Disclaimer: I still giggle while watching the show...

A/N: I really like this one. I love it when they are more vulnerable.

None of this is beta-ed yet by the way.

Enjoy,

~Rose

Chapter Nine

"I don't wanna hurt, there's so much in this world to make me bleed"

School seemed to go very slowly the next day for Rick. Lit was by far the longest and most torturous class of the day. Kate was so zoned out that Rick didn't even get a chance to talk to her. He watched her play with her curls and bite on the end of her pen. She would probably think all the staring was creepy but he didn't care because he thought her mannerisms were cute.
After school the young writer decided that it was finally time to confront his muse and find out why she was being so hot/cold towards him. It didn't take him long to get to her house and he took a deep breath before knocking on her door.
"Rick?" Kate questioned as she opened the door, "What are you doing here?" She had been surprised that he had left her alone at school today (well other than all the staring he thought she didn't notice) but she never expected him to show up at her door. She shouldn't have been surprised. She was actually thrilled to see him, but she'd never let him know that.
"Hey Kate," Rick responded with a smile, "is this a bad time?"
"Not at all," she replied honestly, "come in." She didn't have to tell him twice and soon they were both sitting on the living room couch. Kate was glad that her father wasn't home. "So what do you want Rick?" Kate asked him, trying to keep her tone light.
"I just wanted to," Rick started, "I just wanted..." For the first time since Kate had met the writer he appeared to be at a loss for words. She motioned for him to just spit it out and he continued, "I just want to know where I stand with you Kate. Are we friends or what? I can never tell with you because one day we have a really great day and do things like cook each other supper and play laser tag and then the next day you won't even look at me." Kate opened her mouth and then closed it again, clearly now the one at a loss for words. "I'm sorry if I'm putting you on the spot Kate, but I'm just trying to understand what's going on in your head."
The pretty brunette had no clue what to say. She never expected Rick to call her out like that. No one ever called out her erratic behavior, but then again she never let anyone close enough to notice her erratic behavior. "I'm sorry Rick," she said softly. It sounded like a goodbye.
Don't Kate, Rick pleaded internally. Out loud he said, "You don't have to apologize Kate; just tell me why." He needed to know why she was so determined to push him away. He had an idea, but he wanted to hear it come out of her mouth first.
"I don't..." Kate struggled to find the right words to say. What was she going to tell Rick? A lie wouldn't work this time; the boy could see right through her. Shocking both herself and Rick, Kate started to tell him something she didn't usually say: the truth. "I have issues getting close to people. I just... I just don't get close to people. I'm not one to make friends Rick."
"I'm not an enemy Kate. Why are you so scared to get close to me?" Rick asked moving closer to her.
Kate wanted so badly to not be scared to get close to him. She wanted to wrap herself in him and not let go until she felt better. "I'm so sorry Rick. I just don't know how to get close to people."
"Just let me in Kate," he said softly, looking deep into her eyes. He kept getting closer and closer and by this point he was so close that she could feel his breath hot on her face. He made her dizzy.
"I don't know how Rick." She couldn't look into those ice blue eyes anymore. She shut her own hazel ones and hung her head.
"Look at me Kate," he said softly, moving even closer to cup her cheek with his palm. "Hey," he said even softer when she opened her eyes, "what are you so afraid of?"
Kate took the leap and reached forward to touch Rick's face. "I'm afraid that everyone I get close to will leave me like my mom did. I'm afraid of getting hurt. It's a war out there Rick..."
"And there's so much in this world to make you bleed," he replied in barely more than a whisper. Her eyes were full of unshed tears. "Come here Kate." He opened his arms and she allowed herself to fall into them before he pulled her tighter to him and held her head to his chest. "You don't have to be afraid of me leaving you Kate. I'm not planning on doing that any time soon."
She pulled away just enough to look into his eyes. They shone with sincerity and she knew he was telling the truth. "Bare with me Rick. I'm not used to people caring." He gave her a small smile and held her to him for another moment before loosening his arms and letting her go.
"I will Kate, I will." He sat down again and she followed. "Now if you don't mind me asking, what did happen to your mother?"
She took a deep breath and prepared to explain. "It was January ninth, two-thousand-eleven. My dad and I went out for dinner and she was supposed to meet us there but she never showed. When we got home there was a detective, Detective Raglan, waiting for us. She was found in an alley."
"I'm so sorry Kate. Do you know who killed her or why?" Rick knew this must be hard for her to talk about.
"No," she said trying not to cry again, "I thought it might have had something to do with the 'Take Back the Neighborhood' campaign she was running in Washington Heights or the other three murders that occurred around the same time but no, Detective Raglan summed it up to be gang violence. It was like he didn't care enough to try to solve it. I wish I could've done something Rick, but I'm just a teenage girl, I'm not a cop!"
"I wish I could do something too Kate." He leaned forward and gave her another quick hug.
"Thanks for everything Rick," she told him whole heartedly.
"Always."

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