I may have reblogged some AU prompts on tumblr and one may have been about meeting while buying condoms and it may have been requested so um ta da?

Foolish Wand Waving

'There's nothing wrong with buying condoms,' James chanted in his head over and over like a mantra. 'It merely shows that not only are you a responsible adult, but a responsible adult that's more than likely getting some later.'

Or at least that was how Sirius reassured him at any rate.

Except he wasn't getting laid later and he was a far cry from a responsible adult- person- thing. Instead, he and Sirius came up with this stupid (albeit genius) idea for a prank. They had both gotten an email stating that class was cancelled in the morning and what better way to celebrate not having to pretend to pay attention to their philosophy teacher drone on and on than with a prank?

It didn't take much to get them rearing for it anyway. Earlier that day, Snape had switched the sugar and salt jars at James and Sirius' table before they arrived for breakfast, leaving them both retching after making their tea. They were both hell bent on getting swift and a thousand times more embarrassing revenge on him.

Enter condoms.

After the initial rejoice over not having class, a wicked grin broke out across Sirius' face. He had it on good account that Snape did have class the next morning, meaning that his dorm would be empty. Meaning that their swift and a thousand times more embarrassing revenge could be executed.

"I know exactly what to do," Sirius grinned before drawing a pot of what looked liked seemingly regular glue closer to him. "I saw him chatting up your redhead bird a while back."

The back of James' neck heated up. "She's not my redhead anything," he said awkwardly, "Just the girl who works the counter at the drugstore."

Sirius scoffed and rolled his eyes. "That you like to chat up every time you go there," he accused, "Besides, I got it out of Reg that sometimes she even goes up into his dorm. Don't know how they manage to that without anyone prattling. Guess it might be because everyone knows that there's a greater chance in me failing to look handsome one day than Snape actually getting anything."

"Hang on a tick," James said, frowning, "Didn't they have that huge falling out some months ago?"

Sirius shrugged. "How am I supposed to know? I don't keep tabs on the broad," he said. Without waiting for James to put in his two cents, he continued, "Back to the prank; I need you to get me as much packs of condoms as possible. The small ones preferably."

James' eyes widened. "Come again? Why do we need those for a prank? And why do I have to go get them?"

An arm slung behind James' shoulders. "I reckon we should do a bit of redecorating for Snivelly, don't you?" asked Sirius, "And you have to go because I, unlike you, have a reputation to uphold."

"What, and I don't?"

"No, not really."

James shoved Sirius away and the latter stumbled into a desk. "You're an arse," he said bluntly. "Your idea, you should go get it."

"I don't have time for this," Sirius groaned, checking his watch. "The store closes in twenty minutes. Why don't we flip on it?"

James searched around his pockets for a moment before throwing Sirius a coin. "Calling heads."

With a nod, Sirius threw it in the air and caught it, smacking it on the back of his hand. "Good call, mate," he said, showing him the coin before slapping his back. "Have fun at the store," he called out, throwing some notes his way as well as a coat. James reciprocated with a rude hand gesture.

Ten minutes found him outside the drug store, steeling his nerves for what he was about to do. Sucking in a breath, he pushed open the door, cringing at the bell that alerted everyone of his presence. Hello fellow customers don't mind me, just here to pick up some condoms.

Thankfully, the store was virtually a ghost town. He released the breath he held before grabbing a basket and setting off down the aisle. He stopped in front the neatly laid out display and grabbed the smallest size he could find, throwing all of it in the little basket.

Oh yes, James was definitely the epitome of not a responsible adult and definitely not getting laid that night.

He turned on his heel and walked back to the front of the shop, trying his best to act as though buying out the smallest size condoms on a Sunday night was something he regularly did and it was a totally and completely normal thing to do. The hard part was next though. Hopefully the cashier won't judge him too much. He was going to kill Sirius Black.

As he approached the counter, James stopped dead in his tracks and the basket almost clattered out of his hand. Long, dark red hair covered the side of her face, but James was ninety nine percent sure he knew who was there at the counter.

He was going to fucking murder Sirius Orion Black when he got back home.

Just his bloody luck that the one time he didn't want to see the amazingly funny and pretty girl he had a crush on (not that Sirius knew of course, he just liked to take the Mickey), would be the one time the two of them were alone in the entire store. He had been working on trying to get her to go out with him for ages now and all of that effort was about to go down the drain because of this dumb prank. Running a hand through his already mussed up hair, James decided that his best course of action would be to bluff his way through the entire, painful ordeal. His signature smirked gripped his lips and he stuck his chest out as he walked up to her.

