She drew a deep breath in and let the warm, spring sunshine hit her face. The warmth of the weather was about the only cheerfulness she found on that day. Everything else seemed out of place, surreal and the pain was almost too much to bare.

She pushed her sunglasses down off her head and placed them over her red, irritated eyes and pushed forward. Somehow she had to continue on with her day, even if it would be the hardest thing she would do. She didn't know where her strength would come from, and frankly, she didn't care. She just wanted today to be over with, so she could move forwards.

Even if that seemed harsh and not at all possible, she had to look ahead.

As she climbed into the large SUV, she managed a weak smile as she looked at Ken before staring ahead, not saying a word. He was worried about her. She had became relatively distant over the past few weeks, and he couldn't imagine the pain she was feeling. He couldn't even begin to understand it. He hated seeing his girlfriend suffering the way she was.

"You sure you're ok?" he asked, as he made his way through the early morning traffic.

"Yeah." she replied simply, not taking her eyes away from the road.

"You know if you wanna talk, I'm here, right?" he urged, wishing she would say something else besides the simple, one-answer replies he had grown accustom to hearing recently.

"I know, Ken." she said, slightly irritated.

"Lexi..." he trailed off, before relieving a deep, exhausted sigh.

"What Ken? What do you want me to say?" she asked, throwing the glasses from her eyes and glaring at the man beside her.

"Anything you say would be more than what I've gotten from you here lately." he exclaimed, looking at her, pleading for her to talk to him.

"And what's that suppose to mean?" she asked, folding her arms across her chest.

"Lexi, I don't know. I just wish you would talk to me a little more. I don't know what you're feeling or what you're thinking. I know you're going through a lot right now, but damn, you used to talk to me." he replied softly.

"So, what would you tell me?" she pressed, almost challenging him.

"What?" he asked, thrown off by her bitterness.

"Never mind." she hissed, slumping down into the seat as she stared out the window.

He slammed his palms into the steering wheel and focused on his driving. He realized talking with her was going nowhere, and he didn't want to press the issue any further than he already had. He didn't want to fight with her.

He just simply wanted to understand where she was coming from, what she was feeling and to see her actually deal with her emotions, instead of suppress them and not tell him anything.

They drove another couple minutes in silence, before he drove up the short roadway to the graveyard. He heard her release a long breath as he parked the car and cut the engine. Her knee began shaking as he turned in his seat and gave her a weak smile.

"You ready for this?" he asked softly.

She continued looking out the window, knowing what lie ahead of her, but not really sure herself if she was ready to face the reality of why she was here now. She finally looked at Ken and simply shook her head before he exited the car and made his way to her side. He helped her from the car, all the while, her eyes fixated on the large stone positioned just mere feet in front of them.

She had never had the strength before to visit her parents grave site after their burial. Instead, she would give Ken money on different holidays and occasions to pick some flowers or wreaths out to place on their site. She knew she couldn't get around not coming any longer, especially since the anniversary of their death had arrived.

She needed to visit them for clarity and understanding for herself. She needed to get everything out she had been holding in for so long. She would never forget the family gatherings and parties, Christmases and other holidays, first days of school and graduations, dances and proms, birthdays and vacations.

So many memories came flooding back to her and without warning, the tears came spilling down her cheeks. She had no words to say at the moment. Instead, her emotions sent her reeling; unable to think, unable to speak.

She collapsed onto her knees to the ground, as her shoulders shook, the pain stabbing through her, like a hot, searing knife piercing through her soul. She continued to sob uncontrollably as Ken knelt beside her, the tears evident in his own eyes, as he simply gathered her in his arms, trying to console her in any way he could think of.

"I'm so sorry." she managed to say through her tears.

"Shhh, baby." he cooed, trying to calm her. "It's alright."

"I'm so sorry." she muttered once more, grabbing at his shirt, as she only cried harder.

"Baby, why are you sorry?" he asked, forcing her to look at him.

"I never wanted to disappoint them. I only wanted to make them proud. To make you proud." she cried, as she wiped at her tears with anger. "I'm so sorry I let you all down." she screamed.

"Baby, you didn't let anyone down." he said softly, stroking her cheek gently.

"I'm an addict, Ken. Look at me!" she yelled, her voice breaking through her tears.

"I am, Lexi. I am." he said, grabbing her shoulders. "You're a recovering addict. They would be so proud of you for the help you got and how far you've came over this past year."

"I should have never touched those pills. They should still be here, with me!" she yelled, the tears spilling over once more.

"Baby, I know. I know." he said, bringing her close once more.

"It's just not fair." she whispered, her shoulders shaking.

"I know, sweetie." he said, as he placed a soft kiss on her forehead.

"Ken, I'm sorry." she said softly.

"Baby, it's alright. It's alright, okay? Look at me." he said, cupping her face in his hands, as she looked up at him. "Nothing I say, or nothing that anyone says for that matter is going to take this pain away. It will get better, but right now, you've just started dealing with it. You're in the grief, honey. You're just not calling it what it is. Do you think they wanted to leave you? They didn't know. And you coped with it the only way you knew how to. Deep down, I know they understand that and they are proud of their daughter. You got the help you needed and they would be proud of that. They are proud of that. I know they are."

"I know." she whispered, looking at the marker once more. "Can you just give me a minute alone?" she asked, looking at him as she wiped the fresh set of tears from her eyes.

"Yeah, I'll be in the car when you're ready." he said, as he helped her stand on her feet once more. "I love you."

"I love you, too." she said, managing a weak smile.

Ken smiled in return before turning around and making his way back to the car. Lexi sighed deeply before turning back to the marker. A fresh set of tears sprung to her eyes, as she made her way to the large stone and knelt beside of it. She traced her finger over the bubbled picture and closed her eyes.

"I've only ever wanted to make you proud. I'm sorry for the way my life has turned out over this past year, but I coped with it the way I thought was right. I tried masking the pain and no matter how high I got, it was still there in the end." she stopped, as she sniffled, but managed to continue pouring her heart out.

"I know you would at least be happy, Mom, that Ken and I ended up together. You always said we would and I remember you saying how good he would be for me. You we're right. You and dad were always right." she whispered, as she smiled for the first time, before she wiped the last few tears from her cheeks.

"I promise to make you proud and to never do drugs again. I never thought it was possible to have a life after the accident, but slowly, I'm learning that even though I miss you guys and I will until the day I die, I can be happy and have a life. A piece of me will always be missing and I will carrying you with me the entire way." she said as she stood and looked up at the cloudy sky.

"I love you guys." she whispered, as she kissed the tip of her fingers before touching the picture once more.

Finally feeling like everything was off her chest, she turned and headed back towards the car where Ken was waiting. As she slipped into the passenger seat, she smiled at him and grabbed his hand.

"I'm sorry I've been a royal bitch towards you here lately." she said, frowning.

"It's alright, baby. I know you've had a lot on your mind. I'm not going anywhere. I promise." he said, as she stroked her cheek gently.

"I know." she said, shaking her head. "I love you."

"I love you, too, Lex." he whispered, as he leaned over and brushed his lips against hers gently. "Forever."

"And always." she said, smiling, as she kissed him gently once more.

"Do you always have to get the last word in?" he laughed, as he started the car.

"I wonder where I get that from?" she retorted, smirking in his direction.

"I have no idea." he said, innocently.

"Oh, I wonder!" she said, smiling to herself.

"Where?" he asked, giving her a sideways glance.

"Mrrrrrrr. Kennnneddddyyyyy." she bellowed, before erupting into a fit of giggles.

"Oh, I'm so gonna get you for that one." he said, smirking at her.