A/N: Another rewritten and rewritten one. But I like it better now, and you all don't mind the wait right? heh- speaking of which, updates won't be as frequent- my family is about to be on vacation for Christmas, and we'll be busy. But I'll try to be as quick as possible. Oh and I keep meaning to mention- I've done two B/A videos over at Youtube- the link is in my profile, so if you like taht sort of thing, check it out. And feedback is much appreciated.
Disclaimer: Not mine,. Don't sue.
I loved nights like this- where the cold bit your skin slightly, and your breath hung heavy on the air. It cooled my flushed cheeks considerably, which I really needed right now. A houseful of Eames' made for one hot house- and a house filled with drinking Eames' made it worse. We had arrived almost four hours ago- and it was now just after eight. Sean and Mindy had left to take Tommy home- it was past his bedtime. I was finally feeling the effects of the late night last night and exhaustion had set in. So I had escaped outside for a bit of air, which would hopefully wake me up. Last I had checked – which was right before I ducked outside – Bobby and my father had been holed up in his study- exchanging war stories. My dad had served in Nam- he had been drafted and refused to run , much to my mother's dismay. She had always said when he came back- it had changed him. I shivered in the night air and wrapped my coat closer around me.
I hadn't expected it to go this well. I had expected that Bobby would be overwhelmed, after all my whole family was a lot to take. Even for me- but Bobby? Who didn't come from a large family background? At least I assumed he didn't, for all I knew he could have a family of twelve tucked away somewhere, it wasn't something he discussed. The point was I thought this would be harder. More awkward. It hadn't been though. Bobby had immediately been liked by my brothers and father- which made sense. From what I saw of Bobby at work- he fit in well with the good old boys. My mother was practically so in love with him, she might just give me a run for my money. It was him offering to do dishes after supper that did it, I thought. And Liz- well she clearly really liked him, she only tortured those she loved.
I glanced around the yard in contemplation, wondering idly if it would snow tonight. The grass was bathed in a pale blue glow, from the large full moon that was hung in the dark sky. I loved full moons, they seemed to light everything below them up in an almost ethereal way. Everything looked beautiful by moonlight. Almost deceptively so.
"Hiding?" I hadn't heard him come up behind me, so I jumped and possibly screamed a little, turning to glare at him.
"Don't do that!" I spoke in a low tone, smacking his arm as I said it.
"Do what?" He asked, genuinely confused.
"That whole , silent, stealthy, scare the shit out of your girlfriend thing!" He grinned and the light from the moon illuminated his face, he looked happy.
He stepped closer, pulling me against him with a small tug. I fell into him- I didn't really have much of a choice, since I was in heels and there was a thin sheet of ice on the deck. As his arms wrapped around me and I buried my head in his chest, I couldn't honestly say I really minded right at the moment though. His hand stroked my hair for a moment before he tilted my head back and his eyes met mine. "Thanks."
"For what?" I spoke in a whisper, my forehead wrinkling, but still with a slight smile on my face.
"For being here." He smiled softly, lowering his head to mine and placing a soft kiss on my cold lips. As usual, my heart beat speed up at the feel of him underneath me, but I forced my body to relax, knowing that it wouldn't go any further. As I laid my head back down below his shoulder, it occurred to me he wasn't thanking me for being here, physically in this spot right now- but rather, still here as in with him. My arms tightened around his waist as I closed my eyes. Where else would I be? His lips pressed into the top of my hair, right before a snicker crossed the night air, alerting me to the fact that we were no longer alone. Glancing around Bobby, I saw Caleb and Liz tiptoeing across the yard.
"Oh shit." I muttered, and Bobby looked down at me in confusion. I smiled up at him with a laugh. "Some cop you are- the enemy is almost upon us, and you didn't even notice." He glanced over his shoulder and smiled back at me.
"Hey at least they weren't on top of me- where were your cop instincts fifteen minutes ago?"
"That's different." I spoke in a prim tone, my eyes laughing up at him. He arched a brow, and I could practically hear him in my head asking how so? "You're not the enemy- and friendly forces can sneak up on me anytime." My voice was a whisper now, because I knew my siblings would just never let it go if they heard what I was saying. Bobby simply tightened his hold, growling slightly in the back of his throat which sent shivers racing across my skin.
