Day 221

February 8, 2025

The last few days in the bunker haven't been all that bad. I think I'm on The Man's good side, since she gave me my own room after the run a few days back. Bayley is still her normal self. She's so happy to have her husband back, and I'm happy for her. I just wish we could find out what happened to Seth.

I'm not allowed to leave the bunker without permission. I asked Ambrose about leaving the bunker on my own, but he said The Man wouldn't like that and would probably not let me back in. I guess I'm not completely on her good side. I feel safe and I like the bunker, so I think I'll avoid upsetting The Man for the foreseeable future.

Trevor, Ricochet's real name, is a really sweet guy. He's trying to teach me how to clean guns. It's not as easy as it looks, but I think I'll get the hang of it. Seth always said I was a quick learner.

I miss Seth.

Sincerely, Sasha Mercedes Banks

Sasha read back her latest journal entry. She'd only been in the bunker with The Man's group for four days, but she felt like she'd been there far longer. Maybe it was because she climbed in rank so quickly, or maybe because the security of a well hidden home and a warm meal three times a day gave her a comfort she hadn't felt since Braun's cabin. Comfort wasn't really something Sasha had since before the war. She did feel comfortable when Seth watched over her when she slept. If he were there with her, in the bunker, she'd probably feel completely at ease for the first time since the bombs started dropping. But that wasn't possible with Seth still missing.

A soft knock came at Sasha's bedroom door. The now fully brunette woman dropped her pen in her trusty purple notebook and closed the cover. The bunker had a hair stylist, a flamboyant man named Patrick, that gave Sasha a cute yet war appropriate mid-length haircut to rid her of her purple locks.

Liv stood at Sasha's door with a gentle smile. "Good morning, Sasha." The young woman chirped.

"I don't need sex, Liv," Sasha felt herself telling the teen that same sentence almost every time they encountered. Sasha did feel like sex would help de-stress her a little, but not with a girl who was barely old enough to drive.

"Uh, actually I'm not offering that," Liv explained. "The Queen wants to talk to you. She's in The Man's office waiting."

"What does she need?" Sasha asked. Charlotte never spoke to her without the presence of her wife. Maybe it was something to do with The Man.

Liv shrugged. "Dunno. She just said to send you right away. She seemed pretty serious too. I think it's about The Man, because she wasn't there."

Sasha nodded. "Thanks, Liv. I'll go see her right away."

Liv hesitated a moment. "I like your hair. Patrick did a really good job."

"Thanks, Liv," Sasha said with a grin, sending the younger woman away finally.

Sasha took a second to prepare herself for her meeting with the queen. It was a curious situation to talk to her, apparently without The Man present, but Sasha wasn't going to make the woman wait.

Sasha found the door to The Man's office partially open. She knocked once, then stepped inside.

"Ah, Sasha," The Queen greeted with a smile. "Good for you to make it. My wife will be joining us shortly. She told me to send for you."

"Oh, The Man will be coming?" Sasha asked. The way Liv worded it, Sasha was sure The Man wouldn't be there, but it wasn't Liv's fault for speculating the wrong thing.

The Queen nodded. "Yes, she will be here soon. My wife had to check ammunition inventory before she met with us."

Sasha nodded. Queen Charlotte definitely believed in her nickname. The way she presented herself had a sense of royalty by itself, standing under the fluorescent light to give herself an extra glow and speaking clear and precise with careful enunciation.

"Do you know what she wants to talk about?" Sasha asked.

Charlotte shook her head. "My wife doesn't discuss her plans with me. The only way I learn information is by standing in on her meetings with her staff."

Sasha didn't say anything after that. The Queen was eyeing her, scanning her up and down, probably trying to get a better idea of who Sasha was. Just a tired and rugged barista from Boston, nothing special, Sasha thought to herself.

"I'm sorry about what happened to your family," Sasha said, offering some sympathy to break the silence. "I don't know where Seth is and a good man who took me in didn't make it when Corbin attacked us."

Queen Charlotte's eyes softened. "Thank you, Sasha. I appreciate your sympathy for my wife and me. I lost my father, my brothers and my sister during this war. Thankfully, I've had my wife to lean on."

"How long have you been married to The Man?" Sasha asked.

"Ten years, this fall," Charlotte stated with a smile. "Been a wonderful decade with my Rebecca, good times and bad."

"Rebecca?" Sasha asked.

"Get me name out yer mouth, lass," The Man hissed as she bumped past Sasha. Sasha hadn't heard The Man enter the room. Had she knew The Man was present, she wouldn't have said her real name.

