I sighed at what I had planned today-nothing.
I was starting to get up when I felt someone restrain me. I looked down to see Edwards arms not moving, and looked over to see him staring at me. "Edward, I have to go to the restroom." I whined.
He heaved a long sigh. "I wanted to stay in bed."
"Then stay!" I told him crossly.
"I meant with you. Now let's go." I shot him a look. "Hey! I'm just leading you to the door."
I rolled my eyes at him. "Right, like you just were walking me to my room... or maybe how you were just making sure I got home alright!" I said sarcastically. That was his excuse that night, he was just making sure I got home alright, because I had too much to drink. Right, as if he hadn't had anything that night.
His grip didn't loosen. "Do you REALLY think I'm like that."
I looked him up and down. "Yes and no..."
He griminced. "Care to explain?"
"You can be a perv and a player." I jerked my arm away and walked off. I was that mad, for no appearent reason.
He was there leaning his foot against the wall, smirking when I came out.
I glared at him.
"So, do you want to go out for ice cream today?" He smiled at me.
"No, I'm going out for ice cream tomorrow with Mark and Kate." His smile fell a bit.
"OKay...pizza?"
"Sorry, I don't want any pizza." His smile fell a fraction more.
"The movies?"
"There's nothing good there." He wasn't smiling at all anymore, and his eyes looked sad and hurt.
I walked up to him and hugged him. "Listen, I know you're trying really hard to spend time with me. Let's just watch a movie here. I'll have Alice go pick one up for us." He hugged me back and laughed.
"I'd like that! Alice!" Alice came prancing in the room.
"Will you pick us up a movie?" She nodded.
"Sure! Anything for the parents of my beautiful neice or nephew!" and she bounced out. I saw Jasper was there at her side. The took hands and walked down the stairs and out the door.
Edward looked at the clock on the table. "It's ten." He said, and led me back to bed.
"I'm sick of the bed!"
"You're on bed rest." He smiled his crooked smile at me. Always his crooked smile.
"Name one good thing about it." I pouted.
"Me." He shrugged. I rolled my eyes.
He led me back to the bed, and tucked me in, same as last time. Only this time he crawled around me and got under the covers without asking. And then I felt an arm slide over my stomach and start rubbing it carefully. It felt really good and the baby kicked a few times. I even found myself in his arms, having gotten closer while he was rubbing my stomach. I didn't realize how much time had passed until Alice had returned.
"I got Blood and Chocolate!" She cheered happily. Edward started to get up. "Don't get up, now!" She added smiling. Edward gladly went back to holding me, and put his hand back under my shirt to my stomach. Alice pranced right back out the door without another word, to be met by Jasper, with home she left with, holding hands again, to her room. I knew they had picked up a movie for them as well.
I had seen this movie before, and was bored. I guess Edward felt the same way because he started to talk to me. Maybe that was Alice's goal.
"So, whens our daughter due?" He asked.
"In two weeks she'll be a month." I answered.
"Right... so... why did you pick the name Tallie?"
"I don't know." I shrugged. "How do you know the Travis'?" I asked curiously.
"Old friends of my parents from before I was born. We haven't seen them in years." He shrugged.
"Why aren't you in school?" I looked up at him. "Why isn't Jasper for that matter? Or Alice. We're all supposed to be in college now. I know Rose and Emmett aren't here."
"Jasper and Alice are taking a year off." He shrugged again. "I love you Bella. I've loved you a long time. For years." I was too stunned to speak. He just suddenly claimed he'd loved me for a long time. Did I believe him?
"Why are you telling me this now?" I asked scathingly.
He didn't answer me, but his grip tightening involintarily around my stomach. My fragile state was begining to slide under the pressure of it.
"Edward..." I said dizzily. He released me,m realizing his mistake.
"Oh, Bella... I'm sorry..." His words slurred, and I realized that was me.
"Bella!" I heard him scream, and moments before I hit darkness, "CARLISLE!"
I woke up to someone lightly stroking my face, and someone holding my hand. And then I heard a voice. "Carlisle, is she going to be alright? How's the baby? It's been eight hours. Are they going to be alirght?" I heard Edwards voice cry. He sounded really pained and scared, and I wondered how I could realize all this in my sleepy fog.
