The unusual gang set out from the human camp just before noon. Diego led the way, followed by Manfred. Sid got to hold Roshan, while Jack Sparrow and Will Turner lagged behind.

For a while after they left, Will kept glancing at Jack Sparrow, then quickly averting his gaze. 'He must've known my father.' The thought continued to fill his mind. William so wanted to say something, but couldn't find the right words to say. He hated this. Awkward silences are so annoying.

After a while, however, the awkward silence was no longer a silence. It was filled with a constant wailing. Roshan the baby was crying.

"WAAAAAAAH! WAAAAAAAH! WAAAAAAAH!"

Half an hour passed, and the bawling continued to echo across the cold landscape.

"Oh, you've gotta make it stop!" Manfred groaned, covering one ear with his trunk. "I can't take it anymore!"

"I've eaten things that didn't complain this much!" snarled Diego.

"He – won't – stop – squirming!" Sid grunted. Roshan had managed to squirm his way into an upside down position, and his kicking feet continuously pummelled Sid in the mouth.

"Sid!" shouted Manfred. "You're holding it the wrong way!"

"Turn it over!" yelled Diego.

"Watch it's head!"
"Just put it down!"

"Jeez!" Sid complained. "Pick him up, put him down, turn him over, ninininininini!" However, he complied, and lay Roshan down on a conveniently placed rock.

Diego padded over to the screaming baby and sniffed his nose. "Its nose is dry!" he exclaimed.

"That means something's wrong with it," Sid stated.

The sabre looked at Sid. "Somebody should lick it, just in case."

Sid got the message. "Alright, I'll do it."

Will Turner started. 'That's not right! He's perfectly healthy.' He stepped forward, ready to help the animals. "Um…"

Jack Sparrow pulled him back.

"Hey!" Will protested. "They need my help. A dry human's nose means it's perfectly fine…"

"They'll figure that out," Jack grinned. "Eventually. They can care for the baby, and we can save Elizabeth, savvy?"

William sighed, and nodded.

Then his face turned serious. "One question about your business, William, or there's no use going. How far are you willing to go to save this girl of yours?"

"I'd die for her," Will growled.

"Oh, good. No problem then."

Will sighed. "But can I still help them?" He gestured to the animals.

"I've got no issues. But if you want to do that, it'll be you alone. I didn't agree to care for a screaming baby."

William nodded. Suddenly, he remembered a possible reason why babies cry.

Sid's tongue had almost reached Roshan's nose, when Will stepped forward. "Hey! You know he's wearing one of those diaper things?"

"Tho?" spat Sid, showering Roshan with drops of saliva.

"So…um…" Will turned red, not sure what to say next in a polite way.

Manfred got the message. "What he's trying to say, Sid, is if the baby poops, where does it go?"

Will looked shocked.

Sid's tongue shot back in his mouth. He started backing away from the baby, looking green in the face. "Humans are disgusting!" he moaned.

Manfred poked the sloth with his trunk. "Okay, you. Check for poop."

"Why do I have to be the poop checker?" whined Sid.

The mammoth towered over the sloth. "Because returning the runt was your idea, because you're small and insignificant, and because I'll pummel you if you don't."

"Why else?" Sid whimpered.

"NOW, SID!"

Sid tiptoed carefully away towards Roshan. Screwing up his face, he started to remove the baby's diaper with a shaking hand.

"Ew!" he gasped. "Eww, yuck! Gross! I mean, my goodness!"

Finally, Sid pulled a clean diaper out of a pocket in Roshan's jacket and fitted it onto the baby. Then he wrapped up the other diaper and walked backwards, waving it in the air. "Alright, coming through!"

"Watch out!" Manfred hollered as the diaper swung near his tusk.

Sid slid past Diego, nearly brushing the tiger with the diaper.

"Stop waving that thing around!" the sabre growled.

"Oooh! Oooh!" the sloth shouted. "I'm gonna slip!"

