The First Gamble

Like the snake said, the room was full of junk. Mountains of broken chairs, twitching old broomsticks, fanged frisbees, and what honestly looked like trash piles. She kept her nose down and her focus on the snake. It led her to a cabinet that she could have found by following the smell of Draco's cologne. The large, broken vanishing cabinet had rosy undertones and smelt like cedar, even though it wasn't.

Siria rose to her feet, as she turned back into a girl. She placed a hand on the cabinet and placed how she knew it. This was the vanishing cabinet Nearly Headless Nick asked Peeves to break in Siria's second year. Someone got shoved in last year, and it sounded like they didn't fair well.

"Where do vanished things go?" Siria wondered. If the cabinet got fixed, then would whatever was inside really disappear or would it go elsewhere. It felt like waking up. Somehow, Draco knew where things went. He was fixing the cabinet to send something somewhere. Unless it worked both ways. If it worked both ways, he wanted to bring something here— or someone.

All she had was time. Siria dropped her bag down then reverted into a dog; it was more comfortable on the floor as a dog than a person. She rested her head and watched the spot. Her mind was so awake, even though she wanted to sleep. Even as a dog, her head was full of things.

Complications. Will be solved.

-P.

Siria shook her head. This is why she was here so early. How many times did she read the letter Dobby gave her? She couldn't take it anymore. Why would Patricia send that? Of all the things, just blind confidence they would figure things out— things. It was "complications" not "a complication", but that the world was crumbling around them and they were going to die. She took a breath.

Dying was one thing. That was always on the table. At least, her own death was always on the table. This was supposed to take it off. Their plan was supposed to take everyone's death off the table. There were already more complications than they thought there could be: the seals had complications, Voldemort had complications, the Horcruxes had complications, relationships had complications, and now the nexus of their plan had complications.

Another breath. All she could do was breathe and wait and hope. Her eyes squeezed shut, as if she could shut out the negative thoughts. As if having her eyes closed would take all the frustration in her heart and seal it off. As if it would make this gamble more likely to succeed...

Draco took his sweet time enjoying his morning before he entered the Room of Requirement. She rose up. Siria hid behind a pile of miscellaneous clothes, which she would rescue from the Room when she could. Draco rushed to the cabinet like he was about to be late to class.

He looked over his shoulders then moved the chair beside the cabinet, and sat. Draco flipped through a book. Even for him, he was pale. They hadn't been in school long, so she supposed the gaunt features could have been from summer. She remembered him healthier on the first night, though. The bags under his eyes had grown. Myrtle did say he wasn't sleeping. Draco bit down on his nail, while he turned the pages.

A breath for confidence, for conviction. She stretched then pounced. Draco gasped as he hit the floor. Her fangs were on his throat until they weren't. Siria pinned him to the ground.

"Just listen! Please! I will let you go, no matter what," Siria promised. His wrists were so thin that her fingers touched. She looked into his cold silver eyes; they were so bloodshot that the red overpowered the flecks of blue. An extra fleck of silver caught her eye, on the floor, the coin pendant. Then the darkness beside it.

"You took the Dark Mark…" Siria didn't even know if it was a question or a statement and it came from her. Draco shook. He tried to knock her off. Siria put more of her weight against him. They were both good Seeker builds, but he was lighter now.

"What if I offered you a solution where no one dies?" Siria asked. "Draco— please! Hear me out. I don't care if you took the Mark, I'm sure you have your reasons, but I want your help."

"The hell you do!" He said and spat on her. Siria gritted her teeth. She wanted to slam her head into his with all her might, but didn't. "You have no idea what he's like!"

"Oh!" Siria gasped with anger. "I don't know what Voldemort— has been hunting me since I was a baby— Voldemort is like? Pray do tell, Draco— what is a genocidal, power-hungry, never grew up, loveless man like? What don't I know? Is he going to kill your friends because they aren't 'Pureblood' or going to murder your family—" Draco shuddered. Siria lost her words.

"Let's help each other, please," Siria said, back in control of her anger. "You said you're not the person I built you up to be, so why don't you let me get to know the person you are? Show me who they are and let me decide if I want to be their friend before you write me off— unless you don't want to be mine."

"I don't," Draco grumbled through clenched teeth.

