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A day without laughter is a day wasted. -Charlie Chaplin

Aly's POV

Austin is probably the creepiest creep in the history of creepdom.

And I know a lot of creeps, so that's really saying something.

Cory opened the front door and as the three of us walked out of the house, I asked, "Why the wonk would she want to be out here? It's all dark and gross and depressing."

Actually, by that description, I'm surprised Jade didn't run out here.

Before Cory could even answer, Gwen cried, "Maybe she's hiding from the kidnappers in the bushes!" If she had been able to see Cory and I, she would have shrunken back in embarrassment from the looks we gave her. But she didn't see them.

She was too busy jumping in one of the bushes by our driveway, calling for Mandy and doing some kind of bird call or something.

What.

Cory looked at me, then asked, "Where's Beck's RV?"

"Uh, Mom made him move it so there'd be room for everybody's cars." I pointed to the spot where he parked it, on the strip of grass between the driveway and our neighbor's fence. "But why-"

Wait.

Oh.

DUH.

Amanda's infatuated with Beck. Of course. She probably went into his recreational vehicle so she could wear his clothes and smell his pillow.

But I hope she's not doing that last thing, because that's creepy. Especially for a five year old.

"She's in the RV! Just as I suspected!" Gwen screeched, stumbling out of the bush and over to us.

I wish that had been a rosebush she had been flopping around in.

After Gwen pulled a twig out of her hair, the three of us walked over to the Silver Streak, but the door was locked and I don't have a key.

I have a foot, though.

Thank you, Jade.

As soon as I kicked in the door, Cory, Gwen and I stuffed ourselves through the door of that tin can. To our relief, my boyfriend knew his little sister pretty well.

Amanda was sitting on Beck's bed, wearing at least three of his flannels and his biggest pair of boots, with Duke curled up by her side.

Oh. So that's where he went.

Wait, why do I care where the damn dog was? I don't even like it.

Moving on.

Cory let out a groan, though I think it was mostly a sigh of relief. "Mandy, there you are." He flopped down next to her and wrapped an arm around her in a half hug. "You shouldn't run off like that, especially when the rest of us are blind as bats."

"Sorry," Mandy quietly said, patting Duke on his head, which was rested on her lap. " Hortense was s'posed to tell you guys where I was."

"Well, Hortense is lousy at spreading the word, apparently." I sat down at the chair in front of Beck's desk and Gwen stood beside me. "All of us have been losing our minds trying to find you, y'know."

Mandy looked at all of us with guilty blue eyes. "I just wanted to play in my boyfriend's house."

Cory sighed. "Kiddo, Beck already has a girlfriend."

Mandy gave him a look, as if she didn't realize why he bothered pointing that out. "I know. I'm his other girlfriend."

I blinked in confusion, then asked, "And you're okay with that?"

Mandy nodded. "Yeah! I'm good at sharing."

You are going to make a damn dirty cheater very happy one day, Amanda Edison.

And with the most serious expression I've ever seen on a child, she added, "And then when Beck gets sick of that icky other girl and her icky face, he can date just me and we'll get married and have eleventy hundred kids and live in a bounce house."

... Well then.

This is a girl with a plan for her future.

And I'm actually kind of surprised she knows Beck's name. She calls him 'my boyfriend' so much, I assumed she thought that was his name.

"Okay, we need to get you inside before Mom has a stroke." Cory grabbed his sister's hand, but quickly retracted. As quickly as he could anyway, since he had to shake it off. "Why's your hand so sticky?"

Mandy looked down at her lap and shrugged. "I dunno..." She picked up the scissors that I hadn't even noticed had been in her lap and before she could set them down, Cory took them from her.

"And what are you doing with these?" Cory asked, setting the extremely sharp scissors on Beck's side table. "Dad says you're not allowed to touch anything sharper than a hard boiled egg."

Mandy looked like she was going to say something, probably 'I dunno' again, but before she could, I guess Gwen noticed something on the ground and picked it up. "A glue stick?" She and I exchanged a look. I guess that explains her sticky hand. But the real question? "Um, Mandy, what have you been doing in here?" Gwen asked, sitting on the free spot to Duke's right, where he happily crawled onto her lap. When he did, we were all finally able to see that he had been laying on something. "Hey, what are these?"

"N-Nothin'." Amanda tried to grab them, but Gwen was too quick for her. As soon as Gwen flipped through the something or others, she fell off the bed and ROFL'd.

