Cassy is five.
He was not supposed to be this nervous. It wasn't him starting school for the first time. So why was he shit scared?
Cassy on the other hand, was fine. Cassy seemed calm, if a little excited. But there was absolutely no trace of nerves at all. None. Nada. Zip. Zero. Which, when you thought about it, really wasn't fair. Because he wasn't going to get any sleep today while she was at school, then he would have to go to work tonight, and chances were Cassy would be fine.
But what if she wasn't?
What if she hated school? What if some of the older kids picked on her? What if she cried? The one thing he hated most of all was seeing her cry, and the older she became, the more he hated it. Or what if she struggled too much with the classwork? He'd always thought Cassy was smart and exceptionally bright for her age, but he was her dad, he was supposed to think that, right? What if she struggled so much that she was held back a year?
Calm down, Grissom told himself. She hasn't even gone for one day, and already you're holding her back.
"Daddy, look at my new shoes!" Cassy said proudly, pointing at her shiny, patent black school shoes. "And Halle put my hair up in a French braid see?"
"Beautiful," Grissom said, kissing the top of her head.
"Can I get my new bag now?" she asked.
"Yes, and get your coat."
Cassy ran off, more excited about all these new things than about going to school. Not only her shoes and her bag, but her dress and school jumper. She was very impressed with the fact that the school's colour was red - her current joint favourite colour, along with blue and yellow. Although by next week it would probably be green, purple and orange.
"Ready?" Grissom asked when she returned. Cassy nodded. "Let's go," he said, holding out his hand.
XOXOXOX
When they arrived at Cassy's school, the stampede of butterflies had returned to Grissom's stomach. She'll be fine, he repeated to himself. For the first time, Cassy seemed to realise exactly what going to school entailed. And it meant leaving her dad. Okay, so he left her when he went to work but that was different. She was asleep and had Halle so it didn't matter. But at school she wouldn't have her dad or Halle. And she wasn't sure how she felt about that.
"Who will I talk to without you or Halle?" she asked.
"You'll find someone else to talk to," Grissom replied, not sure who he was trying to convince more, her or himself.
"Who?"
"A girl or boy who's in your class."
Cassy wasn't sure she believed him. But daddy always told the truth, so he had to be right. Only, there were lots of other boys and girls, and they all looked older and like they had friends already. Reluctantly she climbed out of the car and took his hand as they walked up to classroom.
XOXOXOX
Sure enough, Cassy had been fine, and he hadn't slept at all. Grissom was pleased to note that Catherine looked similarly sleep deprived.
"First day of school too?" he asked.
"Yeah. I was terrified the school was going to call and say Lindsey wouldn't stop crying or something and I wouldn't hear the phone, so I didn't sleep. She was fine, and then I couldn't sleep because she wanted to talk about it all afternoon. Go figure."
Kiera walked into the break room and poured herself a mug of coffee, frowning at them.
"You two look like hell," she said. "Didn't you sleep at all?"
"No," Grissom replied.
"Me neither. Boyfriend's fault," she shrugged. "Shoulda known. Being single has it's plus points."
"You could always just go back to your own apartment," he pointed out.
"I could..." Kiera considered the possibility, deciding it was an unlikely one.
XOXOXOX
"And my best friend sits next to me, she's called Lindsey, and she's really pretty and has long hair too but it's the same colour as Matty's," Cassy explained.
"What's her name?" Grissom frowned.
"Lindsey."
"What's her last name?"
"Will... Willows?"
Grissom smiled.
XOXOXOX
"Willows."
"Hey Catherine. I think our daughters just became best friends."