"Evans," he greeted, trying to repress the heat gathering at his cheeks. "How goes things?"

Lily glanced up from the magazine she was idly flipping through at the sound of his voice. "Potter," she replied, stowing it back on the rack. "What brings you here two minutes before closing time?"

James shrugged nonchalantly. "Nothing much. Just needed some supplies is all," he said lightly, his grip on the basket handle tightening. Without another word, he lifted it up and emptied it in front of her.

Lily's eyebrows rose as she took in the slew of boxes he had just thrown in front her. She glanced back up at him and bit her lip in an effort to try and contain her smile. She picked up a pack and examined it, and James shoved his hands into his jeans pockets to stop himself from messing up his hair again. "Rather ironic considering what a massive prick you are at times," she said, her voice tainted in mirth, "I guess you've got to make up for it somehow."

His cheeks blazed as almost as bright as the box she still held in her hand. "Well it's not for me," he huffed, giving into the urge to run his hand through his hair and causing it to stick up every which way. "It's for… a friend."

"A friend," she said flatly although her eyes were glinting happily. "Your friend wanted you to buy him over twenty boxes of condoms?"

He was going to strangle Sirius Black with those condoms as soon as he got home. "Yes," he nodded once, "He has a lot of, ah, fun planned for them." Well, it wasn't necessarily a lie.

Her lips twitched and she started to ring up the amount on the register for him. "I can imagine," she snorted, placing them into some bags for him. "You- I mean your 'friend'- will have enough fun to last for months."

His mouth fell open. "You still think they're for me, don't you," he accused.

"We all have things we don't like other people knowing," she shrugged, scribbling something on his bill before she handed over his bags.

He handed her the money. "Bloody hell I can't believe you think this is for me," he groaned.

Lily locked the register and walked out from behind the counter. She patted his arm soothingly. "It's alright, mate," she said, "Not judging."

"Are too, judging,' he replied.

"Well, maybe a little," she conceded.

James glared at her. "Fuck off."

"Oh sweetheart," Lily smirked, he hand still resting against his biceps, "It looks like you'll be doing enough of that for the two of us."

James made a spluttering noise as he choked on air at her insinuation. "It's for a prank, Evans!" he said at last, "I will not be using this in any shape or form other than for that of the prank."

She looked up at him, still smirking, and crossed her arms over her chest. "I still don't believe you," she told him easily.

He mimicked her stance and the toe of his trainers rubbed against her shoes. "Well, I certainly know that it's true."

"Yes, but how can I know if it's true?"

He shrugged. "You're just going to have to take my word for it."

Lily rolled her eyes. "Your word isn't really something I'd put a lot of faith in."

"You wound me, Evans," James gasped, stumbling back with a hand atop his chest.

"Good, now go home and sulk about it to Pretty Boy," she said, shooting a wink at him as she gently pushed him out the door. "It's already past closing time. I'm not going to stick around if any other customers decide to show up."

Easily, James stretched out a hand behind him and flipped the sign on the door so that it now read 'closed' instead of 'open'. "That was easy," he said, "You know what would also be easy? If you actually believed me."

"Hmm," she said thoughtfully, her eyes raking up his figure appreciatively. Once they settled back to his face, her smirk had returned full force. Again, she pushed him out the door and this time she managed to get him past the threshold. "The only way you'll actually get me to believe you is if I see some proof," she told him. And if that didn't have him short circuiting, then the wink she directed his way surely would have done him in.

James froze and he tried to figure out whether or not he heard her clearly. Once he deduced that he was not going mad and the Lily Evans he had been pining over for the last few months or so had actually said that, he rocked back on his heels and said, with a lazy grin, "I can make that happen if you'd like."

Her smirk widened. "Good. I'm free Friday."

He almost toppled over. "Wait," said James, mussing up his hair, "Are you serious?"

"Number's behind the receipt," was all she said before finally closing the door and locking it shut.

James stood in front of the drug store for a whopping two minutes, doing nothing except staring open mouthed at the spot where she stood. When he finally caught himself, he snapped his jaw closed and riffled through the bags before he came across the strip of paper she had tossed in there. Sure enough, messily scrawled behind it in blue ink was a cell phone number with the name Lily underneath and a heart over the 'i'.

He felt his lips curve up in a smile and he pocketed the receipt. Maybe by next Friday he'd be a responsible adult who was probably going to be getting some.

My apologies for any errors. It was a bit slap dash and I didn't have the time to reread.