Augh, so sorry for being late, folks. The holiday season was running me ragged, my finals were taking up most of my time and even worse, the words were just digging themselves into the ground. But we're back with the exceptionally long chapter 10! Honestly, I'm really happy that I made it this far. Here's to a happy new year and plenty more chapters. Thank you to everyone who is supporting me!

Also, a pairing approaches!

Warnings: bondage, non-con, oral, all the mind games, Starscream being Starscream

[~]

It doesn't feel like this is over
It's never felt like it's begun
Always looking over my shoulder
Waiting for the end to come

And then you throw it all away
Throw it all away
Nothing I could say
Throw it all away

And you feel like you're still here bleeding
You bleed until there's nothing left
It doesn't seem to ever be enough for you
But leaves you empty in the end

~ "Throw It All Away," Staind

[~]

Chapter X: You Make Me Feel

It hurt. Everything hurt.

Her arms were uncomfortably chained above her helm to the headboard and her Spark chamber was left open for him to use whenever he wished, however he wished. Starscream barely spoke to her during that time, only giving her brief, icy remarks that would be peppered now and then by a warm servo caressing her. And when he would pull away, leaving her alone to state at the ceiling, the eerie silence of the room cut her down to the core.

She had never felt more beaten down and close to giving up.

Stupid, stupid, stupid. I'm so utterly stupid. If I had kept my cool I could have made it farther. But those poor bots...I just lost it. I couldn't stop myself. I just couldn't stop. They didn't deserve what he did to them. I can only imagine just how terrified they must have been…but what did he do with them when he was done?

The door slid open and her thoughts came to a halt as Starscream returned with a cup of energon in a servo. She could swear the temperature of the room dropped several degrees. He shoved her over, none too gently, to make room for himself.

"And I don't even get a 'welcome back.' You certainly are a piece of work." He spat out the words, glaring down at her as he shifted the cup into the other hand.

"Drink, Arcee," he pressed it against her lips roughly. "I said drink."

He forced her head forward and tipped the container slightly upward, giving her a better angle. She held back the tears and drank the energon sluggishly. Her body was thankful for the sustenance, though it pooled in her anxiety ridden tanks and boiled somewhere close to nausea. A few more sobs escaped her, unable to hold them back any longer.

"Don't you dare feel sorry for yourself, Arcee," He yanked the nearly empty cup away and scowled, "You got yourself into this with your little scheme, though I'm still impressed with how convincing you were. It was brilliant, really. Such a shame you chose the wrong individual to work that magic on." Starscream tapped a sharp digit on his chin, "I could leave you like this indefinitely…you certainly deserve it."

"N-no…" she whimpered. "Please, please no. Please don't do that."

"And why shouldn't I? You're making a lovely berth ornament as you are now. Don't you like it when I'm lavishing all of my attention on you? Don't you love it when you feel like the only femme in existence? You've given me a taste of what you can do— I only need to give you a nice push."

He kissed her lips, her chin, trailing downwards towards her rapidly beating Spark. A talon wandered close to the curved edge of her chamber. "And I want more than just a taste. Could you truly blame me for that?"

Arcee felt a sudden drop in her tanks.

Don't.

"You don't need to do that. Really, you—you don't." She tried to stop the waver in her voice, she desperately tried.

His response was gave her a wide rapacious grin, licking his lips and dentals. "But I want to."

Her servos strained against the tight metal, desperate to push him away from her. "Don't. Don't you even dare."

"Too late."

He bent his head to let his glossa gently lick at her pounding life force, and was delighted by the reaction.

She arched her back so beautifully, gasping out a hushed moan and struggled against the cuffs that held her. He continued to let the appendage dance expertly over her Spark, flicking across some exposed pleasure nodes and lapping at the seams around the chamber. Arcee tasted delicious, like a heady meal that left him weak in the knees. But really, he should have expected that.

Arcee bit down on her lower lip and suppressed a moan. He was way too good at what he was doing. She conjured up every ugly thought she had, every nasty image that would churn anyone's tanks. She offlined her optics and focused on those hideous images. Just focus on them and let it all fade away. Focus on them and let it all fade away. Focus on them. Focus.

Then one of his servos drifted between her legs and began to carefully massage that sensitive area. All focus was lost in that one moment.

It didn't take long for overload hit her; he drew it out, long and slow, just to feel her tremble and hear the exquisite sounds she made. Music.

Starscream backed away from the lovely scene, simply admiring his handiwork. She was so pleasing like this: at his mercy, unable to fight back. Primus, he should take a picture, or maybe several. Perhaps send them to the Autobots and see just how worked up they get over it. Who knows, it might even make Prime cry.

