Corrupted the Blind

Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha.

15.06.2010: This chapter has been re-edited and title of story changed from 'Ancient Feelings'.

"Rin, say something," Lady Caroline coaxed, frustrated that she didn't know what was in the young girl's mind. She'd been so quiet during their talks that they'd thought she was asleep.

They heard a sigh. "I don't know what to think…" It was understandable. She was without memory of recent events, and yet they were all speaking about things she did not want to know.

"Then you should get out of here. If not us, at least you," Audrey said, convinced that if they said Naraku's time enough times, they would have his attention, and that way Rin could be set free.

"Naraku!" Audrey shouted, her voice echoing between the walls. "Naraku, you bastard!"

"Audrey, what are you doing?" Kaede asked desperately, knowing that every time they said his name he would be aware of it and perhaps come. It was why they'd chosen to call him Caveman instead.

"Let him come. Naraku, if you're not a coward, come here!"

In a minute, a binding light showed the man they feared most.

"What do you think you're doing?" he asked with narrow eyes, his rage clear on his features. "Are you eager for a little torture?"

"Get her out of here," Audrey said, pointing at Rin and frowning, as if she couldn't stand her. She had to play her part well. "She's annoying. Get her out! It's you fault, your damn fault."

The others had to admit that she was a good actress.

"What are you talking about?" He was returning her glare heatedly.

"Rin! She can't remember! I don't know what the fuck you did to her, but she cannot remember! It's your fault, with that stupid food you gave us. You poisoned it!" He had, he remembered, but why would it only work on Rin?

"You expect me to fall for your trick again? Why would she forget and not you?" he asked cautiously, waiting to see if she could come up with a reasonable explanation.

"Because we didn't eat the damn food! We gave the whole thing to Rin."

Naraku stood there, looking at her, unimpressed. Raising an eyebrow, he released Rin's chains and dragged her upstairs. In the dungeon, the women prayed she would be set free.

As soon as they got in his office, Naraku went directly to the truth potion.

"Let's not waste time," he said, noticing Rin's emotionless eyes. "Drink this." She did.

"Do you remember anything?" he asked, a little pissed at the whole situation.

"What should I remember?" She was confused, that was not a very concrete question.

"Do you remember Kagome and Inuyasha?" he settled for asking.

"Yes." He frowned.

"What do you remember about them?"

Rin struggled to recall their relationship. "Last time I saw them, they were on a trip to some old castles up north – he wanted to show her where he lived as a child. They still aren't ready for a baby, or so they told me."

Naraku's eyes widened slightly. So the potion had worked. It was… interesting. If he could get the others to forget as well, it would be fantastic. This last potion he'd worked for so long on was an improved version of all the others; this one was permanent, too. All the others faded in a while, but this one didn't. This potion was strong and persistent.

"Do you know who I am?"

She shook her head.

"Have we met?" he asked her and witnessed as she once again shook her head.

"Very well," he said, deciding to release her. After all, it would be a nuisance to keep her imprisoned still, especially if the others were irked that she couldn't remember anything. "You can leave."

He was fine. Everything was fine. He was fine.

Maybe, Inuyasha told himself, maybe if he'd keep telling himself that he'd believe it. So he was fine.

He frowned as the reminder of the previous day washed over him unasked for. His hands trembled slightly and he was past denying himself. Yura hadn't undone a thing; she hadn't helped him forget. It was still on the tip of his tongue, in his mind, his memory. Maybe if Kagome hadn't lost her memory, if she hadn't appeared so innocent and so fragile, and maybe if he hadn't remembered the consuming need to protect her, his heart would be safe.

It was no use. If things kept going like this he wouldn't be able to hurt her. She wasn't evil anymore; she wasn't unfaithful.

Inuyasha shook his head, his own thoughts sounding too offending. Treacherous. No, he thought, subconsciously driving his forehead into the bark of the tree he was leaning against – he couldn't even feel the pain. No, he would not feel pity. No pity.

Not for her.

For hours he'd wandered aimlessly; he hadn't been able to close an eye all night long, the smell of his activity with Yura only aggravating him. For the first time in a long time he broke down and cried, his head still hitting the trunk, his heart still aching. He wished things could have been different. He wished she could have been different.

At the beginning Kagome had been his very dream, yet… she'd transformed. The reason or circumstances were still a mystery to him, but he wasn't going to analyze it anymore. He'd got past that.

