Jennifer's note: I had a lot of fun writing this chapter. It's the first chapter I dedicated based entirely on character development other than just merely continuing on with a stream of events that mean this or that. It kind of brings the core of the story full circle with both Julia and Draco's story, and I thought that was really special. So please! Leave me your feedback, I'd really appreciate it. I put my whole heart in this chapter and couldn't wait to get it out there!

Chapter Ten

"Julia?"

I could feel Oliver tensing as I did when my eyes snapped open. Draco was gone. I forgot about the broom altogether and dropped it and I twisted around, "I'm sorry." I said apologetically to a confused Oliver and took off running. He just stood staring after me.

I could feel the tears welling up in my eyes. I didn't even know what happened. Was he looking for me? Why did he just leave? Why couldn't he just talk to me? I didn't understand. And then I remembered Oliver's close proximity to me…Whispering to me…Me closing my eyes…

It was nothing like that. That was just absurd to me. That couldn't have been it.

I was frantically running where I could, looking towards the trees of the forest, looking towards the castle. I stumbled up the slope up to the hall outside that lead to the clock tower. I couldn't see him anywhere. Was I really starting to imagine things? Did I imagine him being there? I almost laughed; all of this was making me go delusional.

I was ready to sink down on a bench in the hall. I wanted to cry.

Just before I did I saw robes disappearing around the corner.

"Hey! Wait!" I called. I ran faster. I almost tripped but caught myself on the wall.

I turned the corner and I saw him walking down the hall quickly away from me. His slicked blonde head distinct and retreating.

"Draco!" I called.

He didn't turn. I ran after him and just as he was about to turn again I caught the back of his robes.

"Draco, Draco! Please stop." I pleaded. I pulled him back, he just jerked out of my grip and finally turned around. He was glaring at me dangerously and his nostrils were flared.

"What do you want Julia?" He spat. He crossed his arms and continued to scowl murderously.

I instantly took a step back. I forgot what I was chasing him for. I forgot how to breathe. The way he looked at me…It wasn't right. It tore me up.

"I just-" I murmured. Tears were about to spill over my eyes.

"Why do you keep following me?" He interrupted.

"I-I'm not. I just…I just wanted to see if you're okay." I whispered. My eyes were wide, trying to look for the answers in his grey ones. His stare never faltered. They were relentlessly cold.

"I'd be a great load better if you just left me alone." His tone was acidic.

Tears began to stream down my cheeks, I shoved them away angrily. "Why are you doing this. You're supposed to be my best friend."

He shook his head grimly, "Not anymore." He said it without sympathy. Without remorse.

I was in pieces.

"Why are you doing this!" I shrieked at him. I had enough. My fists were balled at my sides. I was frustrated. I just wanted to hit something. I didn't understand the change in him and why he had been lying to me all this time if he never wanted to stay my friend.

I saw his will crumble a little as my breathing was getting heavy and tears were gushing out of my eyes. All this pain was just too much. I was too young. I couldn't understand any of it.

He swallowed, conceding a little bit, he just whispered, "Jules. We can't be friends. We just can't."

I shook my head closing my eyes. "But why Draco…Of course we can. Just because I couldn't be in Slytherin doesn't mean…"

"There's more to it." He was shaking his head. "It's better this way."

"Just tell me why…" I started. I couldn't finish. It was too much. Too much. My stomach was gaping open with all the confusion and anger I felt.

Draco just leaned against the wall and breathed. His eyes were closed too. He was shaking his head.

"All I know is I can't have you around anymore Julia."

I felt like I had been stabbed.

My eyes snapped open and I gritted my teeth. I grabbed the necklace around my neck and yanked it off. It was the delicate silver one with the daisy that he gave to me. I wore it everyday. He watched me as I pulled on it viciously and held it up to him.

I shoved it in his hands and said every word through my teeth, "Everything you ever told me. You were just lying. This whole time. I hate you Draco."

I looked up into his eyes. I'm not sure if I meant it. I think I just wanted to see what he would do. And if he would change his mind. I knew all it was, was just my anger. I didn't hate him. I cared about him too much. But now it hurt to care…His eyes were blank for a moment. He just stood there with my necklace in his hands and his jaw was locked. He just swallowed. And looked at me just as coldly.

"Fine." He said curtly. It was final. He looked unmoved. Unaffected. He didn't care.

I couldn't see anything after that. My eyes filled with tears and I just ran down the hall away from him. He walked the opposite way.

I forgot what the time was. I didn't know if it was hours or minutes later. It all didn't really matter to me. I was lying curled up on my side in the dewy grass next to the shore of the black lake. The sky was a haze of pinks and purples, the sun was painting its dusk across the sky. I subconsciously meandered across the grounds and found myself here. I had never been here. It was beautiful and I swore I saw the monster of the lake pop out once out of its glassy surface. But I couldn't be too sure. I couldn't see clearly. Not since what happened. I wanted to laugh at how melodramatic I had become. But I was too sad for that, too.

As I turned to lay on my back I heard a rustling in the trees. I shot up and looked around nervously. I was looking back at the lake when I heard footsteps.

