February 26th, 2018

So, I ended Friday's entry on a bit of an… unfortunate and unintentional cliffhanger. However, upon reflection, I could not continue without talking about the events in yesterday's entry. And thus I've truly messed with the chronology of this entire project even more than I already had, but I suppose it will have to do. These last few pages will cover the most recent chapter of my life. Moreso… how my life is the way it is now. And, thankfully, I have almost nothing but positive things to say from here on out. I am happy now. Believe me. Truly and utterly overjoyed with the way my life has turned out. Allow me to explain why.

Emptying that bottle had quite the adverse side effects, obviously. Fortunately I was in no mortal danger, but it seems I did experience a blackout, as well as another bout of memory loss. The immediate effects were rather severe, actually. I had lost much of my spatial awareness, entirely unsure of where I was at the moment, and I panicked. I retreated to the home I knew, that being Michael's old place, now cold, dusty and dormant after years of neglect, and once again I had nobody to turn to. Nero had disappeared on me again, and Dot - ...Oh, poor Dot was simply terrified. I had no idea at the time… her mother simply walked out in a fit, unsure of where she was or what she was doing…

I've been over this in the past, but still it haunts me. I'm simply… grateful everything turned out okay in the end. I spent what must have been more than a week in that manor. Sleeping in the shivering cold. Mind you, this was merely days before Christmas as well. Such an awful time to be in such a state, but here I was… Alone, afraid and without a clue. And so I… took an initiative. With the holidays just around the corner, perhaps I could take advantage of the situation and apply my services elsewhere to take the workload that comes with the holidays off of someone else. I put up a listing online via a computer at the Snowpoint library and… much to my surprise, within hours I received a call. His name was William, an incredibly wealthy pokemon trainer from all the way out in Johto. An entirely different region. I didn't think my resumé was that impressive. Nevertheless, he had the means of travel and could bring me there in a flash. To my understanding he had a very large home, and could use plenty of extra help. Of course I was happy to oblige, especially after being told my pay and… I was off to Johto in an instant.

I should add that William is also an incredibly powerful psychic, so much so that he's a member of what I believe is called by interested trainers the "elite four," and as such, all manner of fancy tricks such as mind reading, manipulation and teleportation are second nature to him. Hence why I arrived so quickly. And goodness me, he was not exaggerating in regards to the sheer size and scope of his home. It positively dwarfed Michael's residence, made up of four massive floors. I'll spare you the full layout of the home, as at times even now I lose myself in its many rooms in hallways. I could write an entire entry on the floor plan alone, not to even mention the gardens and the pool house. So we'll skip that. That said, from the moment I saw it, I recognized how beautiful it was. The stonework on the exterior is positively exquisite, with the interior like that of a massive lodge. Every room has such personality to it. But again, passing on by that, I certainly had my work cut out for me. I settled into my work rather quickly, still entirely unaware of the things I had left behind. This was the first time I had suffered from such a complete form of amnesia. Usually the details always trickled back to me but… I had genuinely forgotten my home, my family, my mate. All of it.

Now, this is when things get rather complicated, so bear with me. You see, there's a very good reason Master William (and I assure you, I have absolutely no second thoughts referring to him as such) resides in relative seclusion, or at least there was for a very long time. At first I thought he had a sort of split personality, but it was soon explained to me that he in fact was… possessed. By a demon no less. I had seen and heard my fair share of tales in my life, so I didn't question it at first, even if I didn't entirely believe it. But sure enough, when said demon took over, Master William would go dormant for a few days, as Terror (mind you, this is the name he was given by William) would take over for the time being. The contrast in personalities was certainly something to behold at first. Master William is so gentle and eloquent, yet mysterious and captivating in the way he speaks. Meanwhile, Terror is quite the opposite. He's bold, he's crude, and I can assure you he possesses absolutely no filter. "Toots" is what he called me, long before I even gave him my name, though he already knew it apparently. Even when Terror wasn't in control of their collective body, it seemed he was listening. Anyway, he still calls me that, among other things. I'll… be sure to gush a little more later. I must say I rather liked it, much as I was taken aback by how impolite he was. I had never met someone who talked the way he did, with utter disregard for decency. And it was and still is incredibly charming.

