Summary:
Tuesday morning and a hell of a lot to do. Max determines to distrust the student from abroad and wants Kate to distrust him the same. In the meantime, she tries to meet with Chloe but bumps into the savior policeman Mark from yesterday's hostage rescue. Chloe can wait… the windmill can wait, too? Max takes her first few baby steps in the only week of 2013 where she can start all over again.
Chapter 10 – Cobwebs on our windmill
Theme Song: Gorillaz – Feel Good Inc.
My head, urgh! Pulsing back wasn't the best idea. It hurt the same way it always did. Gee, how would you ever master your badass superpowers, if you kept up being such a rash bonehead? Now get your thoughts together Max. So, I was worrying about Kate and the danger the German dude could be for her. Pulsing is only painless, when not thinking about anything distressing. Wonderful, the traumatic humming of the whales was almost forgotten. I'll give this crap one short abbreviation. PPD. PissPukeDefecation… at least I've tried to speak coarse. There are simply no words to describe this unbearable pain. My lids open to a small gap. What a relief. I seem to be at the right place, after all.
I'm back on my couch… I get the rhythm of this pulsing and spacing technique. I've teleported myself yet another time. The song by P.O.D. has resumed and finally I got an answer for this bullshit time travelling stuff. I've escaped the German's dorm room by pulsing backwards. As simple as that. If you'd ask me, moving in time and space sounds awesome, right. You wouldn't trade with me for anything. Back to where I was… well, deep inside, I felt myself hitting some sort of heavy barrier. A time boundary, so to speak. I remember passing at least half a dozen of those. By all appearance, it means that 2013 has time checkpoints stuck in it, which 2015 hasn't. After 'breaking through' them, I can't go back and change stuff.
And about changes, oh man… I've got one big day of chances ahead. If I mess up somewhere at the end, I'll loop back and the entire day resets. But remember Victoria and the German student? Both vanished under my very eyes, on Monday's second attempt. They disappeared at two very different fixed points in time mind you. And now I'm here again, back on my couch after trying to get farther back to the showers, where Kate has found me. Attempt has failed, no kidding. Not feasible, Max. You decided not to answer Kate's advice in the showers. The advice to open a door for the helping hand. Just like, when I ignored Warren at the entrance of Blackwell… Anyhow, this is my first go within this Tuesday. Hella lot of opportunity.
I look to my left and think about the song, all over. At the same time, I see a flash drive inside my stereo. It is my own music, apparently and not the German's. It strikes me, that I liked his band and searched for more on the web and stuffed it on my own flash drive. I wonder how many other songs made their way on this flash drive because I liked what others heard. Man, I don't fucking know. Everything could be. Get your ass up and get dressed. I grab my bag and leave my gloomy dorm room. For the first time in my life, I determine to lock my door. While I'm locking the door, I realize that someone has also written on my slate in the top-left corner.
you are versatile
We all are. Thanks for the compliment, idiot. Taylor and Courtney have left Victoria's door. Good golly, she cranked up the volume. I hear the door wiggling in its doorframe. Let's blow, before Victoria's door pukes in my direction because I'm not clothed in her mandatory dress code. I leave the girls' dorms and take the stairs to the boys'. Back at the boys' dorm entrance. I watch to my left and fuck, what the hell? Two armed stationary policemen are guarding Nathan's door. What's wrong here? Yeesh, they didn't even have the time to clean the bloody footprints. You want the students to walk over a dead student's blood? That's crazy. So, where is Kate? Didn't she say that she'll wait for me here? Well then, let's check the dorm descriptions to make out the newcomer. Oh, somebody really had to write a lot on his small slate,
Hemingway once wrote, "The world's a fine place and worth fighting for." I agree with the second part. - William Sommerset
Wait a second. Wasn't that out of the outrageous movie "Se7en"? Good grief! Kate, you know what he might be up to, when he quotes from this movie? An antichrist murdering defenseless people in God's name. If there's anything as bad as Arcadia Bay, it would be the world out of that movie. Our mundane world. What's this? Kate's violin? She's in there playing along! I press my right ear against the door. I close my eyes and try to perceive the melody. Tough luck, she has just finished playing. What a pity. I merely heard one or two harmonic notes and I could stick here forever… with my ear pressed to the door until it hurts.
The German guy… gosh he needs a name. Alfred… yeah, I'll call him this in my mind. Where was I? Alfred chuckles and talks to her, "That was great. Next time you'll cover one of my favorite songs?" – "Which one?" Kate asks him merrily. Alfred answers instantly, "Beautiful…" ah, I knew he would call this one, "…by Apocalyptica. They all play the cello, but I think you can simply cover this with your badass violin." okay, never mind. Kate puts her instrument aside and… silence for a second.
