Months passed. Abraham left the Hellsing estate and returned with a new title, as the leader of an official, secret anti-vampire force funded directly by the Crown. More time passed and the organization formed, its base a body of vampire oriented individuals with the desire to rid England and the world of the inhuman monsters. Abraham was supplied with arms by the Queen and an ever-growing population of victims from vampire attacks.
Deaths among his men would remind him of the presence of the vampire in his dungeons, but the dire need for the beast never arose in his mind.
On the anniversary of the vampire's return to the cell, Abraham stumbled upon the journal. Setting down a glass of red wine, Abraham blew off the thin layer of dust that whitened the dark leather. The library was currently under construction and he was taking this time to sort through which volumes he still thought to be useful and which could be discarded or distributed amongst his men.
He opened it and was surprised by the leaflets of paper that fell out, bearing Jonathon's handwriting. He hadn't seen his friend but perhaps once after his marriage. He was expecting his first born in a matter of weeks. Some undesirable memories coupled with a few pleasant ones flooded his mind and he began to read the journal without further thought. Anything to discourage the recollection of the collapse of his family…his son's death…his wife's unfortunate insanity….
When you're trying to color in a circle
On a black surface
And your hand is in the light's path
You cannot tell how much of the circle
Is actually colored
In life
We try to do good
Or at least make our lives significant
But you cannot see the progress you have made until
You have removed your life from this world
Only when you move your hand and allow the light to illuminate the ink
May you see how much of the circle
You have actually colored
******
A whisper is calling
It is crying
Laughing
And singing
But it is screaming
And echoing
In my hollow soul
Heaven
Hell
Do not tell
Wake
Take the morning
Gnawing
Are the eternities before you
But no angel will ever go to you
Inquiring your thoughts and preparations for it
But your angel
May ask you
Of what you have given Life
Live for Life
And you will see
Your time
With God
*****
Look at me
Unlikely
Let me hide
I will not seek you
Who am I
I wouldn't care
Why is it cold
What do you mean
Why does it burn
You make no sense
Why do you mean so much
You are a fool
I do not feel but I feel
You should not speak
Then…no I am afraid
How so
Of losing
But you have nothing
No
What were you going to say
Then why do you respond
Why
I was afraid that you…
You were afraid of losing me
Yes
You actually want my harsh words
Undoubtedly
You make no sense
For there is none behind it
You really are a fool
No I am not
Of course you're not
No I am not
What are you then
I am human
So am I
And that is why I cannot lose you
But I can lose you
Because you do not feel the need
Now I will leave
It will kill me
It won't be on my hands
But your cause
Leave me alone
Now I have a presence
What
Now I exist
You are mad
I wasn't a part of anything
Leave
Now I have something
You don't possess me
Nor do I wish too
I can't understand
You gave me a memory of care
But I don't care for you
You responded and I was not alone
Stop
Why do you fear
I am not afraid of you
You fear my words
They are unpleasant
Then you taste my pain
Abraham closed the journal slowly, having forgotten the reason why he had chosen to read it. Forgetting the glass of wine and the remaining books he had to shift through, he went to bed…drowning in his guilt.
****
Abraham bowed before the throne occupied by a woman whose face was obscured by shadows.
"It is an honor to be in your presence once more."
The Queen nodded in approval and Hellsing straightened.
"What is the current state of your practice?"
Abraham looked into the face of the shadow as he recalled the number of vampires eradicated in the past months and the number of men lost during the ordeal along with the number of civilian victims. These were acknowledged with grim satisfaction by the shadow. After addressing the supplies needed for the next six months and future plans for expansion, Abraham sighed and unwillingly brought up his next topic.
"Do you recollect the specific vampire who initially brought me to your attention?" He waited through her moment of surprise.
"Yes, Hellsing. Count Dracula, the No-Life-King." Her hand was not cloaked in the darkness, so Abraham observed as it closed into a fist. "You said you captured him. He is dead, correct?"
Abraham blinked, and his mouth opened for a moment. "I captured him and sealed him, as I said before, but I bring him up now as I believe he can be used to cut the number of human lives lost during these hunts…in half if not more."
"Hellsing. Count Dracula is alive?" her voice was hard, but did not contain any signs of anger.
"Yes." He was about to continue but her next question did not wait for him.
"Where is he?"
"At the Hellsing estate."
There was silence.
"Why has this not been mentioned before?" her demand was calm but edged with an unpleasant sharpness.
"After his capture, I sealed him…I bound him with magic that took away his freedom. He is bound to me and my will." The shadow was quiet and, unable to see her expression, Abraham couldn't tell if she approved or believed in the mention of magic. "The spell disrupted his mind and took his memories."
"How can you know this?" the figure on the throne seemed stiffer than before.
