Shizuo stepped into the shower, letting his mind wander around as he stood under the pouring showerhead. After some mindless wandering, his thoughts finally landed on a troubling one. Something a certain girl who was always with Kadota had said.

"It's because Shizu-chan's in love with Iza-Iza and vice versa!"

Shizuo snorted. Him? Love Izaya? More like hate him so much he wants to impale the smirking face to a pole.

If the former bartender was going to love somebody, it certainly wasn't going to be some annoying flea with a tendency to light his fuse up in seconds.

No. Shizuo… Shizuo was going to… the blond frowned and ran his fingers through his damp hair when he realized that he didn't have a type. There just had been way too much chaos going on in his life and desperately trying to keep his temper in check. It was worse after he met Izaya in high school and spent most of his time chasing him around. He didn't have much time to meet girls, much less pick out a type.

The blond supposed he wanted someone who was nice, simple and didn't mind loving him despite everything. A yamato nadeshiko, he supposed. No one annoying and twisted like the flea.

Shizuo paused in his washing when he realized one important flaw in the girl's logic. He wasn't even gay!

Shizuo grinned at the peace of mind, returning to scrub his body with soap. His renewed actions stopped again when his brain brought back a little memory that sent his imaginary argument crashing down.

"Kasuka, I'm not GAY."

"Brother, you never had a girlfriend in your life and you're 24… that makes you gay."

Shizuo clutched the pipe. Does that make him gay? Kasuka definitely knew more about society and whatever society classified people as. Was he gay? Did never having a girlfriend matter that much?

Shizuo increased his grip on the pipe. He sighed through his nose, closing his eyes and leaning his forehead against the cool tiles. The coolness briefly distracted him from the troubling thoughts.

He was startled when he realized that he crushed the pipes, a handprint embedding itself into it. Glancing at the small clock at the other corner of the bathroom, he frowned when he realized that he was taking over the 5 or 6 minute shower rule he employed himself to save water bill. Hastily, he closed the shower before wrapping a towel around his waist.

His thought soon returned back to Izaya and their relationship. Reaching for a clean T-shirt and pants amongst the bartender suits, he scowled. Izaya had gotten him kicked out of that job, hadn't he? Even after Kasuka had thoughtfully bought him spares of the suit.

Izaya was just always ruining his life, wasn't he? Just one thing after another. There had been the whole incident back in high school. Even before that, Shizuo earned countless of detentions because of Izaya.

That disappointed his family, Shizuo knew. They put up with all his crap and what did he give them? Broken refrigerators, detentions, almost going to jail and getting fired from his jobs one after another. A failure in all.

As he dragged the shirt down, the fortissimo of Ikebukuro realized that he'd known Izaya for what? 8 years? Aside from his family and Shinra (who didn't really count much as a friend… Shizuo knew that he wanted to experiment on him and kept close. And the blond only really stuck to Shinra because he was pretty much the only one who could explain the supernatural strength and wasn't so scared of it), did he even know anyone for over 8 years?

Shinra introduced him to Celty later on, after starting high school. Shizuo still can't figure out whether Shinra trusted him enough to let him in on the secret or if there had been something wrong with Celty before she became the 'Black Rider'. There hadn't been much rumors about her when he was in middle school..

Tom… He'd known Tom briefly since middle school but then he only really known him when he entered high school. And then there were the years where they briefly lost contact before Tom gave him the job. Did those years count? If they didn't, it was about… what? 4 or 5, maybe?

Kadota… He'd been in the same year of high school but the man kept his distance, until about the last year. So...4 years?

The monster of Ikebukuro bit his lip as he went through the list of people he knew and scowled when he realized that he known Izaya, someone he hated, more than most of his friends. What does that say about him?

Shizuo ran his fingers through his drying hair and stood up from the bed, intending to go to the kitchen. He desperately tried to find someone he'd liked and known for 8 years. Who else does he know? Who was he missing?

Simon! But did Simon really count as a friend? He was more of a parent, with him scolding Shizuo and Izaya all the time for fighting and forcing them to 'make up' over discounted sushi.

How many years had he known Simon? The blond seen the monstrous man since he was little (kinda hard not to see) but he only really came into personal contact after… Izaya came to high school and pissed him off and they went around school and town, destroying public property.

Shizuo sighed, pawing through the cabinets for food. There was a bag of molding bread in the corner. Knowing Simon for 8 years, mostly because of Izaya didn't really count as a win.

The strongest man of Ikebukuro decided that these were troubling thoughts. Thoughts that he didn't need and were too much trouble to think about. Who cared if he'd known Izaya for 8 years, longer than most people in his life?

He picked up a recently bought curry flavored instant noodle packet. Maybe later he'll go down and grab a cherry pie from the bakery. He'd been craving that for about a week now.

"It's never going to work. He'll kill you before then."

"And that's why I have so many ways of convincing him. Besides, nothing's impossible."

"Well, whatever ways you have, he'll never agree to it. He'll snap you like a twig before you can even speak."

"You forget that you're talking to someone who's been chased by Shizu-chan countless times and survived."

"Tch. You definitely won't after you make this attempt. Good riddance."

"Oh I will. I have a better chance of succeeding than you with your ignorant brother."

"Shut up. Seji noticing me and acknowledging me is enough."

"And that's where you and I are different. I'm not satisfied with only acknowledgement. I need more and I'll get it."

"We'll see. Don't come back crying to me when you're beaten to a millimeter of death."

"Oh, wouldn't dream of it. No one wants to see a cold-hearted bitch's face when they're dying."

Yamato nadeshiko - I think it means something like a traditional Japanese woman. Kind, caring, nice, loves children, shy, delicate. A very feminine woman.

And most of it is Shizuo's thoughts but the last part was a last minute thing because if I made that into another chapter, it probably would've been too short. And because I'm too tired (I went out all day. I hate going out.), it's all just dialogue.

The pie thing may sound weird but I'm celebrating Pi Day, March 14th.

Thanks for reading! Hope this wasn't boring for you.