May 2017

Denver, Colorado

Mos Eisley Cantina

When Ben strolled into the Mexican restaurant he grew up frequenting after basketball games, he was relieved to see that almost nothing had changed. The floors were still in desperate need of cleaning, the bar still served eighteen types of tequila, and his senior basketball jersey was still hung on the wall above one of the booths towards the back of the place.

To this day, Ben figured it was the only time he had ever seen Han truly proud of him, standing in the Denver Coliseum, cheering his team on to a State Championship win.

But that didn't matter now. He was his second day into a week-long trip back home. It wasn't often he was able to take lengthy breaks outside of the holiday season, so the two weeks of leave had come as a blessing in disguise. He immediately flew home and would spend the other week just sleeping and reading in his apartment back in San Diego.

Those breaks were always the loneliest. But, after time with his family in Denver, they were necessary. He always needed some time to readjust. Being around his family was sensory overload.

Following Poe and Finn, Ben slid into one of the familiar booths, taking a moment to inhale the smell of garlic and lime and steak. It made his stomach growl and momentarily distracted him from the way Poe babbled on.

"Anyways, you remember the guy I told you Rey was seeing a few months ago?" Poe asked, before grabbing a menu and tearing into it.

Ben glanced away from the menu in his hands and towards his brother. He did remember. For some reason, the news gave him trouble sleeping for a few nights, but he was pretty certain that was due to some bad turkey the canteen had fed them.

But that was in February. Why was Poe bringing it up now?

"Yeah, vaguely," Ben responded, as passive as ever.

Poe yawned and pointed behind Ben. "Well, they're still together and they're joining us."

Ben blinked before looking over his shoulder, his eyes immediately landing on the incoming couple.

Dressed in a figure-hugging white dress and a pair of sandals, Rey looked ever as beautiful. Her brown locks were halfway pinned back, leaving some of the soft tresses to glide across her neck with every step she took. Beside her, Snap wore exactly what Ben expected a Princeton graduate to wear to a cheap Mexican restaurant.

The moron wore a blazer and pair of khaki pants.

Ben's eyes dropped to their hands, flinching as soon as he noticed their attachment. He cleared his throat and turned back to Poe.

"Good for her," Ben muttered, before glancing back at the menu.

But his reading was immediately distracted as the couple appeared, sliding into the booth and exchanging hellos with Poe and Finn. It went silent for a moment, and Ben just knew without looking that everyone was waiting for him to acknowledge their presence.

He set the menu down and met Rey's familiar, hazel gaze. "Rey."

"Ben. Welcome back," She began, just the sound of her voice causing his heart to beat a bit faster. She smiled at her boyfriend and looked back to Ben, "Snap, this is Poe's brother, Ben. Ben, this is my boyfriend, Snap Wexley."

Snap grinned and held out his perfectly manicured hand. "Nice to meet you! Thank you for your service, man."

Ben sighed and shook the guy's hand, knowing he needed to be polite. "Likewise," He mumbled, before focusing back on the menu.

Unfortunately for Ben, Snap wasn't satisfied with just a hello. "So, I've heard so much about you! You're in the army, right?"

Ben couldn't help but tense up. He set the menu down and glared at the man across from him. "Navy. I'm a SEAL," He explained, desperately trying to keep his voice polite.

Snap nodded, as intrigued as ever. "That's so awesome. You guys killed Bin Laden, right?"

With a squeak, Rey gently smacked Snap's arm. "Snap, come on. You know he doesn't want to talk about that."

"Right, right, silly me! Hey, so who wants to hear the craziest story? So once my dad officially signed the company over to me, I inherited all of these ridiculous—"

But Ben wasn't paying any attention to the Princeton prick. Instead, he couldn't look away from Rey, watching her every movement like a hawk.

And maybe it was the few margaritas Poe forced him to have, but he could have sworn she was too busy watching Ben to listen to Snap, too.

-x-x-x-

July 2018

Somewhere in the Atlantic

It seemed to rain for an entire day straight, the downpour outside of their shelter absolutely brutal. The sun never seemed to truly rise the following morning, and by midday, Ben was already whispering about the possibility of a hurricane. That made Rey sick to her stomach, for once drawing attention from the soreness in her head.

So, they stayed coped up in their shelter for what seemed like thirty-six hours, Ben wrapping her tight in his space blanket to prevent her shivering, every few hours making her drink from his canteen or eat a banana. And sure, it was scary, and cold, and all Rey really wanted was a cheeseburger, but it certainly wasn't as terrible as it could have been.

"We're not going to die, are we?" She finally asked, approximately twenty hours into the rain storm, "Because I always figured my last meal would be of the fried variety."