She still needed to be hurt. Even if it killed him, he had to bring her down.

Soon he was dizzy, but didn't care. His vision was hazy and it was getting so hot, so hard to speak, to form coherent thought. They blistered, the memories. They kept coming and going on a whim, never asking his permission, never sympathetic, never considerate. When he started believing he couldn't do this anymore, he pounded his head on the tree once again, as if a dark presence, something that came from within was guiding his body.

He didn't care anymore, because the pain felt so good and new that it extinguished every other sense. He couldn't hear anything around him – the wind that should have rustled between the tree leaves was so quiet, the river close by so still. The scent of nature was inexistent in his nostrils, as if he'd lost his grasp on the world.

It was only very, very hot. Blazing. A hell of sorts.

The fact that he was crying registered eventually and he wrestled with himself, trying to stifle the sounds.

In a world so silent, his sobs were deafening.

He collapsed in a smooth motion, blood running down his forehead – a miracle that he was still alive. He'd done this to himself and he'd do far worse, but first he wanted to watch Kagome suffer. He didn't know if it would help soothe his pain or if it would make him feel better, but at least she deserved it. All the nights he hadn't slept, all the days he'd simply sat there, on his bed, heartbroken, she should pay for those.

Groaning with difficulty, he turned around to have the bark support his back. Slowly, he rubbed his head with his head, not knowing what more he could do. When his arm started aching, he dropped it to the ground beside him, noticing there was blood on his palm.

His blood.

He remembered that day as well, the most dreadful betrayal of all.

It still hurt to think about it.

He grumbled something to himself and opened his eyes heavily, trying to see in the darkness enveloping him. The sharp laughter he'd become so accustomed to recently mocked him from everywhere around him. It climbed the walls, jumped on the floor, the vibrations sending echoing shivers throughout his body. He couldn't stand this anymore.

"So you thought I wasn't going to keep my promise, right?" she chuckled lowly, showing him she was every bit the bitch she herself claimed she was.

"Kagome," he managed weakly, trying to forget the ways he'd once said her name, how sweet it had tasted on his tongue. "I understand things have changed," no, in fact he didn't, he couldn't, but he'd let it go, "but I… why can't you at least act normal?"

Normal was not in her vocabulary anymore.

"You're such a whiny puppy," she teased sarcastically and he snorted in frustration. Everything he said she turned against him.

"I don't know where my Kagome went, but that's not you," he spat venomously, refusing to meet her eyes. It was hard to in that darkness, anyway.

"I don't know what you're talking about," she pretended, apparently innocently, though that word was not in her vocabulary anymore, either.

"Why don't you get over with this shit, huh?" he challenged, pulling on the sleeves of the coat that was stuck to the tree behind him by two arrows. "Why don't you kill me?" He wanted to die.

"I will," she assured him. "But first I'll tell you what I've been doing."

He knew. He knew and didn't want to hear, but she said it anyway. "I've been fucking your best friends. All of them. I took them by turns. I fucked other men, too. Many at a time, as well. Do you want to hear who I've been fucking most?" He closed his eyes painfully, tears leaking from the corners. No, he did not. "You thought we were friends, didn't you?" she snorted sarcastically, pitying his gullible nature. "Naraku. I fucked him."

He'd known. He'd known all along but acted as if he hadn't, because he'd hoped that she'd change, that he'd be enough to make her change. So while she kept sleeping around, she came back to him, and slept with him, and he didn't stop her. Until a random day when he found her – yet again – with a man, he didn't stop her.

Kagome's gaze hardened and she took another arrow, preparing to let it fly towards his heart. "Now I'll kill you," she declared and he swallowed thickly, awaiting his death… that never came. Kagome was promptly pushed to the side by Yura, who made sure to leave her unconscious, as well. Concerned, Inuyasha's savior came to inspect his wounds. Releasing him of the arrows, she breathed out in relief.

Inuyasha looked down at Yura; he'd slept with her over the last year, had tried to show Kagome he could do the same thing, but it wasn't the same. It wasn't pleasure to him, it was pain. And he followed her from that day, not knowing he was going to bring her pain, too.

Next to her wrongdoings, his intentions were tame, his thoughts pure.

Movement in the bushes around him made Inuyasha flinch instinctively, but a person he'd least expected regarded him curiously. Rin was quiet, looking at him as if she'd never seen him before.

