Chapter nine. The truth and other lies.
On Wednesday afternoon, Jude was devastated to find that Tommy had called in to take the day off. She hardly found it fair of him to hide from a confrontation with her. Yesterday, she had been sorry and saddened by the way the day had unfolded, but today, she was only sad, not sorry any longer. She had merely stated her opinion and after all that he had made her do for him, she felt more than allowed to do it. He might have had a point in calling her out for judging him too quickly, but in the end, he had made her feel horrible for simply pointing out stuffing compliment after compliment down his wife's throat was neither fair to her, nor him, for they both earned better.
And that, she genuinely believed!
She was just about to call Tommy, demanding an explanation for his absence, when the door opened. The guy entered just didn't turn out to be the one she was dying to see. "Shay?" Jude placed the phone away. "I thought you left city already. You weren't at the hotel Sunday morning and Tommy said that you blew off your recording session with him that afternoon."
He entered and closed the door. "After Saturday, I needed some time to think." Unasked, he sat down across from her, faintly smiling, though she'd say it carried a whiff of sadness along. "After seeing you with Quincy I felt…defeated."
"How so?" Jude asked as she sat back, eying him warily.
He snorted. "Another second alone and the two of you would have been all over each other. You never looked at me that way when you and I used to date," he remarked unhappily.
"I was fifteen when we dated."
"You know what I'm talking about, then."
Jude blushed. Was it really that obvious?
With a low hanging head, he nodded. "It's okay. It's not like I'm in love with you or anything, but I admit I was attracted to you and finding out that Quincy is who you want was a little bit…crushing. But still, I like you, and after how badly I treated you, I figured I owe you something."
Still confused what he actually wanted from her, Jude dipped her head an inch forward and frowned. "Well…?"
"I'm giving you free advice," he said. Jude rolled her eyes. Shay then rolled his. "I know him longer than you do. No doubt, his marriage won't last. Especially not with you in the mix! He's attracted to you and I'd bet a Grammy he's already thinking about ways to lure you into his bed. Stay clear of him if you don't want another broken heart. You think I did badly when we split up? You haven't seen the shattered hearts left behind in his wage! He's ruthless. The wet spots on the sheets have yet to dry while he's already out looking for the next one."
As Shay continued his ramble about the evil Tom Quincy and his reckless actions, Jude realized something she hadn't yet understood: She was probably the only person in the entire world that actually believed Tommy could make his marriage work. That had been what she had tried telling him yesterday. And how had it come across?
Like yet another dagger shot at him!
No wonder he had bitten back. She'd shown her teeth too, had she been in his place. Nobody but her believed in him and that itself was the weirdest thing, for she also knew there was some odd attraction between them that just wouldn't die down, plus some minor unaddressed feelings on her side. But, she wasn't the type of girl that would ever sleep with a married man. She had thought about Laura's words. Given the situation, she would walk away from Tommy! And it was out of question Tommy would divorce anytime soon.
She needed to speak with Tommy right away!
"I'm sorry, Shay. Thanks for trying to picture Tommy as the ultimate evil, but it failed. See yourself out! By the way, thanks for talking to Laura about me and Tommy. Great friendship you and I have there!" Walking out, she surely wouldn't wait for him to be gone.
xxxxxx
He was getting bored. Seriously so! Amazon had not yet shipped his books, the one he had he had finished, all paper work was done, all personal mail had been responded to, he had even gone as far and placed the occasional, twice a year-courtesy call to his mother and that hadn't been fun! It was interesting how much one person could accomplish in one and a half days if ready to do anything only to keep himself from thinking about a certain snotty assistant.
He'd have had endless sex, but Laura had left for a photo-shoot in London yesterday morning, so he was alone at home. Monogamy sucked.
Maybe he should clean the windows… It couldn't be that hard, could it? The cleaning lady always cleaned all the windows in only one morning and she was a tiny woman over fifty! Surely, he'd be faster than her! He could even make it a personal challenge and try cleaning all windows in less than an hour!
God, how desperate had become…
The doorbell rang. He hurried towards the door. Maybe it was Kwest, suggesting a guy's night out. Who cared that it was barely four pm. They could head out right now! Tommy opened the door. No Kwest. "Jude."