I didn't think people did that in real life.

"What's so funny?" Cory asked, picking up the whatevers from the spot that Gwen dropped them. Cory flipped through them, and by the look on his face, I expected him to ROFL too. But because my boyfriend has a little more self control than my sister, and by that I mean he HAS self control, he choked it back and gave Mandy a look. "Seriously?"

I snatched them from him, which gave him the perfect opportunity to rest his head in his hands at whatever his little sister did.

What's the big deal? It was a picture of my brother in the Black Box Theater, with-

Well, it used to be Jade. And it still technically is her body.

But now she has Mandy's head pasted over hers.

I looked at another. This time, Beck was at the Asphalt Cafe, seated at our usual table, his arm wrapped around Jamanda

That's what I am hereby calling this fusion of Jade and Amanda.

I looked at another.

And another.

And another.

All of the Bade pictures my brother owned were now Bamanda pictures.

Or Amandeck.

Or maybe it should be Bandy.

Or Mandeck.

That last one sounds nice.

And that is the tale of how I joined Gwendolyn in ROFLing.

"Where did you even get these pictures of yourself?" I could hear Cory ask his sister over Gwen's cackling.

"In a big book with lots of pictures that Mommy has on her desk in her office."

"... Yeah, Mom's going to be really happy about that."

After a few minutes, Gwen and I calmed down, so we sat up, seeing Cory help Mandy out of the several flannels she had pulled on. "When we get inside and Mom's done gushing over you, you have to tell Beck what you did to his pictures."

"No, don't tell him!" I got up right as he was yanking Beck's boots off of the five year old. "I want to see the look on his face when he sees them!"

Cory sat the boots down and gave me a confused look. "Um, as long as I don't get the blame for it."

"Don't worry, he won't get mad for it." I smirked. "He'll just be insanely confused and it will be the most hilarious thing in the history of the world."

Cory raised an amused eyebrow at me, then looked back at Amanda. "I guess I could be worse off. You could be as awful of a sister as Aly is."

Gwen and Mandy shared a laugh, and Cory received a punch in the leg from yours truly.

If I didn't love him so much and didn't want him to be the father of my future children, that punch would have been higher up than his leg.

Before we left to bring Amanda back and be big damn heroes for finding the lost little girl, I threw the pictures on Beck's desk so he'd hopefully see them when he turned in for the night.

I think Mandy's my favorite Edison that isn't Cory.

"Amanda!" Elaine screeched as soon as we walked through the door, pushing past her two oldest children to get to her youngest. "Oh, my baby, thank goodness you're safe!" She kneeled down and proceeded to hug the daylights out of young Amanda.

"We found her in the RV that Aly's brother lives in," Cory told his mother as he walked past her and over to his three other siblings. He was probably going to tell them what the chizz happened, since they looked insanely confused.

I guess they didn't know about the fact that Beck doesn't actually live in our house.

Then how did Mandy?

"I'll go tell everyone we found her." Gwen scurried off, passing Stanley and Ruby as she did, who walked into the foyer to see Mandy was found.

Elaine composed herself as much as she could and looked down at her daughter. "Sweetheart, why did you leave the house when it was so dark out?"

Mandy pointed next to her, even though there was nothing there, and told her mom, "Hortense told me it would be a good idea."

Stanley had this smug look on his face, as if Mandy had just proven that everything he said about imaginary friends corrupting young minds was true.

Ruby noticed her husband's arrogant expression and slapped his shoulder. "Oh, shut up, Stanley."

Yeah, shut up, Stanley.

/ /

I'd describe the rest of the dinner, but really, Mandy's little escape was the highlight of the meal.

And that's saying something.

And no, Cory giving me the ring doesn't count. That happened before the dinner.

Which was suckish.

But you already know that.

I'm just thankful it's finally over so I can kick my heels off and pretend Stanley and Austin don't exist.

Stanley made Jade leave before she could make out with Beck, so they left my home screaming at each other. Ruby gave us a weary smile and thanked us for the delicious meal that wasn't all that delicious.

At least not to me.

"Bye, my little Asian love muffin," Gwen whispered as she hugged David while the rest of his family said their goodbyes to everyone.

"Baby," David quietly started, "I know that I'm Asian. You don't have to keep reminding me."