No, better to burn this into his memory and savor it. Only he was allowed to look upon this treasure and her many wonders.

"You're beautiful," he whispered. "So very beautiful."

[~]

"Nothing. Not a single thing? You can't be serious."

"Bulkhead, come on. I'm doing the best I can with what I got. You know that." Wheeljack stared out at the Nevada gorge, unfolding his arms. "I've got the ship's sensors on overdrive and I'm not coming up with anything. I know you're worried, Bulk. I understand."

"I know, I know. But Agent Fowler isn't doing any better than we are. I was hoping you would be the one to come up with something, anything." Bulkhead went quiet and shook his head sadly. "It's getting hard, Jackie. Every day I think to myself…this is it. Today's the day we either find Arcee still kicking, or we find whatever's left of her. And sometime I just lie awake and wonder what happened."

Wheeljack's expression softened. He turned away from the setting sun and gently punched the bigger mech's side. "Hey…hey, come here. It's gonna be okay. Arcee is one tough spawn of a glitch, if you don't mind me saying. But if it makes you recharge at night better, I'll take another looksee. That good?"

Bulkhead wrapped a large arm around Wheeljack. It was good; the more help they had, the better the chances are. "Thanks, Jackie. I really appreciate it. Just, please be careful."

"You know me. 'Careful' was my second designation." He playfully kissed Bulkhead's free servo.

"I'm serious." Bulkhead held onto him just a bit tighter. Of course Wheeljack could take care of himself, he knew better than anyone. But… "I don't know if I can handle losing you, too."

[~]

Starscream walked through the door and just sighed.

Arcee's head was turned away, her small frame wracked with sobs. She looked so painfully unattractive that the thought of merging with her, all curled in a ball loudly crying her optics out, wallowing in her own self-pity, just wasn't doing it for him. And here he was so excited to come back and have her help release all of this tension.

Even when he was sitting right next to her Arcee didn't seem to notice a thing. She just kept on crying. He prodded her shoulder, but that seemed to make her even more hysterical.

Damn it. This was just plain sad. Libido officially murdered.

"Alright." He said. Well, that got her attention.

She slowly turned her head, face stained with her tears. "Wh-what?"

"You seem like you've learned your lesson. I'm going to release you now, Arcee." He fiddled with the cuffs and let the bindings fall. She sat upright and dried her optics. "Hopefully this will have taught you something, and don't think that I will forget your little trick. If you absolutely must lie to someone, use that talent on someone else."

She weakly folded her sore arms against her still open breastplate, glad for the simple pleasure of moving. Her mind quieted, though little spurts of thought occasionally skipped on through. Just lay low for a bit. Don't do anything like that again. Get a better strategy.

He grasped her chin and gently forced their lips together. "See? I can be nice. I could have left you like that, but I didn't. What does that say about me? Go on, what does it say?"

She looked at him, not venomously or with contempt—she wasn't stupid enough to throw anything like that his way right now. But she looked at him all the same, staring at his self-congratulatory smile like he had done such a good deed.

Arcee answered in complete monotone, "It says that you're not all that bad."

"Exactly. And?"

"And that you care." Someone just shoot me.

"There we go. Are we going to lie anymore?"

"No." She said between clenched dentals.

"Are we?"

If there was ever a time for the universe to swallow her whole, now would be perfect, "No. I. Won't. Lie. Any. More."

"Good. Very good." Starscream said as he pet her helm tenderly, but Arcee picked up the subtle threat in his touch. "You will make it up to me in due time, of course. But right now," he wiped a stray tear from her left optic, "you need to stop this; it's very unbecoming. I want you to always look your best for me."

Arcee couldn't even gather up the emotion necessary to tell him to frag off. He took her in his arms, holding her firmly to his chest. "You should rest; I'm sure you'll feel better later."

And she murmured a 'sure' or 'fine' or maybe something else entirely. As he lay down with her still enclosed to him Arcee offlined her optics and tried, desperately, to hang on to any sort of hope.

She wanted to be off this flying Pit. She wanted to be with her comrades, on solid ground, back in that old silo. She wanted her cot. She wanted normalcy.

She wanted Cliffjumper back.

[~]

"Prime…Prime, are you there? I have some news, regarding our Arcee situation." The communications relay lit up and the all occupants, Cybertonian and human alike, had the man's undivided attention.

"I am here, Agent Fowler." Optimus stepped forward. Jack almost threw himself from his chair and stood close to the banister, listening intently. "What do you have?"

The man sighed, "Alright. About two days ago a small squadron of some of our best infiltrated one of MECH's many hideouts—this one was on the outskirts of Mumbai. Right before the place went dark they forwarded the all the information they could get. We found schematics, maps, logs, but nothing on the kidnapping of a cybernetic life form."

