Thank you Lauren J. That was exactly what I needed to read. You're completely right.
PANCRAZIO CULLEN
July 2033
I had to admit, I was more excited about this pregnancy than Chantelle's last. We didn't know what would happen to her last time so it was a lot scarier.
Chantelle and I always disagreed on our children. When we were younger I knew there was a part of her that didn't want them and then there was a part of her that wanted a lot like Nessie had because she didn't have many siblings growing up; only Nessie and Eddie, and she wanted her children to have more. I knew it hurt Chantelle not having another baby after Sophia. She wanted Sophia to have siblings to play with; but she had William and all of Nessie's kids, Nessie and Jake didn't seem to be able to stop reproducing. It was funny the way Emmett loved joking about it but I knew It made Nessie happy and how much it would make Chantelle happy to have that many children.
Only problem was Nessie gave birth to 5 human children, Chantelle would be having all hybrid births and whilst she doesn't die from them like humans do, it hurts her more than a normal birth would; and in turn hurt me.
We never discussed having another baby anymore, the first few months of Sophia's life we argued about it a lot. I hated how much she had to go through just for my baby and I was scared that if she ever got pregnant with twins it would kill her. She, on the other hand, wanted another baby because she knew Sophia would be fully grown in 7 years; just how both of us had.
It was a week before Sophia was scheduled to go camping with the Black kids. Sophia was staying at William's and Chantelle and I were alone. I was almost positive we had conceived the baby that night.
It was times like these I felt so young with Chantelle, yes we had a daughter and although she was still very prominent in my mind and my ever growing worry and concern about her and William, I was able to relax when I was alone with Chantelle. I felt so young and carefree when I was with her. It was almost going back in time to before we were married.
Getting pregnant a second time was not planned. It was too early to really know what happened. I didn't want to bring it up when she was so emotional. I knew she was pregnant the day Sophia left for the camping trip but I needed to speak to Chantelle before I said anything to Sophia, I knew she would be happy but I needed to know Chantelle was first. I don't know why I thought she wouldn't be though; she's wanted another child since the day Sophia was born.
"I know" I told her after we had said goodbye to Sophia.
"Sorry?" she asked me with a frown. I took a breath and walked up to her placing my palm on her stomach that was the tiniest bit bigger than it normally was.
"Oh" she mumbled dropping her head. "I was trying to think how to tell you but I hadn't worked it out yet" she said with a shaky voice. She thought I was going to hate her. After nearly 20 years together she still didn't know me completely. I reached for her face with my other hand and cupped her jaw before making her look at me. My other hand on her stomach wrapped around her waist and I pulled her towards me, kissing her.
"You're not mad?" she asked as we pulled away. I smiled at her and shook my head. I would ask her after she had given birth if she purposely stopped using her pill without consulting me but for now I'd be supportive and help her through this, there was no way we weren't having this baby, planned or not. I couldn't kill a child like that, and I couldn't take this away from Chantelle or Sophia. Sophia wanted this more than anything in the world and although she didn't know about it yet, if she found out I made Chantelle give the child up she'd hate me forever and I couldn't have my daughter hate me. She already hated me enough for giving her a hard time with the imprint. I wouldn't take this away from her.
If I kept telling myself we were doing this for Sophia I would get through it.
Chantelle smiled back and brought me back in for another kiss. I would wait to find out but for now I let myself go over why this was good. It made my wife and daughter happy and that was the main thing, I was determined not to worry about Chantelle and how she would get through this. She's done it before and we got through it, we'd do it again.
That mentality was hard to keep after a few weeks. Sophia was staying at Nessie and Jakes whilst Chantelle and I were at the Cullen's main house. We moved back into our old room but that was really only a room for me to sleep in. Chantelle was kept mostly in the living room on the ground floor so Carlisle could keep an eye on her and get her into the medical/study room quickly if needed. In reality I never used the bedroom. I stayed there the first night but it was strange sleeping without her next to me so from then on I stayed in the living room. Sophia came to see us every day as Chantelle got bigger and bigger. Only one and a half weeks away from giving birth was when the bone breaking began and I refused to let Sophia see her mother, I knew she hated me for it but Nessie was kind enough to agree and keep Sophia occupied and keep reassuring her her mother was going to be ok.
