Disclaimer: I am not Rick Riordan or George Lucas.
Enter Jacen, Danni, and Ben, moving through the forest at the Jedi Praxeum. As they near a stream, Jacen kneels down by marks in the ground.
Jacen. Do those look like astromech tracks?
Ben. Or a mouse droid.
Jacen. It's probably an astromech, which means Fiver went across this stream.
Enter Sannah, a Melodie.
Sannah. Could you be any louder? They'll hear you.
Ben. [blinks] Are you a Melodie?
Sannah. Shh. They'll kill us all. They're right over there.
Sannah points unfortunately in the direction Fiver seems to have gone.
Danni. Okay. We appreciate the warning. What's your name?
Sannah. Sannah.
Danni. Okay, Sannah. I'm Danni. We won't let anyone harm you. Just tell us who you're afraid of.
Sannah. My crazy cousins. You can't stop them. They'll tear you apart. None of us is safe. Now go away. I have to hide.
Exit Sannah.
Danni. Crazy cousins? [frowns at Jacen] Any idea what she was talking about?
Jacen. [shakes his head] Maybe we should keep our voices down.
Ben stares after Sannah, pondering.
Ben. [aside] What is so horrible that it can tear apart a Melodie? How do you tear up water? Whatever it is, I don't want to meet it . . . yet I can see Fiver's tracks on the opposite bank — little square prints in the mud, leading in the direction the Melodie warned us about. [to Jacen and Ben] We have to follow the trail, right? I mean . . . we're Jedi and stuff. We can handle whatever it is, right?
Jacen removes the lightsaber given to him by Lumiya and ignites its emerald blade.
Jacen. Right. Of course.
Danni draws her vibroblade.
Danni. Crazy cousins. Here we come.
Jacen, Danni, and Ben follow the trail laid out by Fiver's tracks, ultimately ending up at the site of the Battle of the Graveyard, during the height of the Sith War.
Oh. This isn't good.
Ben. Why?
Jacen. It's bad luck to be here. This is the battle site.
Ben. [scowls] What battle?
Danni. [raises her eyebrows] How can you not know about it? The other Jedi talk about this place all the time.
Ben. Been a little busy.
Danni. The Battle of the Graveyard. This is where the Sith invaded the Praxeum. While the Jedi ultimately won, it was hard battle. Many Jedi died. This area is still considered cursed.
Ben. Great. Fiver has to run to the most dangerous part of the forest. He couldn't just, like, run to the beach or a tapcafe.
Jacen. Speaking of which . . . how are we going to track him? There's no trail here.
After searching the clearing for a while to no avail, Ben checks his pocket chrono, seeing that they are running short on time.
Ben. If I had more time, I could make a tracking device, but . . .
Danni. Fiver is an R7 unit, right? With a round top and colored black and gold?
Ben. How did you know?
Danni. Because he's right over there.
Danni draws Ben's attention to where Fiver stands nearby.
Jacen. That was easy.
Jacen starts to approach, but Ben holds him back, sensing a disturbance in the Force.
Ben. Someone's coming.
Jacen, Ben, and Danni dive behind a pair of boulders.
Jacen. Ben . . .
Ben. Shh.
Enter the Krath: Keto, Amanoa, Aleema, Rain, Eldon Ax, and Teta - the twisted followers of Ulic Qel-Droma. Each one of them wields a Sith amulet, which they use to harness their connection to the ancient Je'daii.
Danni. [sighs] They're just Melodies, Ben.
Ben. [lowered voice] Crazy cousins.
Danni's eyes widen, and the trio watch as the Krath dance through the forest, singing in Old Corellian.
Jacen. Are they drunk?
Ben frowns, pondering that question, sure that something else is afoot. As he thinks, a krayt dragon is awoken by the Krath. It roars and approaches the Dark Jedi.
Danni. We've got to help them. They'll be killed.
Jacen and Danni start to move, but Ben holds them back.
Ben. Hold on.
Jacen. Ben. We're Jedi. We can't let innocent sentients . . .
Ben. Just chill. Watch.
The Krath squeal with delight as they approach the krayt dragon, and they begin dancing around it.
Keto. Are you Qel-Droma?
The krayt dragon attacks, but Keto leaps out of the way. The dragon manages to catch Keto's arm in his jaws, but the Krath simply yanks it free along with several broken teeth. The krayt begins to panic.
Naughty. Not Qel-Droma. He must join our party.
The Krath surround the krayt dragon.
Danni. [with bated breath] What are they . . . ? By the Emperor's Black Heart.
The Krath throw themselves upon the krayt, tearing the beast apart until it crumbles into dust, returning to the Maw. At the site of the Krath's brutal killing of the krayt, Jacen gulps and begins to pale, horrified even though he once served within the Imperial Remnant.
Oh, dear. Oh, dear.