"What are you doing here?" he asked weakly, forgetting the blood on his face. She didn't answer. Instead, she looked down at her own attire – it was dirtier than Inuyasha had ever seen it; she looked and even smelled – he realized – as if she hadn't bathed in a long time. Unexpectedly, she tore a part of her dress where the hem was already torn and ran from his sight. Confused, Inuyasha realized he couldn't afford to keep wondering about her, because he was struggling to stay conscious.

But now that he thought about it, he hadn't seen Kagome's former friends, Lady Caroline, Audrey, Rin and Kaede, in a while.

Then something strange, but familiar happened. As if he was being surrounded, controlled, even, by another presence. It was daunting and it made him want to think of revenge, so he let it linger. It could be his consciousness warning him about his own weakness.

To his surprise, Rin returned, and he found himself amazed by the sudden rush of emotions – mainly an odd confusion – that he felt at that moment. When she sat on her knees next to him and wiped his face clean with the wet rag, he was stunned. She was acting so strange.

"Why are you doing this?" he asked, his voice a lot rougher than he'd ever heard it. He almost wondered if it was his own.

The girl still didn't reply and left again instead.

Inuyasha didn't have long to wonder about what had happened, because the pain in his head was too great, too pulsing, that he had to concentrate on it fully, but Rin came back with a roasted fish a while later.

He raised an eyebrow when she held it out for him to take.

"I'm not hungry," he said, but she left it at his side. "Rin, what's wrong?" he asked, confused by her behavior and the new feelings he was experiencing. There was something deep inside him, something that surged forward, wanting to protect this girl.

"I'll follow you," she said so softly that he almost missed it.

"What?"

"I'll follow you. You're the first person I see after…" she trailed off and shook her head, chasing her thoughts away. "So I'll follow you."

"Rin." He coughed loudly, tried to sit up. "Do you remember who I am?"

She nodded her head simply. These people kept asking her what she remembered.

"Good," because he'd thought otherwise.

For a moment, she wondered if she should tell him the stories she'd heard about him and Kagome, but decided against it. In his state, it could only trouble him.

"Go home," he told her. When she wanted to protest, he said harshly, "Go home, Rin. I'll visit you some time. Go." Reluctantly, she did as told.

"Here's your soup sweetheart," the loving wife said, kissing Miroku on his forehead. Putting the tray on his lap, she climbed on the bed next to him, rubbing his forehead. "How's your cold?"

"I'm better," he replied with a smile. "Thanks to you."

She smiled back. "Kagome said you don't have to worry about not working for a while. Take your time to get better."

"Is the soup with no salt?" he asked, his eyes glinting strangely. His wife chuckled.

"You're not getting out of this, sweetie. I remember how Kaede used to tell you to eat without salt for your heart. I don't know if she's right, but it's worth a try." Her smile grew bigger at the sight of his childish frown.

"Fine. I haven't eaten salt for a while and I'll keep doing it until we see some results."

Nodding approvingly, Sango kissed his cheek and retreated out of the room.

For a few days Inuyasha just lay there on the ground, his back leaning on the tree, his thoughts astray. From time to time Rin came and brought him food and water, which confused him immensely. And every time he felt that same strange presence in his mind that had been plaguing his thoughts recently. It was darkening his conscience and he couldn't say he was aware of what he should be doing. He knew he had to get back to Kagome, to strengthen their 'bond' so she wouldn't suspect anything, but he was just too weak.

Rin came again.

"Potatoes this time," she announced and held out a place for him to take. Frowning, he shook his head.

"Not today, Rin," he said, struggling to get up and she frowned. When she put the plate on the ground to help him, he held out a hand to stop her.

"I'll do it myself." As soon as he was standing, he shook his legs slightly to get used to the feeling then slowly walked back home, ignoring the girl that was still standing, still looking at him from behind.

As soon as he entered the house, Yura rose from her chair to greet him, frantic already.

"I've been looking for you everywhere," she said, her desperation showing on her face.

"Leave me alone," he grunted. Quickly, he washed himself and got dressed elegantly, leaving her without words.

Miroku stood on the bed facing the ceiling, his eyes wide and his breath speedy. He'd been dizzy these last days and weird flashes had kept bothering him. It was as if he was daydreaming, but the images he was seeing were so clear and real, as if they were memories.

He was seeing situations with him, with Sango, Kagome and Inuyasha, even Naraku.

