Chapter 10 – Tag your it sucker

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As we entered there was calm before the stupid happened. Maybe Draco was right about the Bogart as it was ridiculous. The Bogart's were all in Dumbledore's office trying to scare each other and then us. They were in the form of the Ministry and Dumbledore followers.

"He's killing people all over the country side Dumbledore we must take action, the public demands it." Fudge was the lead off idiot.

"Cornelius he is but a student how can you say that he has done anything but protect himself?"

"I know he is hunting people down and killing them, just look at poor Moody, he killed him most horribly. "

"I take exception to that as I am sitting here and not at all dead." The real Moody snarled.

"Well you know what I mean and what about the bunch he killed by Little Hangleton."

The discussion or argument went on and on, Dumbledore was not going to let go of his weapon and Fudge had his agenda. So everyone was unhappy, the meeting was ajourned with nothing done. Actually when Fudge stormed out of Dumbledore's office was the first call for adjournment. Dumbledore started his attempt at twinkle manipulation of us while Snape had his caustic complements.

That wrapped up the year and everyone went home. It was hilarious watching Dumbledore trying to direct us to the Weasley's and then we left.

We visited with Nick and Penny but I took Adriana's thought's seriously and we move to our villa and made some rounds and updated a few bribes. We flashed to America and did the sights, some nice, some a disappointment.

I sometimes shook my head at the things we did. We were on break and what did we do? We take our NEWTs in potions and DADA but we left transfiguration and charms for school. We passed with 'Os".

Then it was time for the Hogwarts Express and school all in all it was an enjoyable break. Adriana then laid the law down; she would have elves in her household. I was to have one as she did and a third for the odd stuff. Since I am a dumb American Vince Jones I have no idea what this entire elf business means nor how to get any.

Now I was about to have a fit over the elf she wanted for me but again it's either shut up and be happy or say something and get the wrath of the wife. I almost did say "you're crazy" when a note dropped in my lap, it was a short note. "Shut up!" Lura.

The house elf was named Dobby and was the Malfoy's ex elf. That alone was my complaint. The nutter was as crazy as I was. He bounced around like a grasshopper on steroids. Dobby couldn't tell me anything about the Malfoy's as it was some elf taboo to snitch on your ex master. Dobby had been traded in on a newer model so that was that.

Adriana had found two other elves. One was older than Methuselah and the other was a young elf. I will not even tell myself as it nuts, no way was Adda the old Dumbledore elf. How long did these elves live? The other was a young female who was sold as chattel. I was not happy with the whole business. Adriana made my brain mush after I raised a complaint by kissing my shorts off. Just a saying but I wished it was more my hormones were telling me to go, go, go! I has been a long, long time.

I am Vince Jones, a clone produced by Albus Dumbledore to imitate Harry Potter. I have found Dumbledore's dead sister who I want to do things with that my old life says go for but my current life says don't be hormonal. I have no experience with a man-servant even if it's called Dobby. I get up in the morning and shower. Then I select my clothes and then head down to make breakfast. That is normal Vince Jones living as me. Now I have my clothes laid out on the bed, no choice there. Breakfast is on the table although it consists of my favorite foods. The whole thing is strange. Then it got stranger as I made a mistake, no it was not a mistake it was just me. I found Dobby was really trying to make my life happy? Anyhow I started treating him as a person and that was the mistake that wasn't. It would show up later in our crazy lives.

The carriages arrived at the front of Hogwarts for the start of school. The welcoming feast was looked forward to by everyone and took the edge off having lost all the free time on break.

Some welcome, first there was this toad of a woman dressed in pink and not the black professor robes of Hogwarts.

After a boring dissertation she quit croaking and sat down. That is until the next class that Adriana and I were to attend that we didn't attend. In the headmaster's office the yelling raged.

"He is required to attend classes while a student of Hogwarts" yelled Umbridge.

"I have already passed your course Madam Umbridge."

"That's not the point."

"Please excuse us Headmaster Ministry stupidity gives us a headache." We left.

We were now almost reading each others thoughts so when I or Adriana said "we" that's what we ment. Something was telling us our bond was moving forward but we did not yet know to what ends. That brings me to Dobby and we wondered if he read minds. There was a problem about our hidey hole we call the villa. Dobby hauled in an elf of a man who could fix the problem with a bribe of course. I had not asked yet asked how Dobby knew who and how to fix the problem but Dobby had a meeting arranged for the proper bribes to be paid.