"I think I'll go to the entrance now and wait for Max," she explains. But there's so much silence. What are they doing in there. My ear starts to hurt and sweat. Maybe I'm pushing it too hard against the door. Kate utters a sigh and continues, "Have you talked to her, yet?" – "Not, yet but I have seen her, yesterday. She walked into Blackwell. She looked… lost and confused. And we all know… that has happened after that-what… has happened." Alfred answers her in his half-broken English. Thanks for the wannabe compassion, asshole! Kate sighs again, "Y'know, she could really use some friends. So please, don't try any weird moves once she's here, you understand?" – "Yeah," Alfred agrees. Shit, my ear hurts! I can sense my heartbeat via the wooden veneer from the door. "I know this must be hard for a guy like you, who's trying to help others, all day," Kate has concluded. After this she adds, "Oh man, ruining her book was such a mistake. Wish I could change it," What book? Did I borrow her one of my books? The Kraut's not responding. Oh, he repeats his sentence, "Although I can't help you out, I want to say thank you."
"Hey you! Step away from that door!" one nervous police officer yells at me. Are you serious? He walks towards me. I step away from the door. His heavy body thumps on the ground and makes the floor shake. Even the door vibrates. It's your mind, Max, just hallucinations. He's not that heavy, alright? Nonetheless, his posture tells everything. One wrong word, Max, and you are screwed. Man, I know this face, it's the spiteful policeman from, yesterday. "Didn't you hear me? Go away from the door and mind your own business!" he threatens me. Do something Max, fast. I should wait until he understands who he is threatening. "You! Again! I knew you're up to something… Cornfield, right?" wow, he really is a douchebag. By far, one of the biggest assholes I've ever met, Jefferson excluded. So, what, now? Tell him your real name and order him to calm the fuck down or keep up the silence. Or should I carefully tell him that I was kidnapped, yesterday? "This is my last warning Miss…!" he threatens me more and takes one step more into my direction. Before he turns violent, I should- "What's…" the door behind me is opened by Kate and Alfred. Kate assumedly has just started asking, what's the matter.
"Max, are you making friends with the police," Kate smiles. "Spare me!" the wicked officer grumbles, changes his posture back to… normal and heads back to the other police officer. The other one has been talking to someone on his phone, all the time. Thanks for not helping me out, jerk. You all are ruthless douches without the slightest amount of mercy. Why is the police so stressed, recently? I turn myself back to Kate and Alfred, "Sorry… guess, I found your room," I try to make this look innocent. "What was his problem?" Alfred wonders. He needs a more applicable name. Siegbert! "Max, you there?" Kate asks waving around with her hand before my face. Siegbert tries to smile, though he seems to struggle with something. "Come in, why staying here?" Kate suggests. "Have you eavesdropped? Be honest with us," she also wants to know. I'll avoid her question, "I don't want to be here. Don't like the police," while showing with my hand in his direction. He hasn't stopped frowning, yet.
"Can you lock the door, please? I'll leave my violin in your room, as long as we are on the road," Kate asks Siegbert. Gosh, this name makes all of this so damn funny. "Sure, I basically lock doors behind, anyways," he responds, walks to his desk and grabs his keys. I've just realized how tidy and clean it looks in there. And also, darn empty. Boring dude, all the way. Still don't trust him. We should get to the Two Whales Diner. And as soon as he walks away, goes to the toilets or leaves to call somebody, I'll tell Kate to watch out and to distrust him. I'm scared that he will hurt her.
She's a good soul and doesn't need to be endangered again. "Alright, where do you want to hang out, Max? Whoa, you are early. How fast did you change?" Kate reacts surprised. "Two Whales Diner," I answer them both. "Yeah I know that diner. Got my main apartment somewhere down there. I hired a car for some time, Max," Siegbert adds. Yeah, I heard all this before. But now it's real, right? Asides, he's got an apartment and a dorm room, extra? Superrich snob! This guy reminds me too much of Nathan. We don't need yet another weirdo who endangers my friends.
We are leaving the dorms. Blackwell looks so dead and empty. I think, I had some thoughts about Blackwell being empty. Beautiful academy with no students to teach, except for me. A poltergeist hovering around in the hallways. "Max, where're you headn'?" Kate asks while I'm walking towards the street. Shit, I lost my way due to my wonderful chain of thought. Siegbert tries to talk with us, "I think it's a great idea to get away from here." We've reached the parking lot. Siegbert has slowed down his pace for us. I remember him literally running away. Obviously, Kate must've told him to decelerate for our sake. One car on the parking beeps unlocked. Good 'ol lady, Warren would normally drive you. Now it's the German's property… Siegbert starts the engine and shifts into the reverse gear. Goodness, the dampers are worn off like hell. My butt hurts, already. For the first time ever, I'm thankful for the German's help. To escape Blackhell academy.
"So how did you meet each other?" I'm curious. I really mean it. How did Kate and he become friends? How did he get here? "Mind, if I won't answer?" Kate evidently asks the German dude. "Sure, please give me a minute. I'm not skilled with driving and talking, at the same time," he answers composedly. After half a minute, he draws a deep breath and talks,
"End of July, I wrote to some universities here in the states, but none of them accepted my application because I haven't finished the junior high grade. So, I posted my concerns to some blogs and Kate had answered me. And that's… the story." Kate instantly steps in, "Not quite the full story, though. Since you Max, warned me about the vortex-party, I stayed in my dorm room and prepared my homework. However, on one evening, when all Blackwell students were partying, I got very stupid messages from a German. Haha, he was so nervous and cute," Kate laughs, Siegbert smiles and chuckles at the wheel and hides his face with his left hand embarrassed. "And since then, we didn't stop chatting. I told him to get his driving license as fast as possible, because he was almost done with it, and… then I asked Principal Wells," Kate goes on. The Kraut concludes, "And he agreed to an an- annual stay here in Oregon. Though he couldn't offer me a dorm room, then. I also had to choose between two schools. High school for design in Germany or Blackwell Academy in some hicktown, where nobody knows my face."
