Disclaimer: I realize I didn't put a disclaimer on my other chapters, so here goes. I think we all know who owns the original story, and it certainly isn't me. I own Rachel only, and whatever else you don't recognize as being Tolkien's. I am writing this simply for fun, no profit gained whatsoever except for feedback from readers.

A/N: A new chapter! Woot!

Chapter 10-Depths of Depression

While the next day dawned bright and cheerful, Rachel's emotions were anything but. It felt like a storm of despair was brewing inside her, grey clouds of self-pity and loss began taking their hold on her.

Rachel awoke again in her room and was momentarily confused. She could have sworn the last place she had been was outside by a tree, looking at the moonlit sky and all its stars and how much she missed home. The thought quickly left like it were a lone leaf blowing away into the wind, never to be seen again. Her mood was too dark and sorrowful to care much about such a minor detail like that. Laying back down on the bed, Rachel stared dumbly at nothing, just content to wallow in her misery.

She fast sunk into a state of depression, not bothering to come out of her room. She cared not what the others thought, the deep layers of grief and anger burying her under their mountainous weight and volume. She was never going home again, so what kind of life could she now have?

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Elladan was in the breakfast hall when two elves, Revion and Morfindien, came rushing into the room, apparently intent on finding someone of importance to speak with. When they spotted Elladan at the table, they told him what was so urgent.

"Sorry to trouble you sir Elladan, but we believe that your charge, the human woman, is outside of these walls, asleep on the ground by a tree. We know not what she is doing there, but she is starting to cause a scene as she is, ah…." That is when the elf broke off the words, slightly embarrassed at what he was going to say next.

Elladan did not need any elaboration as he already had a good idea of what Revion was trying to say. He got up abruptly and went outside to where the two elves showed the human woman to be. The woman was lying there, in her nightwear no less, sound asleep, oblivious to everything else around her. Elladan sighed and promptly went over to pick her up and carry her back inside where she would not be in view of everyone in such a state of undress.

As he walked down the halls with the light-weight form of the woman in his arms, his curiosity and concern for her grew. "What was she doing outside like that? Is she not aware of how indecent that is?" Realizing he would not get any answers to these questions at this time, he made a mental note to ask his father to question her on this when next she woke. He put her down in the bed in the guest room and tucked her in. He stopped to look upon her sleeping features and noticed she seemed troubled even in slumber, brow creased with a general look of discontent upon her face.

He, as well as just about all of Rivendell, had heard her loud commotion the previous day. When he had asked about it, he was told about her situation and the fact that she would not be able to return back to her world. It was tragic really, for she was stuck in a new environment, no doubt strange and unfamiliar to her, with no way back to wherever she came from. He found himself wishing in that moment that he could somehow ease her fears and worries, and help her adjust to this place and Middle-Earth at large. But a gnawing feeling nagged at him, saying she was not one to run to others for comfort, and that she would make things more difficult for herself as time went on. Well, he could at least try.

One last look at the sleeping woman and Elladan then left the room, shutting the door behind him quietly so as not to disturb her. His conscious plagued him that her general well-being would suffer and he wanted to help her through this, be there for her as a friend should be. But all this was not relevant at present, there was nothing else he could do at the moment. Needless to say, thoughts of her played across his mind often as he went about his day.

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Elrond's concern for the human girl was growing by the day. She had not come out of her room for nearly five days, sleeping for most of that time, refusing to talk with him and ignoring everyone else. He had explicitly told the two maid-servants, Miriel and Faelwen, to continue doing what they could for her, bringing her food at mealtimes and helping to prepare baths for her each new day. Miriel had also told him that the girl barely ate what she was given, seeming only to pick at the food here and there, if even that. The elf lord was worried about her health, both her physical health and her emotional state. Rachel would slowly waste away if she continued doing this to herself. Miriel had also told him that if Rachel kept this up, the elf woman was debating whether to feed her by force, if necessary. She would rather not have to do so, but all things considered….

Elrond understood; the girl was being difficult. He knew some things about human behavior, after all having Aragorn living within these walls for a time, but he was no expert on the subject. He was even less knowledgeable about human women and their emotional moods that they were wont to have. He was not completely in the dark about this though, so he decided it best to leave the girl alone, apart from the maid-servants helping out with her care. Then perhaps Rachel would soon come out of her bleak shell that she had purposefully shrank into, after regaining some of her senses back. He would not wait for too long, however as human health was more fragile than that of elf-kind. The woman would not last very long without proper nourishment. Elrond would never allow anyone to fade away like this, not if he could help it.

The Lord of Rivendell suspected that Rachel withdrew in this fashion, to try to shield herself from her problems and hide away from the world, but she was not helping matters any. She would only make them worse, especially for herself. Further action would need to be taken if she refused to cooperate and interact with everybody else as a normal, healthy person should. The last time he had checked on her, she had been blankly staring at the wall by the bed as though she were a statue, hardly moving and not even acknowledging the elf lord when he came into the room. She seemed almost catatonic really.

Two more days, he decided. If Rachel would not come out willingly, then there was no other choice than to make her do so. Isolation for anybody, no matter their race, was completely unhealthy on many levels. He prayed to the Valar that there would be no need to coerce her against her will, that she would take the hint or get weary of being by herself and come out on her own terms without any outside force. Elrond was starting to come to his wit's end here. So he prayed that she would regain her sense of self and hope before too much time has passed.

Gandalf had already voiced his concerns as well, but neither one knew anything more what they could do that they have not already tried. As he had mentioned at the meeting those several days before, it was ultimately up to her how she coped with the situation.