"They should be fine." Carlisle tried to shoote him.
"It's all my fault Carlisle. I gripped her too tightly." He cried.
"It's not your fault Edward, it was an accident." I heard ... Alice's voice say.
"It's still my fault. My actions my fault." I wanted to call to him, to tell him to stop beating himself up, but I couldn't find my voice.
"She's right Edward. It'll be okay. They'll be okay." Jasper... that was his voice now.
"Listen to them Edward." Carlisle told him wisely.
Then I felt someone leaned over. I realized it was Edward holding my hand and stroking my face. "I'm so sorry, Bella. So sorry." He whispered only to me, and kissed my forehead.
And I fell back into my slumber.
I regained concious again. I heard voices murmering, and I heard a relieved sigh.
"She'll be alright now, Edward. She's in the clear." I heard a smile in this persons voice.
"Thank you, Carlisle. Thank you." Edwards voice was filled with relief completely.
I heard footsteps and a door close, and I thought everyone had left me.
Then some footsteps made it around to the other side of the bed and someone got in the bed with me. And then arms encircled me and rested on my stomach. It was Edward.
"I'm sorry Bella. I know you probably don't want me near you anymore, but I can't leave you alone tonight. I'm so sorry." He wept tearlessly, his face buried in my hair.
"What time is it?" I asked, not really realizing I was speaking, lifting my head up to him.
I barely heard his reply, I was so out of it. "It's twelve baby, go back to bed." He whispered, relive to have proof I was okay.
I was asleep before my head hit the pillow.
I woke up to feel arms tightly and securely around me again. This time I didn't try to get up.
Even though it wasn't good for me, I turned around to my other side to face Edward, and I hugged myself closer to him. His arms tightened around me.
"I'm so glad you're okay, Bella." He whispered into my hair again. "I was so afraid." He sobbed.
"It's okay Edward. It's okay. It wasn't your fault." I promised him.
"Thank you. For forgiving me. I didn't mean to hurt you again. I promised-"
"And I promised you I'm not blaming you. It was an accident." He felt him smile.
"You're so good to me. Thank you."
"Stop saying that Edward!"
"Okay. Oh, and Bella, don't forget, you have to meet the Travis' today." I sighed.
"Yeah I know." I got up. "I'm going to go get Alice." I smiled.
His smiled warmed. "She's been waiting to talk to you for hours now."
"Glad I could make her happy." I laughed, and headed to Alices' room.
"Alice?" I knocked. "Alice?" She still didn't respond so I went in. "Alice, why aren't you-" I stopped in mid sentence. Alice and Jasper were in her bed. I surpressed a laugh so I wouldn't wake them up.
Jasper was on her bed spred out dead center like he was doing jumping jacks, only with one arm around Alice, and Alice was spread out horizontally across his stomach, but was curled up to his cheek. I don't know why I found it so amusing, because it really wasn't funny at all, but it was the most hillarious thing in the world to me.
"Alice! Jasper!" I yelled, quietly enough that I wouldn't wake anyone else up, or if they were already awake, I wouldn't alarm them.
Alice and Jasper shot straight up and literally lifted 4 feet in the air and landed sitting up. I don't know how they managed to do that.
"Have a nice night?" I teased, smiling widely.
"Bella! You're alright!" Alice cried, running over to me, and hugging me lightly, careful not to hurt my stomach. I hated that I was so fragile, that the slightest pressure sent me dizzy.
"And you and Jasper are cuter then ever!" I hugged her.
Jasper came over and hugged me, then took Alice and lifted her up, like you would lift a little kid when you were carrying them to bed. Alice rested her head on his neck and sighed.
"I suppose I have to let go of Jasper and help you get dressed and do your make up for you?"
"No, I don't need make up, and you could just tell me what to wear. Go on letting him hold you. It's so cute!" Okay, I admit, I was obsessed with them. They were really cute together.
"Okay!" She cheered. "Jasper! Onto Bellas closet!" She commanded.
