Secrets

Authors note: Thanks to everyone being so patient! I know I said every day or every other day but I'm still out of town so I'm having to write this on my tablet which sucks. The regular schedule should be back to normal by next week! And yay for being more than halfway done!

I sat on the couch next to Sam wearing the new clothes he had brought home for me. A pair of snug blue jeans, black converse and a plain black t shirt. I had one of Deans blue flannels over the shirt. It made me feel safe being wrapped up in his scent.

I was waiting for Dean to get out of the shower so we could leave. Where? I have no idea.

Sam sat casually on the sofa while flipping mindless through television channels. "Great job on your kills the other day," he commented before settling on a history documentary.

Benny, who was sat in a recliner that caddy cornered the sofa, mumbled under his breath while cleaning a hand gun.

I raised my eyebrow while Sam rolled his eyes. Feeling confrontational, I looked over to him with an unamused glare. "Care to say it out loud?"

Benny placed the gun on his lap and crossed his arms. His face was twisted as if he had smelled something rotten. "What? Do you want a cookie for doing your fucking job?," he spat at me. Each word sounding like venom as they exited his mouth.

I tilted my head and balled my fists up. Sam noticed but said nothing most likely wanting to stay out of yet another one of Benny's pissy fits. "Sorry I'm not accustomed to murdering people for a living. Also, I've never even seen you kill someone so who's really not doing their job now?," I shot back.

Benny pursed his lips while Sam tried to hide his amused laughter behind his hand. "Kid, I've killed more people than you've ever met," Benny said angrily.

Sam started laughing louder now. "Enough with the pissing contest, Benny!"

Benny frowned and put his gun back together quickly. I stood to go find Dean before things escalated anymore.

Benny stood also with his handgun pointing straight at me. I stared at the barrel but felt no fear. Another new thing I can add to the list of interesting facts about myself.

Sam continued to sit but looked back and forth at the two of us quickly. As if he was trying to decipher the situation for himself.

Benny took the safety off while never wavering the guns position aiming at my chest. He must have really hated me.

"I'll shot you. I don't give a shit if your Deans pet of the week. You mean nothing to me," he said with cold, hard eyes.

I stood motionless in front of him and decided against saying anything to piss him off even more. Even I knew it was idiotic to banter with someone who quite literally held your life in their hands.

"What the fuck is going on?," came Deans angry and loud voice from the side of me.

I didn't bother to turn to face him. Nervous that if I looked away for even a second that Benny would take his chance to get rid of me.

Dean stood in front of me and offered his hand from behind his back while facing Benny and his gun. I took it and held it in my hand as I pressed myself firmly against the length of Deans back.

"Benny! Stand the fuck down right now," Dean growled lowly in his throat.

I wasn't even going to ignore how much that was a turn on. To see Dean so protective and animalistic was going to drive me crazy.

I peaked my head over Dean shoulder and saw Benny's face fall. He lowered the gun and switched the safety back on before placing it in the waistband of his jeans.

There was something about the way Benny obeyed everything Dean told him to do. Not that I was any different but that was the point. Benny bowed his head slightly and had the decency to look ashamed of himself. "I'm sorry," he said lowly more to Dean than to me.

"Don't tell me that," Dean replied as he pulled my arm to bring me underneath his muscular arm.

I smiled like I just got picked first for dodgeball. Benny scowled at me while he muttered a half assed apology my way.

Dean watched as Benny left the living room with a metaphoric tail between his legs. He turned his head and placed a gentle kiss on my forehead. "Don't let that asshole bother you."

I nodded and broke away from Dean to collect myself. He turned to Sam and threw his hands up. "Thanks for the help, bitch," he said sarcastically to his younger brother.

Sam laughed and shrugged in a 'what are you going to do' way.

XXX

"Where are we going?," I asked from the passenger seat of a black dodge avenger.

Dean switched vehicles tonight to separate his impala from the crime scene where Cas killed Josh. It had been three days and Dean has yet to make him kill again but if he was being honest about it, his skin was crawling to dig another knife into someone.

But he knew that wasn't what this was disappointingly. Tonight, Sam and Crowley were using the business room for some of their own kills.

"You'll see," Dean said with a smirk on his face.

I sighed and looked down at out in twined hands that rested in between us. A small smile pulled at my lips. I couldn't remember the last time anyone gave me the feelings that Dean did or if there was even anyone at all that's ever made me feel as alive as I do with him.

The sounds of Guns N' Roses flooded the car playing one of my favorite songs. 'Sweet child o' mine.' I closed my eyes and hummed softly to the guitar intro.

The verse began sweetly as I looked over and into Deans eyes whose full attention was now on me. The light reluctantly turned green and I felt a twinge of sadness as Deans eyes tore back to pay attention to the road.

