DECLARATIONS OF A DIFFERENTIATED TEEN
By Alahria Silvermoon
Disclaimer: Refer to chapter one.
Thursday, 14th November, 5:06am, Girls Dorms
I should of known.
I totally should of known.
Maybe somewhere deep down inside of me, I had a teeny-weeny feeling that my happiness was not going to last.
Because when does it ever last?
Well, I am sure that you would like to know every single detail about what happened. Including why I am up at this time.
Actually, that has nothing to do with this at all. I just woke up and couldn't get back to sleep.
But anyway. Moving on.
It has to do with Snape.
Big surprise.
So you know how I was all happy about standing up to him and everything? Well, that only lasted until Sunday.
Yesterday.
Whatever.
I was once again walking innocently to the Gryffindor common room, when I was cornered by Snape. Again.
"You will be sorry for your little outburst," he hissed at me, grabbing onto my arm.
I tried to shake him off. It didn't work.
"And what are you going to do about it?" I asked defiantly.
"Like I have told you before," he stated. "I will reveal all of your secrets."
"Go ahead," I said bravely. "I have nothing to hide. And anyway, do you think anyone would actually believe you?"
He turned a rather dark shade of red. "I will make you sorry that you ever came to this sad excuse for a school."
Uh, this school is actually one of the best schools ever. We are educated in everything.
He so should have gone to Durmstrang. I heard that they teach nothing but Dark Arts there.
Okay, back to the topic.
"And just how will you do that?" I asked.
I was just being inquisitive, that's all. You know the saying, curiosity killed the cat? Well, I'm the cat. Except I haven't been killed yet.
I really don't want to die.
ARGH. Why do I always go off topic?
Anyway, he said; "You will soon find out." And then turned and walked away.
I have to say diary, that I wasn't feeling scared at all. I was pretty confident. I mean, what's the worst he could do? Drown me in his greasy hair?
Oh, ew.
Seriously, though. It's not like he can Avada me or anything. Not in this school.
Oh, wait. Moaning Myrtle died here. Well, in the toilet. I wonder how she died? Maybe she got locked in the toilet like I did and starved to death.
Uh…
Okay, so I was all happy-clappy and jolly-wolly. Until things started going wrong.
Just little things, though. Like me tripping over and falling flat on my face. And my bag breaking so that everything fell to the floor. And my hair getting singed.
It's all because of Snape. Him and his stupid cronies. They keep jinxing me and annoying the hell out of me. They think it's funny. But it's not.
Lily and Julez successfully hexed them back. I tried, but it didn't go very well. But I can do a really strong Shield Charm. Mine knocked Snape over so that he fell right on his butt.
It was hilarious. Teehee.
But he didn't seem to think so. Neither did his friends. They all just glared at me.
Lily wants to tell Mcgonagall. I said no way. Like teachers are going to anything. They totally just make it worse.
But I can't keep on living in fear like this. I am too scared to leave my dormitory.
I can't believe I am even in Gryffindor.
5:32am
Shadow just jumped onto my bed. She hissed at me and tried to scratch me when I went to pat her.
I would really like to know what her problem is. I never did anything bad to her.
Like, I was never one of those kids that dresses up their cats in dolls clothes and makes them join in on their 'tea parties' and then marry them off to teddy bears.
I got her when I was 7, by the way.
You'd think that she would of accepted our differences and put them aside by now.
I so wish she could talk. That would be so cool. A talking cat.
Hehe.
5:37am
I am going to make a start on my Transfiguration essay.
HOW TO DO A NON-VERBAL SPELL
To correctly compose a proper non-verbal spell, one must think of the spell. One must then concentrate only on the spell, and nothing else. Concentration is the key. Saying the incantation in one's head will complete the spell and the spell should be performed perfectly. If not, then there has not been enough concentration.
This is so stupid. We have to write three pages on how to do the spells and what happens if you do and if you don't and why it doesn't work and why it does.
I hate essays.
11:03am, Girls Dorms
I can't believe he is doing this.
Snape and his stupid friends are going after my friends now.
Yep, that's right. Julez and Lily are now suffering.
This is so not fair.
11:06am
That's it. I am going to do something. I am going to tell Snape that I will help him.
It's the only way the stupid prat will leave them alone.
And besides, what if he really hurts one of them? Like, he could make Julez fall down the stairs and she could break her neck and end up seriously injured.
Or he could make Lily fly out the window and she could end up dead or something.
I really wouldn't put it past him.
11:10am
REASONS WHY I SHOULD HELP SEVERUS SNAPE1. Because if I don't, then he will keep on hexing Lily and Julez and maybe eventually do some serious harm to them.
2. Because if I don't, then he will continue hexing me and eventually do some serious harm to me. Although, I guess I wouldn't mind if it was just me. Like, if he left Lily and Julez alone and just hexed me and stuff. I'd be okay with that.