"Right away Miss!" he smiled and he carried Alice to my room and into my closet and I followed.
I heard music blast from upstairs and knew Edward was up there probably trying to forget what I was about to do.
Alice picked me out a red shirt with birds and roses on it, and capris. I had this whole wardrobe of maternity clothes thanks to Alice.
"Bella! Hurry! You're going to be late if you don't get a move on!" Esme called.
"Coming!" I called back, and Alice got off of Jasper to help me down the stairs. "Sure, you don't get down until you have to help me down the stairs." I laughed. She just shrugged and took Jaspers hand, her face so in love when she looked at him, it made me melt with happiness.
"Come on Bella, I'll drive you." Esme smiled. I was about to argue, but I knew she was right. I was in no state to drive.
10 minutes later we were at the park, and we came up to Mark and Kate sitting on the bench.
"Oh Bella! We're glad you're okay! Carlisle told us what happened!" Kate cried.
"Yes, I'm fine. Thanks for worrying, but I hope I didn't scare you too bad." I smiled. Or tried to.
"No, we're glad you're okay." Then she noticed Alice. "Oh! Will Alice be joining us today?" She chirped.
I looked at Alice who smiled and shook her head. "I'm sorry, but I can't. I have too much to do today."
"Alright. But don't be a stranger." Mark told her.
"I won't! I promise!" She smiled and skipped away. Or floated, whatever works better.
Kate turned to me. "Well, lets go get ice creamed." And we slowly made our way to the ice cream vendor.
"Um... bubble gum snow cone?" I asked more then I said.
Kate smiled. "The great divide."
"I'll take the sherbert one." Mark said eagerly.
"Sherberts his favorite." Kate explained.
Kates smile was always as warm as she looked-which was like Esme, only taller and skinnier. Mark looked like a cross between my father, stern, powerful, and scary looking, and Carlisle, warm and sweet. I completely trusted my daughter with these two.
We made our way over to a bench and sat.
"Seeing me this young and pregnant probably gave you a bad impression." I told them, looking to the ground.
"Well it's a little young, but it's alright. We don't think you're a bad person. Besides, you've lived with the Cullens for a long time. Anyone they let under their roof are kind people. The kindest and most hospitable we've ever come across." Kate said.
I looked at them questioningly. "What do you mean?" I asked.
"Well, we didn't have a great start. We started off dirt poor, and this was before Emmett was born by a few years, Carlisle took us in andd let us stay until we got on our feet." Marks eyes sparkled proudly.
"What do you do now?"
"Oh, we do this and that. He's a lawyer, I teach sometimes. Sometimes I sell things. Sometimes I stay at home. He writes books, I sell things I make. We have a very good income now." Kate patted my hand.
I nodded, and looked into the forest.
"I like camping, don't you guys?" I said dreamily. I was already imagining hiking through it agin one day.
"Oh yeah, we go hiking once every few months." Mark said.
We continued to get to know each other for about 2 more hours. We walked aroudn the park, and on the fountain, and fed ducks. All too soon Alice was here to pick me up and take me home.
Over the next two weeks I had seen Mark and Kate 10 more times. We sometimes were at their house, where I watched movies with them or knitted with Kate, or we went to the movies or some where else to have fun, but they never went to the Cullen house.
And over these two weeks I was getting closer to Edward. In fact, except for 3 long nights, he slept in the same bed as me every night. Though I'm pretty sure even though I was half asleep I felt him sneak into bed with me at the dead of night and crawl out before I woke up.
I was begining to think that reconsidering this whole adoption thing was a good idea. That maybe Edward could handle being a dad. He was being so responsible with me, helping me change and eat. And he wasn't being obnoxious. He hadn't been since he beat me up. No one in this house, nor Mark and Kate, ever brought that up again. He was totaly protective of me. No man could come within 25 ft of me. If it was five feet, and it wasn't just walking by me on the street, which rarely happened, with people bumping me, and saying sorry, but if it was something more, he wrapped his arm around me and they left me alone.
So I thought we were golden and I was going to tell him I was reconsidering. I had even called Maddie and told her I wasn't considering leaving anymore. That his being protective wasn't bothering me so badly anymore.