Unfortunately, Ben didn't laugh, unamused by her joke, and instead pulled her tighter into his arms. She tucked herself underneath his chin, warmed considerably by his wide frame and strong arms.

"I'd never let anything happen to you, Rey," He mumbled, his lips pressed against her hair, "Even if we're stuck here forever."

As she lulled into another cat nap, the sound of the rain filling her ears and the warmth of Ben's body keeping her sane, an image popped into her head. One of her, and Ben, underneath the waterfall, clad in nothing but their skin. But they weren't alone. A tiny child, wearing just a diaper made of palms, rested peacefully in Rey's arms.

She groaned. What a cute thought. But then she thought of childbirth without modern medicine and that quickly put her to sleep.

-x-x-x-

When the rain finally stopped, and the sun reappeared, Rey was thrilled to climb out of the enclosed shelter and stretch her legs. Poe and Finn went to work on rebuilding the fires, and Ben immediately went to catch more fish, since almost two full days without protein was starting to get to everyone.

Mainly Rey, of course. No matter how many bananas or mangos Ben fed her, her stomach seemed intent on growling obnoxiously loud. She couldn't help it, really. After a childhood of not eating, followed by a life of constant eating, her body had a preference.

So, within two hours, they all sat around the fire, enjoying grilled fish and pineapple, a welcome alternative to their previous meals. By the time she was on her second fish, the words out of Ben's mouth almost made her pounce on him right then and there.

"I think I saw avocado," He started, before biting into his fish, resting on the weaved palm Rey had worked on days before, "It looked like it, at least."

"Avocado?" She practically cried out, her body nearly shaking at the thought of the green delicacy being added to her diet, "Don't fuck with me Ben!"

Finn snorted and handed Rey the rest of his fish. "Calm down, peanut. We'll check it out."

Rey groaned and finished the fish, her mind reeling with the possibilities avocadoes could offer. In fact, by the time she was recounting what few items were in Ben's MREs, she realized Finn and Poe had disappeared. She looked to Ben.

"Where did they go?"

He shrugged and tossed a few twigs onto the fire. "Wanted some alone time, I guess."

She nodded, thinking back to her alone time with Ben. After their… activities at the waterfall, she was keen to resume in the shelter, but immediately recognized how tense and on alert Ben was. She knew it would be wrong (and potentially dangerous) to draw him away from his watch, and instead reveled in just being held in his arms.

But, with the storm gone, and their fires replenished, they had activities that needed to be resumed. She carefully peeled out of his t-shirt, clad in only her black bikini that she was really beginning to resent, and laid the shirt out to dry.

Ben was adding palms to their shelter, as if to make it bigger. She was torn—she longed for more space, but also loved the idea of being smooshed up against his big body. But, her thoughts of their shelter could wait as she strolled over to him, doing her best to wiggle her hips.

"Ben," She purred, stopping beside him, "I said we weren't finished at the waterfall."

He didn't bother to look away from the intricate weaving he was doing along the sticks. "I'm not going back there. God knows what my brother is doing."

She cleared her throat. "We don't need to be over there. Here is fine."

Ben finally glanced over to her and groaned, immediately dropping his gaze to her exposed skin. "Rey, shit. Please. I want to reinforce this in case it starts raining again."

"Yes, and I want to ride your cock now in case it rains again," Rey retorted, crossing her arms to show her irritation, "Why is it that after so long, you still can drive me bloody crazy?"

He grunted and shook his head. "Yeah, likewise, Scavenger." He grabbed another palm and continued his weaving, "Now listen to me. If you let me finish this batch of palms, I'll make you come again. But I'm not fucking you until I'm sure this storm is over and there's not a chance of my brother walking in."

Rey flushed red, not used to such a direct Ben Solo. Or, perhaps it was his promise to give her another earth-shattering orgasm, or even just the promise that yes, he was going to fuck her again. She sighed and dropped to the sand, crossing her arms like a petulant child.

"And when do I get to touch you?" She asked, hypnotized by the way the muscles in his arms tightened as he worked on the shelter, "Because I still haven't gotten a look at the goods, and now I'm starting to wonder if you have some deformity I should know about."

That got Ben to stop. He turned to Rey and narrowed his eyes. "Oh, Scavenger, I promise. There's nothing wrong with my cock. It might be a too big for you, but we made it work once, and we'll make it work again."

She cleared her throat and pursed her lips. "Someone's sure of himself."

Ben smirked and just continued working, only the sound of the ocean breaking through their silence.