3. He will reveal some of my secrets. Like how I like Sirius and how I never liked Tristan. And I really don't want anyone getting hurt.
REASONS WHY I SHOULD NOT HELP SEVERUS SNAPE1. If I do help him, then I will be betraying my friends. Although I don't know if I can actually call the marauders my friends. But I still talk to them and I like them as people. And besides, one of them is going out with my best friend and I am in love with another one.
2. He is a slimy git with exceptionally greasy hair and an abnormally long nose and I hate him. Who helps their enemies anyway?
11:19am
Okay, so the reasons for not helping Snape were longer by one point.
But I can't really betray Sirius, James, Remus and Peter.
So therefore, I have made the decision to help Snape, while trying not to.
That doesn't make sense, does it?
Well, I know what I'm talking about.
11:21am
I so hate giving in.
2:03pm, Care of Magical Creatures
I really should abbreviate that.
2:05pm
So I told Snape that I would help him. He smiled evilly (again).
This is so not fair.
And now he is making me hex James using a silencing charm so that he can't talk.
I told Snape that I'd probably end up killing James or something and he said; "Good."
He is so sadistic.
And do you want to know what he threatened me with?
He said that he would continue hexing Julez and Lily, getting worse each day. And maybe one day, he will accidentally slip up and they will end up getting seriously injured.
So I have the choice of either betraying the marauders or betraying my best friends.
Naturally, I have to choose Julez and Lily. If anything happened to them, I'd probably go crazy and end up in St. Mungo's.
4:05pm, Gryffindor Tower
Okay, so I did it.
And felt really bad.
I made sure that I was behind James as we were both walking down the corridor. He was chatting to Sirius. Then I whispered 'silencio' and pointed my wand at him.
And it actually worked. James stopped talking all of a sudden and started flapping about, grabbing his throat. I had to quickly hide my wand.
Okay, so the one time I actually do a spell properly I don't actually want to do it…
I feel so bad. Poor James.
They didn't work out what had happened. Thank god for that.
4:08pm
They are so going to find out.
Snape will probably 'accidentally' let it slip somehow.
And then Sirius will hate me forever and we will never be together.
And James would hate me too, and then if Sirius didn't already hate me, he would because of James.
And Remus would hate me, and then his relationship with Julez would be screwed up.
And Peter would also hate me…
I hate it when people hate me. It makes me feel like a horrible person.
Oh wait. I am a horrible person.
I am so dead.
4:18pm
Lily just asked me if I was okay, and then told me that I looked like Moaning Myrtle.
I replied that I was fine, and I was just having a bit of difficulty with my Transfig. essay.
So she is helping me.
Friday 15th November, 1:04pm, Gryffindor Tower
Snape made me strike again.
This time, he threatened to 'accidentally' push Julez down the highest staircase he could find. And then throw Lily off the Astronomy Tower.
I had to hit Sirius with a laughing jinx while we were in class. It was slightly off, so he didn't laugh half as hard as he was meant to.
It was during DADA and everyone was listening to the professor blabbering on about the dark arts. I managed to do it secretly, so that no one noticed.
When Sirius started laughing, Professor stopped talking and glared at him. Everyone else gave him weird looks.
He just kept on laughing, though.
"Cut it out, Padfoot," I heard Remus whisper.
"You all right mate?" James asked him.
"Can't…stop…laughing…" Sirius managed to get out, before bursting into fresh peals of laughter. He was hunched over, clutching his stomach.
By this time, the whole class was in hysterics. Trust Sirius to have the class in an uproar.
I didn't find it funny at all, though. I felt horrible. And I still do.
Eventually, Professor told him to go and see Mcgonagall and so Sirius went. And then she must have realised that it was a laughing jinx, because she took it off him.
1:07pm
Oh god.
I just heard Sirius say; "When I find the bloody person who dared to hit me with that stupid laughing jinx, I'll kill them."
He is so going to hate me.
He didn't seem that angry, though. Just slightly annoyed.
"But it was a bit funny," Peter said with a small, nervous snicker.
"Yeah, real funny Wormtail," Sirius replied, rolling his eyes.
1:11pm
He just caught me staring at him, and gave me a weird look.
Ohmygod.
I bet he knows it was me.
I am so going to die.
11:03pm, Girls Dorms
ARGH.
I cannot sleep at all.
I am really pissed off and angry and nervous because of the whole Snape thing.
I can't believe that someone can be that evil.
He now wants me to hit James with a spell called 'Sectumsepra'. It's a non-verbal spell as well.
Apparently, it makes you blow bubbles out of your mouth.
Ugh.
I have to do it on Monday.
I can't believe he is making me do his dirty work. What a coward.