Jesus Christ, this is how he made his way here. But I still want to know his reasons for coming here, "Why did you leave Germany?" I ask him friendly. Siegbert looks rather sad after my question. "Can I tell her?" Kate offers him a little worried. He says 'yes' really quiet. "He had been abandoned and wanted to blow the cobwebs away by moving away from town. And it was I who responded to his messages. It was I who took care of his mind. Max, up to this day I'm pondering on, what if I ignored your warnings, and visited the vortex-party, regardless. Our friend wouldn't be here," she explains everything. "Thanks once again for this," Siegbert shows his gratitude and looks over his shoulder to give her a smile. He's wearing his glasses again. Creepy, why is he changing his pair, all the time? "I'm proud, you are there. But, I'm regretting the day, where Nathan-…" – "We don't want to talk about that," the German interrupts her. Yeah, good point you've got there. I got enough answers, anyway. And best of it, they are valid and comprehensible.
We've reached the Diner's parking lot. Siegbert folds his glasses and puts them away. He subsequently asks us, "Hey, can you recommend this diner?" Déjà-vu for the win. "The diner is terrific!" I try to iterate my answer from my second Monday-run-through-attempt-thingy. "Terrific?" Siegbert doesn't understand that word. "Awesome, great, swell, wunderbar!" Kate helps and laughs. Yeah, ain't such a bad idea to learn German since they had played a crucial role in our past century. In our history. "Someone wrote stuff on my slate, today. You know what's going on?" I ask both of them. I see the impatience. They want to get their breakfast. But before we leave this old wreck, I want to know, if they know. "I wrote, 'you are versatile'. I gave you the P.O.D. album and some fresh guitar strings. But you were asleep." Siegbert explains. I think he should get a last name, as well. How about Dongle? Siegbert Dongle. Sounds perfect!
Kate laughs, "You don't know 'terrific', but 'versatile'… no biggie?" Mister Dongle smiles, and chucks his pair of glasses inside the central console. With thumb and forefinger, he digs into his eyes. His face cringes. "Everything fine, St-…" – "I'm good, Kate. Can we all here agree to something important?" Siegbert interrupts Kate. Dang she has almost said his name. What was it going to be? Stefan? Typical German name. "Go ahead," Kate opens the door because the burning heat inside of this car rises unbearably high. "I don't want to talk about yesterday. I don't want to talk about my shit. I'm here to forgive and forget," Siegbert wants us to know. Kate smiles a bit and says, "Ah, fair enough. How 'bout you, Max?" The German dude looks deep into my eyes. Creepy as fuck, I change my view to Kate on the backseat. "Kate, I really want to share something with you," – "I think it's between you both. I'll stay here in my car and call back a friend of mine," the German answers quite reasonable.
Kate distrusts my idea to talk to her in private. I get out of the car. It's so weird, seeing Warren's putative car parking at the Diner. Without Warren being present. I'm afraid that we'll see more different things like those in the next few days. "What is it, Max, why can't he go with us?" Kate really wants to make us friends. We enter the Diner, I look behind and see the German's silhouette inside the car on his phone. He's not a big liar, mind you. Kate turns a little impatient. She's getting nervous but I try to ignore it. Damn, I've never experienced her this vivid. My changes really turned her wit and temper upside down. Skyrocket high however compared to the old Kate, I had to take care of. I stop at the notorious corner both where Chloe and I had sat, all along. Joyce isn't here, today. What the fuck, it is Tuesday! Snap out of it!
Kate sits, where Chloe would've normally taken her seat. "So, what is it, Max? Please…" Taking a deep breath, I'll try to say everything she needs to know. I love her and trust her in whatever reality we're stuck in. I decide to tell her the unholy, painful truth.
"Kate, trust every word I say. I know I've been through a lot, but this all is supreme truth," I exhale and think. Kate calms down and nods to agree. "Your fingers, Max," Kate brings something to my attention. I glance down and realize my shaking hands. Thanks, now I feel it in my neck, too. Yet, I try to continue, "I'm not supposed to be here. This here isn't my reality. All my choices will affect others and I lost control of it," Kate doesn't understand it and asks, "What is this going to be? Our daily life routine is spilled with choices, Max." – "It obviously was my decision to warn you about the vortex-party. It was I who attended all the parties instead. I… do have supernatural powers." I just… does she even trust this crap? I've just noticed that I had attended all vortex-parties instead of her. But why did I even go there and didn't use the time together with her, or with Chloe? What was my point? Masochism? I'll muse more about this later. I'll wait for Kate's answer.