-x-x-x-

And he did keep his promise. Ben wasn't sure when Finn and Poe would return, so he insisted on them climbing into the shelter. Rey didn't mind the concern of her best friends walking in—if anything, it made things even sexier.

But Ben was different and loathed the thought of prying eyes. At least, that's why Rey assumed she was sprawled across the palms on the floor of their shelter, her legs pushed open as far as they could go, and Ben Solo's tongue deep inside her.

Despite wanting to lay back and just enjoy the ride, she couldn't help but prop herself up on her elbows, keen to watch his head move eagerly between her legs, and the occasional, smoldering glance he'd offer between licks.

"Fuck, Rey," He grunted, before pressing two deliciously thick fingers inside of her, "You taste so fucking sweet."

She let out a pathetic sounding moan and grabbed onto his hair, desperately trying to rut her cunt against his waiting mouth. "Must be all the fruit," She cried out, her fingers pulling at his dark locks.

He laughed into her thigh and began to suck at her clit, his fat fingers continuing their pace into her. Then, to solidify himself as Ben Solo, Navy SEAL and pussy eater extraordinaire, the guttural moans escaping his mouth every time his tongue and lips ravished another part of her, left her nether regions vibrating.

Rey knew she'd never have a need for a vibrator as long as Ben Solo lived.

It only took another minute of his tongue and his lips and those fingers and—

She wondered if Finn and Poe could hear her cry, despite being deep in the foliage. Her body shook and thrashed, Ben continuing his soft licks, until she finally rested on the palms, completely satiated. She could only moan as he began to kiss a path up her body, starting at her thoroughly pleased cunt and ending at her slightly sun-burned shoulder.

"God, you really are fucking responsive," He muttered, before sliding her back into her bikini bottoms and collapsing beside her.

Rey couldn't help but snort. "Sorry. Before, when we were uh, drunk, I'd never even…"

Ben blinked and sat up. "You were a virgin?"

"No!" She rolled her eyes and sat up as well. "No, of course not. I'd never been eaten out."

He cleared his throat and blushed. "Right, right, sorry. Stupid question. But… Really? Never?"

"Not all guys are into that."

Ben snorted. "I am."

"Yes, I can tell."

He made a show of licking his fingers before laying back down. "I just… Even Snap?"

Just the name of her ex-fiancé made Rey cringe. "Snap? Please. All he was interested in was getting his cock wet, and he lasted oh, I don't know, maybe three minutes on a good day."

Ben cleared his throat and looked away. "Right. I'm sorry about what happened with Snap."

"I'm over it," Rey was quick to respond, distracting herself with the ratty end of her braid, "If anything, everything that happened with him made me stronger."

Beside her, she felt Ben shift, now studying her. "But you loved him, and he hurt you."

She shook her head. "I thought I loved him."

"What do you mean you thought?" Ben sat up, now staring down at her.

Rey sighed and looked away. "I don't know. I thought what I felt for him was love but… I think it was about safety. Security. Feeling wanted."

Ben swallowed. "Oh. Good. I mean. Not good. But… Yeah."

"I mean, when I saw him, I wasn't drawn to him at all." Rey groaned and rubbed at her eyes, reliving the memory, "Paige, Rose's sister, if you remember, knew him through mutual friends. She really thought we'd hit it off and had been trying to set us up together for a while. I was never interested but…"

"But what?" Ben prompted, his dark eyes staring into hers, "What changed?"

Rey cleared her throat and looked away. "I don't know." That wasn't entirely true, but she also wasn't ready to admit certain things to herself, let alone Ben.

"But you must have felt a connection, right? I mean, you guys dated for a while. You agreed to marry him."

She just shrugged. "I thought it was time for me to settle. It felt like all my friends were on the cusp of marriage and… He made he felt wanted. He bought me things and took me places and called me beautiful," She sniffled and shook her head, suddenly embarrassed, "When you're thrown away when you're little because no one wants you, it's easy to fall for the first person who shows interest."

Ben frowned and looked away. "You deserve so much, Rey. Especially more than that piece of shit."

She merely nodded and allowed herself to be pulled into Ben's arms. He was warm, and safe, and familiar, and maybe something she had always needed.

It was as scary of a thought as it was enlightening.

-x-x-x-

Another two days passed, and the four quickly fell into routine. They rose when the sun peaked over the horizon and would quietly feast on whatever fruit they had collected before, usually consisting of mango, bananas, and passion fruit. Then, the men would split up, either to rebuild the fires, collect more wood and fruit, or to fish.

Rey was frustrated that she was still being treated like a fragile little flower, but then wondered if she'd really want to be climbing trees to reach whatever fruit caught her eyes. The cuts and scrapes on Poe's hands and legs were not something she was interested in replicating, especially with her head injury.