Optimus' servos tightened into fists, "I…see. The information will be most helpful to you and your government, then. Give the team my deepest of thanks."

There was a pause at the other end, followed by a long, deep breath, "It might not be much to them. When we finally managed to get a steady connection the twenty five who went it were whittled down to just nine. MECH didn't pull any punches…it's a damn miracle some of them even got out. I'll spare you the details, but it wasn't pretty. I have a lot of families I need to write to."

Jack's knuckles turned white as he gripped the metal pipes harder. Raf saw his right eye twitch, just a little bit. The young boy reached out a hand and laid it on Jack's elbow in an attempt to comfort him, wishing that he knew what to say. 'I'm sorry' just didn't seem to be enough. He wished Miko were here.

"I'm sorry that this isn't the kind of thing you wanted to hear, and frankly this makes me worry all the more for Arcee. If she's not with MECH, then there's only one other place she just has to be."

Yes…we know.

"Prime, I have one last question. It's probably something you don't want to think about, but we have to be realistic here."

A pregnant silence followed. Bumblebee willed himself to be quiet. Jack's head bowed and his shoulders began to shake.

"What happens if we don't like what we find?" Even Fowler didn't seem to want to confront this, if the inflection in his voice was anything to go by. Yes, Optimus had indeed faced the likelihood of Arcee's demise, though he did his best to remain optimistic. What happens if they don't like what they find? The only thing they could do.

"Then…we mourn for our loss and fight on. We will honor her memory, and the memory of those before her, by continuing to protect this planet."

"I understand. This is trying for everyone involved. I don't know what else I can do, but if there is, by all means, let me know. And if something comes you're way you think I should hear, don't hesitate. Fowler out."

And the relay went silent.

[~]

Two days later, it happened.

There was a strong energon spike located near the southern end of the Rocky Mountains. They mobilized quickly, lest the Decepticons got to the cache before they did and leave them, once again, without the fuel they so desperately need.

Before they left Miko shouted out, "Be sure you come back with a boatload of energon! Don't let the 'Cons snatch it all up."

And even if they did, they would want some answers.

The trio moved through the green-white GroundBridge, weapons drawn and ready. The entrance to the cave was surprisingly quiet, but further they went the more resistance they found. Too many Vehicons, too little energon.

Watching from a high point in the cave was Starscream, his head tilted to the side as he observed their rampage. From his vantage point he saw Bulkhead grab a Vehicon trooper and scream out something along the lines of 'what did you do to Arcee?' or something like it. The trooper responded with rapid blasts from its guns, and just like that it was history.

He couldn't help it. This was too damn easy.

"You're still looking for her?" Starscream smirked as they raised their optics to meet his svelte form, "I thought by know you would have given up and found something better to do with your time."

{Where is Arcee?!} Bumblebee pointed the business end of his blasters, not that it seemed to faze him any. He just jumped down the considerable height and sauntered over to them like it was business as usual. {Where is she?!}

"Starscream, if you do indeed know of Arcee's whereabouts, it would be in your best interest to divulge that information." Optimus raised both servos. "Preferably now."

Starscream crossed his arms as if to debate whether or not to, indeed, divulge. Three very irritated Autobots stood before him, and for all their bravado he knew they were desperate. He could laugh in their faces and leave them in the settling dust behind him. He could deny everything and tell them to look elsewhere, but really, where was the fun in that?

"Since you're so anxious to know, I suppose I can tell you. While you Autobots were scurrying around on this wretched planet, most of the time in constant peril and low on your reserves, I looked at Arcee and thought, 'what a shame; she must recharge all alone with no one to keep warm for.' It was quite a tragedy, that. So, I decided to take it upon myself to give Arcee the life she properly deserved—a life that she protested, of course, but soon grew accustomed to. Am I holding your interest?"

Oh, yes he was. Their blue optics grew large as they took in every word. The way his captive audience looked at him; it was indescribable how palpable their horror was.

Excellent.

"Arcee was very well taken care of," he chuckled. "At first I thought she would be a delightful toy, and I must confess I did slip up one or twice and play with her too roughly, but she always recovered. No, my Arcee was such a good—"

"YOUR Arcee?!" Bulkhead's green body shook along with his voice, "What kind of slag are you pulling?!"

