Chapter 10 : Good Ol' Prank Day

I'm pretty sure this is the most screwed up chapter yet. Palletshipping. (at least...on Ash's side.)

Ash - 5 - does not like school ; recently kissed Gary on the lips

Gary - 5 - does not like school ; is very creeped out by Ash's kiss ; still hates teacher

Axletia - 6 - very dominant ; crush on Gary ; has grown

Carid - 6 - likes school , and is a brainiac ; does not like the teacher

Tracey Sketchit - 6 - likes drawing ; lived in the woods before he got a forced education by the police ; person who the kids beat up on

Kiba Inuzuka - 6 - Naruto character

Naruto Uzumaki - 6 - Naruto character ; has A.D.D. and is Nine Tails Fox ; is in Miss Moo's class Teacher - pretty old and ugly

Spring finally came in Pallet Town. Flowers bloomed, bake sales were made, (and Ash's parents finally divorced, but that's a loooong story).

So finally it was April 1st, a.k.a. April Fool's Day. Ash seemed depressed about something. It was about twenty minutes before he had to take the bus to school. He was waiting with Gary, Carid, and Axletia as usual. Gary noticed this. " Hey, Ketchum. What's wrong ? You seem a bit down today. "

" Eh. Look, it's April 1st, and we haven't even made a plan to hurt the school, " Ash said. " Where will our legacy be in five years when we're big fifth graders ? "

" You're right, Ash, " Gary muttered. " We have got to find a way to get Miss Hartford and everyone else mad to the core. "

" Oh, God, " Carid said. " You guys are going to make another stupid plan, aren't you ? "

" They sure are, " Axletia replied. " Look, Gary has his Red Crayon of Death out. "

" Great. "

(School...)

Ash, Gary, Tracey, Kiba, and a student from Miss Moo's class named Naruto Uzumaki stood around a toilet in a bathroom stall. Gary banged on a plastic gavel. " Okay, did we check the stalls ? "

Tracey nodded. " Yes, Mr. Oak. "

Ash cleared his throat. " Okay, then. Today is April 1st, the day that we all get together to trash this place. Do we have any ideas ? "

" I need to pee, believe it ! " Naruto hissed.

" Not yet ! " Gary warned. " Anyway, we have to make sure we don't get caught by the fat-assed Miss Moo, or the psychopath bitch, Miss Hartford. What do we do ? "

" Heck, I say we burn everything ! " Ash replied.

-.- " Okay, nobody listen to Ketchum because he's had waaay too much sugar. "

Ash scowled. Kiba raised his hand. " Why don't we set our pee on fire ? It will leave one bad stench in the hallways. "

" We need something better, " Tracey said. " Something...more destructive. "

" Wow. Sketchit finally has a good point, " Naruto said, gawking at Tracey.

" Hmm...I have the best prank ever, " Ash said. " I have a chemistry set in my backpack. Maybe...we can flood all the toilets ! "

Gary snapped a finger. " Cool ! Let's try it ! "

(9 : 15 a.m. - Miss Hartford's classroom)

" Okay, kids. How was your spring break ? " Miss Hartford said in a dull voice.

" Okay, " the kids said.

The old teacher shuddered. " Damn. Anyway, we have surprise guests today. Stupid brats...meet the preschoolers. "

A bunch of three and four old kids started coming out into the room. Most of the kids sweatdropped. Miss Hartford took a chug at her flask. " This sucks. "

(9 : 15 a.m. - in the bathroom)

" So...how do we make the toilets go BOOM ? " Naruto asked.

" I'm thinking, I'm thinking ! "Ash hissed.

" You can hurry up, though, Ketchum, " Gary muttered.

" Oh, give me a break, Oaky. I'm five ! Now let me think, darn it ! "

Ten minutes passed before a click was heard in Ash's head. " By Jove, I think I got it ! "

-tick-tick-tick-tick-ti-

(9 : 30 a.m. - Principal Fairydust's office)

" Okay...Mr. Juan, is it ? "

" Oui, oui, piggy. "

" So...why do you want to be the vice principal ? " Principal Fairydust asked.