"So you're just wearing Miran Shacklebolt 'cause he's hot?" Siria asked. It was nice to see some color on Draco's face.

"Anything in the world— if you could have anything in the world, what would it be?" Siria asked. Draco turned his head, flat against the floor. She waited. "I want my loved ones to live happily… you are one of those loved ones. You're my friend. If you can look me in the eye and tell me that you don't want me to be your friend, then I'll leave. I will not tell anyone about the Dark Mark. I will just continue to dedicate myself to stopping Voldemort, and taking down everyone that follows him."

"You'll lose," Draco's lips barely moved as he whispered. "You haven't seen what… you don't know what he's done."

"Okay." Siria said. She let go and rose up.

Without looking at Draco, she swept her bag off the floor. She faced the doors to leave. "Malfoy… I am so sorry we couldn't agree. I'm sorry that I kept bothering you when you said to stay out of your way. I wanted to be there for my friend, but you didn't want to be friends…" Siria squeezed her eyes shut. "I want to say that I won't do it anymore. I will, just in a worse way. If we can't be friends, and you're really standing with Voldemort, then I have to be in your way. I can't let anything go in his favor." She tightened her grip on her bag. "There's too much at stake. I'm sorry."

She walked toward the door. "Please," she thought, "don't do it." To jinx or hex her would only add insult to injury. Was he going to tackle her for revenge? Siria took a breath and braced herself. His arms wrapped around her and she waited for impact...it came differently than she expected.

"Please, Siria," Draco said. He buried his face in her back. His grip was so tight and desperate that it almost hurt. "You found me… please, don't leave me." It hit her. For a moment, she had no words. He was so scared and… "vulnerable?" she supposed that was the word, but it made her heartache.

"It's okay," Siria said and patted his arms. "You're okay, Draco. I'm here with you, and I'm staying, for as long as you want." Something told her that was what to say; it didn't tell her that he would cry.

"Where have you been?" Hermione gasped. She clutched Siria's arm then snapped her hand away when Siria winced. "What happened?"

"Nothing," Siria lied. She glanced at the watching eyes in the common room. "Is Ron here?" Hermione's eyes fluttered. She looked to the ground and shook her head.

"He was looking for you… we wanted to talk," Hermione said. Siria nodded. She turned to leave again. Hermione followed after her. "You see, Ron and I… well, we'll talk together," Hermione said as they walked along.

From opposite sides of the seventh floor corridor, Hermione and Siria entered shortly after Ron did. Ron raised his arm to wave, but dropped his hand as quickly as it went up. He gave Siria a single nod. They met before the unsummoned Room of Requirement.

"Must be pretty big news for you to both want to talk to me," Siria said. She felt she already knew. "Did someone die?"

"No!" Hermione said. "Um," she looked down the corridor. "Let's talk in the Room. We can be comfortable there." Hermione definitely had comfort in mind with the room. It was a miniature version of the Gryffindor common room, with good chairs that didn't look like they had seen generations of students. They settled down around a small round table, in three different armchairs.

"So," Siria said as she leaned back into her chair. She looked at Hermione then Ron.

"So," Ron said. He gripped one of his armrests.

"So," Hermione repeated. "This is comfortable…" she pulled on a smile and looked at Ron.

"Yeah," Siria said. "What was it you wanted to talk about?"

"Where you this morning?" Ron asked. He shifted. "I mean… Hermione is… we're… you know."

"I'm dating Ron," Hermione said. She put her hands in her lap and sat up in her chair.

"Congratulations," Siria said. "But what was it you wanted to talk about?" Hermione and Ron blushed.

"Well… I just thought, you might, you know," Hermione muttered at her lap.

"I might what?" Siria played. She ran her fingers through her hair.

"I don't want you sharing a bed with Hermione anymore," Ron said.

"Okay," Siria agreed. "That's fair and understandable."

"I want to… have a date with Hermione on Friday nights," Ron added. Siria nodded.

"Hermione?" Siria asked.

"It would be nice…" Hermione said. "Even if we just have a study date. If we could also maybe spend part of the time at Hogsmeade alone."

"Sounds good," Siria said. She put her hands on the arms of the chair and pulled herself to her feet.

"Are we going to class?" Siria asked. She stretched out her arms. Siria rose to her toes to stretch her legs while she stood. Her body ached with stiffness.