"What powers?" – "Manipulating time and my current position. I saw you and the German dude hugging albeit I wasn't there. Right? I saw your necklace swaying in the air. The cross spinning. Please, do me one favor. Don't trust him-…" but Kate aggressively interrupts me, "Nonsense! 'I shouldn't trust him' you don't even know his name, do you? You don't know anything about his sorrow. No one can pretend their pain! Prove that you can manipulate time." her right arms tenses as she clenches her hand to a fist. Why is she this enraged? "Max, I know you've been through a damn lot. I swear to God, I'll be there for you but don't you dare trying to get my friends out of my life! I won't be toyed with!" I see the lighthouse in the distance. Almost a thin white stripe because it's so far away. I need to get there, too. My phone vibrates. A message on Chloe's phone, again. Kate awaits my answer eagerly.
"You know? I never drove in his car up to now. We didn't listen to his music during our ten-minute drive, either. I know he's listening to "The Dear Hunter" and before that "Kota by Bonobo". And I only remember this because he really has been here – at the diner – before. But he won't remember it," I reply. The German guy enters the diner. I see him looking inward. Are you afflicted to some kind of déjà-vu? Kate can't answer. "Moreover, he quotes a little inner thought from the detective out of the movie Seven. A macabre piece of film about the seven deadly sins…," I conclude. Sins are something important to her. I think this might convince her. Now back to my old train of thought. Why did I attempt the vortex-party? "Eh, can I join you?" Siegbert has made his way to our booth. "Yeah, I'll… scooch over, wait," Kate moves over and Siegbert has a seat. I look down on Chloe's phone. What message has she – or I – received?
I FUCKING HATE EVERYTHING!. COMEe ALONE OR I FUVKING BAIL ON YOU!
Ankle-deep in shit again, Chloe? Kate asks the German, "So, you are listening to 'The Dear Hunter' and 'Bonobo'?" – "Uhm, how do you know?" he reacts confused. I get up and squeeze myself out of the booth. Kate looks away from us. "Sorry, I've gotta go. I actually wanted to meet with a friend here and we could hang out altogether. But she has some… yeah," I apologize cheaply and bail on them. When I've almost left the booth, I turn back and ask Siegbert for his real name. He touches Kate's arm and tries to gain attention. She refuses and shakes her arm out of his soft grip. "What's your name fellow Kraut?" he apparently hasn't expected such a question. In his left palm is some sort of brown marble. With all fingers, he plays with it tensely. His red streak doesn't protrude as much, when there is no sunlight. He doesn't answer me. I think, I tore him away from his beloved Kate. Sorry, but no one will hurt her ever again. I'll leave you here. Kate distrusts you henceforth.
Let's bail. Get to the lighthouse. That's a long walk but… right, Chloe wanted me to meet at the swings. May I try to pulse to the beach or go on foot? Argh, Jesus! It's so tough to decide. Regarding the last two minutes as a tough choice, I shouldn't fumble with my pulse powers shortly after. Gosh, the sun burns a hole in my head. It better should, because my brain really wants to escape my body. I think, Kate needs a bit alone time after all the things I've told her. I feel bad for the poor German. It seems likely that Kate was his only friend at Blackwell. I'm shredding friendships, now. Whoa, let's get to Chloe. I think David has made Chloe's life a living hell again. That might explain her weird last message. I walk across the road, heading for the beach.
I write Chloe a fast message back.
there in ten minutes
I send it and suddenly, I smash into someone. Max, you'll never learn, right? I fall to the ground, holding Chloe's phone tightly in my hands to prevent it from being damaged. I don't want to use my time-powers, yet. "Gosh, I'm so sorry… Max?" a familiar voice. Somehow, I know his name, "Mark, what are you doing here?" – "I'm in charge for my last week here at Arcadia Bay. Next week I'm going to change my location to Portland," Mark pets my arm with a humble smile on his face and picks me up from the bottom. He's wearing a pair of mirrored sunglasses. I recognize this familiar face. He dragged me out of the dark room. The meek officer from yesterday's interrogation in my room and from the rescue. He showed selfless care. "I'm refueling the cruiser. Got pretty dry on the road. So, what are you doing out here? Aren't you supposed to be in hospital?" Mark asks me worried. I don't know what to answer.
"You know, I could use a break. It's giving me delight seeing you alive and kicking. You want to keep talking inside the Diner? I've got something to talk about." – "Yeah, but I've gotta meet someone." I smile. Mark is a new face to me and I'm really curious about what he's up to. I'm sure that he's a cool and nice guy though. Sorry Chloe, need a little longer. "I make it quick but we'll eat something, for sure!" he says and enters his patrol car and parks it next to the German's old lady. I cross over the road and join him while getting out of his cop car. I start to believe that I'm losing so much time here, but Mark surely will tell me important things. So… sorry Chloe again. His view is fixed to the German's hired car. "Uh man, haven't seen such an old ride in years." then he changes his sight to me and grins. 'Making friends with the student from abroad' my ass. But this guy might be worth a try as a real friend. "Let's go. I know you're short in time but… you wanna eat something, I'll pay for us both. Damn, you look so skinny. You've gotta eat," Mark invites me and folds his fancy shades. I still catch the same apprehension in his eyes, like they were in the dark room. Albeit he's not stuffed into bulletproof vests and other armor-like things around his body.
