Distance
Ryou was set to find Bakura and decided to check from the classroom first. The other's memories had told him so much and he felt like he could understand now, behavior, motives maybe. The pain and loneliness had resembled his own so much that no matter what kind of person Bakura was now, no one deserved to go through any of that and who would be perfectly sane and "normal" after something like that in their past.
Despite the similarities, Ryou had had it easy; his father hadn't completely abandoned him as a child, just sort of started avoiding him after his mother had died. Ryou had made friends; he had someone who cared about him. Bakura had no one. He vaguely wondered if that man who had offered to train him or that other man with the fangs had been close to Bakura, friends maybe? Had they cared for him? The mere thought of never having anyone there who cared pained Ryou, it almost felt like physical pain.
He had often been told that he was too sensitive, too quick to forgive and too willing to give second chances, but that was just him, he couldn't help it. Compassion was something he had always hoped for and eventually gained, he wanted to be able to give that to someone else who needed it too, to anyone who needed it. Compassion and companionship.
He turned in a corner and almost collided with someone. Ryou looked up, amazed by the fact that he had been able to stop on time. "Bakura... I-"
"Let's go somewhere to talk," the teacher said and grabbed Ryou's arm, dragging the boy with him. Ryou let him since the hallway wasn't the best place to have a meaningful chat and soon found himself in a cleaning closet. The dark, small room was a strange choice of location but at least it was private and no one was likely to walk in on them.
They just stood there for a long while, facing each other but keeping as much distance as possible, which wasn't very much in the small space. Bakura leaned against the door while Ryou had his back on the back wall, both thinking what to say first and waiting for the other to start.
"How much did you see?" the one against the door spoke up.
"Not much... Just random flashes. Was that... Did that really happen?" the boy asked carefully.
A small nod. "That was not something you were supposed to see."
Ryou bit his lip, nervous about what he was going to say. "I didn't mean to... You... you must have gone through a lot..." The other said nothing so he decided to continue. "Was that man... the one who left you, your father?"
Bakura's eyes narrowed. "That does not concern you. What happened in my own past is my business and no one else's." He was tense and on guard, resembling a cornered animal, ready fight his way out if need be. Ryou quickly avoided looking in his eyes and looked down, trying to appear less threatening.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to pry." A quick glance at Bakura before he spoke quietly. "After my mother and sister died, my father was crushed and since I resembled my mother more and more every day he couldn't take it and was away on business trips and such a lot. He was hardly ever there and I was pretty much alone most of my childhood, just taking care of myself." He glanced at the other again who still looked wary but didn't glare so much anymore. "You might not want to hear this but after what I saw... I felt like I could understand you better and-"
"Spare me the 'I know what you went through' –speech," Bakura said harshly. "I have heard enough of that for one lifetime already. You don't know shit and I don't need your pity," he spat. "What you saw will never leave this room and we will not discus it again, understood?"
Ryou did something he wasn't even expecting himself to do and reached to touch Bakura's face, gently and hesitantly. He didn't pull away even when the other looked about ready to bite his hand off, just looked him in the eye, trying to convey all his will to try and understand, and that, despite all the problems the other had caused, he was still ready to forgive him and offer companionship.
The other didn't pull away from his touch, not that he had much room to do that, just stared in some sort of disbelief and wariness, once in a while glancing Ryou's hand like it might be some kind of threat. Ryou smiled at him sadly; this must have been the first time someone was ready to be there for him.
"I'm not saying that I fully understand what you went through... I-I just want you to know that if... if you ever need-need someone t-to..." Why was this so difficult? He had edged a bit closer as he spoke, feeling drawn to the disbelieving depths of the slightly widened eyes. "...to be there o-or..." Their faces were so close now and it became increasingly difficult to concentrate on what he was saying, to concentrate on anything else except the eyes that looked lost. Bakura had pressed himself against the door, hand searching for the handle but stopping when Ryou gently placed his other hand on his.
"...B-back off..." It felt so weird to hear the ever so confident teacher stammer with no strength in his voice.
"I wanted to let you know..." Ryou trailed off, faces only centimeters apart, eyes becoming half lidded. And then...
Hand found the door handle and they both fell back, out of the door.
Eyes widened as they laid on the floor in a heap of limbs, lips having connected when they hit the floor. Neither moved or breathed, just stared each other in the eye, unable to comprehend the situation. It was like their brains had decided to have a coffee break right then. There was no one in the hall as everyone was in class, which was good because if anyone had seen, they would have been in serious trouble.
