A/N: Firstly, Happy Valentines day all you beautiful people! Here's a nice little gift for you all :) Also, longest chapter to date!
This is the part I've been waiting for. A nice big scene between Sirius and Jules. Let me know what you think :)
Also, a giant, mahoosive thank you to Wikked, Tennismaniac, Raven that flies at night and my lovely guest reviewer. I love you all and love reading what you think of each chapter. Hopefully, you'll all enjoy this one. Also a big thanks to all my followers and a big welcome to you newcomers.
Happy reading :)
The sun crept through a gap in the drapes around my bed. I grimaced as the light hit my eyes through my shut eyelids, the brightness making me all too aware of the throbbing headache I had. I covered my eyes with my arm, hoping that the headache would go away along with the light, and groaned loudly as my stomach churned.
"Lily, look who's finally decided to grace us with her presence." Alice's overly happy voice rang from my right as she pulled the curtains open and bounced onto my bed, almost taking a seat on my head.
"You alright in there?" Lily's sweet voice came from the opposite direction.
"No." My voice was raspy, as though I'd spent all night screaming at a concert or something. I turned over and buried my face in the pillow before I whimpered. The motion only made me feel worse, nausea quickly creeping up on me. "I've just been attacked by Little Miss overly happy over here."
My bed moved under the weight of someone else sitting on it. I peeked up from my pillow, only to be blinded by a mass of fiery red hair. I quickly pressed my face back into it, unable to deal with the pounding of my head when I moved.
"You were in a bit of a state when we finally found you." Alice's was obviously trying to tone it down a bit for me, but I swear her voice was still an octave higher than the average person.
It became difficult to breath as I tried to rack my brains for what had happened. The last thing I remembered was leaving the bathroom and finding a little crevice to drink in. I didn't remember seeing anyone, and the more I tried to remember, the more my head felt like it was going to split open.
"What happened?" I whispered, praying that I didn't do anything to embarrass myself. I peeled my face away from my pillow and turned to look at my fresh-faced friends.
Alice had a small grin playing on her lips. "Oh, you know. The usual. Tear a couple of people a new one, storm out of a party so your two, amazing friends have to come and find you," she winked mischievously at Lily, "only to find you absolutely bungalowed half an hour after you ran off. You sure can knock it back." Her voice was light and airy.
"Yeah, I remember firewhiskey. And lots of it." I sighed, feeling defeated. I dropped my head back to my pillow before moaning into it.
A small, delicate laugh came from Lily as she stood up from my bed and rummaging through her bedside table before returning. "Here, drink this. It should help."
"I really doubt it." I sat up anyway and took the potion from her. "They never helped all that much before."
I placed the bottle to my mouth and tipped my head back, letting the bitter potion fall down my throat. I cringed at the taste but didn't let that deter me. The headache that was threatening to split my head open dulled and as I shuffled to get comfortable, the movement didn't make my stomach churn so much.
"You were in a right state when we found you, sobbing your little heart out." Alice explained, her voice remaining as chirpy as ever.
"Of course I was." Another sigh escaped my lips as I swung my legs over the edge of the bed. I went and stood in front of the mirror to come face to face with a very red, puffy eyed face. It was all I needed to see to know that I obviously didn't stop crying until I was asleep. "That explains the eyes."
I started going through my trunk, extremely aware of both pairs of eyes following my every move. It wasn't long until I got an outfit together and threw it onto Lily's bed before plopping back down on my own between the two girls.
"What had you in such a state?" Lily shifted her weight so that she was sat cross-legged. "You kept saying it wasn't anything to do with Marlene or Sirius but we couldn't understand a word of what you were saying when you were finally ready to tell us."
"It's just, um-" I trailed off not sure whether I even wanted to say anything. My eyes darted from Lily to Alice and back again before I dropped them to my lap.
"You can trust us, Jules." Alice reassured me, not that I needed it.
I already knew I trusted them both, and that they'd both be there the best they could with it. It was just hard to talk about. When I looked into their eyes though I knew I needed to tell them. Joe was right, I was going to need them to help get through this again.
"I don't really know all the details yet." I started to explain, not lifting my eyes from my pillow at the end of my bed. "My mom is ill. She had breast cancer a few years back, ended up having a double mastectomy.."
A tap at the window interrupted me, making me jump out of my skin with a small gasp. We all turned to look at it to see Athena perched on the windowsill.
