When Eric woke up, he was dressed down in his boxers and curled into a very warm comforter. He opened his eyes a fraction and inhaled the furred texture. It smelled like Kyle. Even the window placement was all wrong. This wasn't his room.

Eric tilted his head up from the pillow and looked through the frosted glass. Snow was coming down in full force today. He could even hear the wind howl gently against the walls. Only an idiot with a death wish would want to venture outside today.

Too exhausted and lazy to check his surroundings, he bundled the blanket up to his chin and tried to sleep again. Eric had hoped - prayed - that everything had been a bad dream. He didn't almost murder Heidi. Kyle didn't hate him.

Something shifted to his right. It was only when he turned did he discover that he was in Kyle's room again.

His lover's breathing wasn't as labored like usual. A thrum of utter guilt hit him hard. Kyle always fell into a deep sleep around him because he used to trust Eric. Not anymore. Not from the way he had behaved last night. Kyle had made it very clear on the ride back that he didn't know how he could 'fix' what was wrong with him.

Eric grit his teeth hard and tried to suppress another sob. He ruined this. Kyle's safe space was gone. It was all his fault.

When Eric tentatively reached out and brushed the bandage on Kyle's shoulder, those green eyes instantly snapped open. That hurt more than anything else in this world. His fears came to life. Kyle didn't trust him and there was nothing he could do about it.

"I'm sorry…" Eric whimpered and pressed his lips against the wound. "You can't sleep around me anymore. I'm so sorry, Kyle. I don't know what…"

"I guess that shit was going to happen sooner or later." Kyle's response was hoarse. Maybe he slept a little deeper than he expected. Eric held onto a bit of hope when Kyle's hand came up and slid down his arm. It wasn't much, but for Kyle he might as well be shushing him and collecting him into his arms. "How do you feel?"

"Bad. I've never felt so bad in my life." Eric slipped under Kyle's arm and nuzzled his chest. "I don't want to remember it. But… I feel glad."

Kyle paused. "Glad?"

"I want to protect you, Kyle," Eric said softly. "That's why… that's why it happened. I didn't want them to get away with it. I hurt them, Kyle. I'm… I'm capable of doing it." He lifted his head up and peppered Kyle's lips with kisses. "But I'd never hurt you. Never, Kyle. Never. I love you so much…"

"I know you do," Kyle replied before he flipped them over. His reciprocation was to deepen the kiss and press Eric into the sheets until they were buried in pillows and comforters. A soft sigh of pleasure left Eric's lips until Kyle devoured it completely.

This was heaven. Pure, sinless heaven, and Eric didn't feel like he deserved it. He was lost the moment Kyle sucked eagerly on his tongue, uncaring of whatever morning breath they had.

Unlike last night, there was a kind of tenderness to Kyle's touch. It was soft and forgiving and completely indulgent. Eric was left breathless and dizzied when Kyle shifted between his legs and cocked his hips forward. It was a slow, rhythmic grind that asked for no rush. Eric could literally count the exact second where Kyle twitched to life against him as they rocked lazily together.

Kyle stopped and looked down at Eric's flushed cheeks and the shy part of his lips with a relieved expression. "I was afraid I'd never see that again."

"S-see what?" Eric whispered, his voice cracking.

"This." Kyle's fingers slid down Eric's cheek and pressed down against his full lips. "You. The innocence. It's beautiful, you know that?"

Eric swallowed hard. "But… you said I needed to get rid of that."

"No I didn't. You implied like you always do," Kyle hissed. "I said you needed to straighten up and realize this world isn't kind to people like you."

"You're kind to me," Eric countered softly. Those green eyes widened when he reached up and brushed the soft curls from the nape of Kyle's neck. "That's why I still believe. You're my… unh… hah…!"

Kyle had suddenly bent forward and licked his nipple. Eric threw his head back and let out a sharp cry when Kyle bit down and teased the other with a pinch of his fingers.

"Is that thing inside you loyal to me?"

Eric blinked through the haze of pleasure in confusion. "W-what…?" His query was lost along with his breath when Kyle grabbed his throat with both hands and squeezed. Eric squirmed violently beneath his lover, his dick wilting from the sudden violence. "K-Kyle…" he gasped.