Brains came back from coffee break and Ryou hastily pushed himself off of Bakura who sat up just as quickly, both gasping for air. The boy backed away from the other, sitting back against the opposite wall, eyes still wide and having trouble to believe that just happened.
"I-I'm sorry! I didn't mean to, it just..!" he hurried to apologize. "...you know, sort of happened!" What was he doing back in the closet then?
Bakura too still sat on the floor, staring. "I would have never thought that you had it in you."
"Huh?" Was Ryou's oh-so-intelligent comment before he realized what the teacher was referring to. "I didn't plan that! It just felt like the right thing to do at the moment! It's not like I... It's not like I wanted to kiss you or anything!" At least he didn't think he did... "I just wanted to... After I saw that- I mean that your behavior makes more sense now and I just... Felt that I should-! Let you know and- you know! I-!"
"Ryou, shut up."
"Ok..." He didn't know what he was trying to say anyway and was starting to rant.
"Look, I don't want the 'I'm here for you' -speech either. I only get one from people who either pity me from some reason or-" Bakura paused to give the boy a look. "-want to get in my pants."
Ryou's jaw dropped at the implication. "I'm not a part of either of those people!" he exclaimed. "Why would I want to sleep with you?!" Just then the classesended and the first people who opened the doors heard his high pitched yell and stopped to stare at Ryou who had stood up and yelling at Bakura who still sat on the floor.
The boy looked at the students and blushed in embarrassment, looking away. Bakura got up from the floor and dusted himself off before turning to all the staring students.
"I trust you all have classes to go to," he said with a raised eyebrow that hinted that he was expecting them to run along and fast. They turned away and hurried to where-ever they needed to go, whispering with each other after they had gained some distance to the two and thought that they wouldn't hear.
The two stood there for a while, Ryou being still red.
"I have a class to teach and believe that you should be attending yours," the teacher said, voice and face expressionless now.
"I think I just skip today..." the boy said, not looking at the other.
"Just remember to come to our lesson after school." Bakura turned to leave and Ryou just stood there before he too left to go to his room, wondering what had gotten into him in the closet. He wasn't really about to kiss the other, was he? He unconsciously raised his hand to touch his lips and turned pink again.
xxxxxxx
Out of all the reactions Bakura had expected to get, that had been the most unlikely one. Yet... It had happened anyway, go figure. He hadn't just known how to react, back in the closet. That was the first in many ways; for one he always could handle any situation, yet in the closet, he hadn't been able to do anything when the boy had so willingly offered to understand and be there, even after all the times he had proved to be a complete bastard. He was pretty sure that no one else would have done that, no one else had ever done that. First time for everything...
"I swear that kid is some kind of saint..." He didn't realize that he had muttered that out loud but didn't care. His personal angel in disguise... Bakura snorted at the thought and got a few weird looks from his students. "Yeah right..." Since when had the boy become his anyway? Well, technically at the moment he had made that deal with him.
And what was with the kiss? He could have sworn that Ryou was going to kiss him in the closet, though the boy had denied ever wanting to do such thing. He must be in denial about it himself, after all, if Ryou wasn't going to kiss him, what the hell was he going to do then? Head-butt him?
It had been so unlike Bakura to go all... weak like that. It wasn't like he had never been kissed before, but the difference was that it had always been about lust. This time, if Ryou had truly kissed him and not just accidentally landed on top of him like that, it would had been about something else entirely. What exactly, Bakura didn't know but it wasn't lust.
That sort of scared him... Lust he could deal with but anything deeper was unfamiliar to him. People were naturally scared of things they didn't understand.
He noticed that he should now give his students homework before they could slip away from him. Maybe he could give some extra homework since he was in such a good mood. "Ok! Read chapters ten to fifteen, we'll be having a test tomorrow and finish your group assignments, you have to be ready to present them by... Thursday. Finish copying the stuff on the board before the bell, oral test about it people!"
"Excuse me but isn't that a bit much? I mean two tests tomorrow and the assignment..." one of the students asked carefully.
"No, of course not." Bakura grinned, flashing his unnaturally long canines, giving his 'question my authority and I'll bite your heads off' -look. "You all live in school, what else would you do than study?" The bell rang. "No one leaves until the stuff on the board is in your notebooks!" The class groaned quietly but no one left. "Oh don't be like that, this is all for your own good." And for his own amusement.