"Oh-woah- Hi." It was the boy with the messy hair and glasses Draco had been fighting with. He was stepping out of the trees a couple feet away from where I was sitting.

"I'm sorry- do you want me to leave?" He looked just as surprised as I and he gestured that he could just head back.

I smiled, "oh not at all. I think it's big enough out here for the both of us.

He smiled timidly "I just went for a walk. I didn't mean to intrude."

I nodded. He looked cautiously at me before he sat down next to me.

I looked sideways at him, "what's your name?" I said conversationally.

He looked surprised again for a second. "Oh um. I'm Harry."

I nodded oblivious, "I'm Julia Blaire. Nice to meet you."

He genuinely smiled this time and we just sat in silence for a second. I was deliberating.

"I um, I saw you fighting with Draco. Are you okay?" I said slowly. I didn't want to be intrusive but something in me felt like someone should apologize. It wasn't Harry's fault.

Harry's eyebrows pulled together and he looked down at the ground.

"Yeah. That Malfoy's just…He's a git. But I'm okay. Thanks."

"He didn't hex you or anything?" I surveyed Harry. He seemed to be alright. He was really pale and scrawny. He actually reminded me of Draco in some obscure way.

"Oh, er no. He told me to meet him down at the quidditch pitch today so we could duel. I was just there, he never showed I guess. Scared or something…" He was frowning and pulling grass by the roots.

I sat still. That's why Draco had been there…He was going to duel Harry. He wasn't looking for me after all…I felt even fouler than before. I didn't know what to think. But then, he had left. He saw me and left even when he knew he was going to meet Harry. Why was that? Another mystery.

"Don't let him bother you…" I said, trying to put Harry at ease.

"Do you know him or something?" Harry asked.

I looked down and bit my lip. "No, not really."

I didn't know why I lied. I think it's because if I pretended I didn't know him some of the gnawing pain would go away and I could just deal with it if he didn't exist. I doubted it though.

"Oh. Well, he's just a bully. Someone's got to stand up to him." Harry shrugged.

I smiled at Harry, "that's really nice."

He grinned, "you are too. Its really nice to talk to you…You're one of the only pleasant people here…"

I frowned, "why do you say that?"

His faced turned red and he murmured, "it's just really hard being here I guess."

He didn't look at me. I tried to look at him but he just seemed really down about something. I suddenly felt like I could relate.

"For me, too. I um…Thought I knew one of my best friends and he just…He abandoned me."

"I know the feeling. Being abandoned, I mean." Harry said timidly.

I studied Harry for a moment. The paleness of his skin…His glasses…His hair…And then I saw the lightning bolt shaped scar between the strands of black hair concealing it. I had seen him before. I felt like such an idiot. That's why he looked so surprised when I didn't know his name, he was used to people gawking at him all the time. He was the "celebrity" Snape was speaking about. I remember my father in a distant time telling me about him. He was the boy who lived. I suddenly felt a pang of anger towards Snape. Harry probably didn't want to be a celebrity…That's probably why he was so sad. He was constantly reminded of his parents…He had no one. I felt like I was on a similar boat. And then I suddenly felt furious at Draco for trying to fight Harry. He had no right.

"You're really brave. I just, I hope you know that." I said softly.

"Thanks. That means a lot." He said. He looked like he meant it.

We were silent then. It wasn't an awkward silence, it was actually really calming. Dusk was fading into evening and the trees and lake and the whole scenery seemed almost saturated in the crisp air. It was beautiful. Harry had his eyes closed. For one split moment I had clarity.

I wouldn't let Draco's selfishness bring down people like Harry. It was one thing for him to treat me the way he did, but for someone like Harry that was truly inexcusable. I decided to channel my anger towards something worth it. I knew what it would cost me. If I stood on Harry's side instead of Draco's…But I knew that Draco didn't want if it could help Harry, I would do it.

I felt confident about my resolve. I almost felt the warmth coming back into me. I turned and smiled at Harry to make conversation, "do you play quidditch?"

He grinned slightly, "I um, I had my first flying lesson today. McGonagall made me Gryffindor's new seeker."

My mouth fell open in surprise, "that's great!"

He looked anxious, "I know. I can't even believe it. I'm really nervous I've never really played…"

I smiled, "you're going to do great. You know, you should come sit with me and my friends at dinner. I hangout with practically the whole team and the commentator."

"Really?" He was excited now.

"Yeah, I'm sure they'd like to get to know you."

"Wow, thanks. Cool." He stammered.

I grinned, I was feeling good about this already. I stood up and stretched, "do you want to go up now?"

Harry nodded and stood up. Him and I walked through the trees and out onto the huge expanse of grass leading up to the castle.

"Do you play quidditch?" He asked quietly.

I laughed, "definitely not." I remembered today's debacle and shook my head. Quidditch and I were not a healthy mix. I'm sure it would result in my premature death if I even tried to pursue it.

He grinned, "yeah. I'm pretty new to all of this. I um…I was raised by muggles. This is kind of a shock for me."

I nodded. "It's a shock for me too, don't worry."

I was amazed at how easy it was to talk to Harry. Even more so than Hermione or Fred or Oliver. He was extremely down to earth and it was refreshing to know that these kinds of persons still existed.