His grip tightened until Eric nearly rolled his eyes back from the lack of oxygen, his nails scraping down his wrists for release. Just as Kyle slowly eased up from crushing his windpipe, Eric's hand suddenly shot up and dug his nails hard into Kyle's wrist, his blue eyes sharp and wild.

Kyle peered inquisitively at the sudden change in his lover's personality. Cartman gnashed his teeth at him.

"F-fuck…!" he hissed. "Lay off you fucking Jew!"

"So I wasn't wrong," Kyle said, his fingers relaxing as Eric's alternative personality resurfaced. "You were the one who killed Heidi."

Cartman's chest heaved up and down for air, but he recovered by smiling indulgently at him and licking his lips. "Uh… newsflash, Kahl. I didn't kill anyone. I seem to remember you slitting their throats for me before tossing them in the lake." Those dark blue eyes sized Kyle up and purred. "God, you're amazing. And you did it so naturally. You're the man of my dreams."

Kyle's eyebrow quirked up. "Is that so?"

"Yeah…" he said dreamily. "I've been into you since forever, babe."

Kyle cut to the chase. "I woke this part of you up because you want me to trust you again. Do you think I should now that you let out that Pandora's Box in your head?"

"You'd be an idiot trusting anyone," Cartman answered thickly. There was nothing better than polite conversation and an eyeful of Jewish meat. "But I'm the exception. You're mine, Kahl."

"You've got that shit backwards," Kyle hissed. "You belong to me."

Cartman relaxed into the sheets with a pleased hum. "Then we've come to an agreement, don't you think?" When Kyle sighed and sat up, Cartman raised himself up on his elbows and stroked his firm, slender chest. "Still don't trust me?"

"I trust Eric," Kyle corrected. "It's you that's ambiguous."

"You'll never have to worry about me," he whispered with a lewd swipe of his tongue. "We're of one mind. Just a teeny-tiny bit fractured. I still want to be a good boy for you."

"I'm going to tell you what I told Eric," Kyle began, ignoring the way Cartman started to suckle at his throat. "I don't want you doing that shit again. If there's a problem, you come to me. Do you hear me?"

"Crystal," Cartman purred against his throat. "You going to baby me, Kahl? That's kind of hot. I've got my own sexy Jew boy at my beck and call. Mm… yeah. I do like that…" His hands slipped lower until he had that kosher cock right in the palm of his hands. He stroked once to gauge the way Kyle's eyes darkened, but there was little reaction aside from that.

It sounded like a challenge. "I love you, Kahl~" he said in his sweetest tone. As expected, Kyle's sharp features softened. He could use this to his advantage.

Before he could, Kyle's eyes narrowed and he slammed their lips together in a harsh kiss. Cartman moaned wantonly when Kyle shoved him hard back onto the bed.

"I wonder…" Kyle tilted his head in a way that made Cartman actually tremble, "if it's possible to put you two back together."

Cartman smirked nervously. "What?"

"They say trauma causes personalities to split," Kyle explained with a whisper. "If I fuck you so hard, do you think that'll be enough?"

"Uh, if you actually think so, Dr. Broflovski. I personally don't think you can literally fuck someone mentally back together," Cartman teased. "E for effort, though."

"I don't think you understand how logic works around here," Kyle explained, pushing Cartman's chest down so hard, he started to instinctively squirm. "Everything can be solved with a good, thorough fucking. I'll snap you back together if it's the last thing I do."

"Okay, seriously, you are NOT going to fuse me with that pussylicker," Cartman hissed. He thrashed around when Kyle pinned his wrists firmly to the bed and bit him so hard in the throat, he cried out in pain. "Ow! Knock it off, asshole!"

"Yes. Yes I am," Kyle promised with a growl. He ground their hips down so hard, Cartman's eyes widened and he let out a gasp too late, giving Kyle the prime moment to stick his tongue down his throat. Kyle's teeth sunk into Cartman's lips instead when the bigger boy gnashed his teeth closed too fast for his tongue. "Open, Cartman," he warned, his nails digging deep into the bigger boy's wrists. Cartman cried out in pain again. "And if you bite my tongue, I'll tear off your beytsim."