There was an unspoken tension as the days passed on the island. Rey thought they had reached a week, but truly wasn't sure. It was a subject that no one wanted to breach, and the concept of being rescued was relegated to their three fires, constantly growing, as well as the freshly written "SOS", always the first thing dear Finn did when he woke up.

From afar, Rey was certain that Finn and Poe were treating the excursion as a honeymoon of sorts, constantly running off to the waterfall, keen to be alone and enjoy each other. While she found it adorable and was thrilled that her best friends were using their crap circumstances to have fun, she also felt herself insanely jealous.

Since her conversation with Ben about Snap, and their second time of messing around, she could feel him pulling away. It was bloody frustrating too—she had barely touched him. He could ravish her body, but she had yet to even see his cock.

She couldn't explain why he was being so… Well, to be quite honest, Ben wasn't really acting abnormal. He was acting how he always did. If anything, their moment of connection was the abnormal part.

But, none of that mattered. She still wanted to be fucked, especially after she insisted they weren't finished when the rain interrupted their activities. Yet, since the last time she had his face between her legs, they instead only spoke of fruit and her head and bloody fish and the little bit of sunburn she had and if—

She was going mad. Was this what was meant by going island crazy? Surely that must be it.

So, come that morning, two days after he gave her a sand-shaking orgasm, Rey knew she wanted more. But gone were her constant thoughts of how massive his cock must be and how she'd do anything to see it.

No.

She wanted a kiss. A sweet, chaste, toe-curling, firework inducing kiss. Rey wanted the type of kiss that fourteen-year-old Rey used to dream of having under the bleachers or against her locker or while spinning in the rain.

At one point in her life, maybe she had even thought her first kiss would be the moody Solo boy, who despite his gruff attitude, always seemed to just be around.

It was a silly thing too, Rey realized, sitting on the sand of a desert island, thinking about her first kiss back in her sophomore year of high school. She only remembered bits of the party, particularly when she watched Kaydel Connix stumble out of Ben's room, looking disheveled and bloody giggling. Even at twenty-eight, she wondered if that evening was Ben's first kiss.

It had been hers, clinging onto Lando, desperate to feel something.

Anything.

She wondered how many times in her life Ben obliterated her expectations, both good and bad. She certainly never thought he'd become a SEAL. She assumed he'd play D1 basketball, at somewhere like Duke, and either play professionally or take over Han's dealerships.

She never thought he'd be a lone wolf, never with a woman on his arm. Ben was attractive and the definition of a jock, both during and after high school, yet he never blew through women.

At one point, she even thought he was going to ask her to senior prom, which of course never panned out. And wouldn't that have been the joke of the year! The same boy who asked her to her very first dance, her freshman Homecoming, also asking her to her final dance…

At seventeen, Rey would have viewed it as the final mockery of her.

At twenty-eight, Rey wondered what could have been.

But this reflection and thoughts of the past was just downright silly. Here she sat, sunburned and in the sand, not knowing if she'd ever return home, and she was busy thinking about the unexpected decisions of Ben Solo over the years.

So, when Ben appeared an hour or so later, arms filled with some exotic fruit she didn't recognize, she decided the past was just that.

The past.

It didn't matter what this boy did or didn't do over the years. All that mattered was what this man was doing now.

And right now, that man was hovering close, cleaning her head wound with expert care.

"It's doing really well," He explained softly, his breath tickling her ears, "You've been so strong, especially with our limited pain medicine."

Rey sniffled, the burn of the vodka still strong, and nodded. "Thank you for taking care of me."

Ben merely nodded and continued to look over the wound. Rey, however, was more distracted by his proximity, warmed by his body surrounding hers. He had settled on his knees, one on either side of her hips, hovering over her like an oversized blanket.

And suddenly, all she cared about were those beautiful, pink lips. Sure, they had grown chapped in the sun, but they called to her, begging to be kissed, begging to finally put away the mystery of his lips on hers and if it would be like the movies and the songs of her teenage years and the promise of fireworks and shivers and, and, and—

She had to know. Before she could stop herself, her eyes had drifted shut, and her body leaned closer to his. With her hands on his chest, she moved her way up his body, one hand moving to cup his cheek. And then, with a shaky breath, she leaned in, ignoring the violent beating of her heart.

But, instead of feeling the press of his lips on hers, her body was pushed backwards, leaving her entire form to fall to the sand. Her eyes shot open, meeting Ben's neurotic gaze. He stood, staring down at her, his mouth agape.