It was a week to go when Sophia came walking into the house.
"Im not a child I want to see mom!" she argued with Emmett when her refused to let her enter the living room.
"Sweetheart you don't want to go in there" he was trying to soothe her.
"Grandpa" I heard her sobbing.
"Zio let her in, I want to see my baby" Chantelle whispered to me. She was on the couch with the IV in her arm. Her stomach was bulging and the purple bruises forming and healing every minute. I frowned at her and stroked her hand. "I want to see our daughter" she whispered and tears were falling from her eyes. She flinched and I looked down to her stomach that had a fresh bruise on it. I watched it heal before standing up. Rosalie moved with me and I watched her place a blanket over Chantelle's stomach. I reached the door and opened it.
"Daddy!" Sophia exclaimed and tried to reach for me.
"Let her go" I told Emmett and he watched me carefully before letting Sophia go, she collided with my chest and hugged me. I held her and walked with her into the living room.
I was aware Nessie and William followed us in. I brought her over to Chantelle who was now sitting up with Rosalie sitting next to her making sure the blanket didn't fall. Chantelle's pyjama top was too small to cover the bump. Sophia had tears in her eyes when she reached to hug Chantelle gently. I let her go and walked over to Nessie. Her smile dropped when she saw me.
"im sorry, shes so much like her mother I couldn't keep her there, she was angry and upset and it was effecting William, I just brought her here to talk to you, I know you didn't want her seeing Chantelle and im not trying to comment on your parenting skills, I agreed to some extent but a girl needs her mother, I would have been upset too if my dad didn't allow me to see my mom when she was pregnant with Eddie just because he didn't want me to remember it in years to come. She was missing her terribly." Nessie said quickly. William was holding her hand in comfort. I smiled at her.
"I understand, its ok, I forgive you" I laughed. "It was wrong of me to keep her away but I didn't want to scare her" I said quietly. I knew Chantelle and Sophia were holding their own conversation so I hoped they weren't listening to mine.
"Honey she may be only 13 but shes an adult. We were adults then. I was a mother of 3 by the time I was 13 and you had had Sophia by the time you were too. You can't judge her for her age." she laughed.
"I know and it's not that shes not grown up enough it's that shes going to have hybrid children. I didn't want her to see this as her future" I said carefully looking briefly to William. His face dropped as he looked at Chantelle.
"I didn't think of that" he mumbled very low, I knew it was impossible for Sophia to have heard. Nessie reached to hug William's waist.
Neither did I, but Zio she needs to know this. She needs to see what it's like because if I hadn't seen when Lauren was pregnant with Chantelle or when my mom was pregnant with Eddie I would have been more scared of the unknown having Sarah. At least I knew what to expect. Sophia needs this, she needs to know and experience things from the outside so she has the experience to apply to her own life. I know it's her mother and I know it's a horrible thing to see at any age, I remember seeing my mom pregnant with Eddie and not understanding it fully but it's cruel to keep a child from their mother. Im not trying to judge you but I think you need to let Sophia make her own decisions now. She said, projecting her thoughts into my mind soothingly as she held my hand. I turned back to Sophia and Chantelle sitting with Rosalie. They were laughing at something and Chantelle was glowing, she didn't look ill at that moment, she looked happy to be with her mother and daughter. I turned back to Nessie and nodded.
"Thanks" I mumbled I hadn't thought of it in the way Nessie did. She smiled at me and let go of William to pull me into a hug. Anytime little brother. She joked and I smiled as I dug my face in her shoulder and just for a second I felt like a child again. Nessie was my big sister growing up. She was everyone's big sister.
"How long now? A week?" I heard Sophia ask and I pulled away from Nessie to turn to her.
"About that long yeah" Chantelle said.
"Do you have names?" she smiled. I walked over to Sophia and sat on her left since Chantelle was on her right.