Starscream glared fire at him, "I'm sorry, I had no idea that you were allowed to speak. Now, as I was saying, Arcee was such a good pet, once I managed to break down those pesky defenses and got her to see just how lucky she was. She fought at first, even cried when I was finished with her, but soon we finally reached an understanding. We had a lot of fun, I'll have you know. I catered to her needs and she catered to mine. But, unfortunately, the entire thing got boring after a while; I had my fun and it was time to move on." He lifted his right servo, letting them get a nice, good look at his razor sharp talons, just to give them a hint. Little Bumblebee seemed to be close to collapsing.

"Do you want to know what her last words were, Optimus Prime? You have to be just a little bit curious." His expression becoming maniacal, Starscream continued.

"She begged for me, pleaded for me to never stop. You should have heard her! So loud and eager like a common whore."

Bumblebee drew back as if he has been punched, {No. No. You're lying. I know her—she would never stoop so low!}

"Well, look at that. I knew Arcee better than you did!" Starscream laughed, harsh and cruel. "She was a writhing mess when I finished her off. Though I was kind enough to not let her suffer—she spent her final moments experiencing pleasure you cannot even fathom. Isn't that such a beautiful death?"

Bulkhead lunged forward and swung his wrecking ball fist as hard as he possibly could, throwing Starscream through the air and smashing against the rocky walls of the cave. Optimus placed a firm servo on his enraged comrade's shoulder, though it did nothing. Starscream collected himself and grinned triumphantly.

"Oh, Bulkhead." He purred mockingly. "Hitting me isn't going to change the fact that Arcee is gone. Maybe if you had acted quicker you might have been able to see me toss her remains into the ship's incinerator. I took her ashes and scattered them to the winds. It was actually quite pretty to see. "

Optimus locked his gaze onto the smaller mech, "Starscream—"

"Yes?"

"Starscream. What proof do you have of this? Until we see solid evidence, then we are not going to give up our search."

Starscream shrugged and straightened himself, "If you insist. Denial is an ugly thing, though. It would be best to just take my word for it and move on with your petty little lives."

"You know we can't do that." Optimus said, his words almost solidifying into steel, "You know."

And the Seeker smirked at him, "Oh, yes…I do."

He laughed and launched himself mid-air, in seconds his body shifting into his natural alt-mode and speeding past the stunned Autobots. They didn't even have the time to watch as he flew from their sight until he was barely even a dot on the horizon.

The energon.

They raced further into the cave, hoping that perhaps they were not too late, that maybe there was still time. Those hopes were dashed as they beheld an empty cavern; what was once filled with large crystals was now

There was a cluster of energon left in one of the crevices; so small and useless that a single bot wouldn't be able to find nourishment from it.

"Ratchet…" Optimus said, "We need a GroundBridge."

[~]

It didn't take a genius to figure out that the second they returned and the GroundBridge switched off, something had gone terribly wrong. It was written all over their faces.

"Where is the energon?" Ratchet questioned. "What happened back there? Optimus, what's going on?"

The Prime slowly turned to face him, "During our mission we did indeed encounter the Decepticons. They managed to get to the energon before we could."

"Wh-what?!" Ratchet had to steady himself. "Optimus, we're low as it is. What are we going to do? How can we—"

{I can't believe he said that…I can't believe …} Bumblee collapsed against a wall. {Why would someone do that? What drives them to—to even…?}

"What? What did who say?" Raf was taken aback by just how crushed his poor friend sounded, "Bee? Are you alright?"

Optimus sadly. He didn't want to repeat the horrible words that came out of the Air Commander's mouth, regardless of whether or not it was true. But they were a part of this, for better or for worse, and they should know. "Starscream has told us that for the past lunar cycle, Arcee has been on the Nemesis…with him."

Miko bit down on her lip, not sure how to interpret those words, "What does that mean?"

"It means nothing, Miko." Bulkhead snapped. "He's just doing this to mess with us."

Before she could say anything back, Ratchet staggered "Arcee?! With…with Starscream?! That can't be. No, that's, that's just not possible. "

"Ratchet, ignore it! It doesn't mean anything!"

"Wait. Wait." Jack's mouth suddenly became bone dry, his fingers trembling, "She's been with Starscream? What else did he say?"

There was no delicate way to put this, no easy answer. But Optimus couldn't lie to them. He just couldn't.

"According to him, Arcee has been his captive since the day she went missing. It was very much planned, as he expressed the desire to give her 'the life she deserved.' She…was most likely forced to share his berth until he received the response he wanted from her. But he became bored, and when he was finished with her…he ended Arcee's life."

Bulkhead slammed his hand against the wall. Miko went ghastly pale. Raf let out a tiny gulp.

"No…" Ratchet gasped.

Something within Jack crumbled to the ground and wailed. So, all of this time hoping and praying for Arcee's safe return was for nothing, then? All of those times he begged whatever god existed that she would be found was just a waste of time? This had to be a nightmare; it was too surreal to be anything else.