Cartman snarled in response, so Kyle bit down so hard on his bottom lip it started to bleed. He let out a howl from the pain. Kyle quickly sealed his mouth over Cartman's, feasting on the blood and saliva against his tongue. Cartman bitched and moaned beneath him, his hips squirming under his in a fit for dominance.

"So uncooperative…" Kyle commented the moment he tore his mouth away. Blood and saliva dripped down his chin and Cartman couldn't help but groan at the sight. "That's the problem with people who had their first taste of violence. So you've beat someone within an inch of their life - big whoop. You've got the raw shit, but you've got a lot to learn dealing with a veteran." His gaze steeled. "And I know how to get you on your hands and knees."

To his credit, Cartman struggled every inch of the way. Unfortunately for him, Kyle's threat wasn't as empty as he thought. He exploited every inch of his heavy lover, his fingers pressing into the seam of his groin and thigh, knowing exactly where he could render Cartman docile as he tore off his boxers.

Before Cartman could even rub two brain cells together, Kyle had flipped him onto his stomach and forced a dry digit inside of him. "G-guh… you motherfucker…!" Cartman panted, his mouth sinking into the pillow as he groaned.

"Hmm… I suppose Liane would be my type," Kyle responded with a crook of his finger. Cartman nearly bumped his head right into the headboard when he jumped. "Sweet and psychotic. Just like you. But don't worry. You're more than a handful for me."

Cartman was still open and slick from yesterday's activities. Kyle wasted no time adding a second finger to test how far he could go without lube. Cartman thrashed and squeezed around his fingers, unaware that he was only heightening Kyle's arousal by fighting. "Oh god…" Kyle decided with a breathless grin. "Look at you squirm. Are you that against my dick inside of you?"

A deep groan was his answer.

Kyle slid a third digit in and suddenly shoved them all the way to the knuckle, feeling Cartman's thighs tremble in a mixture of pain and pleasure. As he worked those muscles, he pressed his chest against Cartman's bare back and put an end to the squirming once and for all. "That's enough of that," Kyle purred and crooked his fingers hard against his prostate.

Cartman jerked forward into the pillows and whined. Not just any whine - it sounded exactly like Eric's. Kyle smirked in triumph. "There you are, shayn."

"F-f-fuck you…" Cartman whimpered when Kyle peppered kisses along his shoulders.

"I don't allow swearing in my bed," Kyle said sharply. He turned his fingers again and pushed into that perfect spot, leaving Cartman to expel a mess of delicious sounds that had Kyle hard and leaking against the back of his thigh. "Do I, Eric?"

Eric responded with a sob. "N-no…"

Kyle's fingers stilled, intentionally waiting until Eric couldn't help but push back for more. He never thought he'd see the day where he needed to break Eric down, but maybe this was something that was a long overdue.

It was always the sweet ones you had to watch out for.

Eric was still squirming, his thoughts banked by heat and his darker personality floating just barely in the surface. Kyle wanted this. He wanted to see if he could snap two pieces of a puzzle together that could never naturally fit - even if it meant cutting the corners to make it happen. Eric needed the darkness somehow to survive and the only way to be sure was to let all of Eric know that Kyle was perfection - someone to covet and never stray from. He would fuck the loyalty out of him if it was the last thing he ever did.

"The more you fight, the more humiliating it'll be," Kyle said, and his smug tone made Eric snap his head over his shoulder and grit his teeth. "Wrong answer."

Kyle pulled his fingers entirely out of him and Eric tried to force down a whimper over the lost. His newfound confidence waned while his cock throbbed into the mattress. It was infuriating how much he wanted to just give in and yet feel completely empowered.

He was not given much time to compose his thoughts because Kyle had finished lubing himself up before he mercilessly shoved into him. Eric let out a howl and braced himself hard against the sheets when Kyle seated himself all the way to the hilt.

It was like something snapped in his head. Eric furiously tried to buck him off, but Kyle perfected the art of entrapment. He could do no more than thrash and endure the humiliation and pleasure of being filled up with someone's cock inside of him.

The bed rocked a bit when Kyle experimentally shifted, his low grunt reminding Eric all too much like an animal than a human. The longer they remained locked, the more reality sank in, and he had to come to grips with the breaking. Like his ass, Eric was growing accustomed to the invasion, and he parted his legs a bit more to slide Kyle deeper in.