Then I walked into his room one day. It was a mistake.
"E..Ed... Ed-ward?" I sobbed. I had stood there for a few minutes and watching him macking with this other girl, going unnoticed I was so speechless. His hands were up her shirt, and she had unbottoned the top part of his shirt.
He shot straight up, and I saw Heather.. or Kasey.. or Paula... or Laura... or whatever her name was.
"Bella!" He yelped.
Tears came to my eyes. I knew this was too good to be true. I shook my head violently, willing it to go away. It was a nightmare, only a nightmare. I had just come back from visiting Mark and Kate. But I had surely fallen asleep.
"Let me explain, Bella, please. I-" He begged. My little begger boy. But I shook my head feircely, and yelled.
"No! NO! JUST GET AWAY FROM ME YOU STUPID SLUTTY PLAYER!" Tears blocked my vision. "And you! You stupid slutty woman! Have a good life with him." I didn't care what it would do to me. I started running. Before I finished running down the stairs to the floor my room was on, I felt horrible pains in my stomach.
I didn't care about the baby. The baby didn't matter anymore. All I knew was I had to get out.
"Bella! What happened!" Alice yelled. At this point, I was gripping my stomach, panting, and crying out in pain, both physically and emotionally.
"Edwards... cheated... on me... he was macking... this other girl all... up and dow..down..." I sobbed.
"JASPER!" Alice yelled. He was by her side in a second. "Stay here with Bella. I have to go kill my brother." He nodded and her face turned more grave then it already was. "Don't let her escape. Not again." And he nodded again. This time his stance got straighter. I knew he wasn't even going to let me out of his sight. I was not to put Alice under that stress and pain again, and he wasn't going to make sure I didn't.
But right now, I couldn't handle this firm Jasper. I needed my best friend. "Ja-Jasper. Stop being so firm." I cried. He gave me a sad look and relaxed his stance. "Help.. m..me inside my..r..room..." I swayed violently, as he ran to my side, opened my door and laid me on my bed. "I promise I won't put Alice through that again. Okay Jasper, I promise. I just need the Jasper who is my best friend. Please, bring him back." I said, working through the trembling I always got after I cried. I saw a spark light in Jaspers eyes, and I knew he was going to be my best friend again.
"It's okay Bella. Alice will get him for you." Jasper promised me.
"Thank you Jasper. You're a really great friend." Jaspers smile appeared.
"You know, you and Alice are cute together. You'll make it, no matter what happens." I promised.
"I know." He told me, digging in his pocket. He took out his hand, and revealed a case.
"Jasper!" I breathed excitedly. I knew was it was.
He opened it, and a beautiful ring was there. It wasn't huge, but it wasn't small and invisible. It was the perfect size for me and Alice. We weren't the type for those huge rings with the huge dimonds that gold diggers wore. This ring had a dimond center, with small dimonds all around it, and a gold ring set. The most beautiful engagement ring I'd ever seen.
"Oh Jasper! It's perfect! She'll love it!" I cried and hugged him. "But she'll love you more. She'll always love you." I smiled so hugely, so proud of my two best friends in the world, that I forgot about Edward.
"I know! That's why I am going to ask her. I just have to wait for the perfect time.
Then pounding came to the door. And screaming. Lots of screaming. "BELLA! BELLA! PLEASE LET ME IN! PLEASE LET ME EXPLAIN!" I couldn't take it, I exploded.
"EXPLAIN WHAT! THOSE WERE YOUR OWN ACTIONS! THERES NOTHING TO EXPLAIN!"
"BELLA!"
"NO! THERES NOTHING TO EXPLAIN! YOU CHOSE TO DO THAT! I GET IT! YOU JUST CAN'T STAY WITH ME! GO ON AND HAVE A GOOD LIFE!" I screamed. I was getting so dizzy. I'd never been this dizzy.
I got up, only to fall on Jasper and have him support me with his whole body. I was aware of the sharp pain in my stomach getting worse and worse and worse. Blackness started to cloud over me.
I was aware that I was eight months pregnant, and possibly about to loose the child.