He holds me the door open. I look at him. Black short hair, really tall – but who isn't next to me – and damn thin, too. Famine of Oregon says hello again. The German Siegbert Dongle walks towards us and quietly says "Goodbye Max, talk to you soon." in passing. Mark looks at me and shakes his head shortly after while getting on the barstool. "Man, this dude got an eerie accent." – "He's not from here," I answer briefly. The waitress shows up behind the counter and waits for Mark to order. "Same as always?" a cute voice barely reaches my ears. "Yep, and a big mug of coffee, please. Long day ahead," Mark turns to me on the squeaky barstool. "And you my little angel, what do you want? Don't spare no expenses, haha," he continues. With a diffident smile, the waitress chuckles and waits for my call. "I uhm-" I can't think about anything tasty because my last thoughts were about Mark and the thoughts that before about Chloe.
"Make it the same and extra spicy for me, please," he orders for us both. He cracks his knuckles. Ouch, please don't repeat this. Someone pokes on my shoulder. It's Kate. "I thought you've got unfinished business with an old friend. You know… I don't care… but I trust you with what you've said. Give me a call, whenever you need me," she says in a really bummed way. Poor Kate. I think she really liked that unholy Siegbert. "Watch your back, Kate. Take care of Dana, she didn't neither look good nor look well," I decide to tell her. Help syndrome needs to be gratified. Kate nods and leaves the Diner. She takes the next bus. Apparently, she told the German prick, that she wanted to go home on her own.
"You've got some strange friends, oh darling… Why am I joking around…?" Mark comments my last two encounters. I try to conclude, "Yesterday was pretty much… a fucked-up day," – "That's putting it mildly," Mark retorts. The waitress serves him his mug of coffee, "Thank You, Miss," and he almost empties the mug with one big sip. He moans, "Gosh, that was long overdue. I must tell you something," and talks about whatever has been on his mind. "You are a strong girl. Yesterday's abominable occurrences are nothing to crack jokes about. But you… Max, you gave me hope. Believe it or not, if Mister Madsen wasn't calling us for help, I don't know what else could've happened to you," Marks fingers quiver. His left hand has grabbed the mug. The waitress serves us two big plates of yummy tasty fast food stuff. Can't wait.
Mark bows his thanks. Man, such a polite guy won't cross you every day. He continues while chewing on a slice of bacon, "Two students were using a private drone modified with an illegal repeater. But without that thing they wouldn't have tried to fly above and beyond Blackwell. And luckily, they've spotted the abduction," – "Mark, that's how it was, but why are you telling me this?" I wonder. "I'm married. My wife and I, we were expecting a child. And… eh… six months ago, my wife went to a regular sonography to check our daughters condition. 'I don't perceive her heartbeat' the doctor had said… and I wasn't there because I was needed at work," Mark squints.
Heavy stuff, but why is he telling me this? "And yesterday… seeing you helplessly… crying and strapped to the chair revived something inside of me that hasn't been alive ever since my wife and I lost our little girl. I saw your gaze through my thick layer of glass. I was in awe of a weak girl. A gasp of awe… when I realized, that the little girl in front of me was beyond my own powers. I felt so weak under my thick layer of armor and bulletproof clothing." Mark takes a little break and empties his mug. He moans aloud and shoves a loaded fork into his mouth.
God, I can't tell what I'm feeling, right now. During his long story, he has kept up full eye contact. Although his eyes seem to be weary and tired all along, yesterday's occurrence seemed to have helped him. I'm sorry for him and his mistress. Mark swallows immediately and goes on, "Every night I dreamt about the first drawn breath of a newborn and its first cry. Seeing your sudden cry of fear gave me… mental superpowers. It was like you had waken me. After our yesterday's deployment, I fell into my bed and slept through the night with no unholy dreams. You are a miracle, Max and you gave me a new hope for Maria's and my life. I told her about it and I guess, it helped," he finishes. Oh my, I need an excuse for not being able to fricking respond. For I take the fork and shove this tasty stuff into my mouth. I do this even though my stomach doesn't need food, anymore. His two long monologues killed my starvation.
Hmm, tasty. I think my brain gradually reconnects with my stomach. Maybe I can finish this heavy meal. "One more refill… of coffee… please, ma'am." Mark lets the waitress know. "Mark, I can't describe what's going on in my head, at the moment," I lie to him. To be honest, I don't know what to say at all. Mark sighs and looks down. "I saw a doe, when I was carrying you to the ambulance…" now he really becomes a likable guy. Suddenly a thought strikes my mind, "You're planning to begin all anew?" Oh shit, I've stricken a chord, haven't I? I take another forkful of heavy fat food. This heavy themed stuff deadens appetite. Not as if I'm not used to this shit. "I came to terms with my problems, after we've saved you! Now I'll bring the following to your notice: Embrace your family as long as you've got one. Consider there's someone very important in your life and from one day to the other, this person ain't there for you," Mark lets me know.
Mark speaks on, "I heard that Mister Madsen harassed you a lot. You can think what you want about this asshole, but… if he wasn't there… we wouldn't talk right now. I'll entrust you with something. He has been through war. Now married again to a mother. His stepdaughter is a wild soul. And I tell you something else: There's nothing worse for you to lose. It doesn't matter whether it's family or friends, people will always change and deteriorate after they've lost someone close. You helped me, to get rid of my phantom pain. I know this is a weird way of saying it, but, 'thank you so much for that!'" Mark scratches his right temple and supposedly thinks about something. In the meantime, I shove the next forkful into my mouth. Mark goes on with it, "There's nothing worse than losing someone, who was never actually there."
