okay soooo this chappie is like kinda describing more about kagomes thoughts afterall she is a veteran of war being forced into another and without anyone of whom she once loved k? kay and yeah imma tell u rn but this story definitely is gonna have darker undertones- like the last chapter. i could barely write it, but its an important piece of like why Kagome is the way she is so fuk yah.

Previously on Blade of the Broken:

Kagome's eyes jolted open her head flicking up, eyes fearful and teary. A wide awake Sasuke stared down at a frightened Kagome, his nose touching hers. Both parties blushed, scrambling to get away, only ending up in Sasuke on top of Kagome. Immediately, Kagome was reminded of her past long ago, and had to restrain herself from stabbing the boy with one of her weapons. Kagome shoved the boy off of her, wanting to put as much distance between them as possible and slightly nauseous due to her almost-memory of her time within Naraku's captivity. She took to the bathroom, whereas Sasuke to the other side of the room.

Entering the bathroom, face pale, Kagome knew that this was the beginning of a long day to come.

Presently:

Kagome took a few calming breaths in hopes of dispelling some of the residual emotions from her nightmare. Her nightmare clung to her like a thick veil of despair. It made sense, what Naraku had been saying. Kagome was the constant amidst the chaos and destruction. If it weren't for her everyone would have led fairly normal lives, but because of her existence Kagome had ruined theirs, and in return, she received nothing but love and companionship. Was her life really worth all those lost? Closing her eyes, she took one last calming breath before she decided to wash her face. She'd save her shower for later after the sweat and dirtiness that followed after training.

Grabbing her facial cleanser, Kagome made quick work of scrubbing her face and rinsing it. Afterwards, her skin felt refreshed and almost like there was a cool whisper of air caressing her face. It was just the pick-me-up she needed to begin the day, all the sweat and grime from the battle free of her skins surface, as well as whatever sweat had been produced from her nightmare.

Shoving those thoughts aside, Kagome swiped on some deodorant and brushed her teeth. She took a step back and gazed at her reflection. There were a billion things wrong with her, flaw upon flaw distorting her body. Inuyasha may not have realized it, but he had broken her in more ways than her heart. He had killed her self-esteem, and now all she could see in the mirror was a being created of imperfections and impurities.

"Wench!"

"Whore!"

"Slut!"

"You're so fat, woman!"

"Disgusting!"

"Stupid!"

"You will never be like Kikyo!"

She knew that she shouldn't have let his words get to her, after all, he did end up turning on them in the end; but does that really stop the pain? No. His constant comparisons between Kikyo and herself had weathered her, eroded her confidence and much of her self-love. The man had constantly attacked her verbally and mentally. He always told her she wasn't good enough, and some days, Kagome couldn't help but agree. Had she been enough, wouldn't so many of her comrades be alive and well? If she was enough, wouldn't she have outshone her incarnation? If she was enough, wouldn't Inuyasha have loved her the same that she had him so long ago? Besides, with the things that she had done, that she had experienced, it was hard not to be revolted with herself. Kagome had never encountered a lack of confidence when it came to herself prior to the feudal era, but a lot had happened to her, and now she dealt with dysphoria on a daily basis.

With one last fleeting glance at the mirror, Kagome exited the bathroom, all the while shoving her hair into a bun, the braid Sakura had procured having come slightly loose as she slept and it too much of a hassle to keep down as she trained. A snap resounded in the warm summer air. Another hair tie lost. Bitterly she glared at the remains of the once functioning hair tie, its frayed ends staring gloatingly at her. Thankfully it wasn't her last one, for she owned an arsenal of hair ties. The snap was loud enough to have caused Sakura to sleepily gaze out of their room, her own hair in disarray, a long but quiet yawn escaping her petal pink lips.

Kagome nodded her head in greeting at the half-awake girl but to no avail, the girl continued her yawn as she too threw her rats nest of hair into a bun. With that reminder, Kagome grabbed another hair tie and finally accomplished her task.