As another day drew to a close, he put those thoughts away for now, deciding to see what the next dawn would bring. Tomorrow would be a new start, and another chance for Rachel to get her bearings back. He gave her depressive plight no more thought that evening.

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Rachel tossed and turned, nightmares continuing to haunt her sleep. Then the dream scene changed, with Rachel once more in that vast, sparkling hall of light. She looked around and noticed the two Valar beings looking at her with grave expressions. Rachel stood there, unsure what to do or say in that moment.

"You cannot continue this charade of yours, Rachel Brown. It is not in your favor to do so, you must toughen up and accept what has happened, there is no other way." Varda admonished her firmly.

At this, Rachel grew angry. "You know nothing! Nothing of how I feel! I am only doing what is natural, what else am I supposed to do?! This isn't my world, I don't belong here, I just want to go home!" she broke down, the tears once more falling.

The two Vala looked at her with some pity, but also with sternness. "You don't have a choice, mortal. This IS your home now. You can either accept it and live your life, or carry on the way you are now and not achieve anything, it is your decision to make." Manwe told her, brow creasing with minor annoyance.

Rachel looked at them, a pleading look upon her face. "Please, can't you do anything? Send me back, I'll do anything! I need to go back! Send me home, please." she added in a much quieter tone of voice.

The Valar shook their heads.

"You know we can't do that Rachel, things are not that simple." Varda explained. "Either you accept your fate as it is now, or perish." She paused. "One word of advice child. Things may look bleak to you now, but that won't last forever. I guarantee you will upset others by your behavior and you will not accomplish anything worthy with your life if you continue to shut people out. Look at the bright side of things, some people would love to be in your place, it's an opportunity to start afresh, a new horizon to explore and discover. You are experiencing something no one else from your world has ever experienced, a new world and races of beings. As the people of your home of Earth would say, 'Carpe diem!' or 'Seize the day!' You have only this one life, child, make the most of it. Otherwise, you will regret it in the long-run. Remember this."

"This may be the last time we speak with each other, Rachel." Manwe said to her. "It is ultimately up to you how you interpret our advice. Do not forget of what we talked about here. Farewell, and peace be with you."

Rachel was about to respond but the scene of the vast chamber was already fading from her view, as well as the vision of the two Valar.

She was back in her room at the home of the elves, with only the white walls and furnishings to keep her company. Rachel sighed heavily and reluctantly, she got out of bed, swinging her legs over the side of the mattress. She had to admit, the two beings had a point. What more could she do? Might as well attempt to do something other than wallow in self-pity. But it wouldn't be that easy to just forget what she left behind. Earth would always be her home. Now she had to learn to get used to this one and adapt to the circumstances. As far as calling Middle-Earth her home, that boat hadn't sailed yet, and Rachel wasn't sure it ever would. But that would be for later, much later. Getting out of this room was the first step.

And she did just that. Changing into her familiar jeans and short-sleeved top which had been returned to her as she wasn't used to wearing dresses, let alone being able to put one on without help. The lacings were too intricate to figure out and tie behind her back on her own. Her clothes were now the only physical link to her old home and as far as Rachel was concerned, she didn't ever want to part with them.

Tentatively opening the door, she peeked out before stepping outside the room. She faltered a little, before mustering up her courage and continued on down through the hallways and corridors, not really sure where she was going. The few elves that were around in the hallways looked at her with some surprise, but otherwise they went back to what they were doing before.

Rachel's destination was the garden outside where she sat that one night in despair. She wanted to be outside and alone with her thoughts. She needed to think about her situation. At first she didn't think she was going in the right direction, but her worry was quickly abated once she saw the greens and flowering plants of the tranquil garden. She continued on over to where she had seen a bench before facing towards the river in the distance, but when she got there she stopped short. One of the elven twins was sitting there, his head bowed low in his hands. She didn't know which twin it was and was about to slip away as quietly as she could to go somewhere else, but he must have heard her approach as he looked up right at her. His expression brightened when he saw her standing there and gave her a warm smile, getting up to greet her. Rachel did not return the smile, instead she just stood there awkwardly pondering how to escape.

Just as he approached her, Rachel backed away with uncertainty. His smile faltered some and he looked at her, confused. The nearness of him was intoxicating to Rachel, she could smell his strong, masculine scent. She was very uncomfortable and made to get away, when he stopped her, gently grabbing hold of her wrist to keep her from running off.

He spoke in that calming, melodious voice of his, with a questioning look in his eyes. Rachel shook her head, trying to get away. He let her go and she ran off towards the Rivendell grounds. On the way back indoors, Rachel accidentally bumped into a male elf she didn't recognize. Muttering an apology, she continued her quest to get inside. The elf looked at her slightly puzzled at this, but shrugged it off.

Meanwhile, Elladan watched her go, a frown on his features. What did I do? he wondered. Why is she so afraid of me? He shook his head and sighed, before heading back over to the bench, his thinking spot. He wanted to get to know her better, become friends if possible, but it didn't seem likely to happen with the way she was acting. He wondered if she did that because of her new surroundings, or if there was something else going on with her that he didn't know about. He only wanted to attempt to speak with her, try to understand her better and to ease her troubles somewhat. However, she did not appear to welcome the comfort and companionship he was offering. Elladan hoped that would change sometime and soon. He knew the lives of mortals were short, and that he did not have all the time in the world to make friends with her. He had eternity, but she did not. All he could do was wait. Then maybe she would come around. He hoped so anyways.

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