She gave a sheepish smile. "Hey. Can I come in, or is it a bad time?"
Well, it was either Jude or windows. "Come inside." He closed the door after her. "Came by to call me a bad husband some more?"
"Not really," she told him, slyly adding, "though, at times, you are!" He was just about to get angry again, when she held up her hand to stop him. "I've come in peace. And, to apologize! You're making an effort in being a better husband and I called you lame and it must have sounded that I doubted you even could be better. It wasn't what I had tried to say."
"What did you try telling me?" He wasn't sure he wanted to know. Her words had stung pretty badly the last time she had evaluated him.
"I believe in you. I think you can be an extraordinary good husband. That's why I was so confused about the books. You don't need them. I do think you should try the honesty-thing, but you don't have to let her in on all the details of the past – especially not a certain Saturday night," Jude murmured with rosy cheeks. "But…I've read the book, too! Those things that Rodrigo tells Evangeline are stupid and over the top and not at all what a woman wants to hear. At least, I wouldn't want to hear them. If I were Laura, I'd – She's not here, is she?"
With a chuckle, Tommy shook his head.
Jude timidly smiled. "If I were your wife, I'd want to hear how you're struggling to make this marriage work. That'd tell me you're genuinely trying! I know people who honestly love each other and they just let their relationship fall apart because they don't work on it. You don't love her, or aren't in love with her yet – whatever – but you're putting up a fight to make her happy, anyway. You went to that awesome restaurant with her, even though I know you hate those public places. You put up with her parents. You pretend you like her food. That should mean something! And if that doesn't mean anything to her, but she only cares about those ridiculously over-the-top compliments, then something is wrong with her and not you! But I know that Laura isn't that person. And I do think you two stand a chance."
Stunned by her arguments, Tommy was out of words for a moment. She was quite a unique girl, he found. And, she was possibly the first person since his wedding that actually thought he had the potential of being a good husband. With a smile, he met her eyes. "Thank you for coming here and telling me. I'm sorry, too. I blew up on you yesterday. I think I was still reeling on something Kwest said and…never mind. You do have a right to tell me your opinion. I need you to be honest with me, cause there aren't many people who are."
"Don't worry," Jude quipped. "I never hold back!"
"I've noticed that much," he said with a laugh.
xxxxxx
Somehow they had wound up on the couch, watching a movie. They were hardly paying attention to it; however, Jude had brought up the infamous book at one point and now, both were having a vivid discussion over some of the rather outrageous scenes.
"Seriously," Jude professed, holding up both a hand as if to swear on something, "if a guy told me he'd rather kiss me for the next then years, than make love to me for the next five, I'd be really hurt. I want a guy that finds my irresistible. He shouldn't be able to keep his hands off me! Every morning when he wakes up, his first thing to do would be to wake me with…" A ferocious blush hit her face when it dawned on her what she had just said.
Tommy grinned. "Do continue! Wake you with what?"
She slapped his shoulder, still blushing. "You know what I mean! I don't want a guy who can go without touching me for ten years! That'd be boring!"
He could only relate. And he could imagine it just as well! Jude, in his bed, naked, snuggled deeply into the sheets. He'd lay behind her, aroused, rubbing…he seriously needed to change the topic! "More pizza?"
Surprised, but always hungry, Jude handed him her plate. "I can't believe they only take ten minutes to deliver to you! I have to wait over an hour when we order!"
With a laugh he let her in on his secret. "I give him fifty bucks extra for ignoring every order that came in before mine."
She tossed a couch cushion at him. "You're the reason I always have to wait for my pizza? How could you?" Jude was appalled. "Delivery service is a sacred institution. One does not bribe them! There's a natural order one has to respect and when I call at four and you at four'o'five, then I have a right to get my pizza first!"
"You're just jealous you can't afford a fifty-dollar tip!"
"Hell yes I am!" Both laughed.