With a cry, he flung the diaper high into the air. It unravelled in mid-air, and came down right between Manfred's eyes.

Manfred screamed.

Sid burst into hysterical laughter.

Bellowing, Manfred threw the diaper onto the ground.

"It's clean!" Sid laughed. "Got you!"

Sure enough, the diaper was clean as a fresh sheet of paper.

Still chuckling, Sid staggered over to Roshan and picked him up.

Manfred bashed Sid on the head. Sid's head flopped to one side and his tongue stuck out.

Roshan stopped crying and burst into laughter.

Everybody looked at him, eyes wide with amazement.

As soon as Sid shook himself out of his daze, Roshan burst into tears again.

"Hey!" Diego exclaimed. "Do that again. He likes it!"

BAM!

Sid's tongue lolled out of his mouth again. The baby giggled.

"It's making me better too!" Manfred admitted.

BAM!

By now, Sid was quite dizzy from the repeated hitting. He wobbled towards Diego.

"Here, you hold it," he lisped, thrusting Roshan towards the tiger.

BAM!

Diego whacked Sid on the head with his paw.

Roshan giggled harder than ever this time. He tried to slap Sid's face with a flabby hand.

"Stop it!" Sid snapped, grabbing Roshan's hand.

"WAAAAAAAH! WAAAAAH!"

"Oh God, not again!" Will moaned, covering his ears.

Jack looked at him seriously. "Whelp, you'll never make it on board a\ship if you can't cope with loud noises. How loud do you think a cannon is?"

Will took his hands off his ears and gritted his teeth. The pirate was right, though he hated to admit it. There might be a sea battle along the way. 'Who knows what lies ahead?'

The sabre-tooth tiger pushed Sid towards the table. "Turn him towards me!" he ordered.

Sid did as he was told. He gently laid Roshan down on the table and backed away.

Diego covered his eyes with his paws.

"Where's the baby?" he cooed.

Suddenly, he uncovered his eyes and leaped towards the baby. "There he is!"

Roshan stopped crying, and stared up at the tiger with frightened eyes.

"Where's the baby?" Diego repeated. "THERE HE IS!"

"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"
"STOP IT!" Manfred bellowed, pushing Diego away from the screaming baby. "You're scaring him!"

Suddenly, Will had a brainwave. 'If the baby hasn't got a dirty diaper, and he isn't bored, then he must be…hungry!'

"Hey, guys!" he cried, rushing forward. "I think he must be…"

Rrrrrrrr!

Roshan's stomach emitted a loud rumble. The baby stopped crying and looked down at his stomach with surprise.

"I bet he's hungry!" Sid voiced what everybody (except Roshan) had been thinking.

"Most babies drink milk," said Manfred. "We'll need to find some."

"Ooooh! I'd love some too!" cried Sid.

Diego glared at him. "Not you! The baby!"

Sid glared back at the tiger, paws on chubby hips. "Well, in case you haven't noticed, I'm not exactly lactating right now, pal!"

"You're too low on the food chain to be mouthing off to a higher predator, aren't you?"

Back and forth, back and forth they bickered.

"I love it when they argue like this," whispered Jack Sparrow to Will.

"ENOUGH!" screamed Manfred. He couldn't take it anymore.

"Enough!...Enough…nough…" the echo imitated, rolling across the hills.

Suddenly, there was a rustle from their right.

Everybody looked.

Sitting beside a large bush was a very large, very ripe watermelon.

"FOOD!" everybody shouted.

Manfred walked over to the fruit, trunk stretched out to grab it. Just before he reached it, however…

BGAWK!

A dodo leaped out of the bush and grabbed the melon in it's beak. Squawking at the gang a few times, it scampered around a bank and disappeared.

On cue, Roshan burst into tears again.

Manfred, Diego, and Sid (clutching Roshan) rushed after the dodo. Will and Jack lingered for a moment.

