my fault baby, but I need someone to blame, someone to be mad at, the guy who pushed me is I don't know where he is but the guy who shot jasper is dead, he was shot by the cops when he started firing at them, but I just need someone to be mad at. Why us baby?" She was sobbing uncontrollable. I didn't know what to say, I didn't have any answers for her, and I mean shit I wondered the same shit.

"I don't know baby. I don't know" it was all I could offer her. We continued to cling to each other, and eventually we both fell asleep.

I woke up slowly, stiff and with a massive headache, I opened my eyes and everything came back to me. I looked down and noticed Bella still asleep and pulled her to me closer. I looked around the room and saw my mom asleep on the chair in the corner.

"Ma" I called quietly trying not to wake Bella. She moved slowly and opened her eyes. She tried to give me a small smile. She made her way to me and kissed my forehead.

"Hey."

"How long have I been out?"

"Umm…about 14 hours or so" I couldn't believe I had slept that long. I carefully made by way off the bed careful not to wake Bella. "She needed the sleep; I don't think she has been sleeping very well." My mom stated into my chest as I hugged her. I needed my mom. She made me feel safe and protected. I pulled away and motioned to the door. She followed me out the room and I closed the door as quietly as I could.

"How is Jasper?"

"They can't remove the bullet until the swelling in his brain goes down, so they went in and placed a tube to help drain the fluid hoping it would help. It is it's just a slow process. Your dad called in a friend from London, he is testing a new drug that we are hoping will help fight the cancer, that we found out he had."

"Ya I knew about that. He contacted me a while ago and told me, he swore me to secrecy ma, and I couldn't betray him" I told her. I knew she was going to be upset I knew. She surprised me though.

"Oh sweetie it's ok. It's not your fault ok" she told me squeezing my hand. I gave her a weak smile.

"How is Al holding up?"

"Not good. She won't leave the room. We haven't brought Jacks up; we don't want him to see his daddy like this. Jasper is hooked up to everything, they had to shave his head, it's not pretty son. She is hopeful though."

"OK. I'm going to head down to the NICU then head over to his room; can you stay with Bella till I get back I don't want her waking up alone?"

"Of course sweetie, Renee and Charlie should be here anytime now with Soph so we will all be here" I just gave her a big held and she held me tight. I pulled away and kissed her cheek before taking off in the direction of my son.

I got to the NICU nursery and just stood there. I didn't know what I wanted to do. I wanted desperately to see my son, but I also didn't know if I could bear seeing him hooked up to all the machines I was sure he was hooked up to. I was also told by Bella before we fell asleep that he only weighed about a pound and a half when he was born. I don't know how long I was standing here before I felt a presence next to me. I didn't acknowledge them I just stood there and stared at the incubator my son was living in. I didn't have a real clear view of him but I could see he had a full head of hair, but my god he was so small.

"He's doing well. He has already gained 3 ounces. It looks worse than it is Edward"

"Ya. It's just hard seeing your child like that" I could feel the tears now. Damn it. I angrily wiped them away.

"Go in and see your son Edward. Hold his hand, talk to him, studies have shown that it helps" I finally turned to my visitor and broke down. I grabbed his white jacket and started sobbing. He pulled me to him and we slid to the ground. My legs couldn't keep me up anymore.

"Dad this is too much. How are we supposed to live without either one of them if they don't make it?"

"I don't know son, but you and Bella will survive. Your son will make it. Alice will be ok and I'm hopeful that Jasper will to. It will be a long and hard road, but we are all here for you guys."

I couldn't get any words out I just sat there and cried into my dad's chest as he hugged me. I felt someone hug me from behind, I could tell by the tiny little arms who it was. I pulled myself together and turned from my father. I grabbed my little girl and held her to me tightly.

"I love you princess. I love you so much." I mumbled into her neck

"I love you too daddy. Brother will be ok, grandpa said so." She told me softly patting my back as she continued to hug me. I looked up and I saw Rose and Emmett. I walked over to them still clutching my little girl, I gave Emmett and hug and then turned to Rose who pulled me tight to her.

"I'm glad your back" she whispered into my ear, I tried to smile back at her but I'm not so sure it came out looking like one.

"Baby why don't you hang out here with your Aunt Rose and Uncle Emmett and go see Mommy Ok?"

"Ok daddy" she told me as I put her down. I looked over at the door I was just standing in front of and walked in. The nurse greeted me with a smile, and then showed me where I could change into some scrubs and wash my hands. I did all she told me to do.

She led me over to the incubator.

"You can touch him and talk to him, just be careful of the tubes." I nodded at her not bothering to look up. As soon as I saw him a smile graced my lips. A fucking real smile. I put my hands through the slots and stroked his tiny cheek.

"Hey buddy" I whispered to him. Sitting down in the chair left there. I moved my hand down to his hand and picked it up gently. He was so fucking small and fragile. "I'm your daddy" I could feel the fucking tears again. God damn it. You would think I was done with the tears but fuck. I started humming and just staring at my little boy. His little head would gradually and slowly move toward the sound of my voice and it gave me hope.