"Sorry, sir," Sasha said.

"I bet you are," The Man muttered. "So, I reckon you know I have a bone to pick with Corbin. What can you tell me about him?"

Sasha shrugged. "I don't know. He's pro-life-"

"I could give two fucks less what side of t'e war he's on," The Man spat. "I want to know why he targeted you and yours specifically. He doesn't come after small groups unless he's recruiting. He would've shot you all in your sleep if he t'ought you were a threat. Why did he come for you and why are you still alive?"

Sasha thought immediately about the baby in Bayley's belly. Bayley swore it was her husband's, but Corbin apparently thought the child was his. How could he think Bayley would want to come live with him and raise "their" child after he assaulted her and tried to kill Roman? It gave Sasha an uneasy feeling in her stomach to think about. But did should she tell The Man the reason Corbin tried to kill them was because Bayley is pregnant? Sasha had a feeling The Man would do everything in her power to keep Corbin from Bayley, but Sasha also didn't know The Man or what she was going to do about a pregnant liability.

"My friend, Bayley, is pregnant," Sasha stated.

"Yes, she is a very lovely girl," Queen Charlotte said with a bright smile. "She helped me count inventory yesterday. Quite the chatterbox, but still a very nice person."

"The Queen has chores too?" Sasha thought, finding that surprising. "Yeah, she's pregnant with her husband. But Corbin thinks it's his child."

The Man scoffed. "Your friend had sex with Corbin? And you expect me to house her and her bastard?"

Sasha shook her head. "He... raped her, sir. He forced himself on her when she was trying to go to sleep. She was in his group before she knew who he was. She left after she was assaulted and they've been after her and Roman ever since."

The Man always had an angry look of hatred in her eyes, but the moment Sasha mentioned the horrible act Corbin committed, The Man's eyes turned dark and she clenched her fists at her side.

"It's going to be a good feelin' when I stick his head on a fookin' pike," The Man growled, a chuckle escaping her throat and a scary smile spreading across her lips. "Do you know where he could be?"

Sasha shook her head. "No, but I think Bayley and Roman might. Like I said, they were in his group for a while. Maybe they can tell you where they are and we figure out an attack."

"Don't start callin' shots you aren't ready to take, girlie," Becky said. "You haven't killed no one who's done ya dirty. Those two mercs at Money in the Bank were nothin'. Besides, no one's allowed to put a bullet in Corbin's head 'cept fer me. Understand?"

Sasha nodded her head. "Yes, sir. I understand."

"Good," The Man gestured at the door. "Find Miss Alexa and find a job to do. We're going on a run tomorrow."

"Yes, sir," Sasha dismissed herself from The Man's office. Thinking about Corbin made Sasha's blood boil. The image of his lifeless body sprawled in a dirty alleyway gave her hope and a fire to keep fighting. But, for now, she'd have to make herself useful.

Miss Alexa greeted Sasha with a smile when the newest member of the "Queen's Court" entered her office. Ambrose, as was expected, was also in Alexa's office.

"Dude, no more purple hair?" Ambrose asked, sat atop Alexa's desk.

Sasha shook her head. "Not until we find a bottle of purple hair dye during a run."

"What can I help you with?" Alexa asked.

"The Man said to come find a job from you," Sasha told. "Something physical, preferably. I'm a little pissed off right now."

"PMS?" Ambrose asked. Alexa scoffed and elbowed her lover, obviously not happy with his bluntness.

"No, I was talking to The Man about Corbin. Thinking about him makes my fucking skin crawl." Sasha said.

"How much of that is backed up libido?" Ambrose asked.

"Dean!" Alexa exclaimed, throwing the lieutenant a dirty look.

"Seriously, when's the last time you got laid?" Ambrose asked. "My mind is completely clear all day because I get to knock boots with this little hottie. Lex, are you ever frustrated during the day?"

"When you don't shut up," Alexa snapped.

"Right, then what do you do to get focus again?" Ambrose asked.

Alexa rolled her eyes. "Whatever. You don't know anything."

Ambrose chuckled. "I'm serious, Sasha," he told the other woman. "You either shoot something, hit something or fuck something. Since you can't do two of those things without getting your ass thrown out of here, what are you going to do?"

Sasha shook her head. "I only want to have sex with one person, and he's not here."

"There's Liv-"

"No," Sasha stated. "I'm not sleeping with an underage girl. That's all kinds of not ok."