Without any hesitation I instantly got up and let my owl in, a sudden sense of anticipation washing over me. Athena instantly dropped the letter on my bed before settling next to Lily who's hand went up to stroke her in a second.
I picked up the letter and my heart dropped at the handwriting. It was the one person that I was having torn feelings about hearing from. All I wanted was for her to tell me that everything was going to be alright, yet I knew deep down that there was no chance that would happen.
My hands shook as I fumbled with the parchment, trying to open it as quickly as I could, yet dreading even the idea of reading it.
My Darling Juliet, I've been meaning to write this letter for weeks, at least since they first started running tests. I couldn't bring myself to do it though. At the time, I wanted so hard to believe the cancer hadn't come back and I guess I just believed that it would be real if I admitted it to you. I needed to make sure I knew for sure too. I know what you're like and the last thing you needed was to worry about it if it was nothing. It would have just distracted you from your studies. Your father told me about your chat. Or lack of a chat. You must be going out of your mind not knowing, and I wish more than anything that I could have put pen to paper sooner to prevent that. I have stage four ovarian cancer, Sweetie but it's spread to my liver and spleen. I have an operation next week. I know you're going to want to be there but I really want you to stay there. Knuckle down and work towards your goals. I'll see if your father can sort out you coming to see me during the weekend after though. I'll let you know what he says. I know that you don't want to be reading any of this, but you need to know. You need to prepare yourself that this might not work as well as last time. We might not be so lucky this time and it's more advanced. I'm so proud of you, Juliet. All my love Mom
I let the letter fall down onto my lap, not bothering to wipe away the tears that were streaming down my face. All the anxieties about my mum suddenly all magnified as I reread the letter a second and third time.
Lily and Alice glanced at each other before moving slightly closer to me, Lily placing her hand on mine before giving it a small squeeze. "Take your time, Juliet."
Without a word I just handed the letter to Lily, who proceeded to quickly scan through the letter, her face dropping the smallest amount when she got to the end of it. Her eyebrows furrowed together in concentration as both Alice and I watched her.
"I'm so sorry." Lily whispered before handing the letter to Alice, who's eyebrows knitted together even more.
When Alice placed the letter down, she looked between myself and Lily, confusion ebbed on all her features. "What is-" She cut herself off when Lily sent her a warning look. A look that told her she'd explain it all later.
"You found out when McGonagall came and got you." Lily wasn't asking, she already knew the answer. It was like just by finding out about my mum she could suddenly put all the puzzle pieces together. I didn't have to explain anything to Lily, and for that I was grateful. That really was the last thing I needed to do.
I nodded, my eyesight still blurring from the tears that were a constant stream down my face. It was hard to breath, like the air had suddenly got thinner. The pain in my heart was unbearable, like someone had stuck their hand through my ribs and was squeezing at it. The pain was enough to drown out everything around me, the room, the girls.
Alice grabbed hold of my other hand and gave me a squeeze as she said my name. I'm not sure how many times she said it before I zoned back into the room and turned to look into her big blue eyes. Eyes that I was almost scared to look into.
"Why didn't you tell us sooner?" Her eyes were warm and welcoming, not at all any different from before I had told her.
My eyes slowly drifted up to her own beautiful, bright eyes and I did the first thing that came into my hazy head. I shrugged. "I guess the more people who knew about it, the harder it would be to live a normal life here. The last thing I want is to be pitied."
"Oh, Sweetie," Lily nudged me with her shoulder and smiled at me warmly, "I already pitied you. That whole Sirius, Marlene crap. They're both really rubbish people to be on the wrong side of. That's why we became friends." Lily paused for a moment, a small smirk playing on the corner of her lips.
"Because you pitied me?" I couldn't stop the smile from slowly spreading on my face as Lily did a perfect job of showing that I was stupid for thinking that telling her would change the way she was with me, and an even better job at lightening the conversation a bit. It was just what I needed, a distraction.
"Exactly!" She leapt off the bed, and grabbed my hand before yanking me up to follow her. "Come on, you're not going to spend the day in bed." She shoved me into the bathroom, leaving only once she had turned the shower on for me.
I did as I was told and slowly slipped out of my pyjamas, which Lily and Alice must have put me in at some point. As I climbed into the shower I couldn't help but just stand there, enjoying the feeling of the scolding water cascade down my body. I envisioned it taking my hangover down the drain with it, hopefully the more I pictured it, the more it would actually happen.