"Don't you…" Ron looked to Hermione. "Don't you have anything else you want to say?" he asked Siria.

"Are you happy?" Siria asked. Ron and Hermione shared a glance and a blush.

"Yes…" Hermione blushed more.

"We are," Ron said, redder than his hair.

"Then I'm happy for you," Siria said. "You're my best mates, and I want you both to be happy."

Potions was even more sucking up and flattery. Siria was exhausted. She wanted it all to be over. They were so close now. Soon she could go back to being herself. Today showed her that. Somewhere under the fake smiles and heavy handed compliments she didn't believe, she was there.

"Professor," Siria stayed back after class. She looked down as she squeezed the strap of her bag. "I don't know if I should be telling you this," Siria said with her eyes down. Slughorn placed a hand over his stomach.

"What's wrong my dear?" Slughorn asked.

"It's…" Siria looked over her shoulder to make sure no one was in the room. She stepped closer to his desk and dropped her voice. "If you can, I don't think you should invite me anymore."

"My dear, why?" Slughorn asked, clearly surprised.

"It's the Headmaster," she whispered. Slughorn took a step back and Siria had to look down as she fought the urge to smirk. "He wants me to get close to you. I don't know why, but it certainly can't be good for you." She raised her head to meet his eye. "You've been so good to me. I should've know he had something planned when he brought me to meet you. I was so silly," she shook her head. "I hoped it was so I'd have someone that knew my mother in my life, but…" Siria blinked back the tears. "But I should've known better."

Slughorn put an arm around her shoulder. "My dear girl," Slughorn said, "this isn't your fault. I won't kick you out of the Slug Club because of Albus. It must have been hard for you to carry that." He pulled on a brave smile. "You're more like your mother than you think, and I would be a fool to spend less time with you because of things out of your control. My office will always be open."

"Thank you," Siria sniffled. She dabbed at her eyes with her sleeve.

It hurt to know how fake she could get. Now she could even make herself cry. Siria pulled on a smile as she sat down for lunch with Dennis. She wanted to vomit. She was no different than Dumbledore. He was Plan B though, and they needed a back up plan. Miran Shacklebolt sent her a smile that made her blush. She wanted to tell him to give them to someone who deserved them or had the time for them. Dennis tugged on her sleeve. "Siria, are you going to ask him out?" Dennis asked. She pinched his cheeks.

"And lose more time with you?" She smiled wider. "C'mon, you haven't touched your greens."

"Sorry," Neville said behind Dennis and Siria, as they were wrapping up. They scooted closer so he could sit beside Siria. "Um, I think Theodosia is sick," Neville said. "She's lost a lot of quills."

"Your glowbally thing?" Siria asked while Neville pulled opened his little pouch. He dug out some light from his pocket and showed it to Siria. Siria took out her own pouch. She held it beside Neville's. The little balls shifted around, then Siria's jumped into Neville's pouch.

"Maybe yours is lonely?" Siria asked. "What do you mean it's lost quills?" she eyed them. Neville pointed to the little light in his hand.

"Can you see yours?" Neville asked. "It's not really just light. They're really cute. Theodosia has these tiny, little black eyes and the cutest nose. I didn't see it until a few weeks ago, but I don't know what do."

"Neville, can you draw what Theodosia looks like?" Siria asked. "I might be able to get some help, if I can figure out what they are." Hermione had enough contacts that someone would be able to identify it.

"Can I hold it?" Dennis asked. Siria reached to grab hers.

",,,Neville, which is which?" Siria asked.

"Oh," Neville took Siria's out and handed it to her. She passed it to Dennis. "It's weird because I can't see yours as clearly as I see Theodosia. What did you name yours?"

"I haven't."

"Oh."

"It's warm," Dennis said with a small laugh. "It's funny, I'm not so nervous about my test." He handed Siria back the glowball. "Thanks for having lunch with me, P.B."

"Every Monday, I promised."

Halloween brought the first Hogsmeade trip. Hermione and Ron went around, as they wanted to. Siria arranged to meet Cedric. They walked through the village, arm in arm, while he caught her up with what he had been up to. It was nice. That was the only word Siria could think of for it. To just be, no fake smiles or school work, just a day away from it.

"What about you?" Cedric asked. "I know there's no way you're just sitting in the castle, buried under schoolwork." Siria placed her hand on her chest in mock-injury.