"I'm sorry. I gotta uh. Fish. Rain. Dark coming," He exclaimed, before booking it towards the shoreline.

Rey simply sat up and watched his quick movements, her heart in her throat.

If soft and chaste wasn't going to do it for Ben, then she'd go for plan B.

There was no way he'd push her away in the middle of passionate sex.

Ben Solo was a warm-blooded man, after all.

-x-x-x-

The next day, Rey made a rash decision and took off for the waterfall, claiming she needed a rinse. While that was certainly true—oh, how she'd kill for a hot shower—her plan was simply to get Ben to follow. He was sort of like a puppy these days, never leaving her alone, and only disappearing if he was certain she was in Finn or Poe's care.

With her two best friends still very much in their shelter, Ben did exactly what she expected and stalked after her. But, by the time he caught up, she was already nude, prancing around the cool water with no cares in the world.

"Rey!" Ben barked, standing at the edge of the water, "You can't just run off like that!"

She smirked and swam up to him, making no effort to cover her chest. "And why not? Am I not allowed to bathe with privacy?"

Ben cursed and rubbed at his eyes, his exhaustion evident. "We don't know how dangerous this place is, Rey. You can't take off by yourself."

"You'd hear me scream," She remarked, rather innocently, "and you'd come running."

Her comment made him furious. "Don't even fucking joke about that, Rey. In case you've forgotten, we're on an island in the middle of the fucking Atlantic with no access to medical care. If one of us gets seriously hurt, it's over."

His serious words momentarily knocked the playful grin off her face. But, instead of letting his morbid reminder ruin the interaction, she rose from the water, smirking the moment his eyes dropped to her very wet, very nude form.

"Well, then. We should enjoy the time we have left," She explained, taking a step closer to him, "Live in the moment."

Ben swallowed and took a step back, valiantly trying to look away. "Rey…"

"I said we weren't done, Ben," She reminded him, following his every moment, "And I always mean what I say."

Whatever ridiculous, likely chivalrous rebuttal Ben prepared to throw back died promptly in his throat as Rey dropped before him, letting her knees hit the lush grass of the island paradise. With expert hands, she brought his shorts to the ground, and finally, just finally, Rey got a look at what Ben was packing.

Despite his cock still rising to attention at the sight of her nude form, Rey was still knocked speechless for a brief moment. It was exactly how she imagined—pale, thick, long, and angry.

Sort of like Ben.

Well, she could have spent forever admiring his appendage, but she had other things in mind. Within moments she had as much as she could fit inside her waiting mouth, moaning the minute the heated flesh met her anxious tongue.

And so Ben stood there, mouth agape and eyes wide, watching as Rey twisted and whined and moaned and sucked the life out of him through his cock. Her hands worked furiously at whatever her mouth couldn't reach, and by the time his hands had traveled to her hair, one of her hands had dropped between her legs.

Of course, the sight of her pleasuring herself was too much for Ben to take, and he quickly lifted her into his arms, moaning at the way his cock jerked out from between her lips. He set her on a large rock and slipped between her open legs, letting his engorged length tease her swollen lips.

"Fuck, Ben, please," Rey cried out, jerking her legs to tighten around his bare hips, "God, just fuck me finally!"

With her words, he needed no further prompting, and quickly sheathed himself inside of her. He let out a lewd moan, his head dropping to her shoulder, unable to handle just how warm and wet she felt around him.

"Rey," He grumbled, his lips pressing soft kisses down her shoulder and chest, "You feel like fucking paradise."

She wrapped her arms around his neck and let her fingers run into his hair, immediately pulling at the dark locks. "Fuck me, Ben! Now!"

As his hips began to move, sharp thrusts in and out of her shaking form, his mouth focused on one of her nipples. His tongue immediately began to prod at the erect pink, licking and circling it eagerly. Within moments, he had his hot mouth wrapped around it, sucking eagerly.

Rey couldn't help but grasp onto his large shoulders, squealing at every thrust of his hips. Even against the roaring sounds of the waterfall, the smack of his hips was an erotic melody to her ears, and only intensified her moans and cries.

Ben soon abandoned her chest and moved to her neck, his lips and tongue nipping at the smooth skin hidden above her shoulder. The harder he sucked, the harder he fucked her, and the louder she screamed.

"I can't—oh god, Ben—" She sobbed out, her fingers now pulling brutally at his hair, "Please!"

She felt his massive arms move, one to wrap around her lower back, the other to cup behind her head. His hips sped up, that massive cock of his hitting somewhere she didn't really believe existed, as his fingers tightened in her own hair.