"He knows you, you know?" I whipped my head around to see Bella leaning against the door jamb, she was wearing her robe and I could see the wheel chair just right behind her. I went to get up to help her over when she waved me off. "I need to walk around. Doctor Orders" she smiled softly at me, and walked around to the other side and put her hand in and stroked his face softly.

"I would play your cds that you made me at night sometimes. I wanted them to know your voice. It doesn't surprise me he would know your voice"

"I love you Bells" I didn't know what else to tell her, I couldn't guarantee he was going to be perfect. I couldn't tell her Jasper was fine. I could just reassure her that I was here and I loved her more than anything. We could get through anything as long as we had each other.

"I love you too baby" she told me softly and started humming the same song I was. I softly started singing it.

"I don't wanna waste the weekend,

If you don't love me, pretend

A few more hours, then it's time to go

And as my train rolls down the east coast

I wonder how you keep warm

It's too late to cry, too broken to move on

And still I can't let you be

Most nights I hardly sleep

Don't take what you don't need from me.

It's just a drop in the ocean

A change in the whether

I was praying that you and me might end up together

It's like wishing for rain as I stand in the desert

But I'm holding you closer than most

Cause you are my heaven"

"I remember when you first sang that to me" I looked up and she was looking at me a smile on her lips. A smile I missed.

"Me too." I said as a little chuckle escaped my lips. It was the night she finally agreed to marry me. It only took me 3 times asking her but hey she finally agreed.

"I wanted to say yes the first time, but Jasper talked me out of it. He said 'Now Bells you have only known him 2 weeks give it some time' I'm glad I didn't listen to him for long"

"I'll have to give him hell for that when he gets better" It was the first time we talked about him. I looked down at my son, who was sleeping peacefully. I held on hand and Bella held the other. "I need to make sure him and Ali are doing ok." I told her she just nodded. I walked over to her and kissed her on the back on the neck and I held her. My chest to her back. She leaned back into me.

"Wh…When do you go back?" She asked so quietly.

"Don't know. But I don't care what I have to do, I'm not going back till everyone is better that's for damn sure" I told her.

"Go see Jasper. Tell him I love him"

"Are you going to stay here?"

"Ya just a while longer. It's hard to see him like this. I umm…was looking up the meaning of the names we picked out and I think he should be Ethan, it means he is strong. It fits him I think. Ethan Edward Cullen."

"I love it sweet girl. I'll tell Renee to come in here with you ok?" She nodded at me and I left.

I found Renee in the hallway and told her to go in. I walked back to the elevators and took it down 1 floor to the ICU. I stepped out and could sense all the death and sadness all around me. I turned toward the nurses' station and saw my mom.

"Hey ma" I told her bringing her in for a hug.

"Hey"

"I'm going to go see them"

"Ok, I know she would want you with her" I just nodded and she pointed out the correct door. We were the only family he had, his parents died when he was 22. I walked into the room and my heart broke. Alice was curled around Jaspers side, sleeping. Her eyes were swollen; her tiny hands held japers bigger one. Her head lay on his shoulder. I sighed. Alice's head shot up and looked at me.

I rushed over to her and pulled her to me. She wouldn't let go of Jaspers hand and so I did the best I could holding her.

"Shhhh….Baby sis, this wasn't supposed to happen to him, God not Jas" I whispered to her my tears falling on her head. She didn't say anything she just let me hold her. We had to get through this. Jasper had to make it through this, he just had to. Alice wouldn't make it if he didn't.

"Good new Mrs. Whitlock" The doctor said as he entered the room. I backed up from Alice but still kept my arm around hers. We both looked up at him expectantly. "As soon as your father gets here I'll explain" He told us and I wanted to hit him. You don't come in here tell us you have good new to not tell us. Bastard. Lucky for him my dad walked in only like a minute later.

"Ok so the swelling in his brain has gone down enough for us to remove the bullet, and the new meds your husband is on for the cancer and working. We have him on the schedule for surgery first thing in the morning. We are going to remove the bullet and then we have another team coming in to do a liver transplant since that is where the cancer originated from. I do have to warn you that with any kind of surgery there can be complications, but especially with the brain. If he wakes up he could have amnesia or worse permanent brain damage. I just want you to prepare yourself ok?" Alice just nodded and I could see her close her eyes and small smile left her lips.

-

A/N sorry this is late. I got extremely sick.. I didn't want to leave it here but I wanted to get something out for you guys today. Hope you like it. Review and let me know what you think. Song Edward is singing is called A Drop in the Ocean by Ron Pope. Very great song.

Fic Recs this week

Late Night Encounters by Kyla713 – Edward and Bella meet on a chat site and things go from there. She lives in Cali and him in Chicago.

Finding Home by Jennde – this is a continuation of her age of Edward on shot called infamy. Edward and Bella grew up together in Hawaii. Set during WW2.