"Should we go after them?" Will asked.

"Wait, wait," Jack Sparrow muttered. He pulled his blue compass off his belt, and tapped it with his finger.

Will tried to peek at the swirling arrow.

'Bloody nosy parker.' Jack held the compass higher.

Finally, the arrow settled in the same direction that the dodo had went.

'Perfect,' Jack Sparrow thought. 'The Interceptor is just where I thought it was.'

"Aye, we'll go after them."

"I don't know, but I've been told!"

("I don't know, but I've been told!")

"End of the world be mighty cold!"

("End of the world be mighty cold!")

The 4th Dodo Marching Corps was at its best since it had been formed a few months previously. Sure, one dodo had a tendency to fall over and get squashed by his comrades, but he was the only one now.

All across the compound, dodos were in training – doing star jumps, navigating obstacle courses, and martial arts. Above the compound, on a dodo-nest perch, stood a corporal and his two motivational speakers.

"Prepare for the Ice Age!" one announced.

"Protect the dodo way of life!" the other cried.

The corporal waved his stick-baton excitedly. "Survival separates the dodos from the beasts!" The baton knocked one of the motivational speakers off the perch.

Manfred, Sid, Diego, Will, and Jack found themselves looking out over the dodo military camp as the 4th Dodo Marching Corps marched through the camp.

"Protect the Dodo way of life!" shouted a voice. "Prepare for the Ice Age!"

"Ice age?" Sid asked.

Diego snorted. "Dodos. I've heard of these crackpots."

Jack Sparrow, however, had eyes only for the British navy brigantine tied up to a small wharf…the HMS Interceptor.

"They took the Interceptor here?" asked Will. "Why not take it with them?"

"Commodore Norrington must want to keep it safe," smiled Jack. "But nothing is safe from Captain Jack Sparrow!"

"You mean you're going to steal that ship?" Sid asked.

"Commandeer. Will and I are going to commandeer that ship. It's a nautical term."

He continued. "I will help you catch up to the humans. Taking the ship is much quicker than on land."

Manfred nodded. "Alright. I want to be rid of the sloth and the baby as soon as possible."

Sid hadn't heard a thing. Roshan was screaming louder than ever.

"Uhhh…Manny? Shouldn't we get that watermelon?" he shouted over the baby's cries.

Manfred sighed. "Yep, let's get going." He turned to Jack and Will. "You do your own thing."

The collector dodo waddled over to the stock stump and placed the melon next to the other two. He turned to find another melon…

…and he saw them coming over the hill. A woolly mammoth, a sabre tooth tiger, and a sloth clutching a human baby. One thought flashed through his tiny brain: Intruders.

"WAAAAWK!" the dodo shrieked. "INTRUDERS! INTRUDERS!" He dashed through the camp, still screaming "INTRUDERS!"

He was so preoccupied that he didn't hear the bubbling ahead of him, or the voice of a lecturer dodo, telling other dodos about the dangers of tar.

"Now don't fall in, for if you do you will most definitely…"

"Intruders! Intru – WAAAAAAAAAAAH!"

The collector dodo fell into the tar pit. A spout of steam roared up into the air. The student dodos flinched away from the scalding vapour.

"…burn and die," finished the lecturer dodo in a calm voice.

Manfred, Diego, and Sid continued into the dodo camp.

"Excuse me; can we have our melon back? Junior's hungry." Manfred gestured at Roshan.

"No way!" barked another dodo named Dab. "This is our private stockpile for the ice age!"

He leaped up onto one of the melons. Other dodos gathered around him. "Subarctic temperatures will force us underground for a billion billion years!"

All the other dodos nodded in agreement.

Manfred snorted. "So you'll be underground for ages…and you've got three melons?"

Every dodo eye turned to the three melons.

Suddenly, Jack Sparrow sauntered out of the rocks. "Oi," he said, tapping Dab on the wing. "Is your boat for sale?" He pointed at the Interceptor.