Ambrose shrugged. "Alright, but at least think about it. I mean, if I wasn't committed to the love of my life, I'd take a shot at The Man. Got this fantasy where I'm a cop and she's, like, this nerdy science chick..." He paused when he caught Alexa's eye. "What? I was kidding."

"Love of your life, huh?" Alexa grinned.

Ambrose stared off into space for a second, then sighed. "Fuck, I did say that. Uh, Sasha go help Ricochet with guns. He tries doing shit by himself, but it's at least a two person job."

Sasha nodded. "Ok. The Man says we got a run tomorrow."

Ambrose nodded. "Yeah, we're visiting the Twins's camp. Gotta pay respects for Brie and shit. Maybe trade. Probably hit up a grocery store on the way back."

Sasha started to leave the office, but she started moving faster when Alexa jumped to her feet and threw her arms around Ambrose's neck.

Ricochet wasn't excited when Sasha showed up to help him with guns, but he was thankful for the company. Nikki was sitting in the corner of the room, muttering to herself and cradling an assault rifle. Thankfully, the gun didn't have an ammo clip in it.

"What do you have to do?" Sasha asked, flinching slightly when Nikki started laughing.

Ricochet tapped a clipboard with his pen. "Just count guns. Then we gotta count ammo. Just make sure the numbers add up. If a gun is missing, we have to report it to The Man and she'll handle it. I've only seen it happen once, though. A revolver went missing and some shells."

"What did The Man do?" Sasha asked.

Ricochet chuckled. "Booted the guy out on his ass and gave Gallows a kill order if he came back. We thought she was just being harsh and Gallows wouldn't do anything violent. Then about an hour later, we heard Gallows unload on some poor bastard. Nobody moved, but The Man took care of the body. Be glad you don't have to clean the furnace."

Sasha swallowed hard. "So, The Man has no tolerance for bullshit."

Ricochet shook his head. "None. I don't blame her. There's no room for that kind of shit in today's world."

"Fair enough," Sasha agreed. She gestured at Nikki, who was still giggling and cuddling her gun. "Did you count Nikki's gun?"

"No, I hadn't. Good call, kid," Ricochet made a note in his notes.

"Kid? You can't be that much older than me," Sasha kidded. "You're, what, twenty-seven?"

"Thirty," Ricochet chuckled. "Thank you for the compliment though. My wife used to give me all kinds of hell for my age."

Sasha felt a confusing wave of disappointment wash over her. "I didn't know you were married. Is your wife here?"

Ricochet shook his head. "No, she's at the safe zone in Stamford. We visit there every once in a while to trade or see if they have people they can't bring in. So many people try to go there for safety that Stamford actually has to turn some people down. They haven't in a while, but it's happened."

"How do you keep in touch with them?" Sasha asked.

"Runner's transport letters between us," Ricochet said. "That would be you, but we stopped sending ours out."

"Why?" Sasha asked curiously.

"Our last runner showed up without a head last time," Ricochet checked a box on his checklist. He chuckled at the horrified look on Sasha's face. "Don't worry, Sasha. We don't send our runner's out anymore for that kind of thing. Stamford sends us a convoy every now and again to bring us goods. We trade, because they still need supplies too. They give us a few people they can't take in. That only happens every once in a while though. No one's head has been sent in a cardboard box in a while."

"That's happened too?" Sasha croaked, starting to feel ill.

"Yeah, how do you think we found out our last runner died? His body showed up in Stamford, his head came back." Ricochet said.

Sasha dry heaved, forcing a howling laugh from Ricochet.

"Don't worry," Ricochet added. "The last runner was a prisoner we had. He tried leaving his last group, they didn't like that obviously, so they took care of their own problem for us."

"Oh my god," Sasha shuttered.

"Yeah, but at least now all we have to do is count ammo now," Ricochet check on Nikki with a quick glance. "She doesn't have a clip this time, so everything should be here."

Sasha checked on Nikki again. The damaged woman was aiming her weapon across the room and making gunshots with her mouth.

"Pew, pew, says the fun toy," Nikki muttered crazily. "Pew, pew, makes the bad people go away! Pew, pew, pew!"

"Jesus Christ," Sasha sighed.

"Yeah, it'd be nice if he showed up again right about now," Ricochet commented. "But, until then, we got ammo to count."

After lunch, Sasha headed for her bedroom to fiddle with her radio. She had almost got it going a few times in the last few days, but she really wanted to hear the raspy voice of the DJ she, Seth and Bayley stumbled upon that one day in Braun's cabin. It wasn't the man's voice that gave her comfort, but more a sense of nostalgia from when things were a little more simple.