ARGH. How I detest him…
Monday 18th November, 7:02am, Girls Dorms
Okay, so I ended up falling asleep.
But I kept on waking up during the night.
And I had a really scary dream.
I was walking down the corridor behind Snape, and for some reason I took out my wand and used the 'Avada Kedavra' curse on him. He fell over, and then turned into James.
And then I realised that I had killed James.
And Sirius tied my hands together and made me apparate to Azkaban were I was doomed to spend the rest of my life.
And I could never eat a potato again.
It was so freaky.
8:07am, Great Hall
Okay, so I ate heaps of potatoes in case my dream actually came true.
And no, it isn't funny.
I was seriously scared.
Shut up.
Uh…
Well, sectumsepra time!
And I guess it could be worse. Like, its just bubbles coming out of his mouth.
I don't like being mean to people…
11:12am, Gryffindor Tower
Oh god.
I can't believe it.
I killed James Potter.
11:16am
I am horrified.
11:19am
I can't believe I did that.
11:20am
I can't believe he did that.
11:23am
I am so done.
I won't let him torture me like this any longer.
Not after this.
11:24am
He isn't dead.
Just seriously injured.
Crap.
11:26am
I mean, I know he hated the guy, but still.
I hate Marietta with a passion, and do you see me blackmailing people to try and kill her?
Well, not kill. But seriously injure.
11:29am
I suppose you want to know what happened.
This is a complete and utter disaster.
Okay, I'll tell you.
Although, you should brace yourself for a tale of horror and bloodshed.
You ready? Okay, don't be too shocked. It is Snape, after all.
I seriously didn't think he was that evil. I mean, I knew he was into the dark Arts and everything, but I didn't realise that he would actually like, perform an act of evil.
Actually, I was the one who performed the act of evil.
I feel so bad. I am such a horrible person.
Well, there is no point on putting it off any longer.
Okay so it was break and I was casually walking behind James to the Common Room. Only a few people were around, and since I am invisible at this school (apart from when I do stupid things to make people laugh at me), I decided to just do it.
So I took out my wand, pointed it at his back, and said in my mind, "Sectumsepra."
And then…oh god it's so horrible.
The spell worked. The stupid spell actually worked.
And do you want to know what it did to him?
When the spell hit him, he immediately hunched over, giving a small yelp of pain. He fell to the floor, and a few drops of blood fell to the floor with him.
A few people shrieked, and some ran off in search of a teacher. I just stood there, completely horrified.
People were crowding around him. He was kneeling on the floor, clutching his chest in pain and groaning quietly.
Then, Professor Mcgonagall came running up, took one look at James, and turned pale. She helped him up, and walked off with him, calling over her shoulder for someone to go and get Professor Dumbledore.
And then stupid me ran after her.
"Is he going to okay?" I asked, and my voice was actually trembling.
"I think so," she replied curtly. "Do you have any idea what happened?"
"Uh, I was, um, walking behind him," I said, trying to think fast. "And then, he…uh, fell over and then there was a lot of blood."
"Are you all right, Miss Woods?" Mcgonagall asked me.
"Yeah, fine," I said quickly.
"Who could have done this?" Mcgonagall wondered out loud.
"I, er, don't know," I answered.
"You look like you're in a bit of shock," she said, sounding sympathetic. "I think you'd better come along to the Hospital Wing."
So I went with her to the Hospital Wing.
Madame Pomfrey almost had a heart attack when she saw James.
"What happened?" she screeched.
She made me panic even more. I think I was on the verge of hyperventilating.
"The boy was hit with a spell," Mcgonagall said hastily. "I don't know which one, or exactly what happened. But Miss Woods tells me that he fell over out of nowhere and then the blood appeared. I'm guessing that he was hit by a spell. But I cannot think of any that would cause such a horrendous thing like this to happen."
James was now on a hospital bed, and Madame Pomfrey was fussing over him, pulling out her wand and muttering various spells.
"Will he be okay?" Professor Mcgonagall asked.
"He should be fine," Madame Pomfrey answered. "The cuts weren't deep enough to cause any serious harm."
"Yes, I hate to think what would of happened if they were any deeper," Mcgonagall said.
Then she must of realised that I was still there, because she suddenly turned to me.
"So you do not know who could have done this?" she asked me.
"No, I don't," I lied.
"Well, I will have to talk to Professor Dumbledore about it," she said. "You can go now, Miss Woods. Potter will be fine, make sure you tell his friends that."
I nodded. Then I turned around and made my way back to Gryffindor Tower.
On the way, Sirius, Remus and Peter came running up to me.
"Is James okay?" Sirius immediately asked.
"We heard about what happened," Remus added.
"He's fine," I said in a small voice.
"Can we visit him?" Peter's squeaky voice spoke up.
