A.N. Sorry for my lack of updating! There was a problem with my fanfic account and I wasn't able to publish for 2 weeks…but here it is the new chapter and I hope you enjoy it! Review after reading! Thanks and have fun! :*
Chapter 8
"Cows, Mamma Mia and First Kiss"
Edward's POV
I woke up from the alarm clock. It was the first day of school after the Christmas holidays. After I ruined the dinner, Bella came to the rescue and called the Hales and the Blacks so we had one BIG Christmas party! I'll always be grateful for what she did, because I wouldn't be able to look at my mother's sadness over the disastrous turkey and acidic cookies.
"Bella! Sweetie wake up or you'll be late for school!" Bella's mom, Rene called me.
"Coming!" I called back. I quickly dressed up and went downstairs to have breakfast. The ordinary morning routine passed and soon enough we were on our way to school. No matter my whining, I still had to drive that junk – Bella's red old truck!
"I told Bella to buy a new car but she refused. She said the truck has personality! Yeah, personality my ass!" Angel murmured.
"Well she really should buy a new one because this one is falling apart!" I said while glancing into the rear-view mirror as yet another "unneeded" part fell from underneath the truck. I wasn't quite the mechanic but I was absolutely sure that it wasn't good when the car starts loosing parts!
Bum…puff…
"What the hell?" I yelled when the car started fuming and stopped.
"Oh just great!" Angel huffed and sank into her seat. We were silent for a few moments until she broke it.
"Do you know how to fix it?" she asked.
"Um…no. You?" I asked.
"No" she answered and rolled her eyes.
"Well it can't be that hard" I told her optimistically while exiting the car.
"Yeah! You said the same about the cookies and the turkey!" she murmured while following me. We stood in front of the truck. Angel looked at me a bit unsure. I opened the car's bonnet and my eyes widened.
"So many wires!" I exclaimed.
"Duh! What did you expect – bushes?" Angel said sarcastically. I rolled my eyes.
"Let's get this over with!" I said while rolling up my sleeves.
After 20 minutes or 'repairing' and 'fixing' the truck…
"Ok…well let's try it" I told Angel.
"Fine" she murmured with a lack of enthusiasm while entering the truck.
"1, 2, 3" she counted and tried to start the engine but nothing happened. Angel hit the wheel and her head popped out of the window.
"It's not working! God if Jake was here he would of fixed it!" She yelled irritated. I knew I couldn't fix the car but I didn't admit it. Then an idea appeared in my mind.
"Angel! There is a downhill just over there! I can try pushing the car!" I said. She thought for a second.
"Ok" she nodded and I went behind the truck.
"I'll push and you try to start the engine!" I shouted and started pushing. But well, that didn't turn up to be as good of an idea as I thought! As soon as she tried to start the engine some black smoke came out of the exhaust and into my face. I chocked and started coughing. I couldn't see a damn thing!
"Shit! I'm blind!" I started shouting in panic while rubbing my eyes.
"Edward! Edward what happened? Oh holy cow!" Angel yelled as she saw me(I guessed because I couldn't actually see her!).
"God Edward I'm sorry!" Angel said and I could sense her hands trying to clean my hair from the dirt.
"It's ok. It wasn't your fault" I told her and tried to open my eyes. They burned as hell, full of tears but I could still see.
"Angel go in the car and let's try again!" I told her.
"But…" she tried to reason me.
"No buts! Now go and I'll close my eyes and push!" I said. She looked disapprovingly but obeyed and entered the truck. I started pushing again. I pushed, and pushed, and pushed…and suddenly the car started slowly to move on its own! 'We made it to the downhill!' I thought. Angel showed her head out of the window and smiled brightly.
"We did it! Yeah!" she yelled happily. And just then everything turned upside down. The car went down the hill by free style, really fast. I haven't thought about that option. Angel screamed and I ran behind the truck trying to catch up with it but it was just too far away.
"Edward! I can't stop the freaking monster!" Angel was screaming at the top of her lungs.
"Hold on!" I yelled back. Suddenly out of nowhere, a herd of cows appeared on the road, in front of the car. Angel hit the horn.