Now with Terror in mind, I was… occasionally visited by males even still, this time of the Johto variety. It's funny how no matter where I go, no matter how isolated, they seem to come around regardless. But anyway. Mind you, I was at this moment in time, fully established in my role as the pretty little housekeeper, and happy to do it. In this environment I was definitely flirted with more than I had ever been before, and… what can I say? I enjoyed it quite a bit. Happy to oblige to a bit of playful fun. Sometimes it went a little further, but… much to my shock at the time, this greatly upset Terror, who was conversing with me more frequently as the weeks wore on. Master William even remarked that Terror was… incredibly difficult to keep dormant at the time. I soon figured out how smitten he was, as I would often find roses tucked away in various nooks around the manor. Though he never let down his incredibly brash demeanor, he certainly… softened to a degree whenever I was around.

That is, until Nero turned up. With Dot in tow, no less. He had tracked me down through a bit of digging and asking around Snowpoint. Mind you, this was well over a month later and I… I didn't recognize either of them even upon seeing their faces. Nothing quite clicked with me, not yet anyway. That said, Master William allowed them to stay at the manor for the time being as… Nero made efforts to have me remember him. In time this would prove fruitful but, I recognized what it did to Terror. He was very shut away and contentious during this period, and how could I blame him? Especially due to the fact that… at least in his own words, he had never fallen in love with someone before… me.

A-anyway, I… I eventually did - and I'm not sure if I had any residual help - but I did slowly but surely begin to recognize their faces. Dot's and Nero's, at least. It took weeks of prodding and… relearning about myself, hearing things I had supposedly never heard, but this instilled within me a very different change. My love for my daughter returned, but… my love for my mate did not. In remembering everything I had forgotten, I realized how… neglectful he was. And you might say, what neglectful mate would ever venture across regions to find their loved one? I honestly couldn't answer you that even now. But it wasn't a life I wanted to return to. I was so much happier there in that manor, with my newfound family. Master William and his dear sweetheart of a Typhlosion in Agnes, and of course Terror. I… I knew from that moment that's who I was in love with. I didn't see Nero as someone I loved. In fact, I think I lost that feeling in me years before. I just didn't know where else to go, or how to want something better for myself. Again, this… may certainly come off as selfish. But, I was truly unhappy up to that point in my life.

In what could only be described as a fit, Nero ran off as soon as I had announced my decision. Once again, I'll spare you the drama, but we worked things out, and Master William brought him home in time. Dot stayed with me at the manor where I could continue to raise her as I always had. Granted, the details were still quite fuzzy, and through Master William and Dot's help, it took me many months to regain most of what I know. I believe now, clarity isn't an issue, but this loss of memory was very long-lasting effect. So much so that… even now I can hardly remember so many once-familiar faces.

Again, I digress. Let me backpedal a bit more, and talk some more about Terror. There is still a… lot to say about Terror. In the confusion of… everything that happened regarding Nero, Terror thought I had chosen him. It's a bit complicated, but for a brief moment I did chase after him, if only to reassure him. As such, Terror closed himself off entirely, retreating into a dormant state through which I couldn't even talk to him. Master William and Agnes both assisted me in this regard, as I certainly had a lot to say now that I had made such a big decision. Through the mysticism that is Terror - remember, he is in fact a demon - there is a small vessel through which to contact him that Master William only refers to as the jade orb. Think a lightweight glass ball the size of a soccer ball. Jade in color, naturally. It's used as a means to talk to him, but also to tether him to whatever body he is currently possessing, unable to totally assume control, nor escape.

With a tap on the glass, I begged for him to come out so we could talk, and much to my surprise, this wasn't a very difficult thing to do, as inconsolable as he seemed. The very first thing I did was… confess my love to him. I had to let him know that he was in so many ways the sort of man I needed in my life. He was more than happy to return the sentiment and… well, it goes beyond that. Not days later, he asked me to marry him. Sudden, I know.

