Disclaimer and Notages:
OMG! Flippin double digits! Huzzah! Quite frankly I'm surprised Randomness is still around but hey, it is. Sorry for such spread-apart updating, I'm rarely on fanfiction anymore in the first place. Which is too bad, because I like reading other parodies and stuff… That said, don't think I'm rude if I don't read and review your stuff. To tell the truth, the brightness bothers my eyes, so I rarely even look over my own stuff on here… Again, sorry I haven't updated for so long. I've been busier than I usually am lately…
So, thankies to all reviewees… because your reviews really mean a lot to me! Well… let's go!
(This chapter (and some to follow) were actually inspired by a dream I had XD)
Randomness- Chapter 10!
It was a cloudy day, and everyone was sad because there was no orange juice.
Ed: Man, I really want some 'flippin orange juice.
Havoc: Well go get some.
Ed: Well maybe I will.
Havoc: But where will you go…?
Al: Brother… you know there's only one place we can go…
: THE WALMART!
?Kefka, of course!
-scary music plays-
Kefka: Dundundun…!
Ed: Not THE WALMART!
Havoc: THE WALMART!
Kefka: Dundundun!
Ed: Nooooooo!
Havoc: Yes!
Kefka: Dundundun!
Havoc: Shuddup -.-
Kefka: Meh…
Ed: Well, fine then. I'll go and get everyone orange juice. Because I want some.
Havoc: Brave, brave soul…
And so Ed, being the brave, brave soul that he was, set off on the journey for the orange juice, willing to risk his life within the perilous walls of THE WALMART. And of course, Alphonse, Havoc, and Kefka came with, because it's more fun that way, of course!
And they all rode Chocobos, CUZ I SAID SO.
It was dangerous from the moment they arrived.
Ed: This… is chaos!
Alphonse: No! No! What… what kind of society would DO something like this?
Kefka: I know! Not a SINGLE one of those carts are in the cart return! –terrified look-
Havoc: I warned you…
Alphonse: Brother, are you sure we should be doing this?
Ed: -grim expression- A man's gotta do what a man's gotta do.
And so Ed boldly led his chocobo through the cart-filled wasteland that was THE WALMART parking lot. The others followed cautiously, cuz you never know when one of those carts is gonna come flyin outta nowhere and attack you.
Anyways, Ed finally found a clear spot, and tied his chocobo to the pole there. The others did likewise. They approached the building, over which a dark cloud loomed, emanating thunder and lightning. The building itself was… GIGANTINORMOUS, LYK ONG.
Havoc: You sure about this?
Ed: It's not about you or me. It's about the orange juice. That's all that matters.
Havoc: Way to go, kid, way to go.
And so… they dared- they entered THE WALMART.
Kefka: Dundundun!
Havoc: -glare-
: WELCOME TO THE WALMART!
: KNIVES
KNIVES: -basically attacks them with a cart-
Ed: -recognizes him- Hey… I thought you died in the very first chapter?
KNIVES: Oh, yeah, that… Well, I did. But this dude named Hojo, well, he was drinking this Dr. Pepper slushie, and like, a piece of my finger clogged up the straw, and so he, like, tried to… recreate me, I guess. Mad scientist stuff and all that.
Group: -blank stare-
KNIVES: Yeah… Anyways, welcome to Hel- I mean, THE WALMART.
Ed: Yeah…
THE WALMART stretched before them endlessly, like a field full of radioactive corn muffins.
Ed: So… Where's the orange juice in all this?
Havoc: All part of the chaos that is THE WALMART….
Alphonse: Do they sell maps of the store? Cuz I think that we may end up in another country if we don't be careful.
Ed: We'll just have to look…
And so the crew set out on the search for the orange juice. Which seemed almost impossible to find. Kefka was endlessly reading those signs that hang at the end of aisles to tell their contents.
Kefka: Board games, pots and pans, toe nail polish, DVDs, butter, ice cream, whipped cream, lingerie, pasta, unhealthy preservative filled foods…
Ed: Uggh. I'm getting tired of even looking.
Havoc: So am I #.#
Kefka: Idea!
Ed: Huh?
Kefka: -points to an aisle of bicycles-
Havoc: I hate bikes.
Kefka: There're scooters, too!
And so Ed and Al took bikes for store transportation, and Havoc took a scooter. And Kefka took one of those oversized balls that you can jump around on, cuz they were there to and are AWESOMELY AWESOME.
And so it ends for now… I'll update again as soon as I write more, I just wanted to give you what I had so far.
Until then, you should check out Mirror of Torment by Rots. It's awesome as well!