"That's it…" Kyle hissed into his ear. "Take it all in… fucking take it!"

Eric panted at the command. The pain wasn't as bad as yesterday, but Kyle had never been this vicious until now. He wondered how much he had been holding back at Eric's expense.

Once he finally settled down, Kyle started to move. It was slow, but precise - and every thrust was designed to penetrate so deep, Eric couldn't help but whimper in time to the bed frame smacking against the wall. That, along with the maddening scrape of that hot chest against his back, was literally fucking his entire senses up. And when Kyle shifted his hips higher so he could reach around and squeeze his neglected dick, the sounds Eric made were completely inhuman and incoherent.

Just when he was near the edge of climax, Kyle pulled out and the loss left Eric gasping for more. Kyle flipped him onto his back and Eric got an eyeful of his sweat slicked chest and the trimmed cock in his palm.

"Look at you…" Kyle smiled at him, his green eyes alight and heady. "You act like you've never been fucked before."

The words came out before he could even think it through. "F-fuck yo-omfph!" Kyle's hand came down hard across his lips, silencing him completely.

"If you can't follow the house rules, you have to be punished," Kyle uttered thickly. "I think we should cut out your tongue."

Eric's eyes widened and he desperately tried shaking his head. He'd do it too. Literally. Swallowing down his pride, Eric fluttered his eyes closed and moaned into Kyle's hand, his tongue flickering against his palm. With a wry grin, Kyle slipped a finger into his mouth. Then another. Eric worked the digits around his tongue and into his throat, trying not to gag.

"Hmm… you make a fair argument," Kyle teased. His other hand slid down and pried Eric's trembling thighs open. Helpless and pliant beneath him, Kyle pushed himself back in with a generous sigh.

The bed slowly started to rock again and each time Kyle would thrust, so would the fingers in Eric's throat. He tried desperately to swallow around them, but he lost his last bit of control the moment Kyle angled his thrusts and hit him head on in the prostate. A keening moan seeped against Kyle's fingers and saliva started to drip down Eric's chin the faster Kyle pushed into him.

It was too much. His neglected cock strained and bounced against his belly. He almost lost it when Kyle accidentally moaned aloud and nearly gagged when Kyle squeezed him around the base of his cock to stop him from climaxing.

Frustrated, Eric wrenched his mouth away from Kyle's fingers. "K-kahl…" he said hoarsely. "I can't…!"

"You don't come until I do." Kyle was panting hard now, his stoic act unraveling at the seams. He pulled Eric's knees against his chest and dipped down, catching his lips in a rough, desperate kiss. Eric moaned and eagerly pushed upwards to meet him halfway, his arms wrapping around Kyle's neck as they rocked so hard the headboard bounced loudly against the wall again. Poor Ike.

"Ngh… ahh…!" Eric sobbed out. It was like a goddamn exorcism. Pillows were being shifted off, the sheets were sliding all over the place under them. Even the ceiling seemed to be shuddering overhead. "Oh god… n-more…!"

"More?" One particular thrust was so tight, Eric saw stars.

His fingers clawed down Kyle's back, leaving red marks down pale freckled skin. He couldn't handle anymore. "N-no… no more! I can't…!"

"Denied." Every syllable was punctuated by a thrust. Kyle squeezed his purpling cock even more, refusing his release.

Eric desperately fisted through his crimson curls in plea. He threw his head back in agonizing pleasure when kisses was no longer an adequate offering to get Kyle to finish. The pace was unrelenting. He couldn't catch his breath. Everything south of his abdomen was tightly coiled and throbbing for release. "Please… oh god, please…!"

He wasn't fucking kidding. He really was trying to fuck him into a brain aneurysm.

Whatever was left coherent in his mind unraveled. His newly found resolve shattered and his legs untangled in a boneless heap, inviting more of him for Kyle to thrust into. Eric literally short-circuited from an overload of pleasure and exhaustion. All that was left was to hang on and let Kyle do away with him entirely.

"That's it…" Kyle said with a breathless sound of pride. "Break for me… more… that's it…" And when those blue eyes flashed at him once last time, the last flare of resistance from the darkness within Eric, Kyle simply grinned and kissed those pliant lips.

