Disclaimer: George Lucas owns all.
All She Needed to Know
Angels know no fear, or so they tell me.
No one can tell that you do know fear, and
Gabriel himself can't deny that you've got wings.
Exactly what I feared is your own fears, because I can't protect you
Like I always said I would…like I should be able to, Angel.
Keep me safe, keep me awake
Patience was being lost fast. Trust was being gained slowly. Anakin paced around the room, constantly asking Teref if he could come back to sit by Padmé and hold her hand like he had promised. Again and again, Teref told Anakin that he needed to wait until the check-up was finished. Padmé was still very wary of Teref, despite her husband's continuous reassurances. She convinced herself that the Healer was taking that much longer in order to drive both herself and her husband crazy.
"You really do need to get Anakin to teach you how to shield your mind and its thoughts." Teref glanced up to Padmé's eyes, curious to see whether or not she was angry at him for the comment. She was.
"I wish you would stay out of my mind, Healer Secsa. I don't appreciate you reading my thoughts." Her tone was cool and calm, but her eyes were vicious and threatening.
Padmé… For what seemed like the hundredth time in the last five minutes, Anakin pleaded with Padmé in her mind to go easier on Teref. He wasn't enjoying having his friend and his wife at each others' throats.
She looked up at her husband and gestured towards Teref, who was checking her heart rate. Anakin sighed. This would be a long, painful process if she would not trust his opinions about Teref.
"Your heart is fine, Mrs. Skywalker. Your lungs are also in good condition. Your fever is what is concerning me most at this point, as well as your lack of trust." His statement was met with a glare. "I realize that you don't know me well enough to trust me yet, but you need to be completely secure with me. I need you to be as calm and confident as possible when you go to sleep so that I can be sure that it is only your premonitions affecting you. What can I do to make you more comfortable with the situation?"
Anakin laughed to himself. Teref could be so official and serious when he wanted to be. The business here was completely serious, though, and Anakin was grateful for Teref being so official for the sake of his wife.
"All I need is Anakin. Now can he please come back over here?" Teref nodded in agreement, and Anakin was immediately holding her hand and at her side once more. Through their bond, he could feel her instant relief and calm at the touch of his finger tips. At least he could do that much for her.
"Angel, is there anything else that will make you trust him more? I want you to be completely secure here. This is important." His blue eyes gazed into hers, silently begging to do something that would assuage her fears.
She only had one last question for Anakin. "Has he ever helped to heal you? I just wanted to know."
Anakin smiled. She had no idea how much Teref Secsa had helped and healed him. "Yes. He was the one that attached my metal arm."
Padmé turned to Teref, silently thanking him a thousand times over. "Then I can trust you entirely."
Teref smiled as he looked up at his friend. "If I had known that that would have helped my case, I'd have told her hours ago." Anakin returned the smile. Teref looked back down at Padmé once again. "Okay, Mrs. Skywalker, I need you to go to sleep. I know it's probably weird trying to sleep knowing that I'm here, but I only ask that you try."
Padmé nodded slowly. Because of how exhausted she was, she fell asleep rather quickly while holding Anakin's hand. Anakin became uncomfortable where he was sitting, and he moved to lie down beside her, holding her hand the entire time that he changed positions. If there was one promise that he was going to keep, it would be that he held her hand every moment while she slept. He too was exhausted from caring for his now sleeping wife. He hadn't slept much at all since he had come home. Before Teref knew it, he was the only one remaining awake.
Keep me safe, keep me awake
The night passed nearly uneventfully. At about two in the morning, Padmé began to shiver in her sleep and twist the sheets. Thinking that it might be her fever, Teref touched his hand to her forehead to check her temperature. It was returning to normal. There was no fever. She was having a nightmare.
Padmé continued to toss and turn in her sleep before Teref finally looked to Anakin. His face was tight and contorted, as though he was in pain. Teref wasn't surprised that Anakin was feeling the effects of Padmé's nightmare. After all, the two were connected through the Force. Why shouldn't Anakin feel what his wife was feeling?
But as Teref continued to watch and monitor the couple, he noticed something. Instead of Padmé feeling effects before Anakin, it was the other way around. Anakin was reacting first to whatever was happening in their very similar nightmares. If he turned and mumbled her name, she then turned and mumbled his. Anakin was starting the chain reaction of their nightmares.
Padmé began to break into a sweat and was beginning to thrash about in another wave of her temperature which was beginning to return again. Teref rushed to her and began checking her once again as she slept. Both were reacting more to their nightmares, but Anakin was not showing any physical signs of sickness.