"Out of the way! Out of the way COW!!!" Ang yelled. It was like some sort of a freaking parody movie! There were the cows – running away from the truck, and then there was the truck that couldn't stop and finally ME – chasing the truck in the deep mud on heels! Everything was in pure chaos – the cows were making strange sounds, Angel was hitting the horn and I was yelling behind it. I don't know what exactly happened in some moment but suddenly the car's engine growled and Angel finally stopped the goddamned car, the cows had stopped too! But to my "luck" as I tried to stop myself I slipped on the mud, breaking one of my high heels, fell and stated sliding down to where the truck was!
"Oh holly shit!" I yelled and as I came near the truck I closed my eyes and waited the hit! But it never came so I opened my eyes just to be able to see how I passed underneath the truck and on the other side. Thank heavens the truck had huge tires! My relief was just for seconds because I found myself sliding towards the now steady cows!
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" I screamed and once AGAIN closed my eyes. With a slight hit I suddenly stopped. As I opened my eyes I saw that I was laying under something. Then it hit me! 'FUCK! I am under A COW!' I thought panicked.
"Edward don't move and don't make any noise!" Angel murmured. But I was too panicked to listen to her, but I should have!
"Shit! Get me out of here!" I yelled and tried to escape but the evil devil cow had plans on her own for me! Firstly she hit me with her tail and I was supine on the ground. Secondly she looked at me and made that horrifying creepy sound – Muuuuuuu. And finally did the thing that made me have no regrets for eating beef! She shit on me!!! Angel beamed and her laughter echoed through the forest nearby. I slowly sneaked out from underneath the cow and stood up. The cow's poo was heavy, unpleasantly warm and extremely stinky on my chest! Angel laughed even harder. After a few moments she was about to tell me something but I cut her off.
"Don't even try!" I warned her, which brought another wave of laughter. 'God! Save me!'
Bella's POV
"Where are they?" Jacob whined. We were waiting for Angel and Edward to come, but they were late for 25 minutes now! Then we heard the loud roar of my truck, driven by Edward. I knew he hated driving it but he had no other choice. When they got out Angel was chocking.
"Angel are you ok?" I asked concerned. She just pointed to Edward who by the way had a HUGE spot on his t-shirt and black all over his face and hair. And then the SMELL hit my nose!
"What on Earth is that dreadful stink?!" Emmett asked disgusted.
"He was…" Angel started but Edward growled.
"I had an accident!" he hissed and made his way towards the school but I knew he was going straight to the girls changing room. As soon as he was out of sight we made Angel tell us the WHOLE dirty story.
"Ok fine! I'll tell you!" she hissed. She took a deep breath.
"A cow shit on him!"she whispered. At first the shock kept us frozen but after a few seconds the laughter started and it didn't end until we were rolling on the parking yard, our stomachs aching.
"Oh God, why did I have to tell you!?" Angel moaned and slapped her forehead.
"I'm so gonna joke with him forever!" Emmett said through laughter.
"Don't please!" Angel begged.
"No way!" Jacob said.
"There is no way in Hell, Earth or Heave we'll forget this!" Rose and Alice told her, as we made our way towards the school building.
"I am so dead!" I heard my sister whine behind us.
Edward's POV
I was sooo gonna kill Angel for telling them about the 'cow accident'! Whole day long I was the center and main target of Emmett's and Jacob's mockery. They didn't stop when we got home either. Emmett and Jacob even played a "scene"! Jacob lay on the floor, under two chairs and Emmett, sitting on the top of the chairs, yelled: 'Look I am a cow and I use Edward as my personal toilet!' I growled at them and then Bella – my savior, came to the rescue!
"Ok guys I think that's enough!" she finally said.
"Gee Bella! You're killing the fun!" Jacob whined. She just rolled her eyes.
"I'll be right back" Emmett announced and disappeared up the stairs. We talked for a little while, Jacob teased me every two minutes.
"Let's go to Carlisle's office 'cause I want to show you something" Bella told us. We made our way towards the second floor. As we passed by the toilet we heard some noise coming from there.
"Shhh. Wait! Listen!" I said and we were all silent. Someone was SINGING in the toilet.
Mamma Mia I've got diarrhea,
Plip plop can you hear my poo drop!
It was…EMMETT!
"OH. MY. GOD!" Rose whispered terrified.