I heard Jasper scream at Edward and Alice. "GET CARLISLE NOW!" His voice boomed, louder than mine and Edwards could ever reach.
As he said this, the banging immediatly stopped and I heard footsteps pounding in two differant directions looking for their father.
Then I heard something banging the door full force.
"Jasper, open the door." Carlisle said, the calmness faltering in his voice.
"I can't! I have to support Bella. I can't set her down, I have to stay like this. Just bang the door down." He instructed.
And I heard something crash to the ground.
And then I fainted. Again.
"She's so fragile Edward. You know this. The slightest thing can make her dizzy. Why did you do that to her?" I heard an angry womans voice, strained from trying not to yell.
"I didn't know she was home. I didn't want her to know." I heard a loud sound. It sounded like a slap.
"How long have you been doing this behind Bella's back?" I was fearful of the womans voice, even though it wasn't even directed at me.
The man sighed. "Since Bella started to go see Kate and Mark." I heard a bang from another direction and a yelp.
"Alice! Don't hit me!" The man said.
"Edward! You stupid perv! Bella's pregnant with your child, and you're out there being with every other girl in the state. WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU!" Alice screamed the last part.
"I-" Jasper cut him off.
"We don't want to hear it. How could you." It wasn't a question that came from Jaspers mouth.
"You're a sick man." I identified the first womans voice as Maddies.
I knew Edward had betrayed me and I felt stupid for trusting him. I had to get out of here.
"Everyone, leave. It's time for another check on Bellas status." I heard Carlisle say.
"But-" I heard Edward start.
"Especially you Edward. Now, you all need to eat, okay." I heard footsteps and I assumed everyone had left the room.
"Carlisle, please let me stay with Bella." I heard Maddie plead.
"Very well." He said.
I felt various proddings and some noises. "Alright. She and the baby are still alright. How the baby survived this far, I will probably never know. But they're alright."
"Thank you, Carlisle. Thank you so much." Maddie said relieved.
I heard footsteps leave and I heard Maddie whisper.
"Oh Bella, I'm so sorry I should have known not to leave you alone with him." She said, saddness and anger filling her voice.
I opened my eyes to see her looking at me with concern. She was the only one left in the room.
"Oh Bella!" She cried, when she saw my eyes open.
"Maddie." I croaked. She smiled. "Maddie." I said again, letting the pain fill my voice.
"What is it Bella?" She was worried.
"Please, get me out of here. Please. I can't be here. I want to go somewhere. I don't want to be found." I told her, my voice cracking in several places.
"Okay Bella. But how are wer supposed to get out of here?"
"Just get me out." I sighed.
She nodded. "But do you really think that's a good idea? You could lose the-" I glared at her and she shut up. "Alright Bella, we'll try." She sighed.
So she opened the door, and waited till everyone dissapeared. There was a straight shot to the elevators, when she un-hooked me and rushed me out as the thing went beeping.
"Come on, come on, come on!" She chanted, shaking from the adrinaline. The elevator pinged open and she rolled me in. "My car is out there, we'll take that." She looked at me. "You DO know that this is a criminal offense right? If they catch me.." She couldn't continue, the consiquences too dire.
"Thank you. Thanks for risking all this." I sighed content. I couldn't wrap my head around the danger because of all the drugs, and she knew this, I could tell, by patting my hand sympathetically.
"Don't worry, the drugs won't hurt the baby." She assured me as realization hit me. I nodded.
She hid me behind a column, and when the coast was again clear, she wheeled me, or ran me, out the door, and loaded me into her car.
When I was secure, she sped off.
And we drove all the way to Forks, WA.
"Maddie! Maddie it's time!" I screamed. Maddie came running into my room.
"Maddie, my water just broke." I smiled. "I can't believe I made it! I made it to nine months!" I cheered.
"Don't get to happy, you still have to make it through the birth." Maddy reminded me.
"Don't worry. Everything will be fine. And compared to all I've been through the past seven months, this will be nothing." I smiled happily. I felt so giddy. I was finally going to have the baby. She would be safe.
After I left, we contacted the office to tell them we were now in Forks, and to tell them, only to find someone else was going to adopt my child. But they trusted the person adopting my child and I didn't question it.