Naraku and Tsubaki.

His breath stopped short and he sat up swiftly, his mouth half open.

Naraku! He was the one guilty for everything! He remembered!

His heart beating so erratically that he thought he was going to die, Miroku called for his wife desperately, too weak to get out of bed.

"Sango!"

Naraku had tricked Inuyasha, he'd tricked Kagome too. He and Tsubaki were not her friends – they were simply trying to hurt her. Miroku remembered witnessing Kagome's escapades, remembered being confused about it. And how he'd learned about Naraku. Just as he had been on the verge of telling Inuyasha, something had happened.

That he couldn't remember.

Which had to be Naraku's interference, as well. He didn't remember, Sango didn't remember, Kagome didn't remember anything, either. It was too much of a coincidence; it had to do with that bastard! The lies, the horror, all the lost years. And Kaede, and Lady Caroline… Eveline, Audrey, they knew, too. He'd talked to them and had decided to break it to Kagome and Inuyasha together.

But they hadn't had the chance.

Grudgingly, he remembered that one day after his hazy memory loss Lady Caroline visited him, talking about some plan of theirs. When he'd been confused, she'd seemed tragically upset and had left.

Now he understood… and hadn't seen her in a long time, either.

Naraku must have done something to her. To Kaede, to Audrey… to Eveline… did Rin know, too?

How were they going to get out of this mess?

Miroku called once more and immediately his wife appeared.

Kagome had decided to tell Tsubaki the news about her lover. For a few days Inuyasha hadn't come, but Sango suggested that perhaps he had some urgent things to do. Kagome trusted him to come back to her.

Truthfully, she missed him. It had only been a few days but it already felt like too long, and she was desperate to feel him next to her again.

And she felt alone. Tsubaki hadn't come and Naraku had only visited her once since she and Inuyasha had made this step, but for some reason she hadn't told him anything. It had been a short visit, after all.

"Come in," the servant with the moustache said politely, smiling quite disturbingly, but Kagome was already used to his ever-naughty behavior. If she put aside his weird jokes, he was quite a funny and interesting man. After all, Naraku had spoken highly about him.

"My Lady is going to come down in a minute," he said, guiding her to the sofa. Smiling softly, Kagome thanked him for the assistance and waited for Tsubaki to come.

When she did, her smile was great.

"Kagome, my dear," the woman said. "You are gorgeous and shining!"

"I am?" the woman asked with a blush, remembering the reasons why she was so happy.

"You are, my dear. Has something happened in my absence?" Tsubaki was smiling deliberately, as if she already knew. Kagome wondered how it was that this woman always noticed everything.

"Yes, it has," Kagome answered sincerely, pausing just slightly to organize her thoughts. "I met someone. His name is Inuyasha Taisho and he's the greatest man." Her eyes sparkled with the adoration she felt and Tsubaki noticed it. So Naraku's plan was working.

"I'm so glad for you honey," she answered slyly, really content that things were going their way.

"And we've also… been together," Kagome added shyly, wondering if Tsubaki would understand what she meant.

The woman's eyes widened in pretense. "Oh?"

"Yes, he's… he was... perfect." The satisfied smile playing on Kagome's lips told Tsubaki that the girl was hopeless now.

"That's good to hear, great to hear, darling. Your husband isn't worth the wait – I'm sure he won't ever return." Kagome thought so, too.

"But I wanted to tell you about something else." Something that had kept bothering her. Tsubaki nodded as if to coax Kagome into continuing. "I've kept seeing Yura lately, in my dreams, in the mirror, even. It's pretty odd, but I'm sure it's a sign that I should talk to her. Haven't seen her in a long time, after all."

Tsubaki pursed her lips in frustration – what was she to tell her now? What would Naraku want her to say?

"Do you have any idea where she lives?" Kagome asked.

"No, I-"

"I do," the servant with the moustache interrupted, smiling intentionally. "I know where Miss Yura lives now. She has moved from her old house." A swift frown settled on his features, but it disappeared just as quickly that no one in the room noticed.

"Will you tell me?" Kagome asked with a smile, triggering a grin from the man.

Yura stood gaping at the doorway, unable to believe her eyes.

"Well?" Kagome asked with a smile, realizing that while they hadn't seen each other for so long, Yura shouldn't look so surprised. Initiating the contact, Kagome hugged her warmly, glad to be able to talk to someone she did remember.