He loosened his grip on Eric's cock and stroked him once, twice - Eric was gone by the first stroke. Eric jackknifed so hard off the bed, he almost bucked Kyle off completely as he climaxed. The world, if not for a split second, was fissured back into its proper place.

Kyle finished inside him not too long afterwards, his thrusts erratic and rushed while Eric still twitched beneath him. With a bloodcurdling howl that quickened his pulse, Eric's eyes widened in alarm when he felt something hot and thick fill him up, Kyle's hips still canting as he rode out his orgasm. Kyle didn't put on a condom, but the last thing on Eric's mind right now was to preach about safe sex to someone who clearly didn't give a shit.

Instead, he opened his arms to Kyle as he collapsed on top of him. The next couple of minutes was nothing except for the sound of heavy breathing and the delightful whimper Eric made when Kyle finally eased out of him with a snort of content.

When Eric finally found his voice, it was cracked and sore from the abuse of his throat. "You weren't kidding."

"Are you seriously talking right now?" Kyle grumbled before he rolled off of him and searched for his cigarettes. "You know, I'm not fond of this entire week of celibacy. If you were gonna prove a fucking point to me, don't hold sex hostage. It didn't do anything to you."

Eric watched through half-lidded eyes as Kyle picked up what looked like his hoodie from last night and wiped himself down. Kyle paused, took a second look at the jacket, and then tossed it at his head. "Merry Christmas, asshole," he hissed around the cigarette.

So it really had been meant for him. Eric sighed and unfolded the soft fabric now stained with the blood of his victims and Kyle's cum. Lovely. "Did you find my…?"

Kyle raised his right hand, revealing a very handsome titanium watch that made Eric's heart skip a beat. "I can't believe you didn't notice it."

"Oh, I'm sorry, Kahl. Did you want me to remember every freckle on your body too while I'm at it? I was too busy deepthroating your entire fist!" The sarcasm dripped through as naturally as breathing. To his surprise, Kyle simply lit up and joined him back in bed.

"This is gonna be real fucking hard to get used to with that new mouth of yours," Kyle drawled. Eric pinched his lips and reluctantly wiped himself down with the jacket before he apologetically curled against Kyle's side. There was nothing he could do - it was ruined anyways.

He didn't want to admit it aloud but it felt… good to vent like that. It was like something he should have done years ago.

He ended up having to call his mother and explain to her that yes he was alive, and no he wasn't permanently brain damaged by what had transpired last night. Of all the people he wished they didn't see the livestream, his mother was one of them.

And it didn't help that his Facebook exploded with friend requests and tagged statuses just begging and bitching about what happened after Kyle cut off the feed. The truth was no one except him and Kyle knew the status of Heidi and Ron and it was becoming the talk of the snowed in town. Nature itself demanded they stay their murderous butts indoors today.

But a small blessing did present itself. With everything caught in a blizzard, the last candle on the Broflovski's family menorah was shared privately instead of another party. Eric watched respectfully from his perch on the couch while they lit up the final candle and made preparations for dinner.

Kyle's parents were surprisingly warm to his extra company. Sheila made no fuss about adding an extra set on the table while Gerald made an offhanded remark about kickstarters that made Eric flush in embarrassment. Ike couldn't stop looking at him either - like he was witnessing some kind of alien for the first time - and it was annoying enough that Kyle had to order his Canadian ass out of the living room.

"Look at you, Mr. Popular," Kyle drawled before flopping right next to him. He fished a cigarette from his pocket. "Even Stan won't shut up about you."

Sheila popped her head out of the kitchen the moment Kyle flipped open his lighter. "No smoking in living room, bubbe!"

"Fuck." He tucked the cigarette behind his ear instead. "Where the hell am I supposed to smoke? There's like six feet of snow out on the porch!"

Eric tentatively sighed and lowered his phone. "They know." About us.

"Yeah, so?"

"Are you okay with that?" Eric asked softly. "It's not one random person that saw us. Everyone saw you reach for me in the livestream."

Kyle rolled his eyes and leaned against the cushion. "Dude, I told you I had no problem with you. You're the one who assumed I did."