With no potions and no DADA we zeroed into charms and Professor Flitwick. Flitwick was a blast and was soon asking Dumbledore to advance us in class. Dumbledore of course refused to so we got in class training from Flitwick. While everyone else was working on lifting a feather we were dealing with advanced dueling and charms.

Hogsmeade Village weekend came around and we were just like everyone else, very excited. We wanted Honeydukes chocolate and Zonko's dung bombs. What we got was Deatheaters by the dozen.

We were down by Scrivenshaft's when dear old Voldemort's vile troops entered the village. To say the least they lasted about two minutes as Adriana and I unloaded our skills on them. There maybe a couple to escape our wrath but not many. Adriana and I headed to The Three BroomSticks for a drink. Unfortunately they would not serve us anything stronger that a butterbeer so we left.

/Scene Break/

The 'Floe' flared and everyone in the room looked up in expectation. Voldemort's Hogsmeade troops were late in returning, everyone in the room knew of their lateness. Everyone still expected a report on their great and glorious success. Voldemort's ire was well-known for late reporting and he was quite liberal in handing out his displeasure for failure. Alecto Carrow fell out of the 'floe' with a look of terror on her face and her hair still slightly smoking. A putrid odor of burnt flesh filled the room. The port-key necklace for use in an emergency was melted around her neck and seared into her flesh. Voldemorts loyal minions took one look and started to ease out of the room before they got caught in Voldemorts curses for failure.

/Scene Break/

"Well if the Three Broom Sticks won't give us what we want lets head to some where that will." Adriana huffed.

"Remind me to get the twins or Dobby to lay in a supply of liquor this looks like its going to be a long war."

The next thing we saw was Rita Skeeter of the Dailey Profit checking out The Three BroomSticks. In an attempt to elude the pesky reporter we headed to the Hogshead for a drink of something stronger than butterbeer. The Hogshead was noted for not following the rules. To say we were not thinking could put Peeves in as Headmaster of Hogwarts.

"Adriana?" Aberforth Dumbledore unlike Albus was not one to put it off as coincidence of nature and got right to the questions of how and why she was alive.

Adriana was trying to explain that she had no memories of being Adriana Dumbledore. Aberforth just went on asking about her life and asking how she got control of her runaway magic. It dawned on me that what was taken as uncontrolled magical outbursts might have been the precursor to being an Elemental. Not that this went on for very long as Rita Skeeter buzzed in with her quill furiously waving in our direction.

If that wasn't enough I spied a couple of the 'Order of the Phoenix' members in the corner. Well so much for these secrets remaining secret or us not being the talk of the town. A note fell into my lap.

It was a short note, "RUN!" Aura.

That's when a Ministry owl flew in and the note was the last straw.

Harry, I have just quit the Ministry so I am no longer under any compulsion to help them. They have appointed a Deatheater Augustus Dolohov as the head of the DMLE. The Minister has issued arrest warrants for you and your wife for fifty counts of murder and other Dark Arts violations. Dolohov has orders to use the unforgivable's if you resist. I would recommend you two hide as you both will be in Azkaban or dead before morning.

Amelia Bones.

"Rita how would you like a real story?" I gave her the information that was in the note from Amelia. I told her the Prophesy Dumbledore was hiding from everyone and since everyone wants my hide or hates me I wished them the best of luck. If they believed the prophesy, good luck, as we were leaving England to its own little cesspool of existence. Adriana gave her story of being killed by the two best friends Albus Dumbledore and Gellert Grindelwald." Telling Rita that Harry Potter was leaving England forever which was probably good for a headline if the rest didn't meet headline standards.

Rita had a very good question, "Harry how can you leave, they will just come and drag you back to England to stand in front of the Dark Lord or a trial."

"That Miss Skeeter might be a bit of a problem as I am no longer a citizen of Great Britain. They may find that trying to drag a foreign national with diplomatic immunity has a few drawbacks at the ICW."

The front door burst open and Dolohov and several Aurors started throwing curses. Dobby popped in and grabbed our hands. We found ourselves in an alley next to the caldron shop a second later.

"You no show your secrets now, now you go, Dobby has packed you belongings at Hogwarts. Dobby will meet you at the villa." POP!

"Well that was efficient. I still don't understand how he knows?" I mussed.