"The bond. I know if he is lying…if I order him to do something he cannot go against it. He feels pain if he does not obey, and the capability of the seal was briefly tested before I removed him to the dungeon beneath Hellsing."
"Have you been using my funds for this?"
Abraham shook his head as he answered, afraid that this might come up. "No. All of this took place before my first meeting with you about the founding of the Hellsing organization."
There was a pause. "Why would he be able to cut our losses?"
"He can easily…kill vampires, much more quickly and efficiently than human hunters can."
"You have seen this?"
"Myself and a fellow hunter who originally helped in the capture of the vampire Dracula went with the said vampire on one occasion. He killed the five vampires at the site before we could take a single shot."
"Why is he imprisoned? Why is he not being used if you are so confident in his ability?"
"Count Dracula had lost his memories, and this being so, he was not himself. He…" Abraham paused, taking a breath. "He did not resemble a vampire in nature so using him to hunt down his kind appeared to be a simple process. He had, in the time I spent observing him, never attacked a single human and since his capture he has yet to even show signs of attacking one." Abraham glanced over the memory of the vampire knocking him to the ground. "He was averted to blood and did not display signs of his evil persona."
"He was human?" the voice was gentle, making Abraham shiver slightly in the midst of his shock.
"No. He was a vampire, though he behaved in a manner unlike that of a vampire…comparable to a human. But this was not permanent. There were hints to his returning memories, but it was made clear when he was taken to hunt vampires. His character reemerged…as it did when he was exposed to blood, though it would immediately fade… He killed the vampires in a manner within his darker nature and when questioned he agreed that he would be likely to do so again in the future…claiming to enjoy it." Abraham stopped and looked up as he realized his gaze had moved to the floor. "Disturbed by this, I felt that it was best to lock him away, and two other hunters who, again, had helped me with the capture of the Count, agreed with the decision."
The Queen did not speak for some time.
"He fell completely into his past character?"
"Not entirely, but his progression with an observed loss of…timidness and…child-like characteristics suggested that he would soon." Abraham's eyes narrowed, angered by the affect the topic had on him.
"Child-like?" The Queen shifted on the throne.
"As he didn't have any memories." Abraham answered immediately.
There was another period of silence.
"How is he now?"
"Most probably reverted to being the Count."
"You don't know?" some mild disbelief fell into her tone.
"Checking on him would require rousing him from the comatose state he would have fallen into during the year he has not been fed. I wanted your approval to awaken him." Abraham inclined his head slightly.
The Queen stood, catching Abraham off guard and he took a step back before straightening his posture.
"You may, Abraham Van Hellsing. Awaken Count Dracula, assess his state of being…determine if he is capable of the position you suggest for him. If he is deemed acceptable, I will be his final judge before he is to be introduced into the Hellsing organization. But if he fails your expectations or mine…" there was quiet. "…I expect that you will fulfill your duty as a hunter, and you will kill him."
****
He had drawn the blood just outside the door. He wasn't sure why, though it could have been to escape the questioning from his men if they saw him with a glass of blood or perhaps it was curiosity…to see if it would draw a reaction from Alucard. He didn't feel a reaction through the bond.
The door creaked open slowly, having been neglected…without being oiled…under Abraham's specific orders. The same caretaker had been the one to open the door a year ago, and he watched his master enter the cell with rising anxiety, having seen the blood and the process of drawing it.
Abraham held the lantern before himself as he crossed the stone floor. He bit his tongue to smother a gasp. The vampire was sitting, leaned up against the wall, unmoved from the time he had last seen him. Alucard's hair hung before his face, a stark white contrast against the black of the uniform he still wore. He appeared to be a corpse and if not for the bond, Hellsing would have pronounced him deceased…beyond the state of being undead. He almost spoke, but realized he knew that Alucard wouldn't be able to hear him. He wouldn't be able to move. He may be awake…but his senses would have failed him…he was trapped within his mind.
The isolation made Abraham shudder though he fought it and the guilt that began to invade his heart. He knew how to wake him and he put the lantern on the floor.
Setting the glass down on the stone for a moment as he crouched before the corpse, Abraham took up the glass once more and brought it to the vampire, titling it until the blood met with his lips. He flinched when he realized that the liquid was being drawn into his mouth. Moments later, the vampire lost its corpse-like appearance, but he remained pathetically weak and his hair continued to be white in color.
Watching his blood disappear slowly, Abraham failed to realize that Alucard's eyes had opened until the glass was almost empty. He grew rigid as he looked at the eyes…both recognizing them and not recognizing them. Abraham set the glass on the ground but did not let go of it. He didn't move away from the vampire, still crouched beside him.
"Count."
"Abraham Van Hellsing."