"It's a ship!" snapped the dodo. "And it's a ship of the Royal navy!"

"Is it for sale then? I've got to get a ship to sail somewhere."

"NO!" snapped the dodo. "If you weren't smart enough to get your melons or ships before the ice age, then doom on you!"

"Doom on you!" the dodos chanted, closing in on the group. "Doom on you! Doom on you! Doom on you!"

"Get away from me!" growled Manfred.

Still the dodos marched forwards. "Doom on you! Doom on you!"

Dab was now getting very excited. He flapped his wings as he shouted. "DOOM ON YOU!"

All of a sudden, he lost his balance. "Oh no! Oh no!"

The melon rolled straight into Roshan's waiting arms.

"Retrieve the melon!" blundered Dab. "Tae-kwon-dodos! ATTACK!"

Three dodos leaped up into the air with loud cries of "HIIIIII-YA!"

The dodo in the middle kicked the dodo on the left. The dodo on the right kicked the middle dodo out of the way. Then the dodo on the left kicked the rightmost dodo towards Roshan and Sid. With its strong beak, the dodo flicked the melon out of Roshan's pudgy hands and flung it towards another dodo. He tossed it over his back to the next dodo, who threw it to the next, who threw it…right over the bank and into the river!"

"THE MELON!" screamed the dodo.

A group of dodos dashed towards the bank, and they all tumbled into the river.

"There goes our last female," said Dab to another dodo.

While all the dodos were distracted by the melon, Jack Sparrow and Will Turner tiptoed around the scene and up the gangplank of the Interceptor.

"NOBODY MOVE!" ordered Jack Sparrow. All the remaining dodo's looked up at him. "We are taking the ship!"

"Aye!" growled Will. "And if any one of ya' scurvy featherbags tries to stop us, we'll kill you all! Advast!"

Jack glared at William. "That isn't how pirates actually talk, son."

Dab laughed. "Tae-kwon dodos?"

And a moment later, Jack and Will were nothing but two cyclones of feathers, beaks, feet, and fists.

While the dodos attacked Captain Sparrow and Turner, Sid snuck over to the stump where the remaining two melons sat. 'This is easy,' he thought.

His claw groped around for the melon. Before he could get a grip on it, however, the dodos spotted him. A group of tae-kwon dodos flung themselves at Sid.

Sid instinctively dropped the melon, and it rolled away. The three student dodos chased it over to the tar pit.

The melon rolled up the edge of the pit and flew into the air. The dodos rushed up to the edge of the pit, and standing on tiptoes, caught the melon with the tips of their beaks.

"Got-it-got-it-got-it-got-it…"

They slipped off the edge of the pit.

"…don't got it."

All three dodos tumbled into the tar, closely followed by the watermelon.

"The last melon!" the dodos all gasped.

They flung themselves at the melon. In the scene of confusion, the melon rolled out of the ball of kicking, flapping dodos. Manfred picked it up with his trunk.

Another group of dodos noticed what he was doing. They raced over to Manfred and started jumping up and down, trying to grab the watermelon. The mammoth merely had to hold the melon high up above his head.

However, Dab watched the whole proceedings from behind Manfred's large behind. Something swinging caught his eye…the mammoth's tail. The dodo sniggered. He wound himself up, leaped up in the air…and bit the tail!

"YEOOOOOOOOW!" wailed Manfred, launching the melon into the air. It flew high into the air. The ball of dodos finally realised what was happening, and chased after it.

So did Sid.

The melon finally started falling towards the ground. It landed on the head of a dodo, knocking him out, and bounced across three more, before landing in Sid's open claws.

'Yippee!' Sid thought 'I've got the melon!'

Then he realised where he was. He was backed up against the far bank of the dodo camp.

Gulping, he looked up.