"Alright- break it up. The fun has arrived, so you two need to have three feet between you at all times." Caleb's voice was slightly slurred and I rolled my eyes, stepping out of Bobby's arms and feeling bereft. Caleb would have stepped in and physically separated us though- he was a very touchy feely drinker- when he did drink anyway, which he didn't do often. "Can't be talking to this guy and thinking about his hands all on my big sister-" Caleb laughed loudly, and I grinned watching as Bobby glanced down in surprise, or maybe fear. Possibly both. "And I need to talk to him, because I got us both a beer." He finally finished, presenting the drink to Bobby, who took it with thanks. Not that he really had a choice.
"Wow- and I came with Caleb because he's drunk. And it would be immensely unfair to leave you two alone with him in this state." Liz laughed, watching as Caleb frowned and swung towards her. While he was turned, I took the drink from his hand, pouring it out behind me.
"I am not drunk. I'm merry. It's Christmas so you be merry. They-" he paused for a moment to swallow a breath before continuing. "They even sing songs about it. Merry Christmas- and Happy New Year and all that." He waved a hand and looked down at it frowning. "Didn't I have a drink?"
"You finished and told me to hold your glass, idiot." I spoke in an obvious tone and Caleb blinked, his frown deepening for a moment. Then he smiled and laughed loudly.
"Yeah- I did. Didn't I? Oh look- let's play on the swings! Hey Lex-" He had grasped my sleeve and was dragging me towards the jungle gym. I followed, because if I didn't he would have drug me along the ground regardless. The glass I managed to put on top of the railing before he got to the stairs though. I mouthed 'coffee' back towards the deck and Liz nodded, slipping inside. Bobby trailed after us- as if afraid Caleb would do something. Caleb was annoying and slightly obnoxious when drinking but he had been right earlier. He was always fun. "'Member when we were kids?" He sank down onto one of the swings, pushing off with a foot and waving at me to sit in the other, which I did.
"Is there anything else to that Caleb? Remember what when we were kids?" My tone was exasperated, but my feet naturally pushed off the ground, sending the swing in a gentle arc. Caleb laughed out loud, looking from me to Bobby.
"Yeah- we did- we did a lot of shit when we were kids. Lex used to include me. Sean and Seamus never did but Lexie? She always was there- right Lex? Like this one time-" He was talking to Bobby now, his hands waving and his upper body swaying dangerously in the seat. "Sean and Seamus were gonna climb old smokey- remember that Lex?" He smiled at me and I nodded- glancing at Bobby who was watching with silent laughter as Caleb's hand snuck out and jerked the chain of my swing towards him.
"Uh huh. Old Smokey was this huge ass pine tree in the front yard of our old place. It must have been about fourteen feet tall. I think- I was shorter then, my perception could be off." I explained for Bobby's benefit, knowing Caleb wouldn't.
"Not much shorter" Caleb teased from my left, and I glared while he laughed. "It's nice out here. Way too hot inside, plus Aunt Lisa keeps telling me about her best friends daughter who's so cute and has a great personality. That's woman speak for ugly." I smacked his arm lightly, glaring as he shrugged, gripping the chains and leaning back until his head almost brushed the frosted ground. "Anyway- they were climbing Old Smokey- and Lex was going too- cause where Sean and Seamus went- Lex went. It's been that way forever. But they left her behind this time and she was pissed. I mean pissed. So after they got home, she went to climb Old Smokey by herself- which wasn't that smart, everyone knows you climb in pairs. So I said I was going. Now if it had been Sean or Seamus- they'dve laughed at me. Told me I was too scrawny and to get back inside. But Lex let me come. I loved that you took me places." He looked over at me seriously, but the moment was somewhat ruined by the fact that he was upside down. Sitting up he laughed and stopped the swing for a minute.
"So did you make it to the top?" Bobby inquired from where he was leaning against the wooden beam supporting the swings.
"Hell no- we made it eight feet up and I looked down and got terrified. Lex tried to help me, but I slipped and broke my arm in two places. But the next day I was telling everyone who was anyone that I made it eight feet and next time I'd make it to the top." Caleb grinned as he spoke, and I laughed at his words. Bobby just shook his head. "But we moved here before my arm healed." He frowned, looking across the yard at Liz, who was carrying a travel mug in her hands, steam rising up from it. "I still climbed it though. Lex and Seamus helped me- broken arm and all- the day before we moved. I know that was your idea." He looked to me again, and I smiled back in relief. His eyes seemed clearer- and the night air was clearly helping.
"Here Merry." Liz had arrived , shoving the cup into Caleb's hands. "Mom says you're cut off." Caleb grinned, taking a sip and nodding.
"I agree. Hey Lizzie, come swing with us." He drank the coffee quickly, and Bobby watched as he set it on the ground.