Ben. I read about these beings. They're followers of Qel-Droma. I forget what they're called . . .
Danni. Krath. I've heard of them. I thought they only existed in the days of the Old Republic. They attended Qel-Droma's parties. When they got too excited . . .
Danni indicates the site where the krayt dragon met its death.
Jacen. We have to get out of here.
Ben. But they're between us and Fiver. And we've only got . . . [checks his chrono] thirty minutes to get the alluvial damper installed.
Jacen. Maybe I can fly us over to Fiver.
Jacen reaches into the Force, but then shakes his head.
I don't know. The Force feels agitated, possibly due to the Krath. Even the Force spirits are too nervous to get close.
Ben. We'll have to retreat to the forest. If we can skirt around the Krath . . .
The Krath approach from behind - Danni is the first to notice.
Danni. Guys.
Jacen and Ben turn around to look at the Krath.
Keto. Hello. Are you Qel-Droma?
Ben. Yes. Absolutely. I am Qel-Droma.
Ben leaps to his feet and tries to imitate the Krath's smile.
Keto. Wonderful! My Master Qel-Droma? Really?
Jacen and Danni rise, their weapons ready. Meanwhile, the Krath giggle and dance, pushing each other around. Though they fell hard off rocks, they do not seem to care.
Danni. [to Ben] Er, Master Qel-Droma, what are you doing?
Ben. Everything's lubed. [exchanges wary looks with Jacen and Danni] The Krath are my attendants. I love these guys.
The Krath dance around Ben, conjuring goblets for him to drink. Then they begin to regard Jacen and Danni.
Keto. Master Qel-Droma. Are these two sacrifices for the party? Should we rip them to pieces?
Ben. No, no. Great offer, but, er, you know, maybe we should start small . . . with, like, introductions.
Keto. [narrows her eyes] Surely you remember me, my Master. I am Keto.
Ben. Er, right. Keto, of course.
Keto. [indicates the other Krath] And these are Aleema, Eldon Ax, Amanoa, Rain . . .
After the introductions, Keto takes a step closer to Ben.
An interesting form you've chosen, my Master - youthful . . . cute, I suppose, yet . . . somewhat scrawny and short.
Ben. Scrawny and short? Well, you know. I was going for cute, mostly.
The Krath circle around Ben, humming.
Keto. So, my Master. Where have you been? We've searched for so long.
Ben. Where have I . . . ? [frowns in thought] Oh, you know. I've been doing, um, wine stuff. Yeah. Red wine. White wine. All those other kinds of wine. Love that wine. I've been so busy working . . .
Eldon Ax. Work.
Aleema. Work.
Aleema spits on the ground, and the other Krath drop their goblets and run in circles.
Krath. Work. Sacrilege. Kill work.
Danni. He means partying - partying. Master Qel-Droma has been busy partying all over the galaxy.
This causes the Krath to calm down.
Amanoa. [cautious] Party?
Rain. [sighs with relief] Party.
Ben. Yeah.
Ben sighs himself and shoots Danni a grateful look, laughing nervously.
Partying, right. I've been so busy partying.
Keto's smile turns cold as she turns to look at Danni.
Keto. Who is this one, my Master? A recruit for the Krath, perhaps?
Ben. Oh, she's my, er, party planner.
Teta. Party.
Keto. What a shame. We can't allow the mundane to witness our sacred revels.
Danni. But I could be a recruit. Do you guys have a HoloNet channel or a list of requirements? Er, do you have to be drunk all the time?
Keto. Drunk? Don't be silly. We're underage Krath. We haven't graduated to wine yet. What would our parents think?
Jacen. You have parents?
Rain. Not drunk.
Rain spins around and falls down.
Jacen. So . . . what are you guys drinking if it isn't wine?"
Keto. [laughs] The beverage of the season. Behold the power of the Sith amulet.
The Krath slam their amulets on the ground, causing a geyser of fizzade to spill from beneath the surface of Centax.
Fizzade.
The Krath rush toward the geyser to fill their goblets.
Aleema. Happy Life Day.
Rain. Party.
Eldon Ax. Kill everything.
Danni takes a step back.
Danni. You're drunk on fizzade?
Aleema sloshes her fizzade and grins.
Aleema. Kill things.
Ben shudders.
Keto. But enough talk, my Master. You've been naughty, keeping yourself hidden. You changed your e-mail and comm code. One might think the great Qel-Droma was trying to avoid his Krath.
Jacen pushes the Krath off of him.
Jacen. [dry] I can't imagine why the great Qel-Droma would do that.
Keto sizes up Jacen.
Keto. This one is a sacrifice, obviously. We should start the festivities by ripping him apart. The party planner female can prove herself by helping us.
Ben. Or we could start with some appetizers. Maybe nerfburgers and hubba chips. And . . . wait, I know. Astromech droids are good for serving drinks.
