This chapter was edited/revised Saturday, April 2, 2011. If there are any mistakes in my revisions, please let me know.

Chapter 10

"Kagome," the voice on the other end of the phone breathed in relief. "You actually answered."

"What is it, Kouga?" I asked wearily.

There was a pause. "Are you okay?"

"Oh, I'm just peachy," I replied bitingly. "Thanks for asking."

"What's the matter?" he asked, and I frowned at the concern in his voice.

"Like you care," I muttered.

"I do care, Kagome," he said solemnly.

"Well…" I sniffled again, and impatiently wiped at the tears that still leaked from my eyes. "You shouldn't."

"I'll never stop caring, Kagome," he insisted.

I huffed. "I don't think you ever cared about me, so you can stop saying that right now."

Another pause. "There's a difference between being an idiot and not caring."

I quirked my brow. "Is that so," I said flatly.

"There is," he pressed. "I was stupid to do that to you, Kagome. I'm sorry."

"Oh, save it," I began, but he cut in.

"I've wanted to say this for a long time, Kagome, so please let me," Kouga urged, pausing to make sure I was listening. "I wouldn't blame you if you never forgive me, but I just want you to know that I'm sincerely, truly sorry to have done such a thing. I lost you, and that will be my biggest regret."

"Kouga, I get it," I said quietly. "I'm not ready to think about because—because I'm still angry, so damn angry about it that I can barely stand it."

"Okay, Kagome," he murmured, then added, determinedly, "I can wait."

I was about to say goodbye to him, unable to stand the sick feeling twisting my gut, but a question niggled at the back at my mind. I hated myself for doubting the truth behind it, but…what if Inuyasha wasn't lying?

I cleared my throat. "Kouga, I have to ask you something," I said uncertainly.

"Anything," he encouraged.

"Did you…" I paused, gathering my thoughts. "Someone said you brought alcohol to a party at Ginta and Hakkaku's house and a lot of people got drunk off of it. Is…is that true?" I cringed at the awkwardness of the question.

There was a long pause. "Why?" he asked, as though trying to figure out the importance behind the question.

I huffed impatiently. "Would you just answer yes or no?"

It seemed like he hesitated once more, unsure of the consequences of his answer, before sighing and saying, "Yeah, I did it."

My breath caught, and a short sob broke free of my throat.

"Kagome?" Kouga probed frantically. "What's wrong? Are you crying?"

"You bastard," I whispered tremulously.

"Kagome?" he repeated falteringly.

"How could you do that, Kouga?" I demanded. "You would never do something like that! Why would you do such a horrible, horrible thing?"

"Jeez, Kagome," he said defensively. "I was a tad upset at the time, what with our issues and all. It was just a little vodka. Why are you so angry?"

"You," I hissed. "It's your fault my dad died—!"

"Whoa!" Kouga exclaimed, offended. "You can't go around accusing people of that stuff, Kagome!"

"It's true! My dad—he was hit by a drunk driver," I choked. I might have been hyperventilating. "Someone that came from that party," I finished in a low voice.

"I—are you sure, Kagome?" He sounded very worried. I felt bile in my throat.

"Yes," I whispered. "I'm sure."

"Shit, Kagome, I didn't know…" He trailed off, unsure of what else to say.

"No, I suppose you wouldn't," I said scathingly. "I have to go. Please stop calling me. I just want to be left alone."

And I hung up on Kouga, his apology just barely reaching my ears before the line disconnected. Curling into a ball, I let the misery take over me.

I startled awake. My face felt tight, the tracks of tears finally dried on my face. I glanced at the clock. 10:00pm. I frowned when my stomach growled.

Wandering through the kitchen, I took pause when I found some instant Ramen. Inuyasha likes this, I thought randomly. I heated it up and ate it, thinking of the day's events.

What a mess my life had become in just a few short days. I supposed I owed Inuyasha an apology. The thought of facing him again made my stomach flutter nervously. What if he never forgave me? What would I do then?

I thought of a better way to apologize. Booting up my computer, I wondered if it wasn't cowardly to do it this way. Pushing those thoughts away, I opened up my email and quickly composed a letter.

When I had read it, reread it, and read it again, I hovered over Send. Closing my eyes, I pressed it, and opened my eyes to the screen merrily telling me my message was sent. I hoped it would be enough.

I hugged my arms around myself, wondering if Inuyasha was even still awake. To distract myself, I went and took a shower, taking extra care to make sure I was squeaky clean, and then just lingering until all the hot water ran out. I stepped out, and I should have been thoroughly relaxed, but all the tension returned to my shoulders as soon as I reached for my towel.

I carefully dried my hair to be shiny and smooth. Finally returning to my room, dressing in my favorite light blue jammies, I woke up my computer, holding my breath.

No new messages.

My heart fell, but I forced myself to reason he must be asleep. It was almost midnight now. I sighed and laid down under my covers, flipping my pillow over to the side that was not still drying from my tears. Enough of that, I told myself firmly. It's time to be strong.

I kept my eyes on my computer screen across the room for a while, but it switched to my screen savers soon enough and I found myself staring at a picture of my family. I smiled at the memory.

We were on vacation at the beach. My mom held baby Souta, who had a wide hat protecting him form the sun. My dad was smothered in sunscreen, and I was absolutely red with sunburn. But we were all smiling anyway. My teeth were gapped with lost baby teeth, my hair in pigtails. I wished I could be a happy little girl again.

A sad smile on my mouth, I drifted off to sleep, not noticing when my screen beeped and stated that I had one new message.