"There's only two swings dork." Caleb laughed at her, pulling her down onto his lap and swinging.
"That's ok- I can make room." Liz was laughing and trying to get up, but Caleb wouldn't let go of her, and had both hands on her arms. When he pushed off a second time, they both slid backwards, falling to the ground in a heap.
"You idiot!" Liz was laughing and scrambling off of him. "I hope you hurt your head- you deserve it." She sniffed and I dragged my heels along the grass, stopping the movement of my swing and standing. I stepped over, giving Caleb a hand up, as he rubbed the other hand along the back of his head.
"Well- that hurt like a son of a bitch." He laughed, frowning and looking around for his coffee. Picking it up, he wrapped an arm around Liz, dragging her against him. "Come on Lizzie- lets go see if I can get more coffee. Then you can play piano for us. Eames family sing along!" He shouted and the sound echoed across the still air. "You too Bobby- everyone has to sing- it's tradition. Away in a manger-" He began singing loudly as he dragged Liz back towards the house, his voice deep and reverberating. I turned to Bobby who still had a smile on his face, amazingly enough.
"So- scared yet?" I asked with a grin, and he put an arm over my shoulders much the way Caleb had done to Liz. His hands were gentle though, and I actually leaned into the embrace.
"Should I be?"
"Yes." I answered promptly and he laughed.
"Are we really going to sing?" He spoke hesitantly and I nodded, grinning.
"Yeah- we always do. Then Mom brings out the coffee and hot chocolate- because you can't go to church drunk- there's a law I think- and she feeds everyone again-"
"But we just ate." Bobby protested in disbelief.
"Yeah that was supper- this food is the snacks. Focus Bobby- Irish folks know how to do three things really well. Eat, drink and repent. Oh- which reminds me. If you don't leave by elevenish, my mother will force you to go to mass." I looked up at him, tilting my head back.
"Are you going?" I nodded, it was almost more of a tradition than actual Christmas morning. "Well I'm not leaving without you- so I guess I'm going to church." I halted my steps, turning toward him and he looked down startled.
"I thought you'd go home alone tonight- I mean- you said you had a thing tomorrow- and I didn't-"
"You were planning on staying the night? I mean- that's fine- I was going to drop you off here tomorrow but if you want to stay with your family- we can totally do that-"
"No! No if you can drive me back in the morning, then I'll go home with you." I took his hand in mine and smiled up at him, and he responded by pulling me closer to his large frame.
"Come on you two!" Caleb hollered from the kitchen. "Let's go be merry for Christ's sake!" He laughed, but was cut off. "Ow! Ma- what'd you do that for- Ow! I know! Alright."
I laughed, leading Bobby back into the warmth of the house with a grin. He didn't know what he was in for.
Seamus had always been the quiet one- Caleb and Sean had always teased and tortured, but Seamus was the one who stuck up for me in his own way, at home and at school. When he slipped up beside me as we all walked towards our church in the cold- Mom never let us drive, saying that at the very least the walk sobered Dad up- I smiled, putting an arm through his. My mother had taken Bobby with her, much to her delight- so I had been walking alone. "You're still here? I feel like I haven't seen you all night." I grinned up at him and he laughed softly.
"Yeah well- you know me. My diversion tactics are at an all time high at Christmas. How've you been?" He looked over at me and I beamed, squeezing his arm.
"I'm good- fine. More than fine. It's Christmas and I'm home, and I'm happy."
"You're disgustingly happy. I suppose we have him to thank for that?" I laughed, and he smiled down at me, slowing our steps. "I just wanted to tell you- I mean I wanted to say- I like him Alex. He seems like a nice guy- but I want you to be careful. I don't want to see you hurt." I smiled, my hand on his arm stilling, and my steps stopping.
"Seamus- thank you. But listen to me- I am so happy right now- if I do get hurt- and I pray that I don't but if I did? It would be worth it. This feeling- right now? Would be worth it." He looked at me seriously before smiling and hugging me.
"Fine- but I still reserve the right to kick his ass if he hurts you." I snorted, moving forward on the slick sidewalk.
"You're welcome to try. I'll say something nice at your funeral." He laughed with me, running a hand over my hair and messing it up. I glared at him, smoothing it back down. "So-" I dropped my voice even though we were half a block behind everyone now. "Did you tell Dad about the transfer?" He frowned and glanced around, shaking his head.
"Lex- it's Christmas. I'm not telling them now."
"Why do you think they'll be mad, Seamus? What you think three cop kids isn't enough for Dad? He has to have four? Do you think he's mad at Liz for not wanting it?" He frowned thoughtfully, and glanced over at me.