I wasn't only washing my hangover away. I was washing everything away. All I wanted was one, stress free day, where I could attempt to live a normal life where I wasn't dwelling on anything. I visualised washing away all the stresses I had been feeling for weeks and decided I wasn't going to let anything ruin the day.
After washing, I was still queasy when I climbed back out of the shower and wrapped myself up in one of the fluffy, red towels. Once I was more or less dry I made my way out of the bathroom to find Lily had laid out the outfit that I'd thrown on her bed.
"It was getting creased." Lily admitted sheepishly. "And I got a bit bored once Alice left." She added with a small shrug.
I flashed her a small smile to show that it was fine before going and changing into the pretty, mint green dress that came off the shoulders with it's three quarter length sleeves. It was tight on the top half, but flared out into a skater skirt at the waist. I paused once I got to the leather jacket I had pulled out with it, holding it gingerly in my hands as I thought back to when Sirius had turned up with it. He'd had enough of me stealing his own jacket, Not that my own ever made a difference to that, it was never the cold that had me stealing it in the first place.
Taking a deep breath I threw the jacket on over the dress and stuck a pair of black pumps on. I glanced in the mirror and saw a girl I hadn't seen in a long time. It was only then, knowing that Lily and Alice knew my small secret that I felt like a load of stress had been lifted from my shoulders.
"You look good." Lily smiled warmly at me and I couldn't help but wonder why she was suddenly being so nice to me when her and Marlene were meant to be best friends.
"Thanks." I grinned back at her. "Lily? What's happened with you and Marlene?"
Lily's face drop, confusion seeping onto it as her eyebrows furrowed every so slightly. Just enough for a couple of lines to appear on her forehead.
"I'm only asking because didn't you two use to be inseparable?"
"She just didn't like that I gave you a chance, I guess." She ran her hand through her hair before pulling it all over one shoulder. "And I guess you just looked like you really needed a friend last night, so here I am." She said with a shrug.
I observed her face as my heart swelled at the thought. I really must have been in a real state last night, because here was someone who barely knew me, going out of her way to make sure I feel like she's there. I gave her a small smile as a thanks.
"Shall we head downstairs?" Lily changed the topic, swiftly avoiding any awkwardness.
With a simple nod I followed her down the stairs, the bounce in my step doing nothing for my still slightly uneasy stomach.
The common room was packed, bustling with life. There was a small group of first years crammed around a table in the corner, obviously trying to get all their work done. There were people playing exploding snap and wizard chess scattered around the room, everyone was talking animatedly to one another.
Lily stood beside me, sort of as moral support. The prospect of seeing either Marlene or Sirius after last night wasn't high on my to do list, but I knew there was absolutely no way I could avoid it forever.
It wasn't hard to find them. They were all sat where they always were; in the group of chairs closest to the fireplace. Peter and Remus were playing a game of chess, the former was losing spectacularly. Sirius was lying across the sofa, his head resting on Marlene's lap as she absent-mindedly ran her fingers through his hair. Alice was sat in the arm chair with James sat on one of the arms, the two of them reading a letter between them.
"No way!" James exclaimed as he reread the letter again. "Can you believe it? A real life giant! Little Frank is all grown up!"
"Little?" Alice giggled, as she snatched the letter out of James' hand to put in her bag. "Frank has never been little."
"You know what he means." Sirius grumbled, his eyes remaining shut tight as he enjoyed the head massage he was receiving.
James turned slightly and we must have caught his attention because the biggest grin appeared on his face. "Well, well, well," He said as I started heading towards the group, "look what the cat dragged in."
"That's a nice way of putting it." I grumbled, still not feeling one hundred percent. It only took a few strides to reach the group and I sat on the floor by Alice and James' feet, resting my head on Alice's knee.
"How are you feeling?" Alice placed a hand on my shoulder and gave it a small squeeze. The presence of it soothed the butterflies that had erupted in my stomach.
"Better than I felt half an hour ago." I tilted my head to look at Alice, giving her a small smile.
Lily chuckled as she shoved Sirius' feet off the sofa and took the seat for herself.
Sirius grumbled something under his breath as he opened his eyes to sit on the sofa normally. His eyes landed on me, running up and down my body, causing me to blush.
"You still have that?" His eyes lingered on the jacket before he looked back at my face. His voice was soft, making me feel like I was hearing it again for the first time.
