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I'm so heavy, heavy . . . Heavy in your arm . . . I'm so heavy, heavy . . . So heavy in your arms . . .

"You ought to know, I think of you all the time. I always have. Even when we're not together."

"You always have?"

"Yes. From the first moment I laid eyes on you."

Damon and I were lying in my hospital bed together, listening to the steady melody of a monitor's beeping and the sound of our heartbeats. Damon recounted how he had escaped from Katherine to me. I listened intently, enthralled by the story of his strength.

Damon explained that as he was about to be beaten by Katherine and her minion, he fell to the ground and thought that he would be staked. But someone saved him. Someone came from nowhere and escaped from Katherine, taking Damon with him. Damon remembered the rescuer saying something to him before he left, but he couldn't remember. When he had finished his story, I whispered against his black shirt, "Thank you. For trying to save me."

Damon smirked the way he always did. My heart fluttered. Before this trip, I hadn't much minded how confident he was. It made me love him more. "Anything for you," he replied.

"So you really don't know who your savior is?"

"No. I remember thinking I knew him, but I'm not so sure. I don't remember his face at all. I barely remember anything from that. Katherine was so strong. If that person who saved me hadn't been around, they would have staked me, I'm sure of it."

Damon laid a hand upon mine. I hadn't realized it, but I had clutched his shirt tightly in my fist at the mention of his death.

I contemplated how suddenly attached I was to Damon. Of course, this road trip with him had opened my eyes to how similar Damon and I were, as well as how Damon really was. I realized that perhaps, in the back of my mind, I'd always known Damon for who he truly was, but allowed his mask to distract me. Damon wore a mask, a very prominent and off-putting mask, which diverted me and made me believe Damon's mask was really he in his truest form. But being so close to Damon, being with him those past days had me comprehending that, unlike most people, when I had first met Damon, I didn't only see the mask. I must have seen him, truly and purely, but was quickly distracted by that damn mask of his, like so many others had been. I liked Damon without the mask though. I knew he didn't like others viewing his vulnerability because like so many others, he was afraid of getting hurt. This was such a human fear, something you wouldn't think a strong, seemingly impenetrable vampire such as Damon would experience. Then again, this is why he wore the mask. In fact, he was actually very penetrable, and I had permeated his shell, and seen him for what he truly, absolutely was.

I continued to think about this as I not only slid further down into Damon's arms but also slid way down into sleep. I fell into a very deep sleep, the type without dreams. I barely stirred at all as I slept so soundly, waking only once. It was very murky when I did wake that once; I likened it to rising from deep, black waters, and into a stormy sky. There was thunder: shouting. There was lighting and flashing lights. Nothing was clear; I couldn't even be sure it was real, rather than just a dream. My vision was blurred and mostly obscured by the blinding fluorescent lightbulbs of the hospital. However, I could make out two, tall, most likely male figures, standing over me. I was not afraid though, for I knew they were not facing me and were not looking to do something to do me. I could see they were confronting each other. I could hear them conversing as well, but I couldn't make out what they were saying very well despite the fact that they were yelling at each other very loudly. They were fighting. As I drifted in and out of repose, I could at least see they were plainly shouting and arguing with each other. They flailed their arms and made exaggerated gestures with their hands. I wanted to ask them why they were arguing, but I also wanted them to be quiet so I could sleep. I couldn't find my voice though, so I settled down into the recesses of slumber and didn't rise from it for several more hours.

Soon, those hours had passed, and my eye cracked open slowly. It was daytime, and I was alone in the room. I glanced around as I stretched. I wasn't sure what to do, for I saw no one. I worried for only a moment: where could Damon have gone? I wasn't sure if he would leave me; I thought he would stay. I noticed the needle that me connected to a long pole with wheels from which hung a bag via a vein in my left hand. I figured as long as I took the pole with the bag hanging from it with me, I could walk around and look for Damon. So, I took the pole in my left hand, making sure not to squeeze and make my hand feel uncomfortable, and got out of the hospital bed. I left my room and wandered around the hallways, which were completely deserted. I passed by a few rooms that had patients in them, but they never looked to their open doorways and noticed me simply wandering about. I felt like a ghost as I shuffled down the empty hallways, unnoticed by anyone. It was an odd concept, but it was cathartic in some way because I wasn't in danger. No one was after me because no one was even looking at me as I hobbled through the halls.

I was going down a particularly long hallway that seemed to end in a sharp turn to the left. As I approached this curve in the hall, someone else rounded the hallway's turn at a brisk pace and ran into me.