"Ka-Kagome?"

Yura's strangled voice brought a frown to Kagome's eyebrows, but she smiled nonetheless.

"I know I haven't visited in a long time, but I thought we should talk."

Confused by Kagome's odd behavior, Yura nodded unconsciously.

"Can I come in?" Kagome asked and Yura stepped from the doorway and gestured inside.

"Look," Kagome said with a sigh, "before we talk more I should mention that I lost my memory of recent years." There was a gasp coming from Yura. "So I don't really remember my life. They told me I had a husband and friends, but the only friend I do remember is you."

Yura was astonished. Kagome didn't remember so many years… but she remembered the time they had been friends, so, so long ago! Suddenly she felt guilty for taking Inuyasha away from her. She felt guilty for ruining her life, for being the reason to all of her plights.

The only comfort she could bring was to become Kagome's friend, but she had to keep it from Inuyasha.

Fortunately, Inuyasha had just left before Kagome had arrived. Yura had to make sure to tell Kagome that she would be the one to visit her from now one, so Inuyasha's presence could be avoided.

"What happened to your house?" Kagome asked, looking around at the modesty in which Yura lived. She noticed a man's trousers lying on the armchair. "Are you living with someone?"

"I am," Yura nodded.

"Well," Kagome said with a smile, "when will I meet him?"

Gulping, Yura shrugged. "He's gone an awful lot, but I'll make sure to ask you to come by when he's at home."

"I'm with someone, too," Kagome said. "His name is Taisho, do you know him?"

Yura shook her head; hadn't heard that name anywhere.

"He's amazing," Kagome added with a dreamy smile and Yura smiled as well, hiding the misery she felt. Her insides were twisting and churning as she became more aware that she had destroyed a happy family. Now Kagome was content with someone else, someone that wasn't Inuyasha, while he was still miserable.

How she hated herself…

Her thoughts overwhelmed her so strongly that she almost missed Kagome's words.

"Do you remember…"

Kagome returned home only to be told that Inuyasha was waiting for her in the garden and that 'she knew where to find him'. In a heartbeat she was by his side, hugging him warmly and letting her lips ravaged by his passion. She'd missed him so much, so much; she never wanted them to be apart again.

"Where have you been?" She looked into his eyes, hoping to find all the answers there.

"I almost lost some lands, so I had to leave urgently. I'm sorry I didn't get to tell you. I promise it won't happen again." He sounded so sincere and regretful that Kagome felt the urge to kiss him again to soothe him.

"I missed you," she told him wholeheartedly and he smiled deliberately.

"I did, too. I missed you so much." Following his tactics, he buried his nose into her hair, telling her how good she smelt, how much he loved her. How amazing it was that she was his.

"Only yours," she replied with a satisfied and excited smile, she was forever his.

They cuddled on the bench, kissed, and watched the beauty of the garden together, sharing something sacred, something Kagome never wanted to lose.

"How is your husband?" he asked cautiously, watching her every gesture. She began biting her lips in nervousness, looking away from him.

"He's… fine. Ill and…"

His snort interrupted her.

"Why can't you just tell me?" he asked heatedly, frowning down at her.

"What do you mean?" Kagome asked in confusion, alarmed by his angry behavior. She didn't know it was all a pretense.

"That you can't remember," he answered and ignored her gasp. "Why don't you trust me?"

Tears immediately sprung to her eyes, frustration crawling into every bone in her body. How did he know? It hurt, it hurt so much – did he not want her anymore? Now that he knew, would he leave her? Was that why he'd been absent for so long?

"I want you to trust me, Kagome," he said softly, noticing her sadness. "I wanted you to tell me, I hoped you would."

He stroked her hair gently, kissing her temple, using his experience and knowledge of her body to soothe her. Instantly, she relaxed in his arms.

"I've known for some time," he admitted, "the servants warned me. I thought you'd tell me."

She'd been ashamed. She hadn't wanted him to find out how helpless she was, how she didn't remember much of her own life.

"So you know my husband left me?" He simply nodded in reply.

"Oh God," she said against his shoulder, her words muffled by his clothes. "I must seem so pathetic."

"No," he said, taking her head to cradle it in his palms. "You're not pathetic." His smile appeared slyly, making butterflies grow heatedly in her stomach. "You're beautiful. There's a difference."

Her kiss took him by surprise.