"Was that…?" Alice asked. And then we heard the flash of water. Emmett washed his hands and after a couple of seconds the lock of the door turned and it flew open. The moment we saw Emmett and the hellish smell washed over us, the laughing started.
"What?!" Emmett asked as red as a tomato.
"You…toilet…song…God…Mamma Mia…" Seth tired but couldn't make a proper sentence and that only made us laugh even more.
"Idiots!" Emmett murmured and went to his room.
"Should we…try to talk to him?" Bella asked, tears from laugher filling her eyes.
"No" I said while yet another wave of laugher came out of everyone.
Bella's POV
God! Today was full of laughing and embarrassing situations. After laughing over Edward's 'cow accident', we laughed at Emmett's toilet singing. But in the end, after Emmett and Edward made a treaty not to speak about this day ever again, we sat in the living room and watched TV. We were watching some romance movie that Alice had chosen.
"God! Why didn't I think of it earlier?! It could actually work!" Alice suddenly yelled, standing up.
"What's wrong?" Jasper asked her.
"No, nothing's wrong! In fact I have an idea! Emmett, Jasper come for a second!" she said. The three of them left the room only to return 5 minutes later. Em had a smug smirk on his face but Jasper looked somehow disapprovingly.
"Edward come for a second" Emmett said. He shrugged but stood up and followed them.
"Sooo Bella…what's up?" Alice asked me while sitting beside me. I looked at her questionly as did Rose, Angel, Jacob and Seth.
"Cut the bullshit Alice! What are you up to?" I asked her straight away without any shilly-shallying.
"Who? Me? Nothing!" she said innocently. Innocent my foot!
"Fine! I'll bite" I told her. We sat like that in silence until Em came back and took Jacob and Seth with him. When they came back again, both Jake and Seth had the same evil smile just like Emmett.
"Bella! You know I found a book in dad's office that I am 100% sure you haven't read!" Em said. 'I doubt that!' I thought but decided to play along.
"Ok, let's go check it out!" I said and followed them. I could tell that as soon as I left the room Alice started telling something to Ang and Rose. 'What the hell is she up to?!' I thought. We made our way up the stairs, the boys in front of me and the girls right behind me. Suddenly Em, Jake and Seth stopped right in front of the bathroom. I looked at them puzzled.
"Em this is not Carlisle's office" I told him.
"Yes, you are right" he said and grabbed me.
"Emmett!" I yelled.
"Sorry Bella!" Jasper apologized while opening the door. Emmett threw me and locked the door. I stood up from the floor where he had thrown me and started punching the door and shouting.
"Emmett! Open the freaking door you idiot! It's not funny!" I yelled. I suddenly heard a noise behind me and when I turned around I saw…EDWARD! He was sitting in the bath tub, his hands handcuffed to the faucet, a towel in his mouth. He was struggling to get free.
"Wait! I'll help you" I told him. After taking the towel out of his mouth I sat on the edge of the tub.
"The key is on the sink" he said and I went to take it. As soon as his hands were free we were both yelling and punching the door.
"Let us out!" we shouted.
"Well I am truly sorry but you'll get up when you accomplish everything I say!" Alice said from the other side of the door. My blood boiled in my veins – that evil little pixy!
"Alice! I knew it was your idea!" we both yelled at the same time.
"Oh come on! Don't be mad, I am just trying to help you guys!" she said.
"And how could the fact that we are locked in the freaking bathroom possibly help us?!" I shouted with acidic voice.
"Well you actually haven't heard my plan yet! Now if you SHUT UP I will explain!" she shouted back irritated. I was about to yell again when Edward took a hold of my mouth with his hand. I looked at him raising an eyebrow.
"Arth yo wit hrth?" I murmured against his hand.
"No, I am not with her, but if you don't let her explain God knows how long we are gonna have to stay here!" he said. I thought for a second and nodded irritated. He smiled satisfied – ASSHOLE!
"Ok Alice we are listening" Edward said.
"You Bella?" she asked. Urgh! Annoying little pixy!
"Just spill it already!" I hissed.
"Fine!" she hissed back. Silence fell over us and my patience was getting smaller and smaller with every minute now.
"Ok guys you ready?" Alice barely asked.