But hot on the heels of his crawling despair came something else entirely; something that overtook the shock and beat it into a coma.

"Oh!" Jack exclaimed, indignation rising in his chest, "Oh, that's nice. Wonderful! We're going to believe Starscream of all bots to be telling the truth! He's lying and you know it! Wh-why are we even talking about this?! We all know he's fucking lying!"

"Jack—"

"No, I'm not going to believe it!" He threw his hands in the air, "I'll believe him when he—he gives us some damn proof! And guess what?! He doesn't have any, does he?!"

He spun to the young boy standing still next to him, throwing the shaking hands to his small shoulders and looked at him pleadingly. "Raf. Raf, please. Don't tell me you believe this. You just can't."

Raf trembled, searching his mind for an answer that he could work with. He came up with so little. "I don't…I don't know."

"Starscream is indeed an untrustworthy source," Optimus finally broke through, "and coupled with his past actions he very well may be lying. We must not make any hasty judgments until we can either confirm or deny his account. Until then, we must all keep our calm and not let this cloud our judgment."

For all the reason in the Prime's statement it did remarkably little to ease Jack. The harsh flow of tears came in without any chance of stopping, his grip on the self-control loosening until there was nothing left. He shakily fell to his knees and wept openly.

Raf was the first to comfort him, instinctively embracing him and letting his friend lean into his hug. Miko, on the other hand, gathered every ounce of herself and inhaled deeply.

"Come on, you guys! Get on that ship and get Arcee back!" she thrust an index finger forward. "I know that they have to slip up sometime! Arcee isn't dead and you know it. You all know it! Those shields can't be up forever, and when their guard is down—there you'll be, busting her out and blowing it up! There has to be some awesome hacking technique you're just not trying, or maybe Raf can plug in some numbers an—"

Ratchet balked, "You don't think we've been doing that, Miko?! You don't think we've been here for, what? A full lunar cycle doing everything we possibly can? We have been doing everything—absolutely everything!—and yet we simply can't—"

"You can." She said it as if it were something that just couldn't be disputed. "And you will. Don't let that walking scrapheap tell you otherwise."

She didn't even wait for anyone to respond—Miko had spoken and no one was going to tell her otherwise—as she knelt down to carefully wrap her arms around Jack's hunched form. She murmured words of comfort, saying anything he needed to hear. She didn't know who or what to believe, and that sheer fact troubled her deeply, but Jack needed as much help as she could give.

Bulkhead grabbed the nearest crate to him and crushed it into chips. Did Ratchet need it? Too fragging bad. He could do without it. All he could comprehend was the red hot rage that threatened to manifest itself in ugly ways. Bumblebee had gone silent aside from the tiny sobs that wracked him.

"This is not the news we wanted to hear," Optimus said quietly, "and truthfully I am skeptical of his words. But I will give Agent Fowler this nonetheless, and perhaps together we could separate fact from fiction."

Jack didn't hear him, or anyone else for that matter; he couldn't think of anything other than how messed up this whole thing was. Starscream was lying about everything, he told himself. He's a liar and deserves every horrible thing that happened and will happen to him. Yet nestling in a corner of his mind, already making a nice home for itself was a horrid seedling. The nagging feeling that maybe, just maybe…

What if he isn't?

[~]

Starscream was downright giddy when he came back to his beloved femme, nearly gliding into the room without a care in the universe. The Decepticons had a ton of energon in their clutches and most likely made the Autobots have a collective breakdown. He wished he could see just how pitiful they looked.

From her place on the berth (he gave her a break and bound her wrists in front of her. Definitely not as uncomfortable as before) Arcee stared at him with a cocked brow, almost as if she wanted to ask what in Primus' good name was he so happy about. Much to his annoyance, she remained mute.

He cleared his throat and nudged her. If he really wanted to, he could hit her across the face to get the point across, but right now he was feeling magnanimous. When she didn't respond the first time he repeated his actions until got the hint. Arcee mumbled, "So, how was your day?"

"Thank you for asking, darling," About time. He reclined next to her, folding his arms behind his head as he spoke, "I had quite a busy day. Most of it would probably bore you, though, so I'll spare you the details. At first I thought it was going to be rather uneventful, but you never do know what's in store. At the end of it all, I can safely say that I had a good day."

He smiled at her, letting his right hand caress her fringe. She will never know what transpired; never know what he said to her precious Autobot friends and how he took all the energon right under them. Maybe that's what made his Spark rapidly flare up: the fact that he had won. The servo touching her coasted to the awaiting breastplate. This deserved a celebration, after all.

"A very good day indeed."