"I have a few but im still not sure about girl names" she admitted.
"Tell me what my brothers called then" she smiled.
"Matthew Lucas" she said with a smile.
"That's cute. Why Matthew Lucas? I mean im named after your birth mothers. Who's Matthew and Lucas?" she asked.
"You wanna explain?" Chantelle asked me. Sophia turned to me.
"Matthew is my brother, or step brother actually. His real name is Matteo but that's the Italian version of Matthew. My mother's husband is called Lucas, after my mother died he remarried and had a son named Matteo. When I went to see my sisters, my biological sisters, in Italy they lived with Lucas and his wife and son. Matteo quickly became my brother, even though he isn't directly related, he adored me, he was younger and I suddenly felt like a big brother instead of the little brother I was to Nessie and Eddie, they are very much my second family and I know we haven't taken you to see them yet but we plan to once your sibling is born. If it's a boy that will be even better because we can tell Matteo." I explained.
"So he's named after grandma's husband too?" she asked.
"Lucas was very welcoming to me. He showed me love and family even though he knew i wasn't his son but after I explained what I could without telling him our secret he welcomed me into his family like his own son. He didn't have to let me see my sisters but he did and I will always be grateful for him for being so forgiving." I told her and she smiled.
"I'd really like to meet your family you know" she said.
"One day I promise" I assured her and kissed her temple. She then turned back to Chantelle.
"That's sweet and everything but what if I have a sister?" she asked. Chantelle smiled then shrugged.
"I have a few names I like. Rosanna Renesmee. Rosa Bella or Rosa Esme. I just don't know who to have as the second name. Of course the first name is going to be something to do with Rosalie but im still unsure." She said.
"I like Rosa Bella" Sophia smiled. "It's almost like one name, it's cute."
"But then I feel like I should have Renesmee and Esme in the name too. They've been the four most important women in my life growing up. I wanted them to be a part of the name, I feel like im choosing between them" she laughed.
"Don't be silly my dear. Just being involved in this is enough for me, I love all my great grandchildren and another is simply a blessing" Esme said and stroked Chantelle's hair.
"Well if you think about it. Esme is in Renesmee's name so why not Rosabelle Renesmee. That's Rose and Bella in the first name and Nessie and Esme in the middle name." William said then. It was the first thing he had said since he got here to Chantelle. Chantelle looked up at him and smiled.
"I love it, thank you William" she grinned wider. He blushed slightly and smiled back. I noticed Sophia was smiling too.
"So Matthew Lucas or Rosabelle Renesmee" Sophia smiled. "I can't wait".
"Me neither" Chantelle smiled and ran her hand over her stomach. She flinched slightly and everyone's smiles dropped.
"You ok mom?" Sophia asked.
"Yes sweetheart. He or she is just kicking; it's getting a bit cramped in there." She flinched again and I wrapped my arms around Sophia and pulled her off the couch. Carlisle took her place.
"What's wrong?" Sophia asked as I pulled her away. Chantelle gasped again. "Mom?"
Chantelle let out a scream.
"Get her out!" Rosalie shouted at me. I dragged Sophia towards the door.
"No!" Sophia shouted.
"Sophia" I begged her.
"Mom?" she was asking. Chantelle refused to look at her. Nessie was dragging William out the room too. William gripped Sophia helping me to get her out the room. I closed the door behind us.
"What's wrong with her?" Sophia sobbed.
"The baby is in distress" Nessie answered.
"How do you know?" William asked his mother; his panic equalling Sophia's.
"I just do" she told him, familiarity running through her voice and William didn't question his mother again. I remembered the days she was pregnant with Sarah and she'd go through spasms of pain like that. I think a part of him, although he was only very young at the time remembered it too.
"Is she going to be ok?" Sophia asked just as there was a crack of breaking bone and then Chantelle screaming. Sophia flinched and William wrapped his arms around her in comfort.
"Now you know why I didn't want you here?" I said in desperation. It was killing me not to be in there with Chantelle instead I had to deal with my over curious 13 year old.