I put on my best fake smile and simply nodded at him before turning away from him and to the others. "I'm going to head to the owlery for a bit." I lied, coming up with an excuse to leave so I could go and meet Regulus. That and getting away from Sirius was an added bonus.
"Do you want some company?" Lily asked which resulted in a scoff from Marlene.
"I'll be alright. Hopefully some time alone will help clear my head." I gave her a warm smile and pushed myself up off the floor. "I'll only be an hour or so."
I said my goodbyes to everyone who was worth one and made my way quickly out of the portrait hole. I had barely made it down the first corridor when I heard the portrait swing open and footsteps start following me.
Don't be him. Don't be him. I found myself saying over and over to myself as I listened to the footsteps slowly get closer to me.
"Jules!" His deep voice called after me and I sighed out loud, choosing to ignore it.
I took a deep breath and sped up, hoping that there was a slight chance my little legs could carry me away from him. Or hoping that if I ignored him he'd give up. All I knew was that I had to get rid of him. There was no way I could meet Regulus with him on my tail.
"Juliet." His voice was right behind me this time and he grabbed my hand, pulling me to a stop.
As soon as I felt tingles making their way up my arm I snatched my hand away from him. His eyes were warm when I turned to face him and I couldn't understand why.
"What do you want?" I snapped, folding my arms across my chest as I found a spot to stare at over his shoulder.
There was no way he was going to stand there and act like everything was alright. I wasn't some toy that he could pull and push away as and when it suited him. We hadn't spoken in weeks and I was starting to become happy enough with that.
"I-" He took a step towards me. "Can we talk?"
"What?" I shook my head in disbelief as I took a step away from him. I needed to put as much distance between us as I could. The closer I was to him, the less my brain seemed to work. It was like I didn't even know him. Which, I guess was true. I really didn't have any idea which Sirius was the real Sirius. The one I had grown to love, or the one I snapped at last night. I didn't even know which one was standing in front of me.
"I want to apologise." His voice was as soft as his eyes.
There was something vulnerable about him, baring all his emotions on his face for me to see. I hadn't seen him like this the whole time we had been at Hogwarts. It was like my Sirius was finally stood in front of me again, but it was too late. Too much damage had been done for it to just be fixed like that.
"I don't want to hear it, Sirius." I forced myself to stay strong and not succumb to his charm. I'd already fallen for it once, I wasn't about to make the same mistake again. "Besides, even if I did accept your apology, which I'm not doing, it won't solve anything."
"Just give me two minutes." Sirius took a small step towards me. I instantly took a step back trying to keep as much space between us as possible.
"I don't have two minutes." My voice was a lot harsher than I had intended, but it seemed to do the trick of shocking him as he recoiled slightly. I turned back around and left him stood in the hallway, making my way down to the grounds. "I've got places to be." I shouted over my shoulder.
"Stop being so stubborn and talk to me." Sirius was beside me in no time at all, him taking one step for every two I took.
"No." I clenched my jaw together tightly. Maybe the more I showed him how irritated he was making me, the sooner he'd leave me alone. It's not like I'd given him any indication that I even wanted to talk to him. "I'm not in the mood for you today."
"Come on." His voice was almost pleading. Almost.
"I said no." I snapped, not caring about whether I was coming across as bitter or not. "Please just leave me alone."
I stormed down the stairs leading to the castle entrance when Sirius grabbed me by the wrist, stopping me from going anywhere. No matter how hard I tried to break free, Sirius was stronger than me. If he didn't want me to go, I wasn't going anywhere.
"You can't run away from me forever." He tried looking deep into my eyes but I just stared at the floor. There was no way I was going to give him any chance to lure me in, and his eyes were his biggest chance. He knew it, I knew it. We both knew it. "I'm not going anywhere until you hear me out."
"Why can't you just accept that someone doesn't want to talk to you?" I snapped, finally looking at him square in the eye. My jaw clenched as I stood my ground. "This isn't the Sirius Black show. Other people have feelings, and what I'm feeling towards you right now is severe dislike."
One side of Sirius' mouth twitched upwards a fraction. "If you want me gone you know what to do."
"You're right." I threw my hands up in the air, finally ripping my wrist out of Sirius' cage like grip. "I accept your apology. I even forgive you. Now leave me alone."
This time Sirius didn't try to stop me from walking off, instead choosing to run in front of me and turning to face me, walking backwards as he did.