" Well, I just love kids. They're sooo adorable ! I have a son myself - he's twenty. Every day after school I would make him sandwiches before I violate- I mean...played violent video games with him. "

" Oh ? What kind ? "

" Grand Theft Auto. Spyro. That one game with the purple dinosaur. "

" Oh. Hmm...what kind of creden(hic)tials do you have ? "

Juan fiddled with his mustache. " Well...I'm a gym leader. I worked at a daycare. And I make excellent martinis ! "

" Wow. Let me think about it. I'll tell you...around...11 : 15. "

" Deal. "

(9 : 45 a.m. - Miss Hartford's classroom)

Two preschoolers were on a desk. Three preschoolers were peeing on the floor. Most of the kindergarteners were huddled up in one corner. Carid and Axletia looked at Miss Hartford, and then at each other. " Uh, Teacher ? " Axletia asked. " Are you all right ? "

" No, I'm not, " Miss Hartford croaked. " These little bastards tie for worst hellions with Oak and Ketchum...where are they, anyway ? "

Carid shrugged. " Eh. We don't know. "

" Oh. "

(9 : 50 a.m. - in the bathroom)

" Okay...and we're done, " Ash said, holding the chemical bag in his hand.

" So...put it in the toilet, then, " Kiba said.

" All righty, then ! "

KABOOM !

The toilets immediately started to overflow with water. All five kids sweatdropped. Gary gasped. " Oh, crap, this is just like C.S.I. "

" What do we do ? " Ash asked.

" Uh, we run. Find an exit route. "

-poof!-

Ash turned a fiery shade of red. " Those airheads ! Inuzuka, Sketchit, and Uzumaki ditched us ! "

" Those bastards. They will pay. "

" Hmm. Let's go. "

" Right. "

(9 : 50 a.m. - Principal Fairydust's office) - Fairydust's POV

Oh, damn, I need a drink. I think I might just let that fruity guy be the vice principal.

Let's see...what drink should I have today ? Beer ? Scotch ? Long Island Ice Tea ? A bottle of whiskey, just like my daddy drank in the war ?

Eh...another glass of Rummy Boy should do it.

tick-tick-tick-tick-ti

(10 : 00 a.m. - Miss Hartford's classroom)

" Where the hell is Ash and Gary at ?! " Carid demanded. " They're going to get into so much trouble. "

" Yeah...Gary. "

" Are you listening to me, Axletia ?! "

" No. "

Carid sighed and threw a square block at the wall. " These stupid preschoolers don't make any matters any better, either. "

" Yeah, who let them here today, anyway ? "

" I don't know. They're just driving me crazy. "

(10 : 15 a.m. - hallways)

" So...you made a bag that's going to blow up the whole school ?! " Gary demanded. " Ketchum, you are the biggest idiot that I know ! "

" I know. We have about an hour before it blows. "

Gary stopped to an abrupt halt. " Uh, where are we, anyway ? "

" Fifth grader hallway, " Ash breathed. " I never dreamed of seeing anything as beautiful as this architecture. "

" Yeah...seems very romantic. "

Ash looked at Gary. " Gary...since we might die anyway, I want to tell you something. The New Year's thing...it was no fluke. I have a crush on you, Gary. "

" Oh. "

" Can I...kiss you. "

Gary sweatdropped. " Are you serious, dude ?! I don't like you that way ! "

" I know, but since we're going to die and going to Hell, anyway..."

" Ketchum, five year olds do not go to Hell ! "

" WE'RE STILL GOING TO DIE ! "

Gary slapped a hand over Ash's mouth and smacked him on the head with his other hand. " Do you want us to get caught ?! " he angrily whispered. " Fine. I guess I'll kiss you. "

He shoved Ketchum against the wall and kissed him on the lips. Ash blushed as he dropped the bag.

Finally, both boys looked at each other. Gary glared at Ash. " You tell anybody about this and you will die, Ketchum. "

" ...Agreed. "

(10 : 25 a.m. - Principal Fairydust's office)

" (hic) That's a good rum. Want some, Juan ? "

" No, sir. "

Principal Fairydust let out an alcoholic induced giggle. " You're my buddy, Juan ! "

" Same here. "

The two men started hugging each other. Suddenly, the principal nudged Juan. " Uh, do you want some granola bars ? My ho made it. "

" That lady Miss Hartford ? "

" Uh, that's her name ? Whoa. I have been drinking too much. "

(10 : 40 a.m. - Miss Hartford's classroom)

" Uh, Miss Hartford ? " someone asked. " Where is the water coming from ? "

" Damned leaky pipes. "

" Oh. "

The teacher groaned as she slammed a textbook against her head. " I hate this school. "

A bunch of preschoolers peed on the chalkboard. Miss Hartford sweatdropped. " Damn it, Steve. "

(10 : 55 a.m. - bathroom)

The water gurgled.