Eric clutched his phone tightly in his palm. "Then why aren't we in a relationship on Facebook?"

"Oh goddammit. This shit again. Look, you never sent me the notification," Kyle said so simply, it made Eric's jaw drop. Seriously?

Kyle's cigarette nearly fell off when Eric grabbed him by the front of his shirt and pulled him in hard. "You're being unnecessarily rough today," Kyle purred with a quirk of his eyebrow.

"I was waiting for you to send me the notification!" Eric whined, his fingers twisting into his silky tie. "I thought you didn't want anyone to know about us!"

"Okay, seriously? When did I ever force anything on you, Cartman?" Kyle lifted up a finger and counted out. "Our first kiss? I made sure you agreed to it first. First blow job? I gave you an option out of it. First time we fucked? I waited until you said it was okay. I was fucking patient with your tubby ass because I knew you were into the whole romantic shit."

Eric's eyes widened. Now that Kyle was mentioning it, he started to remember things in a new light. Kyle could have taken advantage of him. It was so easy, he should have, but he didn't. "Why?" he croaked. "You could've done anything to me if you-"

"-you're the only pure thing I've got," Kyle muttered so quietly, Eric was almost sure he imagined it. "For once in my life, I just want to have something… something good. Bad is easy. It's seriously easy. But when I see you do good, it's amazing. I just fucking hate the fact that you can get so fucking oblivious, people can take advantage of it."

It was baffling. Eric could only sit there slack jawed while Kyle fiddled angrily with his cigarette and poured his heart out in a way he'd never seen before. With a slow, easy smile, Eric leaned forward and brushed his lips against Kyle's. "But I'm not pure anymore," he answered sadly. "My charity drive is ruined."

"Not exactly," Kyle said with a thoughtful look. "Check your kickstarter."

Aside from the ten grand rescinded by the Tweaks for failing to deliver on the televised killings, fifteen thousand remained in the donation pool, but as far as Eric was concerned, it wasn't meant for the vets. "I can't accept it," Eric sighed. "Like you said, it's blood money."

"No, it's an informant reward," Kyle corrected. "The Tweaks can get fucked, but the others didn't pull out. Craig's thrown it all over Twitter. You saved our asses telling us about Middle Park. It's only fair this fucking town gave you the respect you deserved."

Eric's eyes couldn't get any wider. "You mean… people like me now?"

"They think you've gone batshit crazy. And they think you've got me on some kind of fucking leash now because you grew some balls. It's degrading," Kyle spat out ruefully, "but I'm not correcting the rumors. Consider it a Hanukkah present. You're welcome."

His charity drive was still gold. A thrum of peace and content washed over Eric. "Thanks, Kahl." He kissed him again. "This is all I've ever dreamed about! My goals were met, I'm with you for Hanukkah…"

"We're not done yet," Kyle countered. "Check your notifications."

Eric's heart literally leaped into his throat when he scrolled down. Facebook was asking to accept his new relationship status with Kyle Broflovski. "Oh, I dunno… what if I accidentally hit 'no'?"

Kyle looked scandalized. "Then you're shit out of luck! I'm only sending it out once."

That sounded like a promise. His fingers shaking, Eric made sure he pressed the 'yes' button and, just like that, a status automatically popped up on his timeline with the little heart and everything.

Kyle Broflovski and Eric Cartman are in a relationship.

Likes and comments started pouring in - most if not all of them positive for their newest diabolical couple. Red, ever the self-proclaimed portmanteau namer for every teenage couple in South Park, began trending the new hashtag all over the feed.

"Kyman, huh?" Kyle noted offhandedly. "Sounds like a food spice."

"I love it," Eric whispered proudly. "It's perfect. We're perfect."

He had stared at the screen for so long, his phone flickered out to conserve the battery. From the blackened screen, he could see Kyle's reflection visibly smirk at him before he brushed his lips against Eric's ear. "We are perfect."

Perhaps, through the looking glass, those same words were uttered. It may not be in the same context, nor the same circumstances that led them to those three single words, but they would always be a constant throughout each universe. Enemies, friends, lovers - Kyle Broflovski and Eric Cartman would always be dangerously intertwined with each other.

They were absolutely perfect.