Sophia nodded against Williams chest; tears falling from her eyes. I wanted to comfort her, I didn't mean to snap at her like that but I had my mind on my wife.
"Take them home" I ordered Nessie before going back into the living room. Emmett had Chantelle in his arms as he carried her towards the medical room. She was gasping in pain as Carlisle ran his hands over her body determining the break.
"Ribs" she gasped as she found it difficult to breath.
"Alright" Carlisle said and injected some pain killers into her IV. "Im afraid I can't do much for broken ribs sweetheart. You know that" he told her and she nodded between her gasps.
Over the next week I didn't see Sophia again. I was starting to feel guiltier the way I spoke to her on that day. I knew I shouldn't have reacted like that but I was so distressed with Chantelle and the pregnancy. There was a reason I was allowing her to stay at Williams. I hoped he would distract her enough not to want to come here.
That was beside the point though. The damage had been done and Sophia had seen the horror of a hybrid pregnancy.
SOPHIA CULLEN
It felt like I was being held prisoner in my boyfriend's house. I knew they were trying to keep me away from my mother and I was getting tired of it. It was my mom and I knew she was going through something tough and I wanted to be there.
I managed to get away one afternoon but I was aware of Nessie and William following me to the Cullen's. Needless to say I didn't return to the Cullen's after that day. I knew why my dad was keeping me away; he was protecting me from the sounds I heard that day; the breaking of my mother's bones and the sight of my mother pale and looking ill.
Nessie and William took me home and I was silent the entire way. When we reached the outskirts of La Push I began walking towards my house. Not Nessie's house but I walked to where my own bed was; where my parents should have been.
"Sweetheart" Nessie tried to get my attention.
"I'll stay with her." William said softly. "Go home mom, I'll make sure shes ok" he assured her but I didn't turn around to look at them. I was aware of William following me slowly, a few feet behind me. I arrived home and found the spare key in the plant pot before opening the door and walking through the empty house into my bedroom. The house was eerily quiet. Neither William nor I were making a sound as we passed through the house. I passed the nursery that was already set up for my new sibling. I knew Alice and Esme had been here preparing it for the homecoming of my parents and new brother or sister. I collapsed onto my bed and started sobbing. Will's arms circled me and he pulled my back into his chest as he lay behind me. He kissed my shoulder and arms comfortingly.
"That's gunna be me Will" I told him my fears. It wasn't just the fact that was happening to my own mother. I was suddenly scared for myself.
"I know" he replied. His voice was unsteady and I knew my pain was affecting him. I turned in his grasp so I could face him.
"Im sorry" I told him trying to comfort him too.
"Don't apologise. We're meant to be in this together" he told me and kissed my nose. "We'll get through it. You might not even have a hybrid baby. My mom had 6 kids and only 1 is a hybrid." He told me. I nodded, desperately hoping he was right.
"You still want me to have your baby though right?" I asked him then, suddenly dreading his answer.
"As long as you want it of course." He assured me.
"So you're not scared?" I asked him. I could see him contemplating whether to be honest or lie to me to make me feel better. He opted to be honest.
"I am scared yes, but I know you can get through it. You're strong, just like my mother was and your mother is being now. It won't kill you and the chances of a hybrid for you are low anyway." He said truthfully. I was grateful he didn't lie. I kissed his nose before curling into his chest.
"Thank you for not lying" I told him. He didn't say anything, just kissed my head.
The week went fast, I stayed away from the Cullen's but I was still scared for my mother, I was thinking about her more and more the closer it came to the due date of my sibling. By the 12th of July we still hadn't heard about anything and I was starting to get worried.
"Chantelle is fine Sophia" Renesmee was reassuring me. I was pacing the front living room. Nessie's house was so big there were actually 3 living rooms, one was the family room, where the biggest TV was and where Nessie and Jake tended to watch TV, there was the kids room at the front of the house where their 6 kids could watch what they wanted and then there was the formal living room which no one entered unless there was special guests.
"A week ago it was breaking her bones. What's it doing now?" I asked.