"Right.. um... we need... what do we need... oh forget everything... come on Bella!" Maddie was a worse wreck than I was.
"Calm down, Maddie!" I soothed her.
"Right. Car, let's get in the car." And Maddie rushed out the door without me, and I saw her get in the car and drive away.
Even though I know I should be paniked because I was having the baby, and the pains were hurting, I thought it was hillaroius how she forgot me. Like in all those movies where the father forgets. When she was around the corner, I decided she didn't notice and I called her.
She picked up first ring.
"Hello" she squeaked.
"Yeah, Um.. Maddie, I'm still in the house."
I heard her yell a cuss word and the tires squeaked.
Then I heard sirens and her yelling at an officer.
"I have to get my friend to the hospital. She's having a baby!" She screamed.
"Oh yeah, and where's your friend?" He said smugly.
"At home! I forgot her! I don't have time for this!" I heard her hit the gas pedal and leave him there. I laughed quietly at how flustered she was, not even realizing she had probably just commited a crime.
Her car fishtailed around to face the direction of the hospital, she opened the door and she ran up the steps to me. Taking my hand she carefully led me down the steps, and into the car, but she slammed the door getting in on her side, and sped off once I was secured by the seat belt.
We arrived at the hospital 5 minutes later.
"BELLAS IN LABOR!" Maddie screamed.
The nurse at the desk just looked at her calmly, as if she got this all the time. "Just fill this out please." She handed Maddie a form. Maddie jerked it out of the womans hand, accidently of course, it was just her nervousness and excitement. According to the womans look, she also got this kind of thing all the time. Maddie scribled everything and handed it to the nurse.
Another nurse came out and called Bella in, and gave her a private room.
"Relax, Maddie. I'm sure everything will be fine." I assured her.
"Oh I know, this is just exciting. Do I get to be in there, Bella? Please!" She looked like a sad puppy dog, her eyes growing just like Alice's when she really wanted something.
I laughed. "Sure."
"Um.. not that I'm complaining, but Bella... usually woman in labor are mad and in pain and screaming." She said hesitantly.
I shrugged. "It's not that bad. I've had worse."
Maddie smiled. "I know."
An hour later, I was about to give birth.
"Alright Bella, you're ten centimeters. Let's bring this baby into the world." The doctor said, smiling.
"Can I come with her doc? She said I could!" Maddie chirped excited.
"Yes, of course." The doctor noded.
Maddie followed me into the room where I was going to be delievering the little girl that would go to some unknown family. They wouldn't tell me who. I thought it was better that way, and so did Maddie.
"Alright, Bella, now on your next contraction I want you to push." I nodded. I hardly felt them.
Then another nurse came in. "Why are you so late?" The man who was delievering the baby said.
"Sorry, I had to help with something else." I heard him say, his voice muffled from the mouth cover. The main doctor, Dr. Trampley, I think, nodded.
"Very well."
This doctor came to the side Maddie wasn't on, and took my hand. I had a few drugs in me, but I thought I was coheirent. Then I saw his hair, which looked bronze in this light, and the eyes that looked striking green. I shook it off. Edward was in New Hampshire, not here. And I didn't want him here. So why was I thinking he was? Then a memory hit me.
"Edward! You're so funny!" I laughed as he made a face at me.
"I know." He told me and stuck his tounge out.
I shoved him playfully.
It was his tenth birthday today.
I was still nine.
"So, my parents were talking about naming babies again. Turns out this girl down the street and her husband are having a baby." I gushed.
"Right." He nodded hesitantly.
"Do you know what you're going to name your kids?" I asked, swining my legs. We were sitting on his roof.
"Um.. if it's a boy... Edward or Jason... or maybe Orion..." He thought hard. "If it's a girl Bella or Breanna." He shrugged. "Maybe Mercedes."
I laughed. "Like the car! What kinds of names are those. And why Bella! Or Edward for that matter!" I teased.
"Go on then! You're so quick to judge me. What would you name your kid." He asked.
"John for a boy and Tallie for a girl." I said matter of factly.