"No- of course not. But Liz didn't go through the Academy and be on the Force for years before saying – hey, I didn't really want this so now I'm gonna go do what I want." He sighed softly, looking at the ground as I steered us along the road. "But- I'm twenty eight Lex, and I never wanted to be a cop. I just-"
"Want to do what you dreamed of. And that's fine Seamus- but you need to tell them. You start training in January for goodness sake. One way or another Dad will find out- it should be you telling him, and not some old buddy who heard from a friend about your resignation." We were approaching the large stone church now, and I could see the family huddled in a large group on the stairs, greeting Sean and Mindy and a passed out Tommy who had just arrived.
"I will. Tomorrow, I promise." He hugged me with one arm and we joined everyone else before we all headed inside, seating ourselves in one of the middle pews. My Dad insisted on the middle- not quite the back where the drunks sat- but not nearly the front. I slid in beside Bobby with Liz on the other side of me.
"So- how long has it been since you've been to church?" I laughed whispering in his ear as he flushed.
"Uh- longer than I could count. My Mom would take me as a kid- but she got sick and then couldn't anymore." He whispered back and I slid my hand into his, shocked at the information he had shared.
"I'll help you along. It's mostly Christmas carols tonight anyway, but you can just mumble and listen to me when we get to the profession or the creed." He smiled at me and I opened the book of worship in front of him, turning to the front and handing it to him. "In case you want to cheat." I leaned closer, whispering and he laughed slightly, before leaning back and glancing around with wide eyed wonder. Over his shoulder I saw my mother watching us. When she noticed my stare she simply smiled, nodding and leaning back next to Dad to watch as the service commenced.
Afterwards, it had been a rush to leave the church. Once we had arrived home, I had hugged everyone, telling them I'd be there in the morning. My mother had walked us to the car, giving me one last hug before I left. She held me against her, and I had hugged back, she smelled like spices and ginger and home.
"Alexandra- you hold on to him, hm?" Leaning back she placed a hand on my face, blinking quickly. "I couldn't have chosen better. Drive safe, alright?" I nodded with a small smile, and slid into the car, waving as we pulled away. The drive home was mostly silent, as we listened to the carols on the radio, and watched the lights go by. Bobby would comment on a song every now and then, and I would nod, but not really speak about it. Once we arrived at the apartment, and we were inside, I plugged the tree lights in and told him to shut off the other lights. We sat in the dark, and I stared at the lights of the tree with a smile.
"I can't believe I let you talk me into getting a tree." He spoke with a smile I could hear and I snorted.
"I don't believe a lot of talking was involved Officer. Or soon to be Detective." He laughed turning his face toward me and nuzzling my neck and ear softly. I shivered at his breath on my skin and shifted closer to him. Tilting my head back and to the side to allow him more room, it still sent a shiver through me when his lips skirted along the skin there. "Mmm.. besides which- you like the tree. What's sad is that you never had one before." His mouth was on my shoulders now, as his hand slid my blouse off of them nimbly, leaving me to wonder when exactly he had undone the buttons. His hands traveled down to my hips, sliding them underneath and lifting me up and towards him so that I was laying down underneath him on the soft carpet by the tree.
"I never- had a reason to celebrate before." His words were whispers broken up by his lips on my overheated skin, and I watched him move, bathed in the multi colored glow from the tree. Placing my hands on either side of his face I pulled him up towards me, kissing him for all I was worth. His hands came up to my hair as I did so, and he moaned into my mouth, which sent another shiver of awareness crawling over my skin. My hips shifted and angled under his, seeking a closeness that wasn't achievable with clothes on. I hooked one leg up and over his hip, groaning when I could feel him better, but not nearly well enough. He rested his forehead against mine, his breathing heavy as his hands traced their way down my back to the clasp on my bra. As he unclasped it, he looked at me in wonder for a moment before his mouth followed the path his hands had taken. I gasped slightly, winding my fingers through his hair and arching up towards him. When he made his way down to the waist of my pants, undoing them and sliding them reverently down my legs, I lay before him, unembarrassed by my total lack of clothes. He looked into my eyes seriously for a beat before leaning down over me and kissing my face softly. "You're the best present I've ever opened." He whispered in my ear softly.
I felt my heart contract at his words- knowing that if I didn't love him already- I sure as hell would have fell at those words. I didn't say anything, for fear if I spoke now, I would say to much. Instead I pulled him towards me, intent on doing a little unwrapping of my own. I wanted to show him how I felt, even if I could never say it out loud. I love you.