The scene was not good. The pirate captain and the blacksmith were lying on the ground in front of the Interceptor, held to the ground by a dozen dodos each. And Sid could see he was surrounded by a vast blue-grey wall.

It took several seconds for Sid to realise that the wall was actually the dodo army. They surrounded him all across the training grounds. Squadrons of dodos stood on the guard posts, glaring down at him. Every dodo had a menacing gleam in its eye.

Then the sloth looked up to see Manfred, Diego, and Roshan, all looking at him with pleading looks. It was Roshan who looked the most pleading. He let out a whine as he looked at Sid.

That was when Sid realised what this was all about. It was for the baby. And Sid decided he would do anything to help this little bundle of joy.

Parental instinct kicked in for the first time.

Sid gritted his teeth, glared back at the dodos…and ran forward, yelling a war cry.

The tidal wave of dodos ran forward too.

Sid smashed into the dodos, using his momentum as a weapon and swinging the watermelon like a club.

Dodos flew into the air and landed hard on the ground. A group of dodos landed on another dodos back, and they tottered around like a pile of clowns in a circus.

Sid continued running, taking great leaping bounds. Unconsciously, he was heading towards the Interceptor.

The next scene seemed to happen in slow motion.

Sid barely noticed the ring of dodos heading towards him. He didn't even know what he was doing. Somehow, though, he knew exactly what he needed to do.

He leaped.

The dodos leaped too.

But Sid leaped higher than any of the birds, who banged into each other and knocked each other out.

Sid continued to fly, towards the gangplank of the Interceptor, not even caring if he injured himself.

Manfred, Diego, Jack Sparrow, Will Turner, and Roshan all stared in wonder and horror. Roshan let out a frightened whimper and covered his eyes.

But Sid landed safely. He touched the melon to the planks of the gangplank, like a pro rugby player scoring a try.

The sloth bounced and rolled, clutching the watermelon to his chest. Finally, he came to a stop…

…on the deck of the Interceptor.

Roshan uncovered his eyes, realised that Sid and the melon were safe, and lifted his arms in celebration.

Manfred and Diego cheered loudly. Jack and Will whooped and leaped off the ground, throwing off the shocked dodos who were all staring at Sid.

Sid let out a scream of triumph, holding the melon high up in the air.

Dab the dodo let out a groan, and slumped on the ground.

Will watched as Sid boogied and shimmied on the deck of the Interceptor. 'Wouldn't you know…the sloth did it! Nobody knew that he had it in him.'

Finally Sid lifted the melon high in the air…and in his excitement, threw it down on the hard wooden deck.

SPLAT!

The melon smashed into pieces.

Manfred and Diego stared at the sloth with angry eyes.

"AAARGH! Sid!" Diego growled. "Now we've gotta find more food!"

"No you don't!" said Will happily. "Look!"

Roshan had untangled himself from Manfred's furry trunk and had crawled up the gangplank. Now he was sitting on the deck of the vessel, chomping happily on mushy pink pieces of watermelon.

Sid looked back at the mammoth and the tiger with a huge grin on his face.

A voice sounded out behind them. "Right! Right! Right! Now left! No, the other left! Left! Right! Right!"

A tower of dodos wobbled about, searching for more melons. The dodo at the top bellowed out commands. "Left! Right! Left! Left! Left!"

But the dodo at the bottom wasn't very good at steering. He lurched towards the cliff, and lost his balance. The whole dodo tower went tumbling off the cliff.

Manfred snorted. "Look. It's dinner and a show."

Will laughed. "I'll give that species another twenty thousand years. Tops."

Manfred looked down at the blacksmith. "That was the same guess as me. I never asked before, but what's your name?"

"Will. Will Turner."

The mammoth rolled the name around in his mouth. "Will Turner…I like it. Nice strong name."

"Me too," said Sid from on board the Interceptor. "It's a good name."

William smiled at these compliments. He was starting to see the beginnings of a lasting friendship with the sloth and the mammoth.