And with his hand grasping her head, his own face moving forward, she was certain that not only would this fuck give her probably the best orgasm of her life, but also the kiss she had been begging for. But, as his thrusts began to waiver, indicating his own pending release, her face was pushed into his chest as he held her close.

"Oh, shit, Rey—" He cried out, his other hand peaking around her stomach to land between her legs, "God, you're so fucking soft—"

Apparently, all she needed was the feeling of his fingers on her clit, because in moments she was shaking, crying out as the strongest orgasm of her life ripped through her body. She knew how desperately close he was, especially since the moment her walls tightened around his length, he let out a lewd groan that would live forever in her fantasies.

All she could do was moan and shake as he reached his own peak. She pressed soft kisses to his massive chest as he shook, only stopping her movements as she felt him move, her limp body still in his arms.

"What—where—" Was all she managed, her brain melted after the fuck of a lifetime.

He merely chuckled, a deliciously deep noise, and led them into the cool water beside the waterfall. He helped her wrap her arms and legs around him, before leaning backwards to dunk his own head.

"I figured a good soak was in order," He explained, his voice softer than expected, "You know, to clean up."

She couldn't help but flush at his words, knowing he referred to the mix of liquid she had dripping between her thighs. That, combined with sweat and whatever weird island rock residue she had on her back, was enough reason to slip into the water.

And so, Rey let herself rest in his arms, never once complaining as he gently rinsed her with water, his hands soft and smooth on every inch of her body. When they finished, he helped her dress, and without asking, hoisted her back up.

When he tucked her back into their shelter, insisting she take a nap, she could only nod at his orders. She watched the muscles in his back ripple as he wandered to the shoreline, ready to catch fish for dinner.

Here he was, fucking her and then catching her dinner.

Suddenly, she had wet, hot, tears dripping down her face, unable to understand his actions, or her feelings, or why she was still crying over Ben Solo after all these years.

Because she had cried many times over that stupid boy.

But he was no longer a boy.

He proved that to her only moments ago.

Ben was a man.

But he wasn't hers.

-x-x-x-

Later that evening, Rey sat huddled around the fire, her belly legitimately full for the first time since she left Miami. Ben had an excellent afternoon fishing, and along with some avocados that he had surprised her with, Rey had stuffed her face. Of course, after being fucked by the waterfall, she needed the extra energy.

But once everyone had finished eating, Ben had taken Finn to help rebuild their other two fires, leaving Rey to sit with Poe. Despite his sunburn and exhaustion, he looked relatively happy, which was an upgrade from his first few days there of blaming himself for the entire fiasco.

"You have a good time at the waterfall with Ben?" Poe asked, a knowing glint in his eyes, "You two were gone for a while."

Rey considered playing coy, but ultimately decided against it. "Well, sometimes you have to earn good orgasms," She retorted, her lips twisting into a smirk.

He merely laughed. "Good. I'm glad you two have uh…" He paused, clearly at a loss for words, "Well, at least decided to work out your sexual tension."

She nodded, knowing Poe was right. For her entire life, she had battled with feelings of wanting to ruin Ben Solo while also kissing his stupid, plump lips. She wanted to watch him scream and cry but also whisper sweet nothings into her ear.

Rey rarely knew what she wanted with him, always at odds with herself. Except for right then and there, when she finally knew what she wanted from Ben.

"Poe, can I ask you something?" She asked, her voice soft against the waves of the ocean.

He smiled and nodded. "Of course, Rey. What's up?"

She bit her lip and glanced back to the other two fires, confirming that Finn and Ben were still working. Once satisfied, she looked to Poe. "It's about Ben. We've uh… We've now slept together twice."

"Go on…" Poe couldn't help but laugh.

She sighed. "Well, and he's also uh…" She made a lewd gesture with her tongue, one that had Poe rolling his eyes, "Twice. And of course, we sleep together every night. He never tries to pretend he doesn't want to hold me close."

Poe yawned and nodded. "Okay? So, what's the question? Are you asking me if I think you two are a thing now?"

She quickly shook her head. "No, no. It's not that. It's um. He won't kiss me." At the way Poe's eyebrows shot up, she cleared her throat and continued, "Yes, I know, it sounds insane that we've had sex twice and have never kissed but we haven't. I even tried to kiss him a few days ago and he bolted away from me like I'd burned him."

At that moment, despite Ben and Poe sharing no blood between them, she could immediately recognize the familial resemblance. Poe's face scrunched up the same way that Ben's did whenever confused. It was the same look Ben had given her throughout high school, right before any of their rather intense arguments.

But Poe simply shook his head. "You're positive? You two have never kissed?" When Rey shook her head, he continued, "Any type? Not even a peck?"