"Alice if I listen any harder I will turn into an elephant ear so…just shoot!" I said. She sighted.
"Ok, well while watching the movie, especially the kissing part…something clicked in my mind" Alice said and I could hear Emmett fighting down his laughter. 'What The Fuck?!' I thought.
"And what has the kissing scene have to do anything with us being locked in here?" Edward asked puzzled.
"For Christ's sake! You tried everything you and the gang had in mind! Everything on that stupid list except…" I cut her off as soon as the light bulb in my head came to life.
"NO! You wouldn't!" I yelled, smashing my fist against the door.
"Why not? That could actually work, don't you think so?" Alice asked.
"Definitely no!" I shouted.
"I told you they wouldn't agree!" Jasper murmured to Alice.
"Could somebody please, in the name of God, tell me what's going on?!" Edward growled next to me.
"Alice wants…" but Alice interrupted.
"I want you to KISS each other!" she squealed. His eyes widened and his jaw dropped open. I even thought he stopped breathing.
"Edward are you…?" I asked but then Edward exploded.
"Fuck you Alice! Are you insane for God's sake?! You are completely out of your mind if you think I'm gonna kiss Bella!" he growled.
"And why not? Is she so repulsive to you?" Alice asked with acidic voice. I automatically turned to him and he was frozen. 'Answer her Edward!' I begged in my mind. To be truthful for the past couple of months, every time I spoke to Edward I felt something in my chest…and his body…
"No" he whispered.
"What?" Alice asked.
"No, she's not repulsive but…" he trailed off.
"But what?" Emmett interrupted.
"It's…strange! Kissing my own…oh you know!" he murmured blushing. Oh he looked so cute while blushing…Wait! What?! 'I think you have the swine flu Isabella!' I told myself.
"If you put it that way…yeah…it would be gross!" Jacob said.
"That's the final thing we could try to switch your bodies" Rose murmured.
"Listen to the Bella! Please sis" Angel murmured. 'No, I can't! This is wrong!'
"Fine!" I barely heard Edward say.
"Really?" everyone from the other side exclaimed.
"You are kidding right?" I asked mortified.
"I am not kidding! We have to try it" Edward said suddenly moving closer to me. I backed up.
"Edward! Don't!" I begged.
"Why Bella? Am I so disgusting to you?" he asked. By the time I had stopped, my back facing the wall. Edward had stopped too just a few inches away from me.
"No, but…" I started but couldn't finish. Edward had closed the little distance between us and kissed me. First I tried to push him away but just after a second I gave up AND kissed him in return! I felt an electric jolt circling my whole body, from the hair on my head to my toes. It was as if a huge tornado was blustering freely inside me. My head was feeling dazzled and my legs became numb. Edward deepened our kiss, taking my neck between his hands and I embraced his waist(since my old body was shorter). As our tongues fought for dominance the whole world disappeared and it was only me and Edward in the universe. I somewhat felt…complete?!
"I can't hear a thing!" I barely heard Alice murmur.
"Do you think they…died?!" Emmett asked frantic.
"No way!" Angel breathed and there was a noise coming from where the door was but I just didn't care! All I was aware of was that no one had ever kissed me like Edward did. In a second the door burst open.
"Holy cow!" Angel yelled.
"Edward I told you to KISS her, not EAT her alive!" Alice shouted. We suddenly let go of each other, red as tomatoes from embarrassment and out of breath.
"Well…did it work?" Jacob asked. I looked at Edward and he was still in my body…so NO! God I was gonna be stuck in a boy's body forever!!!
"No, it didn't" we both mumbled.
"Shit! I was sure it was going to work!" Alice cursed.
"I…um…gonna go!" Edward babbled and ran out of the bathroom with inhuman speed as if his life depended on that!
"See you guy tomorrow!" Angel said and after a sympathetic look at me turned on her heels and ran after Edward. Everyone else was looking at me. I blushed even more.
"I…need to sleep!" I quickly told them and sprinted to my room. I locked the door and laid on my bed. I put a pillow on top of my head, trying desperately to silence the shouting voice in my head which sang: Bella loves Edward! over and over again!
A.N. Well here it is guys! I hope you enjoy it and well review so I can write again soon! Luv ya bb