"I happen to be very dedicated, Mr. Diggory," Siria smiled. "My studies are my passion, my life."

"And what are you studying, Ms. Potter-Black?" Cedric mirrored her smile. He had such a good smile. If a smile could win the war, it would be his.

"Nothing that I've made enough progress in to report to you," Siria said. He raised an eyebrow that assured her otherwise. "The Dementor Killer is still no further. The Tale of Two Brothers is closer than ever, but I won't know for sure until I try it, and it's too risky to just try until I've taken care of Voldemort. Nagini will be the real test. Despite my studies in persuasion, I can't use them on the Minister if he won't approach me—"

"What?" Cedric asked. He paused, as did Siria. "The Minister has written you, several times since summer."

"What?" Siria asked. "I haven't gotten anything from him since the meeting." Cedric wouldn't lie to her though. He was honest.

"Father asked if I knew anything… I…" a light blush crossed Cedric's nose. "I told my father that if the Minister was being ignored, he must have done something to earn it."

"Dumbledore," Siria cursed. She clenched her fists. "It is one thing to want to know my plan, but it is another entirely to thwart mine."

"You still don't trust him?" Cedric asked. "It's fine. I suppose I just don't understand."

"Dumbledore kept a close eye on Young Voldemort, but never tried to interfere or help him," Siria said. "If you're in a position of power and you don't exercise it to help people and try to prevent Dark Wizards, why do you even have that power? So you can wait decades for some poor little orphan girl to die at his feet and have someone else murder him?" She shook her free hand. "Dumbledore may have a point with not announcing his plans, but there's a reason he's plan b— and why it won't matter. Today will show that."

"Today?" Cedric asked. Siria let out a sorry sigh.

"I can't tell you. I'm so sorry, Cedric," she added. "Until this goes well, I can't risk someone overhearing."

Cedric glanced around, a playful glitter of light in his eyes. He slid his arm from Siria's grasp to put it around her shoulder. Cedric kissed her on the head. "I suppose your fan club is still within sight," he whispered. "I trust you."

They continued their walk and Siria continued to tell him about the little progress she made in her other projects. Sometimes it was just good to get them out, to force things into words and hear them. At one point, she pulled out the glowball. Cedric laughed. "Well, he clearly likes you more because that looks nothing like a Blast-Ended Skrewt," he told her. "I do see what you mean about the emotional effects. While there wasn't something directly bothering me, I do feel better and in a different way than seeing my girlfriend." Cedric held it. "Still no idea?" Siria shook her head. "Longbottom can see his, but he's the only one so far?"

"The only one I know of," Siria said.

"Maybe he's doing something the rest of you all aren't," Cedric said. "They're clearly like Thestrals, in that there's got to be a requirement to see them. You see death to see Thestrals, maybe you need to see something only Neville has to see these." Siria planted a kiss on the tip of his nose.

"How did I get someone so smart to date me?" Siria grinned.

"Something about you being kinder than you give yourself credit for and more determined to do good than anyone else I know," he said. "You're cute too, and that certainly helps." Siria blushed and wrinkled her nose. Cedric let out a laugh. "That only makes you cuter." She put her hand over her face.

"Oh, shut it," Siria muttered.

They walked back toward the path to Hogwarts and waited. Cedric insisted Siria not go back alone, though she doubted very much that Voldemort would attack her here. "My dear girl," Slughorn called and waved as he approached them.

"Professor," Siria pulled on a smile without an effort, and it hurt. "It's always so good to see you." Cedric placed a hand on the small of her back. He knew this wasn't who Siria was.

"Cedric Diggory," Cedric introduced himself and shook Slughorn's hand. "Thank you for encouraging Siria to submit the Solution. She's brilliant and I'm glad there's someone to talk her humility down."

"Cedric," Siria whispered through her teeth, mouth frozen in a smile.

"It is my pleasure, she is quite the gem," Slughorn beamed at Siria. "Are you heading back to the castle, my dear? I would love to accompany you."

"Thank you," Siria said. She kissed Cedric on the cheek. "Talk soon." He wrapped her in a hug to whisper into her ear.

"It is fine to feel that you have to be this person. You are more than enough as you are, though" he said. Her heart sank through the ground, as he let go.