"Tallie? That's an odd name. Where'd you get that?" His tone said I was crazy. I just shrugged.
"And you thought my names were odd." He mumbled.
"I like it." I told him.
"Good thing the things we name our kids always change. I wonder what I'll want to name my kid in.." he counted on his fingers, "... 10 ten years... Or when I actually have a kid." He laughed.
I shrugged again. "I'll always name my daughter Tallie."
He just laughed at me, and soon I joined in as we looked at the stars.
As I pushed, the hand tightened around me, as mine squeezed both the man and Maddies. After 5 pushes, I heard a baby scream, and the male nurse on my right let out a sigh. I could have sworn I saw him smile triumphantly under his face mask.
As the lethargy from the birth washed over me, and they wheeled me back, I could have sworn I saw said nurse come in and whisper to me. "I promised I'd be here."
I was standing outside the viewing window, looking at my daughter. She hadn't yet been picked up by whoever was adopting her.
Her hair was curly and brown, kind of like mine, just a lighter shade. It still would glow red, even at a few hours, in the light I noticed. But it was a lighter golden shade. I assume a mixture of the bronze and my red brown hair. She had a whole head of hair. Her eyes had opened, and they were blue, like any babies. She was 6 pounds and 4 ounces. A little light for a baby but considering all she went through, she was really healthy.
The name tag on her cradle said "Baby Swan". That was going to change any time now.
I felt a tap on my shoulder, and a man from the adoption agency appeared.
"Ms. Swan, the people who are going to adopt your child are here." I nodded. "Would you like to hold your baby one last time?" He asked.
"I didn't know I could." I told him.
He smiled. "Normally, we don't. But we had a request to offer it to you. Plus a lot of parent are with their child before they leave them with us. You've known yours only hours." I nodded.
They brought me to my room so I could hold my baby. She gripped the locket that was around my neck, and just held it. That was unusual for new borns. They didn't notice anything. Maybe she didn't realize it.
"Excuse me sir, but may I leave my locket with her?" I don't know why I asked him if she could keep it, but I did. It was a gift from my grandmother, and I was about to give it to my daughter if he'd let me.
"Certainly." He smiled and walked over to me.
Maddie was there. She unhooked the locket for me and gave it to the man.
"I'll give this to the new parents and tell them it's for her." He walked away.
"It'll be okay, Bella. You can do this." Maddie coached me.
"Don't worry. I know Maddie." I smiled up at her. "I'll be easy." Maddie doubted me.
"No, it won't be easy! You're giving away your daughter! Where's your maternal instincts? Where's the begging to change your mind?" She asked curiously.
I shrugged. "I just know what's right."
Maddie sighed and shook her head, and the man appeared again. "Alright. They're all ready for her. They asked if you wanted to know what they were going to name her. An unusual request, but then nothing abou this is usual." He said gently.
"No thank you. Just make sure she gets to them alright." I smiled. I felt bare without my necklace, but I knew it was going to go to a good place.
I watched my daughter walk around the corner, and out of view. I sighed content.
I had already changed into my yellow top and pants. I just had to put my yellow flip flops on, and I cliped a yellow clip in my hair, pulling it back.
"Wow!" Maddie laughed, "You look like a sunflower!" She smiled. I laughed with her.
"Yeah, I know! I feel happy! I know I shouldn't, but I feel like a thousand weights were just lifted off me!" I hooked my arm with hers. I was already starting to lose what little weight I had gained. "Let's go!" I cheered, smiling.
"A thousand weights indeed. We're going to have to get you into classes to get that extra stomach off of you!" She laughed at me.
"I know!" I shrugged. I had a habit of that.
"What about your daughter. Aren't you sad at all?" Maddy asked.
I sighed. "I am. I am sad that I had to give her up, and I know lots of people would probably be mad at me. But you have to see this from my side. I want her to not grow up tormented by her parents past. To not deal with people like her father. She's better off without me." I confinded.
Maddie just shook her head. "Bella, you are one weird person." She laughed.
"I know!" I said happily and proudly. "And I'm never going to change." I chanted.
We walked outside and let the freedom of the outside engulf us.