Sasha twisted a few knobs on the radio's surface. She almost started to give up hope when, through the static, Sasha could hear the man's voice again.

"...like I always says. I just hope to see my boy Cas and sweet Carmella again. Hope yous guy's are doin' ok. Until then, let's play some tuneage, eh?"

Sasha fixed the radio until the sound came in as best as she thought it could get in an underground bunker. It was surprising she had a signal at all, let alone one this clear.

"Hey, you fixed it," Liv said from Sasha's door. "I thought I heard Enzo's voice a second ago. He was my favorite radio host back home."

"Enzo, huh?" Sasha noted. "He's got a good taste in music."

Liv grinned. "Yeah, I love ACDC. Reminds me of before the war."

Sasha gave the young woman a once over. "Can I talk to you, Liv? Or are you doing something?"

Liv shook her head. "Nope, I'm free to talk," she stepped into Sasha's room and shut the door. "What's up, sister?"

"No offense," Sasha began when Liv sat beside her on the bed. "But why do you... Sell your body to get by? I mean, I think there are other ways to earn your keep."

Liv chuckled nervously. "Yeah, I figured you'd ask me that at some point. It's not that I'm not good at anything or something like that. I can use a knife just fine and I can defend myself. It's just that sex helps me forget that there's freaking war going on outside over stupid crap, ya know? Like, my boyfriend and I would hook up whenever we got stressed out. We didn't even want to sometimes. But it was a good way to forget about the stress. Then a URP firing squad showed up. Then my boyfriend died. And so did my parents. Then the Bella Twins found me, starving and almost dead. They took me in, made me better, then put me to work. They asked what my specialty was and... Well, you get it."

"Shit, I feel bad for judging you now," Sasha said.

Liv shook her head, making her wavy blonde hair a whirlwind of yellow. "It's no harm done. I would've done the same, if I were you. But, anyway, I'll leave you be. I'm sure I can find something to distract myself with until someone wants a release."

Sasha sighed. "Wait," Liv stopped getting up and settled back down. "Look, I need to get some stress off me, ok?"

Liv giggled. "Oh yeah? I thought you were into guys?"

Sasha snickered. "There is this one guy. Seth. When I see him again, he'll be all I need. But..."

Liv patted Sasha's knee. "Don't worry, Sasha. I won't say anything to him when he shows up. Besides, it's just sex. You'll be ok, don't worry."

Sasha hesitated for a minute, but then she leaned close to Liv and softly pecked her on the lips.

"This is so weird for me," Sasha admitted.

Liv giggled. "Don't worry. I'll do everything. You just relax. Think about Seth if you need to."

Sasha laid back, resting her head on her pillow. Liv gave her another peck on the lips, giggled, then sat back on her feet. Sasha lifted her hips to help the young woman strip off her raggedy jeans. Sasha followed Liv closely, watching the blonde kiss the inside of her thighs. Sasha closed her eyes and pictured the man she missed dearly as Liv's tongue finally touched her center.

Day 222

February 9, 2025

Well, last night was weird. I had sex with Liv. It was nice to forget about the outside world for a while, but it made me remember how much I miss Seth. I don't just want to sleep with him. I want to know he's safe and I want to tell him how I feel. I love him so much and I need to let him know. We'll find him, I'm sure of it.

Sincerely, Sasha Mercedes Banks

"What's with you today?" Ambrose asked Sasha while he secured a knife harness to her leg.

"What do you mean?" Sasha asked.

"I don't know. Usually you have a bad case of resting bitch face, but you seem pretty chill today," Ambrose stood up to look Sasha in the eye. "Did you screw around with Liv like I told you?"

Sasha sheepishly dropped her head. "I don't want to hear shit from you, Ambrose."

Ambrose shook his head. "I'm not saying anything. Feels better though, right? One less thing to worry about."

"You're not gonna make a big deal about it?" Sasha asked. "Tell me how it's a fantasy to see me with another girl or something like that?"

Ambrose chuckled. "No, I only talk that way to Alexa, because she can't stand it. Besides, my mom's into chicks so I don't find them sexy at all."

Sasha snickered. "I find that hard to believe, but alright."

The Man took head at the front of the room. She gave a heartfelt speech about how they'd be back by sundown. She kissed her wife goodbye, then led the way out of the bunker.

"Ready?" Ricochet asked Sasha.

Sasha nodded once. "I'm ready."

With that, The Man's inner circle, with the exception of Candice, filed out of the bunker.