Hyne Mass
part ten

Author's Notes: Huh… turns out it was the 666th Necrophiliac's birthday yesterday… and I had a burrito!

Disclaimer: I don't own Final Fantasy VIII
Beta-read by the 666th Necrophiliac

My eyes narrow. What is it to them? They want me to drink, I'm drinking. I'm only giving them what they want. Why do they have to give me such a hard time about it? I don't even want to be here. That I'm even present is a big compromise on my part. What do they want from me?

"Forget about them," Quistis advised, taking a flute of her own.

"Hey, I'm just saying…" Selphie adamantly replied, quite unapologetically.

I shake my head. I'm doing what she wants. She dragged me here. Her objective is to keep me here and get me drunk. It's obvious. It's what they all want. Rinoa had just as good as admitted it earlier.

"They look good together." Irvine's comment grabs my attention. I look up to see him nodding in the direction of Rinoa and Zell, dancing together to some fast-paced electronica music. Being unfamiliar as I am, the music itself is completely unknown to me.

"Jealous?" the brunet asks, attempting to gain my attention. More likely, he's trying to provoke me.

"Not really," I reply, continuing to watch the two as they move. A fast paced movement for a fast-paced rhythm. People call this dancing together, despite the absence of physical contact. The reality is: they are dancing in close proximity. Nothing like the dance Rinoa and I shared at the Graduation Ball, but I'm not complaining. As long as I'm not out there, and as long as I'm not the centre of attention, I have no reason to worry. Let those two embarrass themselves. I don't care, and why should I?

Let them have their fun. Let them make fools of themselves. Let them work up a sweat. It's not my problem.

Come to think of it, they could probably use the exercise. Training regimes have become rather lax as of late.

"You're jealous," Irvine mockingly assumes. I shake my head. "Don't deny it."

"Whatever." The cowboy's teasing isn't worth my time. I look about the room to see what exactly the populace find so appealing about these parties of theirs.

More atrocious dancing. Many underage students propped up against the wall in drunken passion, committing that which anywhere other than within garden would be considered rape.

Wait a minute… where are the adult staff? The faculty were disposed of after their coup, but what of the adult SeeD members? It seems like Xu is the oldest one here. And she can't be much older than Twenty….

Now it hits me. The majority here are cadets and underclassmen. Where is everybody? It's plain to see that members of SeeD don't generally live long lives. Still, there are usually several older members of SeeD hanging around the Garden on stand-by at any one time.

Either way, it doesn't really matter now. It's not important. I turn back to Zell and Rinoa and see them in the same place they were moments ago.

"Feeling left out, Squall?" Selphie asks me.

"No," I honestly reply. I continue to watch them. Why should I feel anything from this? They're two friends dancing next to one another.

"Why don't you go out there and dance with Quistis?" Irvine suggested. A stupid proposal, naturally. If I didn't care to dance with one person, why would I want to with another?

"I can't dance," I reply, shaking my head.

"Yes, and I'm sure you said that to Rinoa last time," the blonde accused.

"C'mon Quistis, you gotta just drag him by the arm. That's what Rinoa would do."

"It's alright," the blonde declined, this isn't really my kind of music. I'll stay here."

"Okay," the brunette dismissed with a shrug. "We're going out there." The pair walk over to where Zell and Rinoa are dancing and join in, clearly not seeking an invitation.

"Have fun," Quistis calls out to them as they depart, returned only by a backhanded wave by the newly formed couple as they walk away, their backs to us, leaving Quistis and I alone together.

The two of us, the blonde ex-instructor and myself. This reminds me of awkward situations in the past. Failed conversations and awkward silences.

"She looks good, doesn't she?" I hear Quistis ask over the din of music. I turn to her, an eyebrow raised.

"Rinoa. She was so worried that you weren't going to like her appearance." I turn away, looking back to the raven-haired girl. Right now, at this moment, she looks so carefree. Like a bird souring amongst the clouds. She was concerned? If so, she's hidden it well.

Another question bubbles up within me. Why would Rinoa be concerned? She doesn't strike me as someone who worries about anything. She never has. I turn back to face Quistis once again.

"Why?" I finally ask, voicing my confusion.

"She wanted you to like her outfit. She wants your approval.

"She was probably just fishing for complements," I state dismissively.

"No," Quistis shakes her head. "That's not it. She cares about what you think of her. More so than anyone else." My eyes instinctively narrow.

"Why me?" The blonde sighs.

"If you haven't figured it out yet, I'm not going to tell you." I pick up another Champagne flute and raise it to my lips. Allowing a small amount of liquid to seep through, I swallow.

"You don't know what you're talking about."

"You really don't understand women at all, do you Squall? I release a sigh. So it's come to that. I knew it would be something like that. Quistis may well speak the truth. The truth is: I do know nothing of the inner-workings of the minds of the opposite sex. Nor have I ever wanted to know. What purpose would it serve to know such things? My speciality is with Gunblades and battle tactics. I know how to fight. I can analyse a battlefield and take the best course to achieve my objective. I can defend someone from an entire platoon of hostile troops, and I can quickly dispatch target after target in an onslaught of monsters.

Thoughts and feelings. Relationships and the female mind. These are things that belong in Irvine's department, and he is welcome to them. Not wanting this conversation to continue, I take a drink from my freshly acquired flute. How many drinks have I had now? Three? Four? Five?

It strikes me that I've lost count. Who cares anymore? After all, I need something to get me through this incorrigible bastard of a night.

I don't like this discussion. I don't like where it's going. I don't like this unfamiliar territory. I'd sooner fight an entire war singlehanded.

"You're hopeless, Squall," Quistis jokingly mocks.

"Whatever."

The conversation is over. Once again, I drink.

I know that at this rate, inebriation is only an inevitable stop around the next bend, but right now I couldn't care less. I'll deal with that when it happens. They want me to loosen up. This is the only way. I'm not comfortable with the prospect, but if it happens, it happens. I'll deal with the repercussions tomorrow, if there are any.

It occurs to me that perhaps intoxication is already closer than I might think, but I no longer care. Tomorrow seems like something so far away. Lost in the distance, at the end of a never-ending road. For now, I drink.

Oh dear… I do hope that Squall doesn't become an alcoholic because of this. There has been a bit of a delay. I haven't been writing every day lately. Also, I had no idea what to do for this chapter. The only concept I had was for Squall to watch Rinoa and Zell dancing. That was it. Anyway, hopefully the next chapter won't take long.

I have about half(?) of it done now. It should be up hopefully at least by Tuesday.