"I…I don't know," I said truthfully. "Madame Pomfrey was still trying to make him better when I walked out."
"I'm going to see him," Sirius said determinedly. "See ya Evelyn."
He took off down the corridor. Remus and Peter hastily said goodbye to me and hurried off after him.
And then, Snape came up behind me. I didn't see him, until he spoke.
"Well, that was simply perfect," he said silkily. "I didn't know you had it in you."
"What was that spell?" I asked quietly, turning to face him.
"Just a little one I found," he answered, with that evil grin on his face.
"He almost died." That was all I could say.
"I didn't mean for him to die," Snape said hastily. "No no, what happened was precisely what I planned. You see, I knew your magic was too weak to perform the spell properly, in which case Potter would have almost certainly died. But since you are nothing but a weak, pathetic witch, he will live."
"Why can't you just leave me alone?" I asked him defiantly.
"Because I am a Slytherin," he said proudly. And then he walked off.
That evil git.
I still can't believe that I almost killed James Potter.
11:44am
If anyone finds out about this, I will probably be suspended from Hogwarts.
Actually, I'll probably be expelled.
I mean, Dumbledore is nice and all, but he's not that nice.
I almost killed one of his students, for crying out loud.
Even though it was totally unintentional. But as if anyone would believe me.
I can't believe Snape tricked me like that.
I can't believe that I was actually stupid enough to do a spell I had never heard of before. And it came from Snape as well.
I am so screwed.
Seriously.
11:49am
But should I just confess to it?
Like, go to Mcgonagall and tell her what happened?
Sure, it might get me into a lot of trouble. But it could be the best thing to do.
I really need someone's advice. Too bad I can't tell anyone.
I have no idea what to do…
A/N: I didn't particularly like this chapter. Much too dark and dreary. However, it will go back to its usual cheeriness. The new chapter will be brighter. :)
Smiles to:
go somewhere whist i review: Your names aren't funny at all. They are just sad, and they make me extremley sad for you that you are such a sad person. Well, it looks like you enjoyed the previous chapter lol. A lovely long review...sigh. :)
The Lost Tear: Haha I thought the dreams were funny as well. (Is it normal to find your own story funny?) The world is full of sadistic people lol. Thanks for your review:)
SiriuslyPadfoot101: Glad you liked the chapter. Random dreams are funny. Poor Evelyn had no idea what was in store for her, did she? Thanks for reviewing:)
Paddie'sGirl: Lots more torture yet to come! I'll try and add more of Marietta, you will see quite a bit of her in the next few chapters. Thank you for reviewing:)
January Ember: I'm glad you find it funny, kinda the whole point lol. I'm glad you like it! Thanks for reviewing:)
DM's Mystery Girl: Yeah, Tristan annoyed me too lol. I just wanted to get rid of him. Well, yes, Snape does have something planned for Evelyn. Thank you for reviewing:)
fanXforever: Yeah, blackmail sucks. But I agree with you that it does make a good storyline. Thank you for your review:)
Josephine Taylor: Evelyn is way obsessed with Sirius, isn't she? Getting hyped about a hug and all. Well, thanks for reviewing:)
BlackSnowPetals: It's about time she stood up to Snape, isn't it? Haha the dream was just a whole bunch of randomness thrown in together. Thanks for your review:)
Maraudess: I have no idea what the name 'Evelyn' means, it was just a random name I picked out one day lol. I'm sorry to say that it will take ages for Sirius and Evelyn to get together. But then again, I may just mix it all up and make her not get with Sirius. Who knows? Hehe thanks for all of your reviews:)
Okay, so I have some good news and bad news. The good news is that I have now officially finished Year 10 (as of a week before Christmas), and I am not going back to school ever again. Instead, I have started a hairdressing apprenticeship (I'm going to be a hairdresser!). I will be working five (maybe six) days a week, an average of about 8 hours per day. And I have to catch the train to and from work, and since it is in the middle of the city (of Sydney), it will take me about 40-50 minutes to get there and 40-50 minutes to get back. Basically, I will have to wake up at 6:00 every morning and get home at about 7:00 at night. I am prepared for this, and I know I can do it. But the bad news is that I won't have much time to write my story. I mean, sure, I'll try and write on the train and when I get home at night and on my days off. But I don't know how that will work out. The point I'm trying to make is that I won't be able to update very often. I will try as hard as I can to update maybe once every two weeks, but I'm not sure if that will work. But just know that I will never give up on this story, even if I don't update for months (which would be very rare). Keep looking for updates, because I promise that they will keep happening. :)
Anyway, chapter 9 got so many reviews! I am so happy, you guys made my day. :) Thanks so much, I appreciate you all so much for taking the time to read and review. Review again and get lots of smiles!
See you all next chapter! (Which will hopefully be soon). :)
xoxo -Kath-