Tommy returned with the Pizza, sat down again, and while Jude watched what was happening on the TV screen, he found himself oddly captured by her. When had he ever watched TV with Laura, eating pizza, simply having fun? Never, was the devastating answer. With Jude, he often felt more at ease. She wasn't expecting anything from him, which made it easier for him to just let go and be himself.
"You're staring at me," Jude pointed out, her voice lowered, unwilling to meet his eyes as she concentrated on her feet on the ground.
Tommy looked away. "Sorry. I was…just lost in thought, I guess."
Finished with her slice of pizza, Jude placed the plate away and stood up. "I think I should go now."
"Because I looked at you," Tommy asked in confusion. For some reason he didn't want her to leave. "I promise not to do it again," he assured, albeit he was looking at her just then, hoping she'd sit down again. "The movie hasn't even ended yet."
"Like we were paying attention anyway," Jude remarked. On her feet, but not moving, she wasn't sure what she was waiting for. Leaving now wasn't what she wanted, but at the same time she knew that every other minute she'd stay would only be a danger. Damn his wife, damn her question about being alone in a room with Tommy. This morning she had been so sure that she could deal with that but here she was, running away, because she knew she couldn't. Damn it! What if they caught each other's eyes again in that way they had last Saturday? A similar expression, she believed, she had already seen a moment ago on Tommy's face. "I don't think it'd be smart if I stayed."
Now he stood up, finding himself startlingly close to her. There had been a million arguments he was prepared to deliver to make her stay, none of them appropriate to come from a married man, but the second their eyes locked, his mind went blank. A soft scent of vanilla evaporated from her and he found he loved that smell. As he gazed at her, delving deep into the sparkling blue of her eyes that were alternating between innocence and longing, he felt the soft puffs of her respiration hitting his skin ever so fleetingly.
Jude had been right. This wasn't smart. But did he care? Hardly.
A frisson of sexual awareness rushed through his body and it itched in his fingers to touch her. He had forgotten he was married. Hell, if he'd been in the middle of a room full of paparazzi, he'd not have noticed them, either! "Jude…"
"I have to go!" Then she ran out.
xxxxxx
They pretended the moment never happened.
Again.
Jude sat behind Tommy's PC, checking the latest RSVPs for his upcoming birthday while he was flipping through a catalogue, highlighting several items Jude was supposed to suggest to everyone who didn't know what to get as a present.
"This is so wrong," she complained. "You have everything and still get more, while I have nothing and have to limit my wish-lists to ten items or less."
"Live ain't fair," Tommy quipped, circling a picture of a motorcycle helmet. "What did you get for your birthday?"
She winced upon remembering. "Two weeks of College Application Prep Classes from my mother and a Beatles Album from my Dad. I wanted neither."
"That sucks," he agreed. He spotted a leather-bound guitar case in the catalogue and circled it.
"Um…did you invite Portia?" Her eyes fixed on the screen.
"Portia as in my ex-wife? Why would I invite her to my birthday?"
"I don't know, but she sent an email assuring you she'll be there. That's not good."
Placing the catalogue away, he looked at Jude, his expression skeptical. "I know that's not good. How come you know that's not good? Do you know her? You know, from your time as Shay's girlfriend?"
Avoiding meeting Tommy's eyes, Jude gave a small nod. "We've met before. On occasion…"
"You don't seem happy," he observed immediately. Portia was a nice woman, not towards him, but to most other people, so naturally Jude's reaction surprised him.
"Like I said, we've met on occasion and…she's one of a kind. A very determinded kind."
"Portia?" He scoffed. Determination wasn't a word he'd connect his ex-wife with. Conniving, maybe. Selfish. Cold. Then again, only when it came to him!
Jude wasn't willing to explain in all detail how she'd come to despise that woman, or what part she played in her giving up music as her life's goal. "Long story. You want me to un-invite her?"
"I beg you to!"
xxxxxx
"Hey Kwest!" Jude caught up with him in the parking lot. "Remember that bet about how long Tommy's marriage would last?"
"The one where you and I picked next week?"
"Yep." She blushed, guilty and a tad bit ashamed. "I kind of want out."
"New inside info?"
With a uncomfortable face she shook her head. "Tommy and I have become friends. I told him I believe in him and his efforts to make this thing work. And so far he's doing really well! It wouldn't be fair if I bet against him behind his back."
