Hello, lovelies! Sorry it's been so long, but I'm here now and that's what matters! I hope you enjoy this, and remember to leave me love if you do!

"No." I answered him. He wasn't going to pull this puppy-dog shit with me, not today. He looked honest-to-God affronted that I was able to turn him down.

"Please? I'm…afraid." Cue the wide eyes to the max.

"Let's try this again. Hell to the no." I meant what I said. I was not, under any circumstances, going to be sucked into this again. Sad vampire face be damned. He watched me for a solid minute, waiting for me to change my mind. Then he reached his hand into his pocket, pulled out a slip of paper and sat it on the table.

"That's my number. Call me if you think of anything you want me to ask." He rose from the table and walked out the door. I saw him get into a car, so my guess was he was driving. Hell, he probably needed the drive to get his thoughts together. I sat down at the table he had just vacated and chewed on my bottom lip. I picked up the slip of paper and twirled it between my fingers. Okay-seriously? Did he really expect me to just get into a car with him and go driving off into the sunset, looking for our long lost family?

I got up and started to head back to the bar to finish my shift when my boss called me over. "You alright, love? You look a little pale." Did I?

"Yeah…sorry. I'm just a little under the weather, that's all." I shook my head, trying to bring myself back into the real world. The only world that mattered.

"It's slowing up in here-why don't you take off. You've been working too hard as it is." Because that's just what I needed-more time.

"Thanks. I'll head on home." I tossed my apron behind the bar and headed out the door. On the way, my thoughts trailed back to Jasper. It has to suck, being in his situation. They all but kicked him out, and now he was just going to go and beg for answers?

Damn it, and there's the guilt. I stopped in the middle of the sidewalk. I was probably halfway between work and my apartment when I pulled out my cell phone. I sighed, looking at the screen light up. Was I going to do this? Why was I going to do this? I don't know him! Then Emmett's face flashed in front of me, and Esme, and Carlisle, and everyone in a procession. And I knew that I was going to call him because I wanted answers. I grabbed the crumpled piece of paper from my pocket and dialed the number.

"Yes?"

"Uh…it's Bella." Silence. "How far away are you?"

"Why?"

"I changed my mind." He snorted. Did vampires snort?

"I'll pick you up in an hour." Click. Well, at least he was coming back. I made it back to my apartment and started to pack. Shit-what was I going to need? Where the hell were they? And was I going to have to fly? I grabbed my passport just in case. Tossing in a handful of sweaters and jeans, I added some PJs and called it quits. I parked myself on the couch and called my boss.

"Hey, it's Bella. Listen-something's come up back home. I'm going to have to take off for a while. Yeah, I'm not sure how long, but I'll call as soon as I have a better idea. I'm really sorry-I have no choice." She understood, and didn't put up a fight. I heard a car pull up out front, and then a horn honked. I huffed-what, no door pick-up? Deciding it didn't matter anyway, I locked my door and headed out to meet him.

"So sorry about that," I murmured once I got into the car.

"Why'd you change your mind?" he asked, ignoring my apology.

"I decided I wanted answers too." Well, at least I didn't wait until tomorrow to call, then he'd have been long gone.

"Alright then." Short and sweet. He pulled away and headed away from town.

"So…where exactly are they?" I asked, curious. I mean, how would you go about sneaking up on a Coven full of vampires that had a fortune teller living with them?

"I have no idea. That's why I said I wasn't sure how long this will take-I'm going to have to track them."

"And how are you going to do that?" It seemed like a difficult feat, chasing vampires that didn't want to be found.

"First, we're going to Northern Ireland. Carlisle has friends there, and if he's been to see them they'll tell me."

"And if they don't know?"

"Then there are other people I can call; I would just rather talk with the Irish Coven first. They're more…hospitable." That triggered a thought.

"Jasper? This coven we're going to visit-my guess is they're not vegetarians." Which was bad for me, since apparently I was pretty tasty to these guys.

"You would be correct. But they're very civilized, they won't hurt you. They're actually very kind." Well, that was a comfort-until I fell and cut myself again. Then we'll see who's hospitable. I didn't say anything else, only gazing out the passenger window watching the scenery fly by. We were silent for hours.

"Where are we going? I mean, I know we're going to Ireland, but…couldn't we just take a plane from London?"

"We could have, yes. But I prefer it this way-fewer people." I looked at him dumbly. "I haven't been away from human blood as long as the others who follow my diet. It's just…easier if I'm not on a plane stuffed with people. We'll take a small charter plane." My hand crept to the window button; I wasn't about to have him chomping on my ass! The window rolled down, and he chuckled. "You're not in any danger, Bella. I'm not going to eat you." I kept the window down anyway. We got to the airport not long after that, and it shouldn't have surprised me-we were taking a private plane. When he said 'charter', I should have figured as much. I grabbed my bags and walked on board with a frown on my face. We settled in, and the flight attendant (seriously? He paid for this?) brought me a drink.