He sang softly from the front seat as a sappy smile played on his lips. And I thought he couldn't get anymore beautiful.

The car pulled into park but I couldn't care to take my eyes off the one thing that makes me feel right. Dean turned to face me and placed a soft hand on my face as he sang.

"He's got eyes of the bluest skies as if they thought of rain. I hate to look into those eyes and see an ounce of pain," he altered the lyrics while leaning closer.

The end of his sentence now tickling my lips before he firmly pressed against mine I moaned lowly and kissed back just as reverently if not more. His tongue traced my lips in a question of entrance.

I agreed willingly and let his tongue find its way into my mouth and mine into his. Our tongues danced slowly to the hum of the guitars flooding through the speakers.

It was heated. It was passionate and it was not like anything I have ever experienced. I knew in that moment that I would be forever lost to Dean Winchester.

Dean pulled away gently as the music came to an end. He placed his forehead onto mine and smiled.

"In a world like this, it's hard to find something worth living for. I'm damn lucky I found you," he whispered and pulled away.

I squeezed my eyes shut as if Dean would be gone when I reopened them. I could still feel the trace of his lips against mine. It was addicting and I could only count down the minutes until I could get them again.

"Come on," Dean whispered pulling me out of my lustful haze.

I opened my eyes and actually took the time to take in my surroundings. We were at what looked to be a beach of some kind. It was hard to make out all the details through the night fog but I was certain that I could definitely hear waves crashing.

Dean reached into the backseat and pulled out a small blanket that was neatly folded before climbing out of his seat. He briskly walked over to my side where he opened my door as well with a goofy but lovable smile plastered all over his face.

I pretended to swoon as I got out and pecked his lips chastely. "Well, aren't you a romantic," I teased.

Dean shut the door softly and locked the car. He bent his arm, offering for me to wrap my arm around it. "Oh, baby. You haven't seen anything yet."

XXX

We sat on a dock that led to the ocean. It was about midnight and the full moon was shining bright above us.

We took the precautions to take our shoes off so we could dip our feet into the cool water. I sat with my head resting on Deans shoulder and his arm wrapped tightly around my shoulders.

The blanket he brought was wrapped snugly around us both. Everything was perfect. Just a week ago, he was some stranger who seemed to know everything about me. Now, I was learning about him.

We may not have met the conventional way but sometimes life doesn't go exactly the way you plan. And I was one hundred percent okay with that.

"When did you first know that you wanted me?," I asked out loud, breaking the comfortable silence we were once sharing.

"The moment I laid eyes on you," he answered without a beat.

"And when was that?," I questioned. I was just genuinely curious and now is as good a time as any to ask.

Dean seemed to think for a moment. "It was in Lawrence," he recalled before continuing, "I had to hunt down this guy who was attending the Kansas States graduation."

"My school," I noted softly.

Dean nodded and looked off into the waves that were beginning to slow down. "Yeah. Three years ago, like I said. I sat in the stands directly behind the guy. I remember just staring so hard at him so I wouldn't lose him. But then I realized how creepy that might have looked so I started to watch the actually ceremony."

"They had that pretty cool flat screen hanging up that projected your class as they walked onto stage to grab their diplomas. It was actually pretty cool. I've never been to a graduation before. The moment I looked up they had called out 'Castiel James Novak.' You were fucking beautiful. You still are, but even more so when I first saw you. I was so floored by you that I almost lost sight of my target but I knew I would never forget that face or name. That night, I tortured that guy and all I could do was imagine you alongside me digging a blade into him. I knew I had to have you."

I let out the breath I didn't realize I had been holding while he spoke so calmly about stalking me.

"And when that fucking piece of shit tried to touch you a few years later, I had half a mind to impale him right hen and there but no matter how pissed off I was, I knew I had methods I had to follow so I planned his kidnap and murder carefully," Dean spoke about my late boss.

"I was ready. So fucking ready to take him that night. I was sitting in my car across the street with a good view of the alley way he had pulled you into on the way to your car. I had actually almost jumped out but then you fought back," he said with obvious pride.

"You fought back and you killed him. I didn't have the tools with me to clean up a murder just yet. Only shit to knock him out with so I raced home only to find out that you had turned yourself in. It fucking blew but I knew I couldn't go another day on this planet without you. And that's when I devised the plan to get you," Dean finished and turned back to me.

I was sure my face was still twisted in shock at Deans words. I knew he watched me for three years but I wasn't aware just how deep it went and I knew my immediate reaction wasn't the most sane to have.

I threw my arms around his shoulders and pulled him into me. Our lips met messily while our teeth clattered against each others. I couldn't find it in me to care.

The only thing I knew for certain was that my world began and ended with Dean Winchester.