"Hm."
She frowned. "What's that supposed to mean. Hm-what?"
"Nothing. Just…you two…it seems odd you'd help him save his marriage."
Sensing an accusation, she scowled. "How's that?"
"Nothing. Just a stray observation."
"What did you observe exactly?" Crossing her arms, this whole moment was becoming gradually upsetting, although she couldn't quite explain why. She felt judged by him. He placed her into a certain category she hardly liked. "Are you trying to tell me there's something going on between Quincy and me? Cause there isn't!"
"I like you, Jude. And I know you two don't sleep together. No offence! But something is going on and I think you know. You just don't want to admit it. So take this as an advice: He won't change for you. Even if he'll divorce for you, then you're just the next girl in a long line of women he feels drawn to. You're nothing special to him, just a good-looking, interesting female that sparked his interest. Right now you're somehow out of reach and that makes him want you. But the second he had you, that fascination, all that what's making him seem so attracted and intrigued by you, will be gone and all that will remain is a man incapable of fidelity."
"One friend you are," she sneered. "Does he know how little faith his best friend has in him? Betting against his marriage was bad. We shouldn't have done it in the first place. But I hardly knew him then while you're his best friend!" Being called naïve and a cheater-to-be, more or less, made her angry and it showed.
"He knows what he can and can't do. And didn't you tell me he expects you to cover for him once he cheats?"
"He asked me to do my job. I will do that. Can you say the same thing about being his friend?"
"As a friend, I don't fool myself about him. He is who he is!"
"And who would that be?" Tommy asked, walking up behind him. His voice carried disappointment, indicating he'd been listening for a while.
Kwest sighed heavily. "The day was long. Let's just talk tomorrow."
"Don't bother."
"T, we're friends. We always spoke our minds."
"Maybe we should stop doing that." He tossed a pair of keys at Jude. "You forgot those inside. See you tomorrow."
"Quincy…" She called after him, strangely uncomfortable leaving him now.
But he only shook his head. "Tomorrow, Jude." Then he walked back inside.
xxxxxxx
"This is ridiculous!" Shay kicked his uncle's office door shut before storming up to Big D's desk. He leaned across it, angrily. "I will not speak on behalf on Tom Quincy. This is my life, D. If Quincy cheats, let the world know the truth. No matter how fake my words are, nobody will believe I mean it, anyway."
"I'm trying to let the world know the truth," Darius replied with firmness. "Tom wants to make this marriage work. He needs good headlines and it won't kill you if you mention on one or two occasions that he's a dedicated Producer whom you've witnessed being extraordinarily kind to his wife."
"Why are you so damn eager to fix his screwed up life, huh?"
Darius gave a snide smile. "To stay in shape. It's only a matter of time 'til I have to save your ass again. You're as dumb as he is when it comes to living with the public eye upon you. You do as you please until some stupid decision backfires. I'm stuck dealing with it, but instead of a 'thank you' all I get are complaints and ungrateful snarls. I'm getting tired of that, Shay. I'm getting tired of spending my day selling you two idiots as everybody's darlings! Here is some fact for you: You made your bed – now live in it. Meaning, you work for me and do as I say. You wanted me to make you famous, guess what: It comes with a price!"
"You really want me to tell that crap to the press?"
"Exactly. And there's one more thing." Darius pulled open one of this desk drawers and drew out an envelope. Shay eyed it with intrigue. The second he found out about its content, however, he wished for it to just disappear. "It came this morning. Along with a note. Apparently, there's some photographer out there who's looking out for you."
"I can explain," Shay tried, but Darius shushed him.
"Coke? In a public club in New York no less?" He laughed bitterly. "You have some balls marching in here, rambling about Tommy's screwed up life. This could be the end of your not-so-stellar-anymore career. Ever thought about that?"
"I'm not a freaking junkie! It was a party, it was offered to me, I had a bad couple of days and was pretty wasted already. It was a mistake, one that happened only once."
"I want you to ask Jude out. And make sure she says 'yes'."
Shay was shocked. "How did we go from drugged me to Jude?"
