Title: Yuletide Cheer

Author: veritaserumMaster / PageNotFound404

Rating: T (Rating might go up in the future.)

Pairings: JPSS

Warnings: AU, Language.

Summary: Marauder Era. 7th year. Severus's life was a routine: wake up, eat, study, get bullied, study, eat, study, get bullied, study, eat, and sleep. Getting asked out by his Tormentor (with a capital letter T) though, was not on his itinerary.

Disclaimer: I don't own anything. Please don't sue me.

A/N: This story is slash, so if you don't like that, then why are you reading this in the first place?

***IMPORTANT MESSAGE: PLEASE READ THIS BEFORE PROCEEDING TO THE STORY BELOW***

Okay, so in this chapter there is already a closure. I fully believe that it is crappy because I made Severus OOC and I hate myself for it. I can write another chapter if you feel that this ending sucks since I have another one in my head right now. I could probably throw in their graduation or something. If you think that this chapter needs improvement (which I totally think it does), or it's fine on its own, or you'd want another chapter, please, please leave a review or shoot me a message so I know what to do. Thanks for all of the support, guys. I love you all. :D!

**JP**SS**

The party was in full swing and everyone was having fun, but James was in the corner, nursing a glass of juice that had a hint of alcohol in it. The party has started at 6 and three hours had passed and he still hasn't moved from his table. The Ravenclaw girl from the incident before tried to approach him several times, and every time a harsh stinging hex hit her from the dance floor. He didn't care who sent the hex but he was grateful. He didn't want to deal with that right now; he had to wait for Severus.

The party was dying down but James was still holding out hope. He wished and prayed that Severus would show. He knew it was a dick move to go into his room but he saw no other choice when Severus always ignored him. He heard the band saying that they would be playing the last song but there was still no sign of Severus. The others have come to offer their sympathies for him. Not saying a word but patting him on the back and giving him looks. Even Malfoy came over with Lily. He must look really pathetic to receive the look of pity and sympathy from Malfoy, who up until now still hasn't had the balls to confess to Lily.

As the last notes of the song resonated throughout the hall and the last of the students left, James stood up and went to the centre of the dance floor. He wanted to cry really, his heart was breaking into a million pieces because Severus didn't show. He wanted to cry but he steeled himself. He'd save that sort of thing for later. Right now he needed to convince himself to accept the fact that Severus wants nothing to do with him, he'd hurt him too much. If he was Severus he wouldn't forgive James, either.

He looked at the band as they were just packing up.

"Hey!"

They looked up at him.

"Can you play one last song?"

"Sorry, kid, we're officially off," their lead vocalist answered.

"Oh, come on. I'm a teenage boy who has been stood up by the one person who I ever loved. And he doesn't want anything to do with me. I need to wallow in my own misery for a while and what better way to do that than to slow dance by myself to some sad music? Don't you feel sympathetic?" he tried using his puppy-dog-eyes.

"Listen, kid-"

"No, dude," their guitarist interrupted. "I totally get the kid's pain. First loves are always hardest, man. This one's for you dude."

He started strumming his yet-to-be-packed guitar in a slow and sad tune. The others shrugged, followed his lead, and resigned themselves to the fact that their guitarist is a very weird person.

A few seconds later, and the singer was crooning something about wanting someone back. James bowed to them and swayed slightly to the music, closing his eyes. He hoped that Severus would appear out of nowhere and dance with him but he knows that that is impossible. So he thought about everything that happened in the last few months of his Hogwarts's days, and how much fun he had with Severus, how happy he was showing him how he really feels, the feel of his lips on his, his smile, everything about him that made James fall in love.

The music stopped and he opened his eyes, they were blurry from tears but he can see the figures of the band members looking at him with sad eyes. He wiped his tears off carefully.

"Thank you," he said to the band and bowing slightly.

"Anytime, dude," their guitarist said.

He nodded once and started walking out the doors.

"Hey, kid!" James turned around when he heard the vocalist call him.

"It won't get better. You just accept it and move on," he said.

"I know," James mouthed, he felt like he would cry if he talked again.

"But it won't hurt to hope a little. Because you might feel like nothing's possible now, but there's always something to hope for."

"Okay," James said. He didn't really know what else to say to that. He nodded again and left.

As he was walking towards his house, he thought about what the vocalist said and thought that it wasn't true. It hurts so much to hope, because there's nothing to hope for, not anymore.

