Chapter X

No Return

By Neko Erza

Natsu ran as fast as he could. His lungs screamed in protest, desperately needing a break and decent air supply. He made his way through town at amazing speed. People yelled at him irritated as he bumped into them, his vision too blurred with tears to clearly see where he was going.

He wanted to put as much distance between himself and the guild as possible, but he was still close enough to hear the bloodcurdling cry. It felt like his head was going to split in two when he heard Mira's scream echo all the way from the other side of town. Nobody around him seemed to have heard it though, as they just continued with their normal lives, but Natsu could hear it all too clear. The scream kept ringing in his ears even after it had died out. He pushed himself to run even faster.

He had never run this fast in his entire live, but then again; neither had he ever been so afraid of something. Sudden realization struck his mind: Gray must have felt this desperate, if not more, when he had been running away from him. The raven must have pushed himself to his utter limit trying to escape from him. Natsu's stomach gave a sickening lurch. He had hunted Gray down like he was nothing more than an animal.
He was mortified about what he had done to Gray. And what he had done to the guild, because if one Fairy Tail member suffered, everyone suffered along.

They had found Gray. They had found him and they would find out that he had been the one that did this to him. They would all despise him and Natsu couldn't blame them if they did.

The pinkette finally reached the edge of the town and left the populated area. He ran over the forestry path that lead to Happy and his home. He knew the little blue cat wasn't back from his trip with Wendy and Charle yet, since he couldn't pick up a recent scent-trail of him.

Good. The dragon slayer thought bitterly. Encountering Happy would only make this ten times more difficult and it already was nearly impossible for him to do.

He halted on the doorstep of his house, and rested his head against the door. His lungs felt like someone was pouring acid into them from the long and tiring run.

His fist hit the door hard, leaving a deep crack in the wood. Tears streamed down his face non-stop and a loud, frustrated cry erupted from his throat.

How could this have happened? The question kept on playing in his head. He had always thought of his magic as something to be proud off. He had learned it from Igneel, so it was something to be treasured, just like his scarf.

I hate it!

Natsu felt disgusted with his own magic. The dragon that slept inside of him because of the magic had caused all this. He had been misled all these years. Dragon slayer magic was nothing to be proud of, but something to fear. He no longer doubted why it was a lost magic.

Natsu opened his eyes and stared blankly at the door. Only after a while he noticed that he was clutching something in his hand. He could feel it pricking into his flesh. He unclenched his fist and looked at the small object in his hand.

It was Gray's cross-necklace.

He had already forgotten that he had taken it from the raven right before leaving him at the steps of Fairy Tail. He didn't know why he brought it along, since it didn't belong to him, it wasn't his to take. He stared at the jewelry. The once nicely shining metal was now stained with blood. Gray had always loved it and Natsu had used it to stab it into his flesh.

'He will be better off not being reminded of it', Natsu said to himself, but still he felt despicable for taking it without a second thought.

The pinkette hung it around his neck to make sure he wouldn't lose it, before he kicked the door open and started collecting stuff to take along with him. He stuffed as much as possible into a backpack. When he went to the bathroom to get some more things however, he stopped dead in his tracks as he passed the mirror.

Natsu stared at himself in tremendous disgust. His whole face was covered in splattered blood and a faint scaly pattern was still visible at some places. He frantically started rubbing the crimson spots, trying to get them off, but they didn't. Natsu quickly turned on the faucet and tried to wash everything away as fast as possible. He skin was turning red from the harsh rubbing, but still he didn't stop. After his whole skin was scrubbed flaming red, he ripped off his bloodied clothes. He threw them aside disgusted.

He quickly grabbed other clothes and pulled them on before grabbing his bag and storming at the door again. He looked back one last time.

He didn't want to leave this behind.

He didn't want to leave Happy.

He didn't want to leave Fairy Tail.

But he didn't deserve to be able to stay here. He lost all his right to call it his home the moment he turned himself against his nakama.

He stepped over the threshold and pulled the door close behind him. He told himself that he couldn't stay, but the truth also was that he was afraid to stay. He wouldn't be able to bear the sight of his nakama looking at him in disgust and hate.

Natsu despised himself for being so weak and selfish. He was leaving behind his family, but most important of all… he was leaving behind his mate.

And it was all because he was too much of a coward to face what he deserved. He deserved all the wrath of his fellow members and to be thrown out of the guild. He didn't want to see them in pain or see them loathe him. For what he had done, they probably would want to lock him in jail and Natsu couldn't deny that was where he belonged.

Tears burned their way down his cheeks as he took a resolute step forward.

This was the last time he'd ever set foot in Magnolia.

Mira's scream resonated through the whole guild.

People everywhere jumped to their feet. Some of them took on their battle stance, expecting intruders to fight. But nobody came in. It was just Mirajane standing frozen in the doorway.

People ran over to her, but stopped abruptly when they saw what it was that had left her so frightened.