A couple of toilets exploded.

Three squirrels exploded.

And four Squirtle were playing poker.

Just waiting for the inevitable DOOM.
(11 : 13 a.m. - hallways)

" Look ! " Ash cried. " It's the exit ! "

Gary cursed. " Crap, we're not going to make it out of here in time ! "

Ash paled. " We have only one way to get out of here. "

" What's that ? "

" I'm gonna push you out forcibly. "

O.o " No, Ketchum ! That's suicide ! You can't do it ! "

" Gary, I have a temporary crush on you. It's the only way. "

-PUSH ! -

Gary was pushed outside of the school, falling to the ground. Ash came afterwards, falling on top of him. The black haired boy grabbed Gary's shirt collar and dragged him away.

Gary looked admiringly at Ash. " You're a good friend, Ketchum. "

" No, don't you dare die on me ! " Ash screamed. " We're gonna make it, Oaky ! We're going to make it, damn it ! "

With adrenaline-based force, Ash threw Gary ten feet right in front of a tree. Ash covered himself and Gary with the bag.

-tick-tick-tick-tick-tick-tick-tick

KA - BOOOOOOOOOOOOM !

Everyone was flooded out. Kids and teachers scurried out of the school, drenched in water. Ash sighed in relief. " It's over, Gary. "

" Thanks, Ketchum. "

" Now we have to hide out. I only know one place - Dad's temporary apartment. "

Gary wobbly stood up. " Yeah, let's get away from this dump. "

(Meanwhile...)

OAAAAAAAK ! KETCHUUUUUUM ! "

(12 : 00 p.m. - apartment in Viridian...)

" So...how long do you think we have before we die ? " Gary inquired.

" I dunno. "

" Your mom will be so mad at us. "

" I know. I give it two hours. "

" So...how did you get access to your dad's apartment ? "

" Swiped his spare keys. "

Gary chugged at a can of Pepsi. " Yeah...we're dead. "

" But still, it was worth i- "

Suddenly the door slammed, and the two boys were face-to-face with Giovanni, who sweatdropped. " What the hell are you two kids doing here ?! "

Ash cleared his throat. " A very good reason, Dad. If the school calls over here, we are not here. We are dead because of some sex addict raping us. "

" WHAT DID YOU TWO DO ?! "

" Nothing..." both boys trailed off.

The phone started ringing. Giovanni answered it. " Uh, hello ? "

" Yes, is a Gary Oak and a Ash Ketchum here ? "

" Unfortunately, yes. What the hell did they do ? "

" Why don't you ask the flooded school ?! "

Giovanni gave a death glare at Ash before continuing the conversation. " How did this happen ? "

" There was a chemical bag in a toilet. The perfect crime for two ten year olds. "

-.- " They're five. "

" Oh...really ? "

" I'll deal with them. "

-CLICK!-

Ash tugged at Gary's sleeve. " Let's g- "

YANK !

" No, you're not, " Giovanni muttered, clinging to Ash's collar. " You two are going home. "

" But why, Dad ? You always say that living as an outcast is great. "

" Yeah, and that got me thrown out of the house and divorced. Now, let's go. "

(2 : 20 p.m.)

" COURT DATE ?! " Delia roared. " You got a court date on Memorial Day ?! "

" Pranks pay, " Ash muttered.

" Redford Satoshi Ketchum, you and Gary go to your room. "

" Bu - "

" NOW ! "

Gary glared at Ash. " Why am I friends with you ? "

" We're both juvenile deliqueens. "

" It's deliquents. "

" Oh, that too. "

End

Will Juan become vice principal ? What happened to the preschoolers ? Will Ash ever get his vocabulary right ? And what will happen to the other boys ? Find out in the next chapter ! (mwahahaha!)