Good grief, thanks for murdering my appetite. Chloe has contacted me again. I startle and look down to my… her phone. "Is that someone special?" Mark asks me. "Yeah, why?" I wonder. Meanwhile he softly touches my right cheek and removes a little tear. "Go to this person as long as he or she's there," Mark tells me. He grabs his refilled mug of coffee and drinks. "Please give me your number! I want to know someone who could be there for-" – "Here, take my card," Mark wants to hand me his card. I refuse, "I'll write it somewhere else, do you have a pen?" – "Yeah uhm… here you go!" Mark drags a green pen out of his pocket. I copy his phone number on my wrist. "I see, you want to keep track of things?" Mark asks me while contemplating me taking notes on my wrist. "Recently, yes… thanks," I thank him and return his pen. "Now go to your friend! I have the sense that you are running out of time. I'll catch you later!" Mark makes a rapid head movement to tell me, I should leave. I open the door and leave the diner. Meanwhile I check Chloe's message on her phone. I turn around one more time to say, "I betcha!"
where the fku are you max . im waiting here forever
She has written like two minutes, ago. Time to get my ass moving. Damn, this conversation with Mark was a pain and a salvation. Though I really hope, both he and Kate prove right with their faith in love and humanity. Ouch, can't run so quick. My stomach hurts instantly. Great, I should've drunken some water. Nothing in my bag, either. Nice, I'm well prepared to survive four hours at a time.
I reach the parking lot in front of the beach. Magnificent, no beached whales on the shore. Fuck my life, I totally missed the opportunity to ask Kate or Mark about the snowfall. Was there even a snowfall. If not, there should be no danger in 2013, at all. I've reached the swings. Chloe is smoking. After the chit-chat with Mark, I could leap for joy seeing her alive and kicking. Gotcha, Max, you really leaped for joy.
Chloe gets up from the rusty old swing and… oh shit she's not in her brightest mood. Moreover, is she drunk? What's wrong. I'm standing still instantly, her expression killed my attempt to crack a smile. What's the matter? "You better… have… know a damn explanation for this bullshit or else… you saw me for the last time!" she threatens quite drunken. I can smell the scent of beer coming out of her throat. Her voice isn't stable, I think she fights against her feelings. She whips an envelope out of her bag and nudges me aggressively. I lose my footing and plunk on the sandy ground. Ouch, shit. My right elbow has rammed onto a shell. Thanks for the blood. Chloe doesn't apologize for hurting me. She comes up close to me. Her shadow engulfs me. She drops the envelope on my face while taking the next pull on her cigarette.
"Don't you dare opening it! You fucking lied to me! You'd better have a good fucking reason!" this time her voice cracks all the time. Despite her being upset, I can clearly see her legs quivering. I try to get up, the shell still sticks in my skin. Small trails of blood dripple on the sand. I remove the shell shard, "Ouch, shit…" I curse. "Forget it, Max. Nothing matters here anymore. You are a fucking witch and nobody will care about your tainted blood on a hicktown beach. But stepfuck will care a lot," Chloe reacts pissed off. I grab the envelope and try to open it.
"What the fuck do you think, are you doing?" Chloe retakes the letter. "What's wrong Chloe. I… I don't understand." – "Are you really this dumb? You lied to me, yesterday! I trusted you… and you said that you are the author of all those letters…," Chloe falls on her knees and cries. I crouch and try to comfort her but she denies and nudges me away with her right arm. "What are you, why are you here?" she whimpers. If I can't touch her or do anything else, the only thing that comes into my mind is 'our windmill'. "Tell me more about the windmill," I try to revive this almost hopeless conversation. Chloe sniffles and answers me shortly, "Look at the giant house with the lights." – "The lighthouse?" I turn around and look at the building far away from us. The heat and far distance tints its shape blue and some kind of vapor disguises the ground. What a great moment to take my next picture. I know my wall of photos contains almost dark themed imaged only. But this magnificent piece is a must. If my eye could scream, it… I… just take the damn picture. I grab my instant and focus. Damn, the blur is real. This takes forever to find the right focal distance. The camera clicks and damn. My finger hindered the flash. Ah, whatever. The swallowed-up flash won't change anything. Nice print. Sigh, you can never escape the lighthouse.
"You really remember nothing from our childhood?" Chloe discerns disappointed. I twist my right arm to look after my injury again. Chloe approaches me, her shadow drops on my arm and masks all visibility I had about the cut. She grabs my wrist and reads the notes. The joints in my wrist crack. Ouch, gee thanks Chloe! "red miracle," she whispers aloud and startles. So, what next? Will she break my bones? "Let's blow. I'll show you our windmill. You will remember once we're there. But it'll be rusted and the stairs will squeak," she determines and heads towards the entrance of the muddy pathway. Why this sudden change? Why did this note on my wrist change her mind? And while we're at it, why does everything save my ass I had no control of. Neither was "The red miracle" consciously written by me nor was the abduction something I had determined by my own free will. God forbid!