He stopped when he reached an empty and dim corridor and let himself go. He cried and cried and his tears seemed endless. He didn't know how long he stayed curled up in himself there but after what seems like infinity, he managed to pull himself up and to his dormitory. Remus gave him his prefect's room so that he could wallow in self-pity and sadness and also because Remus is nice and wanted to save him from mortification if he ever walked into Sirius doing the nasty. Remus is also over at his girlfriend's room who is also a prefect.

He decided to go into his dorm room, though, to get some clothes at least. He opened the doors and thanked every deity he knew that no one was there bumping uglies. He debated just sleeping here but he didn't want to be bothered tomorrow. He searched through his trunk for his pajama pants when he remembered that he left it on his bed for easy access. He stood up and pulled back the curtains.

What he saw made his heart skip a beat and he thought, Well, those aren't my pajamas.

Severus was on his bed, sleeping and hugging James's pillow. He reached out a shaky hand to brush away the strand of hair from Severus's face.

Oh. So much better than my pajamas.

His hand slid down to Severus's cheek and his eyes fluttered at the feel of Severus's skin.

I hope I'm not dreaming.

Severus stirred at his touch and he opened his eyes. His mouth formed an "O" when he realized who he was looking at and he sat up. James put a hand on Severus's shoulder when he tried to stand up. James was glad that Severus didn't fight him, choosing instead to look down and clutch at his chest. James sat down at the edge of the bed, just looking at Severus and waiting for him to talk.

Minutes passed by and the heavy silence continued until Severus opened his mouth to talk.

"I went," he said.

"What? Where?" James asked, confused.

"I went to the party to see you," Severus clarified.

James was shocked, "You did? I didn't see you."

Severus shook his head, "You're not the only one who's good at hiding themselves."

"Why did you go then? If you were planning on hiding, why did you go?" James tried to ask gently but his voice wavered at the last bit.

"I-," Severus cut himself off and breathed deeply before continuing. "I'm sorry," he whispered.

"For what? I should-" he was cut off by Severus's hand on his mouth.

Severus shook his head and without removing his hand he moved so that he was also sitting on the edge of the bed, facing James.

"No, no. Let me- Let me talk. Just let me, please," Severus asked.

He was determined. James can see the look on his face. He was familiar with that look, his Housemates perfected that look. So he nodded and Severus slowly took off his hand from his mouth.

"I'm sorry. I went there because I thought I'd be strong enough to walk into that hall and admit to everyone that-that I-I don't know," Severus threw his hands up in exasperation. He tried looking for the right words to say but he couldn't. He took a deep breath and tried again.

He looked Potter in the eye and said seriously, "I don't love you, Potter."

"W-what?" James's heart sank and he looked away. Tears threatened to fall and he couldn't bear to have Severus see him like that.

"James," he heard Severus say and it was the first time that Severus said his name that he turned his head towards him. His eyes were teary again but he steeled himself for what Severus has to say. No matter how much it would hurt him, he'd still listen.

"James, I don't love you," he said again, and now James actually thinks that Severus is doing this on purpose. "Not yet."

Feeling courage blooming in his chest (or maybe it was adrenaline and nerves), Severus started talking and didn't stop.

"I mean, I have strong feelings for you, James. Very strong feelings and what happened just broke my heart because- because it's hard for me to trust anyone anymore and you suddenly having a change of heart and then that time in the locker room, I didn't know what to believe anymore. I'm not totally innocent in this situation, I overreacted and I'm sorry for that. It was just so difficult. And then I went to the ball and I saw you sitting in the corner and I wanted to go there and wipe the frown off your face and just hold your hand but I was afraid. I don't even know what I was afraid of, but I was, so I headed here and I thought I'd wait for you but it took you some time to get here and I fell asleep and now I don't know what I'm saying and I'm rambling because for once in my life words escape me and it's all because of you and you make me do and feel things I never thought I'd feel again, and maybe that's what terrifies me a bit, but it's okay because all the things you make me feel are good things and I may not be able to tell you I love you but I want to give us a chance and it may not be the wisest decision considering we're about to graduate soon but I know you're going to be an auror because that's what you've been saying since we were in first year and I'm not planning on going anywhere after graduation but maybe that's assuming too much or overthinking or being overconfident that you'd be staying with me for that long and please, please stop me from talking because I can't even understand me any-"

James surged forwards and cradled Severus's head in his hands and pressed his lips on him in a gentle kiss. Severus sighed into the kiss and held James's hands.

James pulled away but kept their foreheads pressed together.

"Severus, I understand. I love you, and if you there's even the slightest chance of you loving me back then I'll spend every moment turning your feelings into love. I love you, okay? And I'm sorry."

"Okay."

They kissed again and this time Severus thought, Of all our kisses, this one is the best.