A thought occurred to Teref. If he could wake up Anakin, then maybe it would lessen Padmé's own nightmares. He didn't want to wake her up unless it was completely necessary. Teref rushed to his friend's side and quickly woke him up.
"Anakin. Anakin! Wake up! Wake up now!" Anakin was having trouble waking up fully, but Teref figured he could fix that. "Skywalker, code red! Get up! Now!"
At the words, Anakin was up and reaching for where his lightsaber would usually be. His hand held onto air, and suddenly reality came back to him. He looked down at Padmé, grabbing the hand that he had just dropped.
"Teref, what's happening? What's wrong?" His concern for his wife did not delay at all, unlike his having woken up.
"Anakin, I don't want to wake her up. We should go into the other room." Teref knew that his friend hated being separated from his wife, but he did not want to wake up his sleeping patient, who was getting along a lot better now that Anakin was awake.
At the suggestion, daggers flashed in the Chosen One's eyes. "No."
Though some people would have backed down, Teref was too used to Anakin and was unafraid of upsetting his friend. "We won't be more than a minute, and then you can come back to her side."
"No, Secsa. That's final. I promised her I'd be beside her while she slept. We'll talk here." Even though she was sleeping, Padmé could feel her husband's anger through the Force. She began to shift uncomfortably in her sleep and called out for him. In response, he stroked her cheek with his free hand and whispered to her. "Angel, I'm right here. I'm not leaving you."
Teref saw that there was going to be no argument about leaving the room, so he pulled a chair over to him with the Force. He sat down and waited. In his head, he heard Obi-Wan's voice telling him about how the Force was not to be used for simple, everyday tasks. He shook the thought from his mind, trying to regain focus.
Anakin turned to the healer in charge of his wife's care. "What's wrong with her?"
"Nothing more than there was when you went to sleep, except that her fever is returning. I woke you up because her nightmare was becoming worse. I noticed that she is reacting the same way that you do to nightmares, only she also has the physical issues like fevers. I've also noticed that when you get worse in your nightmare, she follows suit. It's as though you are starting a chain reaction in. I figured that if you woke up, then her nightmares might not be as bad as they were when you were dreaming right along with her."
As Teref had told Anakin the news, he saw his friend slowly falling apart. Once he had finished explaining what he thought was going on, Anakin sat in silence for a minute before slamming his metal hand into the nightstand that was sitting beside the bed. Teref noticed that Padmé stirred slightly in her sleep. She had heard that. "Damn it! What is wrong with me?"
"This isn't your fault. You did not have any idea that this could happen. It is exactly like her having picked up on your powers; you couldn't have known. Don't blame yourself."
"It's my fault that she's sick! It's my fault that she's having nightmares! How can you say that I am not to blame! I should be protecting her, Teref! PROTECTING HER!"
The raising of his voice woke up Padmé. She remained lying down, but her eyes went wide at his tone. "Anakin?" Her voice was timid and unsure.
The unusually frightened voice of his wife shook Anakin to the core. He turned towards her and began to apologize. "Angel, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to wake you up. I didn't mean to hurt you. I'm so sorry. Angel, please. Please, forgive me." His voice cracked, and Padmé reacted.
Her voice soothed him as she sat up to pull him into a tight hug. Teref noticed her wince slightly in pain from the remaining bruise, but her eyes pleaded with him not to say anything…for Anakin's sake. Anakin buried his face in the crook of her neck as she spoke. "It's okay. I'm fine. I'm alright. You promised to protect me and be by my side, and you are. Ani, you've done everything for me." She took his face in her hands and forced him to make eye contact. "I love you, Anakin Skywalker."
His response was automatic, but it was the most heartfelt thing he could say. "I love you, Angel."
"And that's enough. All I need is your love." She knew that he wanted to give her the world, but he was her world. He'd given her what she needed.
Teref felt odd and out of place as he saw the couple share in another tight hug. He couldn't help but ask himself what was so forbidden about love and passion. The code said, "There is no passion; there is serenity." Why couldn't the two be intertwined? Wasn't Padmé the one who helped Anakin find serenity through their passion, their love? The Chosen One was destined to lead the ideal Jedi life. Maybe love was supposed to be a part of that lifestyle.
Keep me safe, keep me awake
Take a stand. Hold my hand,
And we'll breathe in syncopation
Until all your nightmares end.
Take my words. Make them absurd,
But love my dedication.
Safe is when I'm holding your hand.