"The baby will be aware of what he or she is doing now, they will be trying not to hurt your mother" she said emphasising 'baby' after I called the baby 'it'
"How do you know?" I asked. "I only remember my birth not being in the womb"
"My dad can read the mind of the baby, he could read mine too, I knew I was hurting my mom so I tried to stop because I loved her. Your sibling will be doing the same. You did it with your mom and so did Sarah with me. It gets easier closer to the birth, even if the baby is bigger and more cramped" she explained.
"Why hasn't he or she been born yet?" I asked in frustration.
"Im sure you'll get to meet your sibling soon enough sweetheart" she tried to calm me but it was useless; only one person in the world could calm my thoughts and he was out running as a wolf.
"He'll be back soon" she said as if she heard my thoughts. I looked at her to see her watching the window, sadness in her voice. Maybe she was missing Jacob as much as I was missing William.
"This is stupid how do you do this?" I asked her in frustration, it was rather loud. She looked at me, her eyes wide.
"What?" she said in confusion.
"How can you be away from him? Its torture! I need him so much" I said and started sobbing towards the end. I fell to my knees and let myself cry out my longing. I felt her arms around me then and she stroked my hair.
"It's because you're emotional right now, you're worried for your mom and you're anxious to meet your sibling and you're worried about your future when you have children. You know he can comfort you and your body is longing for him right now. I understand that but you have to believe me it gets easier" she said then chuckled at the end. I looked up from my hands; I saw her eyes stare into mine intensely. Then it hit me. Really looking at Nessie's face, at first I thought she projected it but I knew she'd been lying to me, maybe not purposely but it never got easier being away from him.
"You're wrong" I told her softly. Her face dropped and she frowned in confusion. She wasn't expecting me to say that. "I don't think it gets easier, I can see in your face how much you miss Jacob, and I see when you're around him how you move with him, it's incredible to watch you together, I never really noticed it before now but living with you this past month ive taken so much more attention to you and Jake, you're not like my parents, ive seen my parents together all my life, I know they're in love, they love each other a lot but it's different than watching an imprinted couple, it's like you're one when you're together. I don't think it's easier for you than it is for me, you just know how to cover your pain now, it seems easier to you because you've had to say goodbye to him so many times, you're used to it to an extent and you have to keep going for your children.
It's not healthy to want him this much you know, you wanting Jake and me wanting Will. Imprints may be magical but they suck" I said and pouted my lips slightly as I said the last word. Nessie laughed at me slightly but then knelt down next to me, keeping her arms around me, I lay my head on her shoulder and she kissed my head.
"I think you're right, I miss him but I know I have to keep going" she admitted in a whisper. "And yes, they suck I agree" she giggled. I smiled; my head still on her shoulder as she hugged me from the side.
"At least we have each other right?" I laughed. She kissed my hair.
"Always" she said just as the house phone rang. I leapt up from my position and saw the caller ID said 'Edward'. I answered it.
"Is she ok?" I asked immediately. Edward chuckled.
"Sophia, your mother is perfectly fine; you have a baby brother, would you like to come meet him?" he asked. I squealed happily.
I finally had my younger sibling. I swore at that moment I'd go to the ends of the earth to protect my brother. I would be the best sister I could possibly be to him because even though I hadn't met him yet I already loved him so much.
"On my way" I told him before hanging up and running for the door.
Sorry for the cliff hanger. You'll meet Matthew in the next chapter. Ive got so many exciting things coming up for this story. Thank you to those that are still with me. Im going to try and update a little bit more often, I might shorten the chapters but I'll get them out quicker from now on. My last exam is on Tuesday then im done!
I just want to explain why i really chose the name Matthew for Chantelle's son.
I've wanted to introduce a character named 'Matthew Cullen' for a while but never managed to work it into my story until now. One of my best friends, half-brother is called Matthew Cullen... and yes that really is his real last name which is why i felt so compelled to include him in my own version of the Cullen family. He was diagnosed with leukaemia in 2008. My friend has read my stories since the very beginning of Childhood story and I wanted to make this tribute to her for sticking with me for so long despite the fact of her troubles at home.