She sighed and looked out towards the water. "Nothing. His mouth has explored every inch of my body aside from my bloody lips." She wanted to be irritated, and confused, and still hate Ben Solo, but she had an aura of calm around her, given the beautiful sights of the ocean and the glorious fuck she had earlier.

"But… That doesn't make any sense. You and Ben have kissed before."

The moment the words escaped Poe's lips, her eyes darted back to the man beside her, her enjoyment of the environment gone. "Sorry, what?"

She watched, even in the moonlight, as the blood drained from Poe's face. He cleared his throat. "Fuck. I wasn't supposed to say anything."

"POE!" She nearly growled, inching closer to him, "How could we have kissed if we don't remember?"

He sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "Uh, it was last Christmas. At my party? You were so drunk. Ben was really drunk too." He looked away, considering his words, "I didn't see everything. But what I did see was you two eating each other's faces."

His words paralyzed her. For years, she wondered about sharing a kiss with Ben Solo, and now, months after it occurred, she discovered that she had. And what a kicker it was that every first she had with that man—kiss, night in bed—was while inebriated.

"You didn't remember and since you were with Snap, I didn't think it was my place to tell you," Poe explained, nibbling on his lip nervously, "I'm sorry."

Rey looked back towards the water, unsure of what she was supposed to do with this new information. She could cry, or scream, or kick Poe, or—

A thought occurred to her.

"Poe, tell me honestly. Does Ben remember?"

She glanced at Poe, meeting his chocolate gaze. He merely nodded.

"He thinks he hurt you. Or some other macho man bullshit. Like he was touching someone else's goods. Betraying your trust. I don't think—"

His words were cut off by the reappearance of Ben and Finn. Finn smiled at his fiancé. "Let's go to bed, Poe."

Poe nodded again and jumped up. He looked between Rey and Ben, before following Finn away.

Rey, on the other hand, remained seated, staring at the water. It was only at the sound of Ben's voice that she looked to him.

"Should we go to bed?" He asked, his deep voice tickling her insides.

She merely nodded and let him pick her up, holding on tightly as they crossed the sand. As she leaned her face against his shoulder, enjoying the warmth of his skin and the breeze of the night air, she let her eyes close.

How much longer could she do this? Her entire relationship with Ben had been a series of miscommunications and she was just so bloody tired.

That night, as he held her close, she dreamt of ugly Christmas jumpers and the taste of Hot Toddies on her tongue, and the moody scowl of a Navy SEAL on Poe's favorite armchair.

-x-x-x-

December 2017

Denver, Colorado

Yavin Gated Residences

Ben sat in the corner of Poe and Finn's living room, halfway through his third drink of the evening: straight whiskey. His first two had been some fancy Christmas cocktail that Finn had drawn up, but after his second, he really needed something to take the edge off.

He hated the loud Christmas music. He hated the elegant decorations covering every inch of his brother's home. He hated the perfect dishes they prepared. He hated the laughter of their guests. He hated the fun everyone was having.

But, most of all, he hated him.

His stupid styled hair, his stupid Princeton education, his stupid foreign car, his stupid second home in Aspen, his stupid fucking name… His stupid fucking everything.

Ben couldn't help but recall their meeting in May, when the intruder was introduced as Rey's boyfriend of five months. The prospect seemed ridiculous. The Scavenger hadn't held a boyfriend for longer than a month in all the time Ben had known her.

She was always free.

So, he was surprised when he returned to Denver a few days ago, ready to enjoy a free week and the holiday with his family.

The last thing he had expected to see was a ring on her finger.

And maybe it was the alcohol in his system, or things he had tried to bury deep, feelings he had tried to hide from the surface since he was eighteen years young. But watching her smile, watching her laugh, watching her hold his hand, her head thrown back, her red lips parted in delight…

He felt sick. Physically sick.

He finished his drink and stumbled to the bar, quick to pour himself another glass. With any luck he'd get piss drunk. Maybe finally return Finn's co-workers flirting.

"Might wanna take it easy, pal," His brother announced, rounding behind himself, dressed in a ridiculous Christmas sweater, featuring Santa in a rather X-rated position, "You don't want to waste one of your days recovering from a hangover."

Ben just shrugged and tossed the drink back, enjoying the momentary burn of liquor against his throat. "Go enjoy your party. Looks like Finn is cutting into that fancy torte thing."

Poe frowned and studied his brother. "You good? You don't look like you're enjoying yourself." He bit his lip and rubbed Ben's shoulder, "I know parties aren't exactly your thing, but you should have fun. Hang loose."