Darius reached into his drawer once more, pulling out a tabloid that featured a picture of Shay and Jude emerging a restaurant. It was the night they had ran into Tom and his wife, Shay immediately realized. He hadn't seen the paparazzi, which hadn't meant there weren't any. His uncle pointed to the headline.
"[i]'Shay Mills and Girl in Red. Spotted last week, Shay and former girlfriend Jude Harrison were seen leaving the restaurant after what seemed to be a fancy night out. Maybe a return to his beginnings will bring back some fans. The Rapper, who rose to fame with the 2004 hit single 'S to the H to the A to the Y' hasn't had a Top Ten single in 18 months, but continues to make headlines by getting arrested and collecting DUIs.'"
Taking a long look at his nephew, Darius closed his drawer before standing up. "Jude is good publicity and you need good publicity."
"She hates me for what I did to her. For what we did to her."
"Then fix it. You remember how to sugarcoat women, don't you?"
"You want me to lie to her?"
"I want you to date her. I don't care how, or what it takes."
"I could buy her every damn diamond there is and she wouldn't take me back, much less agree to this farce."
Big D gave a nonchalant scoff. "Beg, then. Pay her. Do whatever it takes."
"She's not a whore! Did it ever occur to you that her upstanding character is what makes her so different from everybody else? It's what makes her Good Publicity!"
"Haven't you learned that nobody is different when it comes to money? Find out what she needs and give it to her."
Shay stood up, but instead of facing off his uncle, he merely walked out on him.
Darius took another glance at the envelope containing Shay's drug escapade. He frowned, wondering why some photographer would rather help Shay than cash this snapshot in. Its worth was well above the Ten Grand Scale. With a sigh he realized that this was yet another thing he had to invest time in. Nobody was selfless in his biz. So, what was the master plan behind this?
xxxxxx
'Why does he have to smell so damned good?' Jude fretted, inwardly, as she stretched her neck to its limit, trying to avoid touching his shoulder with her nose. He was looking something up in his PC and instead of just letting her make room for him, he leaned across the desk, right in front of her, letting his intoxicating smell fill her nostrils. She wondered whether he could smell her, too, and if he could, did he like her perfume?
'Bad Jude!' she chastised herself. 'He's married. Bad Jude! Bad!'
"Where's my file, Jude? The one that used to be on the desktop, called 'Very Important Numbers'?" Instead of leaning back, he turned his head, his face mere inches away from hers.
She stretched her neck even further, fighting for every inch of space between them. "The one that listed about a hundred phone numbers from girls of whom most have garnered a very disputable reputation in the public view?"
He nodded.
"Deleted."
With a heavy sigh he straightened up, giving Jude room to breathe. "I have worked my ass off to collect those numbers!"
"Oh I'm sure there was a lot of naked ass involved in collecting those numbers. I'd hardly call it work, though." Now, with her senses back under control, she scowled at him. "Why'd you need it? What woman could you possibly want to call, and why?"
"Because I just found out that Laura invited a friend of hers to my Party tonight and…I kind of…once… Look, Laura doesn't know and I'd like to keep it that way. I'm trying to find her number so I can call her and make sure of that! But you deleted that whole damn file," he grumbled, "which means I can't call her!"
"Doesn't Laura have her number?"
"Yes, Jude." Tommy rolled his eyes. "My next move would be to ask my wife for the number of a woman I had sex with."
With a blush, Jude smiled. "Oh."
"Exactly. Never mind, her name is Ashley Gibbs. Since you'll be working the door tonight, just make sure to inform her to keep my past with her a secret."
"About that…um…I was wondering if I could get off tonight…?"
"Obviously not." Irritation spread on his face. "You don't want to come to my party?"
"It's not like I'm a guest, Quincy. You just told me to work the door. Your wife doesn't want me there as a guest, your friends and I hardly have anything to talk about,
Darius considers me an intruder in this world and Shay will doubtlessly try to hit on me again."
"Didn't you tell him you guys were done?"
"Yes I did. For some reason he refuses to listen. And besides, there's this kind of really important thing that I have to do tonight…"
He glared at her. "Gossip Girl is not that important, Jude!"