His eyes darted around before he stopped in his tracks, me shortly tumbling into him. His hands automatically landed on my hips in the process and for a moment I froze up. My heart went into overdrive, crashing wildly against my rib cage as I did.
"I thought you were going to the owlery?" His eyes seemed to grow darker as his thumb gently rubbed a circle on my hip.
"I...um-" My mind went blank as I looked up at him. It had been a long time since we had been so close to each other and it was the last thing I had expected. "I lied."
"So where are we going then?" He took one hand off me and tilted my face up to try and get me to look into his eyes but I yanked my head away, my neck jarring as I did.
"We, are going nowhere." I winced, rubbing my neck with my free hand. I took a step back, making sure that I was well out of Sirius' reach. "You are going to leave me alone and go back to your friends."
I wasn't about to let him ruin my plans, and just because he has tried to do the right thing, once, it didn't mean anything. We still weren't friends, and unless he changed entirely, we weren't ever going to be friends. I had accepted it, and was fine with it. I had to be.
"What are you hiding, Juliet?" He lowered his husky voice and took a step closer to me.
We were so close to each other that we were almost chest to chest. My heart was beating so hard I could hear it and the blood rushing in my ears.
"It doesn't concern you." I couldn't get my voice to amount to anything more than a weak murmur.
If anyone was going to be able to get it out of me, Sirius would. He'd known me better than anyone else I had met in this country. He knew when I was lying, even if no one else could figure it out.
"So it's a big secret?" Sirius' eyes lit up at the prospect. It was like he saw me and my secret as some sort of challenge. "One you haven't told anyone?"
"It doesn't matter. Please, just drop it." I rolled my eyes and took yet another step away from him. "I really do need to go."
"Come on." Sirius gave me his most charming smile. Not his cocky or arrogant one, but the one that would be enough to make any girl weak at the knees. "You know you can trust me."
My stomach tied itself in a knot as I took in every last detail about him. It seemed like he was being genuine, but we all knew how it ended the last time I thought that. Thankfully, I didn't have to give him the satisfaction of an answer.
Regulus was walking past us, obviously on his way to our meeting place when he turned to flash me the smallest of smiles, his eyebrows furrowing as he nodded towards Sirius. I lifted the corner of my mouth, hoping that Sirius wouldn't catch the tiny facial movement. I could have hoped and prayed and it would have been useless.
Sirius turned to follow my gaze, his eyes locking onto his brothers and in that split second it was like every single thing about Sirius changed. His whole body tensed up at the sight, his hands were clenched so hard it looked painful. He turned back to face me, anger clouding all of his features.
"No." Sirius shook his head at me, his eyes slightly wider than they would normally be. "No!" He spun away from me, storming to where Regulus had exited the castle, obviously set on causing yet another scene.
"Sirius! Stop it!" I shouted after him, pushing my little legs to catch up with him and grab him by the elbow. "What do you think you're doing?"
"I need to knock some sense into that pillock!"
"No you don't!" I spun him around to face me and I knew there was a scowl resting on my face. "He's my friend."
A sense of satisfaction washed over me as I watched Sirius' face drop. I only felt it for a moment though, as I knew it was only a matter of time before yet another argument started.
"My brother?" Sirius' eyebrows were furrowed as his brain processed the information. He looked at me in disbelief as he waited for an answer.
"So I've been told." I fought to stop the smirk from appearing on my lips. If there was one thing I didn't need, it was to rub Sirius up the wrong way even more.
"He wouldn't-" Sirius cut himself off, unable to get any words out. "He doesn't-" He tried again and I pushed the urge to roll my eyes away. "He's a Death Eater!"
I scoffed at Sirius as I shook my head at him. "It's not going to work."
"What's not?" Sirius' grey eyes filled with worry as he ran them over me.
"You trying to make up some story so I stop hanging out with him." I let out a soft laugh as I stepped around him. This time he didn't even attempt to stop me as the shock of what I said finally sunk in.
"I'm not making anything up, Juliet." Sirius fell into step beside me. "You haven't told him you're mum's a muggle?"
This time I stopped on my own accord, shocked that Sirius even knew that. I'd never told him. In fact, the only people I had even spoken to about it were Regulus, Lily and, "Alice." I whispered. "He knows everything. I have nothing to hide."
Sirius stopped, turning to face me again. "So he has some other reason to be spending time with you."