"... Fine. Goodbye, my awkward, extremely tall turtle dove."

"On second thought, I'm pretty proud of my heritage."

There you go, David. Quit while you're ahead.

As soon as they were gone, the Edisons decided it was time to head home. Elaine was emotionally exhausted, and that was believable, considering she spent half the evening sobbing her guts out.

Cory pulled me closer to him, giving me a quick kiss on the lips. I guess he didn't want to go any deeper, what with his family being two feet away and all. That wouldn't stop me. Just saying. "Bye. Thanks for an... interesting night."

I scoffed. "If you had believed that story about my family being vampires, you wouldn't have had to put up with all this."

Cory shrugged, giving me an insanely sexy smile. "Hey, I kinda like the insanity that comes with the Oliver family." He leaned closer to me and whispered, "And I would totally risk vampire-fication for you."

"That is probably the most romantic thing I have ever heard." I rolled my eyes, giving him a longer kiss. That is, until I felt someone tug on the bottom of my shirt. I pulled away, seeing Mandy looking up at me with her big blue eyes that reminded me so much of Gwen's when she was that age.

Cory had left to thank my parents for dinner or something lame like that, so I had time to crouch down. "What's up?"

"If Beck gets mad at me, can you please tell him I'm really sorry and that I hope he'll still love me?" The look on her face was so innocent, I just had to keep myself from laughing in it.

"He's not gonna get mad. He'll probably think it's cute."

Mandy smiled. "He's the perfect man. Mama knows how to pick 'em."

Okay, I did laugh that time. But hey, that was really cute.

I shrugged. "I'm just sorry you didn't get one of those pictures."

"Oh, I did!" She pulled something out of her tiny pink purse and handed it to me. It was a picture of my brother at the beach, but neither Jade nor Jamanda were in it. It was just Beck.

And he didn't have a shirt on.

"Um, you found this in Beck's RV?"

Why does my brother have a shirtless picture of himself laying around? He's not that much of a narcissist, is he?

"I didn't find that there." Mandy sheepishly grinned. "I kinda taked it from the icky girl's purse when the lights were still out."

I was speechless. This kid stole from Jade and still had her knee caps.

... Forget what I said before. Mandy is definitely my favorite Edison that isn't Cory.

At this point, she might even have Cory beat.

And before I knew it, the Edisons said the last of their goodbyes and were out the door.

And then there were five.

"Oh my," Jane sighed, yanking her high heels off and tossing them every which way. "That... did not go as I planned."

"It wasn't that bad," Gwen quietly said.

Beck shot her a glance. "The electricity went out twice, we spent half of the dinner looking for a little girl, and the other half mostly consisted of Jade and her dad screaming at each other."

Gwen shrugged. "Dude, I'm just glad no one got kidnapped."

Jane sighed again. "I suppose it could have been worse."

I told you it was going to be bad, Mother.

But I wot say anything about it out loud, because I'm too tired to argue with her.

As James and Jane headed upstairs to rest after this train wreck of a dinner, my siblings and I walked into the living room and Beck sighed. "I guess it really could have been worse."

"Yeah, Jade could have outed your ménage à trois with Robbie and Andre and then you'd have lost your beard." Beck lightly shoved me for that comment, but I took that as an excuse to flop onto the couch. Beck took the spot next to me and Gwen laid on her back on the coffee table.

Um, okay.

Gwen looked at Beck, all upside down and whatnot, and gave him a sweet smile. "Hey, Becky, I left my PearPhone on your desk. Could you get it for me?"

"Uh, sure, I guess." Beck got up and walked out the door.

My eyes connected with my sister's. "You didn't leave it out there, did you?"

"You know me so well, sister dear." She let out a giggle, but it abruptly stopped. "Hey, where'd you get that ring?" She pointed to my finger and after I looked down at it, I smiled.

I held out my hand so Gwen could get a better look at it. "Oh, nothing. Just an amazing gift from Cory, that's all."

"Wow, it's so pretty." She didn't ask about the inscription, so I guess she put two and two together.

For once.

The front door opened again, so I turned around and Gwen sat up. We were greeted by a very confused looking Beck.

"Uh, I didn't find your phone, Gwen. But, um, do either of you know why all these pictures of me and Jade," I could finally see the pictures he was glancing down at, "have Amanda's face pasted on them?"

Aaaaaand the ROFLing between Allison and Gwendolyn commences.