The wound doesn't look too shabby. Should be fixed by my body if there were any reserves left. Good thing I've just eaten. Not much, but better than nothing. Chloe has made a fair way off. Before getting back to her, I should definitely listen to some music. I'd die without my mp3-player. I just want to hit play, but I'm curious what song might be on the list, this time. "65daysofstatic with When we were younger & better", yet another great post rock song. Besides, the song's name tells everything. And I forgot to mention, that I haven't looked after all the changed albums on my bookshelves. All I can tell is that this one is a great piece, too. In the far distance, Chloe waves at me. The heat has increased to the max. Chloe looks like a flame because the heat distorts everything beyond a hundred yards. Doesn't change the fact that she's as thin as a rake with red hot hair on her head. Better get going before she evaporates or worse. I'm really curious about it… our windmill.
"C'mon slowpoke!" she screams via the muddy pathway. I remember her tensed and stressed tone. I hid inside the wardrobe and David slapped her face. Good job, Max. I'm also a bit curious about how I managed to write all the letters. I mean, how did I write an entire story? Apparently, Chloe has received yet another letter which has rendered her distraught. Yeah, I lied to her. I confirmed something I had no idea of. Basically, there's no potential writer except me. But this coincidence – that she received yet the next letter - turned my initial statement into a downright lie. Mind you, Chloe's partial meltdown has almost resembled her breakdown where she and I snooped around in Frank's RV. When she found out about Rachel's romance with Frank. Luckily, she has caught the note inside my palm and calmed instantly. "Stop daydreamin' slow-" – "Yeah, I'm coming." Funny that I know the rhythm of Chloe's way of speaking. Concurrently I lower the volume on my player.
We've reached the lighthouse. Damn what a long walk. Felt like three miles. Chloe looks kind of nervous. "You ready?" she asks. I nod. With her right hand, she draws attention to the card on the tablet. We both go there. Strange, the pirate fortress isn't marked on the map. What happened. "What about our pirate fort?" – "You mean the junk yard? Later…" Chloe can quickly answer my question. What a relief. At least, there are still some adventures kept alive from our childhood. "Don't you see our windmill?" Chloe asks me fairly bummed. "No, I don't get it," I'm honest with her. With her pointer, she draws from the shore up to the lighthouse, leaves the tablet and shows up to the lighthouse as she turns around.
"Ta-da! …why won't you remember?" she wonders and heads to the lighthouse. Isn't the door locked? Ah, never mind then. Don't rely on anything here. You are wrong Max. I should go back to the current reality's name. To Shit-Array. Chloe tosses her cigarette away. What the hell? She drugged herself with grass? Smoking pot plus alcohol? Nice combo… forget it. "Will you scientifically investigate dump or will you climb up on our old rusty windmill?" she asks. I follow her to the rusty door of the lighthou- excuse me, I mean windmill. Wherefore did we call this old gizmo 'windmill'? The spiral staircase up really shows its age. A seedy lighthouse that we used as a secret lair in our childhood. Apparently, our pirateship had been keeled over or sunken, long time ago.
A few more steps and we've reached the highest point of Arcadia Bay. Whoa, getting seasick up here. Chloe chuckles. So easy, to leverage her mood back to normal? Whom would you trust, if we said, we would be normal, if anything? The door wiggles and bends with the wild wind. An annoying squeak through the cylindrical structure. I should increase the volume on my mp3-player, but I'd rather put it back into my bag. Urgh, the door hasn't been used in ages. Chloe has somehow squeezed herself through the narrow gap, or… maybe I should attend a gym and train my bones, because my muscles are totally gone after this painful workout. Ouch, my wound has scratched along the metal doorframe. Shit, I need to get this wound fixed.
I lean against the rusty banister and enjoy the strong wind which makes my hair flutter in all directions. Chloe holds an old cassette-player in her hand. The cassette inside plays back, although she's not wearing any headphones. The player has stopped. She turns her - literally mesmerized - gaze to me. She smirks and I'll try my best to return this adorable smile. "Watch out Max!" Chloe pulls on my arm. The railing, I've just leant against breaks apart with a loud zing and smashes down into the sturdy rocks. Wow, I've just realized how strong her hand grabbed after mine. I've got enough phantom pains around my body, now she's made the next imprint.
"Huh, a déjà-vu," Chloe thinks aloud. The wind bellows around us. Why did she drag me up here? "Déjà-vu? Sounds like you've had the choice to let me fall instead. Thanks, my red-haired angel!" I thank and embrace her. Finally, she doesn't refuse closeness. "Do you remember, now?" Chloe talks to me while I don't let go off her. "Hmm, not really. You should start explaining it all over again," I kindly ask her. "First, let us go away from that broken railing-part. This old lady's parts are coming undone." – "Sure, so what's up with this windmill?" I want to know first. We walk clockwise and instead of the sea we now watch the old hicktown Arcadia Hell.