He said, he wanted to have me in his life forever, plain and simple. To never let me go. And, who am I kidding? I was happy. I didn't want to leave either, even if we had only known each other for a few months. There was and still is no place I'd rather be than here, in this manor. Living this life for the remainder of my days. And it would be nothing short of an adventure.

So naturally, with all this in mind, I said yes.

At face value, allow me to…. contextualize things for a moment. I was not in any sort of romantic love or affiliation with Master William, heavens no. That said, the being I was and am still in love with possessed a human body at this time. And as far as the both of us knew, that's just how it was always to be. I could only have Terror when he had control of that body. Terror was essentially imprisoned in Master William's body for deeds he had committed many years before. This was… certainly frustrating for the both of us, of course. But we were willing to make things work for one another. As such, intimacy is called into question, and I must say I see no… moral line being crossed as a result. I was never in love with a human. I was in love with Terror. And everyone else around us viewed the situation as the same. I can't deny the… awkwardness of it at first, long before he proposed, but I got over such notions as soon as he had done so. Keep this in mind as I explain what happened next.

So, Terror and I always took advantage of our limited time together whenever Master William allowed him such. I must add, I felt such a deep empathy for Master William, not being able to have full control of his body at all times. How awful that must feel. Always I tried to consider this even as I craved to be with the one I loved. But, again, it's just how things were. Never could the both of them be active and awake at the same time as the other. So, with that said… one of our nights together resulted in… pregnancy of all things.

Believe me, every last one of us were even more shocked than you might be in reading this. After all, even at that moment in time I believed - all of us believed I was simply a peculiarly-built Glaceon. Interbreeding with anything outside of a Glaceon's natural egg group seemed like an impossibility. And yet, here I was, expecting all over again. Questions were abound, but nevertheless, we simply accepted it. Mind you, Terror was much less calm than I was. And Master William, in all his great intelligence and wisdom was rather puzzled as well. So, he sought out his many connections, and found answers in the Aether Foundation. His first contact was Miss Wicke herself, and as it turns out, the Foundation knew a great deal more about me than even I did. So, even in the midst of my pregnancy, we planned a trip to Alola to get some answers.

Upon arrival, I was very surprised to be greeted with such a warm welcome, as if everyone there already knew me. The hospitality was incredible from the start, and it was incredibly apparent that I was not so peculiar a sight to the staff there. As Miss Wicke would soon inform myself and Master William directly, I was a product of a laboratory experiment. Back in 2010, the Aether Foundation conducted a sweep and retrieval of hundreds of Pokemon just like me who were in much more dire situations than I. The institution I was born from had filed for bankruptcy after many of its own staff were incriminated and arrested for various illegal activity regarding the… inhumanity of the experiments that went on at SIPR. I was in fact, one of the luckiest ones, it seems. Many of the pokemon living there at the time of the company's downfall were simply euthanized… It was such a dreadful tale. But in the process of their sweep, the Aether Foundation had recovered thousands of records, including my own regarding the success and failure of certain subjects. Mine was… not too terribly extensive, but I was rather shocked to learn all about my heritage as well as my genetics. To put it frankly I'm… in many ways as much a human - or more accurately a primate - as I am a Glaceon. Several hundreds of generations of selective breeding and genetic mutation for very specific traits is how I came to be. Hence why… well, my own options for interbreeding were vastly increased as a result. Thus… how Terror was able to impregnate me. I learned many other things, of course, up to and including what happened to my immediate biological family… how I have many more siblings still alive and living in homes across the world… How some of my own biological children, those I had but was never able to meet because of Michael… how they too were relocated and safe. Everything about my past was finally unraveled in these few days I spent with the Foundation.

It was a lot to take in, but in more ways than not, it was so very relieving. I finally understood who I was ten years on. I had never known, I had never been told, and all at once it was revealed to me, and everything finally made sense. And now, I couldn't be prouder with who I am.