As we were talking quietly to eachother I looked up. My heart almost stopped. Coming towards Harry and I down the slope was Draco and a couple of his new friends.

"Great." Harry muttered and shoved his hands in the pockets of his jeans. He looked down.

I bit my lip down and looked at Harry, and then at Draco's distant figure walking cockily towards us. I took a deep breath.

I know what to do…I know who I have to be…

In that breath, I took life of a new more confident Julia. A Julia who wouldn't be scared. A Julia who didn't need to depend on her best friend to be strong. I'd be myself, I could do this.

Draco and his cronies stopped a couple feet from us. He stood in front of them. I frowned, they were immensely built and looked like they could snap me in half. I looked nervously at Harry and I felt scared for him too. The night around us made it all more daunting and I shivered.

Gah! Why was I such a whimp!

"It's okay Julia." Harry muttered and stepped in front of me, but I continued and stood next to him and nodded at him smiling. Then I turned to Draco and just gave him an icy look.

He was staring malevolently at both of us, the aura of our fight earlier that day lingered like an elephant.

"Leave." He said dismissively to me, he looked at me quickly and paid attention to Harry.

I spoke up. "Leave him alone. He didn't do anything to you."

"I said leave. Now." Draco said more firmly.

I rolled my eyes at how childish Draco could be. He wasn't threatening me. There wasn't anything he could do to scare me.

"We have unfinished business Potter." Draco said calmly. He smirked, toying with his wand in his robes.

"I don't want to fight you, Malfoy." Harry said calmly. He stood confidently and locked eyes with Draco.

"Oh yeah? You scared Potter? Where's mommy?" Draco laughed coldly, his cronies cackling behind him.

"Don't talk to him about that. Even without a mother at least he didn't turn out as messed up as you." I spat angrily at him.

At that point Draco advanced and was inches away from my face looking down at me. The tension was paralyzing. "I don't want to hurt you Julia." He said quietly through his teeth. His grey eyes were piercing through mine. It was like he was pleading.

I laughed without humor, "it's too late for that."

Draco's teeth clenched together and he looked stiffly at Potter, "you always let girls do your fighting for you?" Harry just continued to stare, I saw his knuckles clenched tight over his fist and wand. Draco was about to strike…

"You'd know something about that." I chimed to delay the time. I didn't want them to fight. The next thing that happened…was very different.

This time Draco gave me a sharp look and just eyed me desperately. Like he was trying to tell me something through his eyes. It wasn't that cold and dead stare I was used to when trying to fathom any of his cruel actions towards me. I just shook my head stubbornly. I couldn't fall for this one. Not anymore. The old Julia was gone. The one that stood in front of Draco whenever harm came his way. That girl was gone. Just like how the smiling boy who saved my broken sword and walked me home in his drawers just so I'd be safe…was gone.

Draco gave up whatever he was trying to do by looking at me like the way he did. His jaw locked and he looked at Potter with his eyes narrowed. "We'll finish this later. Crabbe. Goyle. Let's go."

Draco smirked at Harry and didn't look at me again. He began walking up the slope with a disappointed Crabbe and Goyle behind him, looking over their shoulders and raising their fists to us to signal this wasn't over.

When they were out of sight I let out a breath and laughed shakily at Harry.

"Thanks, Julia. You didn't have to do that." Harry said warmly, shoving his hands in his pockets.

"Anytime." I whispered.

I looked down, the two halves of what I wanted and what I knew had to be done, warring inside me.

Earlier that day. Draco's POV

I held her necklace in my shaking pale hands. I didn't know where I was. I just walked anywhere and I was alone in an empty corridor where I couldn't be seen. I looked at the ceiling and covered my eyes with my hands. Even with my eyes closed Julia's face was the only thing I saw. Everywhere I turned it was that same pained expression that haunted me. I never wanted her to see me like this...I had told Potter to come to the pitch so there would be no chance that Julia would see me in my villainous state as she had earlier...Her face...I was so ashamed. And it was just like the magnet. She was there again at the pitch stalking my every step subconsciously making this all the more difficult.

What had I done…This was exactly the opposite of what I had planned…Of course I knew the repercussions that would follow if I ignored Julia. I knew she would be angry, I knew she would be frustrated when I had to act like a jerk. But to say that she hated me…I felt like a thousand ton weight had been dropped on me and I couldn't breathe. Pieces of me were missing. My Julia…The girl I cared about…I had made her this way. I made her sad and repulsed and feel alone. I never wanted any of this. She knew I was becoming something…completely unlike myself. No matter what my father said, I knew I owed her some kind of explanation…some kind of warning…I could tell her why I couldn't talk to her anymore right?

There were just so many complications…If I told her, she'd try to find some way to help me. She'd find some way to tell me that I could choose my own way other than my father's…She'd tell me I had a choice and things didn't have to be this way. And then it would come down to choosing between what I wanted and what I had to do.

I scowled. Julia always did the good thing. She was so good and she was the best part of me. Now that I could feel her slipping away from me all I could feel was the role of this person…This horrible person consuming me. Becoming me.