"When we were younger, we've been listening to the Gorillaz all day long, remember? Uhm… anyways... One day in 2005 or four, maybe, they made this new very popular song 'Feel Good', remember that one? Maybe?" Chloe tells the story. I nod and keep listening, "Anyhow, this lighthouse was our hiding spot throughout our childhood. But it was too tall and huge for a pirate ship. And lighthouse sounded lame. Then, a few days later, you showed me the official music video. And there, you could see the windmill… floating in mid-air, in the clouds, so lonely, so forgotten… we used the term 'windmill' to give our hiding place a new name. A cool name. Ah, by the way, can you give me back my cellphone?" Chloe unfortunately interrupted her great story. But sure, she can have it. We are swapping our phones.
"Anything else happened?" she's curious. But I decide to shake my head. I can't tell her, right now, that I read the threat. She should confide in me or… keep up the distrust. I'm afraid that this day's letter had messed her up a lot. I will understand. Her phone vibrates. It seems like the next message has arrived. I check my messages, in the meantime she checks hers,
Honey we tried to reach you don't be afraid we will be there for you. dad and I, us reached a phone call this morning. Please stay in the hospital we will take care of everything. No time to write I'll help your dad stowing our clothes in the car. Xxoo mommy
This message arrived at 8am. The next one blows my mind. Near me, I get the feeling that Chloe begins to cry, but I need to read,
Hye honey we've been driving for an hour and we've been contacted by some mister prescott. He offered us to stay at the prescott estates for as long as we want to because he heard what had happened to you. please call us back we know almost nothing. I'm worrying sick. mommy
Holy moly! I watch to my right since I've really gained the feeling that something is utterly wrong. Chloe is crying louder. Good call, Max. She stuffs her phone back into her pocket. What's the matter my friend? I walk towards her and want to console her. She immediately turns away and runs down the stairs. I follow her. "Chloe, wait! What happened?" I call her but she doesn't react. Her cry echoes through the cylindrically shaped lighthouse. Our windmill with-…ouch! Shit! One stair couldn't hold my weight and broke apart. My entire leg slices along a metal piece inside the wall. This thing is decaying. We should never get up there again. Isn't this supposed to be under some sort of maintenance? Who is in charge of checking this thing's current condition? Ouch, I scratched my leg. Abrasion with some blood. Shit, hopefully no metal slivers. I pull my leg out of the painful gap. Some light would be a relief in this staircase of darkness.
Normally, I'd just rewind and heal myself by the time-powers, but I never tried to self-heal any injury. Chloe stands all alone at the bench. Holding her cassette player again. I can see how distressed she is by just looking at her veiny hand. I walk towards her but she warns me, "Leave me alone," without her sounding like she's crying any longer. "Chloe, I-" – "Can it!" Chloe interrupts me. I look after the tree stump. No dagger, thank God. But on the other hand, I see letters carved into the wood. It reads "If trees could speak" yeah, they'd really tell us mean things, wouldn't they? I sit down leaning with my back to the stump and search for "Feeling Good from the Gorillaz". Then, I'll look up to the old and destroyed lighthouse and imagine it had propellers or wings and what not. A mild gust of wind blows fresh sea air into my nose. Whew! What a day… again and it's still early in the morning.
Chloe turns her head and frowns a little. Oh man, all this is just wrong. "The red miracle" … stop it, Max. Don't search for any answers, search for a way to get Chloe happy and some flesh to your loose bones. Now, my parents are on their way to Arcadia Hell, too. Great, I'll ask them to leave together with Chloe. What's the reason for her being so upset. Chloe heads to me, during I've finally found the right song on the playlist and hit play. "Rachel wrote me. Frank has some kind of relapse and she wants to come home…," with a vacant stare somewhere between the tree stump and me. "That's great we can see her again!" I say delighted.
"You don't know jack!" she says totally disconcerted. I think it's better to leave this place. "Chloe, I've got so many questions, but I know you don't trust me, right now. After all, I need your help, if you want me to get out of my future misery. We should go to the junk yard. I'm curious about what I've changed," finally, I can speak properly. Chloe thinks about my words. Then she asks again, "Why did you lie to me? There was all the time in the world and you used it to lie." She's utterly right. I'm an asshole. And I can't change this. It was my decision and my curiosity. Given the fact that the letter was absolutely written by me and even addressed to me. The philosophical question: What allows me to be in the right? How do I prove right although I was just guessing? "I think you don't know what to answer, right?" Chloe digs it.
"Look at me!" Chloe screams. My ears even hurt with music on them. I feel one tear leaving my left eye. "Why did you LIE!" Chloe shakes on my shoulders. Somehow, this doesn't shock me. I'm used to this crap. I'm sure that the letters, she has been reading up to this point, meant a lot to her. I sense that they might've replaced the love that her father had been giving to her, back when he was alive. Chloe's strength abated abruptly. Her arms lose a lot of strength but her hands don't leave my shoulders. She cries and digs her fingertips into my scapulae. Her legs anguish. She lays her head on my chest and tries to relax while tears are leaving her eyes. Gosh, her breath smells of alcohol… "Feeling Good" has just finished. Well, this tune ensures the maximum relaxation. Chloe has her next meltdown. She shivers everywhere. Even the grass beneath her body quivers with her. "You know what's the worst of it?" she asks me after a long time of keeping up silence. I mutter something akin to a simple 'no'. With my right hand, I massage her head a little. My small fingers unfortunately can't reach the entire skull. After a while Chloe confides to me, "I still love her."