"Why can't you just accept that we're friends." I let out a breath through my nose as I stared at him. I didn't understand how he could be so incredulous.
"Because he wouldn't waste his time on people like you! Not unless he was getting something out of it!" Sirius' words rang through me, leaving me staring at him in shock as they slowly sunk in one at a time.
"People like me?" I whispered, my mouth opening and closing like a fish. "So, you're so different to your brother because you'd waste your time on people like me? Well, purely for the fact that you see a difference, you're no better than what you're saying he is."
"That's not what I meant." He reached out to grab my hand but I pulled away before he got close enough.
"At least Regulus has never once tried to even imply that I'm any different to him just because my mom's not a witch." I backed away from Sirius. "Regulus is my friend, and nothing you can say will ever change that, because let's face it. He's been a better friend since I got here than you have." With that I turned away from Sirius leaving him gaping at my back.
"Don't walk away from me, Juliet!" His voice bellowed as I reached the door Regulus left through. "I am trying to help you!"
I stopped in my tracks, anger bubbling up in my entire body. I took numerous deep breaths as I tried to push the feeling away. Nothing worked. Instead, I turned around slowly to face him, not even trying to hide my feelings any more.
"You lost any right to 'help me'." I stalked closer to him, opening and closing my fists as I did. "You lost any right to try and be there for me. You lost the right to warn me about anyone." I prodded him in his chest as hard as I could. "You lost ANY right to be! In! My! Life!" I poked him with each word to emphasize them.
"Calm down." Sirius threw his hands up in the air in some sort of attempt to get me to listen to him. "You don't know what he's like."
"I don't want to hear what you have to say!" I fought the urge to to continue poking him.
"Tough." Sirius took a step towards me before grabbing my shoulders and moving me so my back was against the wall. He placed a hand on the wall, on either side of my head. "You're going to shut up and listen."
"No, I'm not!" I tried to shove him away from me, but my attempts were futile, only adding to my aggravation. "You have been nothing but a dick to me since I got here! You have hurt me every chance you got! And now you want me to listen to how you suddenly care?"
"He's going to hurt you!" Sirius' voice was pleading as he ignored anything I said, his eyes begging me to listen to what he was saying.
"And you didn't hurt me?" I snapped, moving my eyes into his. He seemed shocked at my outburst. "I doubt there is anything he can do to me that will ever compare to how you've made me feel."
The arms that were trapping me against the wall dropped down and Sirius took a step back. His eyes filled with sadness as he searched my face. My own eyes were filled to the brim with tears threatening to fall.
"I-" He started stammering. It was the first time I'd ever seen him unable to form a single sentence. "I haven't-"
"I don't want to hear it, Sirius." My voice was weak. I slammed my eyes shut and pinched the bridge of my nose as I willed myself not to let him see me cry. "Just leave me alone. Please, stay away from me."
Sirius grabbed for me one last time, but rather than pulling away I removed my wand from my the inside of my jacket and pointed it at his chest.
"You might be of purer blood than me, Black," One stray tear cascaded down my cheek, "but that sure as hell doesn't make you better than me. I can still put you on your ass. Come near me again and, I promise you, you will regret it."
I made my way around Sirius, not giving him the chance to say anything else. The minute my back was to him I swiped the tear away from my cheeks remembering Regulus' words about not showing him weakness. Thankfully, when I could hear Sirius' footsteps they were heading in the opposite direction.
It was like I could suddenly breath again. Any frustration that I felt drained away with every step I took away from him. It was replaced by doubt.
Sirius had seemed genuine and I couldn't shake the feeling that despite how much time I had spent with Regulus, there was something he was hiding from me. I shoved the thoughts out of my mind, internally scolding myself for letting Sirius get into my head.
He was just pissed. That was it. He was trying to feed me false information so I would get scared and just cut Regulus off. If he was only friends with me to get to Sirius he wouldn't have come up with the idea to keep it quiet. He would have wanted me to tell Sirius about it weeks ago.
My head was swimming with so many thoughts that it was starting to get impossible to decipher each individual one. I stopped paying attention to anything around me as I rubbed my temples to ease off the headache that was creeping back up on me.
Sirius' words swam back into my mind and I knew I had to speak to Regulus. I knew that he wasn't very open with me, but that didn't mean he was using me, did it? He wasn't just using me to get to Sirius. He can't have. Sirius was wrong. He didn't know what he was talking about. That was the only possible explanation.