Keto's smile wavers.
Keto. Astromech droid?
Teta. Hubba chips?
Ben. Yeah, a droid.
Ben snaps his fingers and points to the area where Fiver was last seen.
You know what — I think I saw one walking that way. Why don't you guys wait here, and drink some fizzade or whatever, and my friends and I will go get the droid. We'll be right back.
Ben starts to back away, but two of the Krath push him back. Keto's eyes begin to burn red.
Keto. Why is my lord Qel-Droma so interested in droids? Where is your sabercat and your wine cup?
Ben. [gulps] Yeah. Wine cup. Silly me.
Ben reaches frantically into his utility belt, but all that comes out is a hydrospanner.
Hey, look at that. There's some godly magic right there, eh? What's a party without . . . a hydrospanner?
The Krath stare at Ben, many frowning. Jacen steps to Ben's side.
Jacen. Hey, er, Qel-Droma . . . maybe we should talk - like, in private . . . you know, about party stuff.
Danni. [waves her hand] We'll be right back. Just wait here, you guys. Okay?
Keto. No, you will stay. You do not act like Qel-Droma. Those who fail to honor the Je'daii, those who dare to work instead of partying - they must be ripped apart. And anyone who dares to impersonate the Je'daii, he must die even more painfully.
Ben. Wine . . . did I mention how much I love wine?
Keto. If you are the god of parties, you will know the order of our revelries. Prove it. Lead us.
Ben. [pales] Sure. Revelries. So we start with limmie . . .
Teta. [snarls] No, Master. Limmie is second.
Ben. Right. First is pazaak, then limmie. Then, er, dejarik . . .
Keto's eyes turn completely red as she reaches into the dark side, becoming fueled with Sith magic.
Keto. Wrong. Last chance, and I'll even give you a hint. We begin by singing the Ballad of Nomi Sunrider. You do remember it, don't you?
As Ben hesitates, Danni places her hand on his arm, though she looks about to panic herself.
Danni. Of course he remembers it.
Ben begins to sing, but is cut off by Rain.
Rain. That is not the Ballad of Nomi Sunrider. That is the theme song for BattleSun Odyssey.
Keto. Kill the infidels.
Ben sprays the Krath with deuterium, then uses his pyrokinesis to set them ablaze. Unfortunately, the Krath prove immune to the flames and merely laugh. However, Jacen, Ben, and Danni use this time to flee from the scene.
Thank you, infidel. Our frenzy makes us immune to fire, but it does tickle. [to Teta] Teta, send the infidels a thank-you gift.
Teta skips over to a pile of boulders and lifts one of them into the air, preparing to toss it after the Jedi.
Danni. Run.
Jacen. We are running.
Ben. Run better.
As they reach the shadow of a clearing, Ben senses something through the Force.
Veer left.
Jacen, Ben, and Danni dive behind the trees, just barely missing the boulder tossed by Teta. As they move down a ravine, Ben trips and knocks into Jacen and Danni, causing them to crash into Sannah's stream. As this occurs, the Krath can be heard searching for the Jedi. However, Jacen pulls himself, Ben, and Danni behind an oak tree.
Jacen. How do we beat them? They're immune to fire. They're super-strong.
Danni. We can't kill them.
Ben. There has to be a way.
Danni. No. We can't kill them. Anyone who kills a Krath is cursed by Qel-Droma. Haven't you read the old legends? People who kill his followers go barvy or get metamorphosed into animals or . . . well, dark stuff.
Jacen. Worse than letting the Krath rip us to shreds?
Danni does not respond, but her silence speaks louder than words.
That's just great. So we have to stop them without killing them. You have any stun nets?
Danni. We're outnumbered four to one, plus . . . [checks Ben's chrono] We have twenty minutes until the Situation Room explodes.
Jacen. It's impossible.
Danni. We're dead.
However, Jacen's remark about a stun net gives Ben an idea.
Ben. I've got it. Jacen, you'll have to find Fiver. You know which way he went. Circle back and find him, then bring him to the situation room - quick. Once you're far enough from the Krath, maybe you can access the Force again. Then you can fly.
Jacen. What about you two?"
Ben. We're going to lead the Krath out of your way . . . straight to the situation room.
Danni. Excuse me, but isn't the Situation Room about to explode?
Ben. Yes, but if I can get the Krath inside, I have a way to take care of them.
Jacen. [skeptical] Even if you can, I'll still have to find Fiver and get the alluvial damper back to you in twenty minutes, or you, Danni, and a dozen mad Dark Jedi will blow up.
Ben. Trust me. And it's nineteen minutes now.
Danni. [sarcastic] I love this plan.
Danni leans over and kisses Jacen.
In case I explode. Please hurry.
Exit Jacen.
Ben. Come on. Let's invite the Krath over to my place.
Exit all.