A few weeks on… Otto, my youngest son was finally born. With no amount of exaggeration I can assure you he literally shone with beauty on that day, and continues to now. He's such a darling little Eevee, and I couldn't have been - I still can't be more proud to have him. And to call Terror his father.

Life continued as normal after all of this, of course. Aside from having another Eevee to raise, at this point it wasn't very difficult anyway. Dot was well matured, ready and willing to help me at any and every turn should I ask. She was turning into quite the little handywoman herself, learning to cook and clean with much the same dedication I had when I was her age. Not to mention the rest of the household, of course, all willing to take turns with Otto whenever I was busy with one thing or another. We were, and still are… family. All of us. Not just Terror, Dot, Otto and myself. All of us had become family by this point. And we only sought ways to make one another happy. Master William's way of doing so was finding an alternative for Terror and I, which I'll get into in just a moment.

Terror and I were married on the first day of July. Just this last year. I can't believe even in writing this that it hasn't been a full year. It already feels like we've been together for a small eternity.

The honeymoon was lengthy, of course. Master William was rather wealthy, and spared no expense in ensuring we had a lovely time together. And, as a bit of an additional gift and… well, bypassing the rules he had been given, Master William contacted Miss Wicke again, and together they made a plan to… genetically produce a vessel for Terror. His very own body. *(Miss Wicke, if you could be so kind - and I'm sure you're well aware, but as a simple precaution, please omit this paragraph and the next from the final, published form, thank you).

When I heard that this was possible, you can imagine how overwhelmed with joy I was. Once again I was brought to the Foundation, this time with the intent to… choose what form Terror would take. A pokemon form, this time. I think we could all agree that this was the best idea. And so, I was given a few options. Knowing Terror as I did and… well, I do have a rather fondness for other vulpine pokemon, I chose the body of a Zoroark for him. Mind you, throughout all of this, Terror was strictly unaware. Master William made every attempt to hide this plan from him until the time was right. The process was… well, far more complicated than I could ever hope to explain. I'm not too well-versed on scientific terminology, as it were. I couldn't hope to tell you how they did it, but they did it. A fully formed, fully functional Zoroark vessel was procured and, through the tether that is the jade orb, we were able to give Terror his own body. As I said before, I do love Master William, but I must say, Terror was and still is infinitely more handsome in this way. Mind you, still quite a lot larger than I. The process of teaching him to treat his new body with love and care was the first real struggle, but I like to think I'm awfully persuasive, and motivating at that.

That was only six months ago, mind you. Since then not much has changed. Life has been relatively relaxing and wonderful. Dot evolved into a Glaceon, just like her mother. Of course, I couldn't be more proud. And, well… Terror and I - we're so very happy together. I wish I could expound upon more details, but I think the sheer fact that I have little else to say is evidence of the peace and happiness in our lives now. It's more than I can say for any other point in my life. I feel utter tranquility, and no real regrets looking back.

Despite everything I've been through in my life, I don't wish any of it hadn't happened. If anything, all of these experiences were a learning process for me. I've grown in ways I can't even begin to describe. No matter where I once was before, I now live in a large manor with a dear friend in Master William as well as Agnes, my dear husband Terror, who never ceases to make my life a wonderful adventure, and of course my two beautiful children. And I suppose, where I am now is what matters most, is it not? I can't speak for the other memoirs that the other survivors will write. I don't know them. But know that this one, for all its many speed bumps, resulted in a happy ending. Of course, I can't speak for what lies ahead, but I have a very good feeling about it all. Something I can't say I've ever felt before.

So, I suppose that's all I have left to say. Miss Wicke, thank you for giving me the opportunity to say the things I needed to say. I've never really had the opportunity to share these things with anyone before, and… simply having the excuse and platform to do so has lifted an incredibly weight off of my shoulders, even if recounting these events has been rather troubling. I have many more years ahead of me yet, it seems, and perhaps one day, I'll be able to give another recounting, should my life evolve further. But for now, if you ever need me, inquire about the Glaceon maid living at the lone manor up beyond the Lake of Rage in Johto. I'm more than happy to talk to and share my story with anyone.

With love, Nanani