Eventually they all got the copying done and were allowed to leave, it was the last period of the day and all were in a hurry to get away. Bakura set to wait for Ryou to get there. The knock on the door didn't let him wait for long.
"It's open!"
The door opened and the boy stepped in, closing the door behind him. Ryou came to the desk and glanced at the board full of small writing, reading the first few lines and getting caught into reading it all. Bakura watched the boy with interest as he seemed to suck in all the information. Then he turned his eyes on Bakura, them shinning with some kind of excitement.
"You're teaching this to your class?"
"Trying to anyway." The teacher shrugged.
"Can you give me a moment to copy it?" Ryou pulled a notepad and a pencil out of somewhere. Bakura took a hold of the notepad and saw the small transporting circle on it, raising an eyebrow at the boy who smiled sheepishly. "Copied that from you, just in case I needed to write something down."
Bakura nodded. "Not bad. Go ahead, you're coming to my class tomorrow anyway. Test about it."
"Do I have to take it too?"
"No, but I would prefer if you did." He looked at Ryou who, surprisingly, blushed under his gaze. Bakura took careful notice of this. It seemed that the whole closet incident had affected the boy too... He smirked a bit.
"Tell me something; I haven't exactly been nice to you so why did you offer to 'be there for me' back in the closet?"
Ryou glanced at him. "Well, I just... I sort of know what it feels like to... lose family and be left alone so I..." He trailed off.
"Hm, offer noted and appreciated."
The boy directed his surprised eyes on him and opened his mouth to say something but was stopped by Bakura's finger. Ryou glanced at the finger, eyes wide, and then back at Bakura.
"But... that doesn't mean I'm going to take it," the teacher continued, eyes never leaving the other's. "That kind of things get in the way and friendship, or anything like that, is not really my thing." The boy didn't say anything, not that he could with Bakura's finger on his lips, just listened, eyes wearing an expression of sympathy.
The finger was removed and Bakura turned away to reach for a book on the desk. He then handled it to Ryou who took it, looking confused.
"You should read this, found it from among my books. It deals with the mind. I don't feel like this today so you can go." Then he turned away completely, waiting for the boy to leave him alone. Instead a hand carefully landed on his shoulder.
"Bakura? Are you-?"
The teacher turned around quickly. "Just go already!" he yelled and Ryou stepped back and let go. "Go!" He pointed at the door. Ryou looked hurt but turned to leave.
When the boy was gone Bakura sat on his desk, holding his head with one hand. Friends, lovers, whatever, they were all weaknesses and nothing good ever came from having any of them. His mentor had taught him so on early age. One couldn't afford to lose focus, it would never lead to anything good. He couldn't afford that. Couldn't afford to give the boy a chance to sneak into his life, his heart. It seemed that Ryou would have a damn good chance to pull that if given the chance, he was already in his mind after all. The best solution was to push him away while he still could...
xxxxxxx
Ryou got back to his room, confused about the teacher's antics. What had that been about? It had almost seemed like there was something there, that had changed, but then Bakura had just pushed him away. He seemed to be so... scared about Ryou's companionship offer...
"Ryou! Hi! Hey I heard so- What's wrong?" Malik stopped his attack when he saw Ryou's thoughtful and worried expression.
"Oh..." The boy flopped on his bed, looking down. "Just something with Bakura... I don't really understand him at all... I thought I could but..." Or maybe he could... If Bakura hadn't had any friends, ever, then it would kind of make sense that he was afraid to let people close. Ryou looked back up at his friend. "What were you saying?"
"Oh just a rumor, I'm sure," Malik said and Ryou already regret ever asking. "I heard from this one guy that you had yelled something about wanting to sleep with Bakura in the middle of a hall. I was just wondering-"
"I-! I asked why would I want to sleep with him!" Ryou exclaimed. "I did not say that I wanted to!" This was exactly the reputation he had always wanted... Now he was the kid who wanted to sleep with his teacher...
Malik raised his hands. "Ok, ok, don't get so worked up about it. But... why did you need to ask that anyway?"
Ryou managed to calm down a bit. "He hinted it..."
"That you should sleep together?"
"What? No! That I wanted to get in his pants! I don't even know how that came up, or yes I do, kind of... But I don't want to talk about it!"
"Fine, I'll drop the subject..." Malik sounded a bit disappointed.
Ryou was glad he did, that was not something he wanted to discuss right now. He needed to think, and maybe do some schoolwork...