"It is to me," She retorted. "But seriously, I would just end up standing at the bar, waiting for the night to end. Please, Quincy. I make sure to find that Ashley-chick's number and tell her to keep quiet about you. In return, I can stay away? Pretty please?"
"Fine." Not putting up a fight, he accepted her suggestion. Nonetheless he was a bit sad she refused to come. Albeit understanding her reasons, he was sure she could have fun if she just wanted to.
She smiled gratefully. "I'll make it up to you. I promise."
"Okay. Just…nothing. Okay."
He gave a last smile before leaving the office. Jude sunk deeper into the chair as she buried her face into her hands in shame. Truth was, she wanted to go. She had looked forward to going, to meeting a lot of business people and celebrities. But no, her mother had to ruin yet another thing for her.
Picking up her cell, Jude dialed Sadie's number. "Hey, I cancelled tonight. Are you sure this will work?"
"It has to," Sadie told with a lack of confidence as Jude found. "Either that, or we'll loose the house…"
xxxxxxx
In one hand, Tommy held a glass of Champagne while the other one rested loosely on Laura's hip. In her blue sequined short dress, she looked more than just beautiful, he found, and pressed a soft kiss on her temple. "Great Party, isn't it?"
Laura smiled back, for a moment even allowing herself to acknowledge his assistant's talent for organizing. "Jude did a good job. I have to admit that."
He grinned. "Somehow I doubt you'll tell her again in person."
Her eyes turned a darker shade. "I know she's a big help for you. And as long as she keeps her hands away from you, I will try and accept her role in your life."
"That's all I'm asking for." Placing away the Champagne, he smiled dashingly at his wife. "Dance with me?"
"I'd love to."
"Wouldn't we all love to dance with him?"
Both Laura and Tommy turned around, the latter being the most surprised by the woman standing there. "I personally ordered to un-invite you, Portia."
"Yeah, I got that mail. I personally chose to ignore it," she mocked him. "Lovely Party. Give my regards to your Party Planner. He did a good job." Holding out her hand, she glanced cheerfully at Laura. "You must be his upcoming ex-wife. I'm the first former Misses Quincy. I carry the title with pride."
Laura clutched Tommy's hand but remained silent. Tommy on the other side fought hard not to have her kicked out. "Is there a deeper reason you're here? Other than to intrude?"
"Actually, there is. Have you seen Jude? Shay informed me she's now working for you. Eager little girl. First she used Shay, now she's got her sight on you. I'm a tad bit afraid my brother is the next on her list."
"What list?" Tommy bit out, more than ever interested in the relationship between his assistant and his ex-wife. Jude had mentioned that she and Portia had crossed paths before. But what had happened?
Portia gave a little shrug. "Oh, you know, the list of people to sleep with to make it to the top…"
Although he had to admit he knew Jude a lot less than he had believed, anger built in him. Jude would never sleep with anyone just for a favor. "Watch your words," he seethed, not blind but ignorant to his wife's stunned reaction.
"Don't tell me you fell for it, too. The innocent act, the big gullible eyes and the feisty exterior… It's all just an act, you know? If you want to get to know the real Jude, just tell me. There a quite a few pictures I have, painting a different persona. The things she did…"
"What things?"
It was Tommy's turn to stare in shock at Laura, who became increasingly interested. He'd have dragged her away from his ex hadn't it been for Jude, who was calling his cell just that second. Hadn't it been for her ringtone, informing him it was her, he'd have ignored it. "Excuse me," he said before picking up.
A few steps away from his wife and his ex having a vivid talk, he listened to a rambling assistant. When the words 'help' and 'money' were mentioned, he began paying attention to Jude, instantly forgetting about Portia and his wife. "Hold on, Jude. Start over. What happened?"
"I screwed up, big time. I don't know whom else to call."
"Where are you?"
"Biker's Home. It's a bar down at the docks."
A cold shiver rushed up his spine. It was a place known for prostitution and illegal gambling. "How the hell did you get there?" He hadn't yet finished asking as he was already heading for his car.
"Long story. Please come…"