Breakfast was a quiet affair, everyone rather sleepy and too caught up into their own worlds to notice that Kagome hadn't eaten. Silence reigned over the young genin as they followed Kakashi to the forest where they would train. An almost awkward tension settled between Kagome and Sasuke (the latter of which seemed to be a bit accusatory whenever his eyes fell upon the former's person), which made Naruto snicker quietly to himself and earned a questioning glance from Sakura, who would then assume he was crazy and look to their instructor for help.

It was a rather strange and awkward cycle of exchanged glances and soft snickers.

Finally, they made it to a clearing where Kakashi suddenly stopped and turned to his students. He began talking, but Kagome ignored him and thought about the past.

'I wonder how Sessh is doing with his daughter.

Does time pass differently between here and there?

How long has it been since I've left?

Has everyone forgotten me?

Is my family okay? Oh, that's right. Naraku slaughtered them, because of me. Everything is my fault.' Her thoughts swirled around in her mind constantly moving from one to another. There were so many things she left behind in the past, and too many questions were left unanswered. So many things that she had left broken. She was hurricane Kagome, the girl who could destroy all who crossed her path. Eyes closed, she prodded at the barrier between her and Sesshomaru. Even if she broke it, would it work between the two worlds?

Expelling a breath of air, she opened dull eyes to find Kakashi motioning at a tree, "-easy. Just do it like this." Kakashi then limped up said tree as though he wasn't defying the laws of gravity. A cheeky grin was slightly visible through his mask as he hung upside down for his students to see. "Now, get to work!"

Kagome did a quick once over of the tree and the kunai that sat at her feet. Grabbing it, she noticed Sakura was already making her way up the tree. Taking that as a cue, Kagome channeled her chakra to her feet, but as she lifted her foot she retracted some as if to be cautious to not harm the tree. Her decision proved right as she easily made her way up the trunk of the ancient tree.

A soft smile graced her features as she stealthily made her way to the top of the tree, enjoying the view and clear air. The presence of life floated all around her, from the gentle hum of the insects to the sweet calls of the birds; the treetops a vivid viridian green and the soft sunlit air surrounded her form. It reminded her of when Sesshomaru gave her the honor of riding upon his back, and the feel of the wind as he ran, the worries of the world tugged away by the wind and earth. Damn, she missed him, gorgeous beast form and all.

Sighing, she hopped down from her rather reminiscent spot on the branches. The wind streaked past her as she fell and she relished in it, enjoying the slight tinge of adrenaline it brought her. With a few front flips she landed gracefully on her feet, "Kakashi-sensei I'm finished."

"Ah, good Kagome. You can just rest for the rest of the day, I think those two are going to be awhile. You might as well join Sakura at the house." Nodding in response, she ran from the clearing and in the direction of the house. The woods were quiet and the lush green of the forest was a soothing reminder of her past life, pointing at the better times when war was nothing but a child's game and she was part an unbeatable group of her wanderlust friends. But nothing lasted forever, and that was something she knew in great detail.

With the past in mind, she suddenly veered left in her running. Long legs took off into the wilderness as slight feet made little noise as it came in contact with the earth. Morning dew clung to her boot-clad feet and the foliage of the trees helped keep her cool. Thoughtlessly she sprinted up the length of a tree, and hopped onto its highest branch. She took a calming breath and admired the forest around her.

The air was crisp and the sky was the same blue that graced the feudal era, which was much unlike the gray skies of her polluted future. Creeks rushed throughout the forest in a spastic manner as they sloshed against the earth of which they'd cut. A breeze flew swift and silent throughout the area, a sweet familiar caress against her face. Eyes closed she leaned into it, as though she were feeling the hand of someone dear against her face.

Her face suddenly grew stony, she didn't deserve such peace, such beauty. This was a landscape of purity and enlightenment, yet here she stood, a revolting mistake on the gorgeous landscape. All her misdoings, all the death, everything was her fault. Everything led to her. She was a miko, someone of unrivaled purity, yet she was probably the dirtiest person alive; all she brought was death and devastation to the world around her. If it weren't for her existence, at any world, life would be abundant. She truly was a shi motarasu tenshi.

A long drag of air escaped her mouth, her long lashes gently brushing against her face.

Then she jumped.