"Oh! I am so sorry, I –" I began, but stopped mid-sentence when I looked up and saw the face of the man I had run in to. "Stefan?"

Stefan looked down at me, less shocked than I. He smiled his usual half smile, expecting me to ask what he was doing there, but I could only gape as I looked into the face of the man I had once loved.

Then I realized it: I didn't love Stefan anymore. And more than that, we were supposed to be dating at the time, and I was cheating on him. With his own brother! Pangs of guilt hit me like bullets. I stood there, gaping, the realization of what I was doing to these two brothers washing over me, a huge tidal wave that filled me up and drowned me.

Stefan continued to look at me, crossing his arms. Finally, when I had said nothing, he merely greeted me, a hint of contempt in his tone, "Hello, Elena."

I continued to gape as I met his eyes. "Stefan?"

He nodded.

"What are you even . . . doing here?" I asked, every fold of shock resonating throughout my voice.

Stefan smiled wider at me, disdain spreading in his face, as he replied, "Just wanted to check up on you."

"I . . . don't know what to say."

"Clearly."

I rounded the corner of the hallway I had been hurrying down and came face to face with Stefan's back. Just beyond him, I could see an absolutely shocked Elena. Oh, no. I knew that confrontation couldn't be a good thing.

Elena's eyes met mine just beyond Stefan. She gazed at me sternly, worriedly. Stefan turned and met my eyes as well. His expression was filled with hidden scorn. I was temporarily speechless. "Um . . . maybe we should all go talk somewhere," I suggested.

Stefan nodded, and Elena led us back to her hospital room. She gingerly retreated back to her bed, and I moved and adjusted the pole to which her IV was connected. Stefan observed and scrutinized the way Elena and I interacted as we entered the room. I made a painful effort to remain cold and composed towards Elena as we all discussed the things that had taken place.

As soon as we had all settled, Elena immediately spoke the first word, saying, "I'm sorry. I know this entire thing is all my fault."

Stefan shrugged. He crossed his arms and with hidden contempt, replied, "It is. Elena, what the hell were you thinking? I thought . . . I thought you loved me."

Elena looked down at her hands, utterly ashamed. I felt so very guilty. I added, "It's not completely Elena's fault. It's mine as well. I had been . . . coveting her for a long time. And when I even got a hint that she could ever return the feelings, I could only fall truly, deeply, madly in love with her. I'm sorry, Stefan. I know what women have done to us before. I shouldn't have let this happen, but I couldn't help it. I love her. And I've loved her for a very long time now."

Elena looked to me with absolute admiration. Love swam in her eyes, but I couldn't look back into them. Instead, I turned to Stefan. Who seemed completely calm and collected on the inside, but knowing my brother, I could see the torture and pain that eddied just below the surface. I felt guilt for him. Guilt for stealing his girl. Just as he had stolen mine a century and a half ago. "Stefan," I started. "The good in this is that now you can have Katherine without worrying about me."

"I don't want Katherine, Damon. I want Elena. I love her more than I could ever love Katherine," Stefan answered, anger finally bubbling to the surface, overriding his composed façade.

"You don't know that. Maybe you were always made for Katherine."

"I am not made to be with some sadistic, manipulative bitch that I once loved a century ago, Damon! I'm made for Elena. I want Elena, only Elena." There was such anguish in his voice that it caused even more guilt to rise in my throat.

"Stefan, please," Elena warned in a severe voice. "Both of you, calm down!"

"Elena!" Stefan cried.

"Oh, Elena, Elena!" a tinkling voice wafted from the doorway of Elena's hospital room. "Please. Are you Salvatore brothers really arguing over a girl again?" Everyone turned at the sound of the voice and immediately filled with shock when everyone saw Katherine, nonchalantly resting in the threshold. "Oh, don't look so surprised." She mocked as everyone gazed at her, stunned.

Katherine sauntered into the room. Everyone else seemed to be holding their breath. "Katherine," Stefan murmured, acknowledging her.

"Hello, Stefan," she replied playfully with a giggle. She tore herself away from him though, addressing everyone collectively: "So don't I get a say in this?"

I rolled my eyes. "A say in what?" I hissed aggressively.

"In how everyone is being . . . divvied up. I think I want a brother too." She glanced at Stefan who ignored her.

There was silence.

OOOOOooooooOOOOOooooo.

Okay, yeah, I know. I'm not exactly sure where this is going either. Or AM I? Hehe, you'll see. Doesn't mean you shouldn't review! Drop me some reviews, guys :D