"So Bella. Would you tell me about your time with the Cullens? With Edward?" he asked as I sipped my soda-water. I choked.

"Why? I've already told you everything that makes a difference."

"I know that. But that doesn't mean I'm not curious. They were my family, after all."

"You already know how I met them; what are you looking for?" I balked, trying in vain to avoid the topic.

"What's your favorite memory with them?" Oh, Jesus H Christ. Was he intentionally trying to rip my heart to shreds? Because this would work for sure.

"Our first summer together, we went swimming in the river near the house. It was private, and not very deep. Everybody went; even Rosalie, which was an event because that would involve getting her hair wet and that NEVER happened. So I was sitting on the bank with Esme, because swimming with vampires? Not a good idea. Carlisle was watching from the bank as well, but everyone else was in the water. Emmett, being himself, made some smart-ass comment to Edward about something that I can't even remember. And then Alice looks up, all in the middle of a vision, and giggles. Edward sees what she's seeing, and laughs, and you know it's on then! So Edward dives underwater, nabs Emmett by the legs and yanks his trunks off. He tosses them on the bank, ugh, right in my lap, before Emmett can even figure out what's going on. And he's pissed, and comes rushing towards me, butt-ass-naked!" I actually giggled here, despite the pain. "And I jump up and freak out because hello, he's naked! So I toss the shorts at him and run behind Esme, who pats me on the head and apologizes for her children's behavior. Everybody was laughing, and I was blushing, and it was like we were a family." I could see the whole thing again, and it actually physically hurt.

"I can see that," Jasper mumbled. His face was scrunched up-whether due to my pain or his I wasn't sure. And I realized in that moment that this was exactly why we were looking for them. I know that moment wasn't fake-so what changed? I needed to know why I wasn't good enough. "Are you going to ask me the same thing?" he asked.

I thought for a moment. "No, I don't think I can stand it. Not right now. You know, before you came along I had completely shoved ALL of them into the back of my mind? I didn't want to think about anything involving them. It hurt too much. I still don't want to think about it." This sudden burst of honesty surprised me.

"Why are you feeling worthless? I understand your sadness, but it wasn't your fault they left you, Bella." I looked at him, shocked.

"How do you figure? If I would have been more careful, then I wouldn't have cut my finger. That's why they left." I was hit with a wave of anger that definitely wasn't mine.

"That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard. Bella, you're a human. You bleed. Every single one of them knew that when they chose to befriend you. And Edward knew that when he chose to love you. You acted as any human would, and you can't blame yourself for that." I just stared at him.

"But if he loved me, and they loved me, why didn't they want to turn me?" This secret desire burned on the way out, but it was the truth. That was the root of it all.

"Edward has always been afraid to allow himself any form of gratification. I imagine that turning you, assuring your place by his side for eternity, would be the ultimate release for him. It probably scared him to death." I rolled my eyes. "In addition to that, he believes that we as a species are damned no matter the lifestyle we choose to follow. Therefore, turning you would be damning you."

It was Edward, in a nutshell. It shook me, knowing that this man knew them as well, better, than I did.

"How do you do it? Not blame yourself?" I asked, because I sure as hell could use some tips.

"My situation was different. If I blame myself for anything, it's for being too trusting. I left without question, when I should have been full of them. But whatever she saw to push me away? That wasn't my fault. And it's not yours either." He said to me again, pushing his calming influence down my throat.

"I need to hear it from them." I stated.

"And so you will. We'll be landing soon, and then we'll have to drive for a bit. They don't exactly live in the towns' center," he said as he changed the subject. I nodded, acknowledging the drop in subject.

"So these vampires we're going to meet-what are they like?" I asked. It was probably best to learn as much as I could so that I was prepared. "I know they don't conform to your diet, but do they have abilities? Are they nice? How do they know Carlisle?"

"They're very kind, Bella. Carlisle met them while he was roaming Europe-before he met the Volturi. And one of the members, Maggie, is gifted. She can tell if someone is lying-almost like a second sense. She's very sweet. Don't worry-I promise they won't hurt you. In fact, I hazard a guess that they will be on your side." He chuckled.

"This is insane. I can't believe I'm doing this." I shook my head. "I'm just asking for it, aren't I? I get out of this make believe world, and now I'm waltzing back in?! I must be crazy." At this, Jasper actually laughed. I mean, full on laughed. His head was thrown back and his dimples were peeking at me from the wide grin that graced his face.

"You're rather entertaining, you know that?" he said through his chuckle.

"Glad to know I can bring on the chuckles," I muttered. The fasten seatbelt light came on, and the plane began to descend.

Eh? Did I have you going there at the beginning? Next up we'll be meeting the Irish coven.