"Thanks. I'll try." Ben took another gulp and walked away, returning to his seat in the corner of the room.

And, unfortunately, people tried to chat him up. A few friends from high school. Some of Finn's co-workers. Some stragglers like himself. But he paid them little notice. He was too busy studying the petite brunette by the fireplace, entranced by her smiling features and cute, Christmas sweater.

She was busy giggling with an Asian girl he recognized as one of her college friends, holding a present between her hands. The diamond ring on her finger sparkled in the firelight, the silver band taunting his drunken gaze.

By the time her fiancé reappeared by her side, he had found himself on drink number five.

-x-x-x-

For reasons unbeknownst to Poe, he had developed the so-called "clown" role in every one of the friend groups he had been a part of in his short twenty-seven years of life. Sure, he was laid back, and funny, and took life one step at a time, but he didn't appreciate the implication that followed.

That he was stupid, namely.

Because he was far from it. And watching his brother stew in the corner of the room for most of the evening certainly didn't require rocket science to determine the root of his bad behavior.

He rarely saw Ben drunk. Frankly, he was more concerned with Rey, who had drunk probably her body weight in Hot Toddies. The party, which had been a roaring success, was winding down, with most of their guests safely taken home with their DDs or in an uber. But, of course, Rey stayed behind, prancing around their living room in a headband with elf ears.

Snap had disappeared to help Finn in the kitchen, leaving Poe to watch his drunken best friend dance merrily to the music and his brother to stew in the corner.

But he had only turned for a second, only moved to collect discarded plates of cherry torte and pumpkin pie when he heard the soft, feminine gasp.

Poe whipped around, his eyes widening in surprise at the sight in front of him. Standing before him, under the expertly placed mistletoe by their powder room, were Rey and Ben, locked in a kiss. His brother was holding the woman tight to his body, one enormous hand grasping her cheek, the other steadying her back. Rey, who seemed to be in a state of shock, had her hands by her side, although clearly cautiously returning the kiss.

And so, Poe watched the two embrace, studying the way his brother practically devoured the woman, his lips moving ravenously against her red mouth, his tongue thrashing against hers. Rey's arms eventually slid up his chest, moving to wrap around his neck, her hand grasping a handful of his short, black hair.

Poe was still too shocked to do much more than stare, until he heard the incoming voice of his boyfriend and Snap. He rushed over to the two, grabbing his brother by the collar of his shirt, ripping him away from Rey.

"Ben!" He hissed out, shoving him backwards, "She's engaged!" He found himself sputtering out, looking frantically between the two.

Ben swallowed and glanced at Rey, who in a drunken daze, stepped back, her mouth still parted. He let out a shaky breath. "I—the mistletoe—"

His words were interrupted as Finn and Snap strolled in, huddled together and singing along to 'Last Christmas' which blasted through their speakers. Snap grinned at the trio and wrapped his arm around Rey.

"Let's head out, babe." He kissed Rey's head and smiled at the other three men, "Awesome party, you guys! Just wait till my New Year's Extravaganza!"

And then Snap disappeared, tugging Rey behind, her eyes glossy, her red lips swollen.

Finn continued humming along to the music, unaware of the staring contest occurring between his boyfriend and Ben.

Poe frowned. "Ben…"

The taller man shook his head. His voice was gruff.

"Don't."

And then he strolled up the stairs, ready to pretend the night never occurred.

-x-x-x-

December 2017

Denver, Colorado

Saber Diner

The following day, Poe sat with Rey at a local diner, watching as the tired girl shoved a forkful of pancakes in her mouth. He cleared his throat and sipped his coffee.

"So… How's your hangover treating you?" He asked hesitantly.

She groaned and swallowed her mouthful. "It's bloody awful! I'm jealous Snap didn't drink. I should have done that cleanse he's on."

Poe just nodded, wondering if Finn had fallen into the toilet. He rubbed at his eyes, unsure of how to bring up the previous evening's finale. "So… About last night…."

Rey sipped her coffee and laughed. "Gods, last night! I'm so embarrassed." She ate another forkful and groaned, "Truthfully, I don't remember anything after White Elephant! I had a slice of cherry torte, got that tea pot, and the rest is dark."

Poe blinked. "Wait… You mean you don't remember…?"

She made a face. "Remember what? What did I do?"

He rubbed at his eyes and shook his head. He forced a smile at her. "You just got into a singing contest with one of Finn's co-workers, that's all."

She groaned. "Gods, I hope that isn't on tape."

Poe glanced at his coffee and sighed.

Somehow, he didn't think the memory would be so murky for his brother.