Gasps and cries emerged from everywhere in the crowd. Everybody stood frozen for a few moment, unable to comprehend what was in front of them. Finally Mirajane was the first to move.

"Gray!" She dropped to her knees beside the bloody body. Tears ran uncontrollably over her face as she didn't know what to do. She didn't dare touch the mutilated skin, afraid to do even more damage. Her fingers ghosted a few centimetres over his body where they trembled uncontrollably . Finally she carefully pressed her fingers against his throat, just enough to normally feel a heartbeat.

Everybody looked at her expectantly, many with tears in their eyes or stifling sobs. The white haired girl quickly pulled back her hand and looked up at the rest of the members.

"I can't feel it." She managed to bring out right before she burst out in a flood of sobs.

"Is he…?"

"He's dead!"

"He can't be dead!"

The words rose up from everywhere among them. More gasps , sobs and cries sounded from the crowd. They were all frozen to their spot, except for Levi. She managed to keep her head cool, even though she was shaken and tears ran down her face. She stepped forward.

"W-we have to get him inside, quickly. Somebody warn the master." The little bluenette said, trying to keep her voice steady.

Jet immediately bolted up the stairs to go to master Makarov's office, while Elfman carefully stepped closer towards Gray's body. He bent down and very carefully lifted the limp body off the floor. The large white haired man flinched when Gray's right leg fell into an utterly unnatural position.

"Call Wendy!" Lucy yelled.

"She's not back yet." Lisanna sobbed as she looked at the raven in her brother's arms.

Everybody quickly stepped aside to let the white haired man through as Elfman hurried inside, not at all keen to feel the limp, bloody body in his arms. He gently placed him on the table. The raven's leg still lay weirdly angled, but everybody seemed afraid to touch the heavily wounded body. Groups of people kept aside, unsure what to do.

"He's even colder than normal…" Elfman whispered.

A few seconds later the master ran down the stairs followed by Jet. A few people looked surprised as the Speed mage ran at full speed out of the guild.

Everybody made way to let the master pass and Mirajane pulled out a chair for him to stand on. The little man immediately jumped on it. His face had already been strained with anger, but after seeing Gray's body it was pure fury. He took some deep breathes to calm himself down. He looked up as he heard some of the murmuring in the crowd.

"Gray can't be dead…"

"Look at all those horrible wounds…"

"But Mira felt no pulse…" The whispers and sobs sounded.

"Calm down everyone!" The master told them in a stern voice, before he leaned over. He placed his small fingers against the raven's throat and closed his eyes.

The Fairy Tail members could see him move his fingers ever so slightly. After awhile he opened his eyes again and removed his fingers.

"He's alive, but just barely." Makarov said.

"B-but I couldn't…" Mira said as tears continued to run down her face.

"He's an ice mage, his heart beats slower than normal to keep his body cool, and your hands are trembling quite heavily which makes it only harder to locate it. His heartbeat is very hesitant, but it's still there." The tiny man seemed to look older than he had ever done. "I sent Jet to go and get Porlyusica. Hopefully Wendy will be back soon so she can tend to him as well."

"We need to do something now, we need to nurse him! If we don't-" Cana shouted.

"Calm down." Makarov interrupted. "These wounds are too severe. Wendy is the only real Healer we have in our guild and she's not here. Doing something now might do more bad than good with wounds of this severity. We'll have to wait for Porlyusica-san."

"I'll go and prepare the infirmary." Mira offered. If the infirmary was ready at least they could transport Gray into a bit more rest and quiet. Before she left, the white haired girl had taken a jacket and rolled it up to made a pillow for the raven, trying to at least make it a bit more comfortable.

Makarov turned towards Lucy. "Where did you find him?"

But before she could answer there was a sudden burst of light next to her as Loke materialized from the spirit world. He looked alarmed and immediately turned to his owner to see tears falling down her face. "Lucy! What's wrong? I sensed there was something…"

"G-Gray." Was all the blonde managed to bring out through her sobs. To make clear what she meant she pointed to the table the raven's body lay on.

The spirit immediately turned around and faced the horrible sight. All colour drained from his face and his stomach gave an unpleasant lurch.

"W-who…" The spirit's voice trembled with rage. "Who did this?" He turned around and stared at the rest of the guild. Tears welled up in his eyes but he refused to let them go. "Who the fuck did this?!"

Lucy let out a loud sob and some people even backed away from the spirit. Everybody knew Loke was Gray's best friend and they also knew the Lion had quite the fierce temper.

"Loke, calm down." Makarov said softly, but stern. "We know just as much as you do." The old man turned around at Lucy again. "Where did you find him?"

"Th-there was a k-knock on th-the door and G-Gray was j-j-just lying there." The blonde sobbed, trying to wipe away all of her tears.

"He had been gone for a while already, if I remember correctly. Do you know where he went?"

"H-he went f-fishing with N-Natsu at L-lake Hakobe." Her eyes went big at the mention of the dragon slayer's name. "Wh-where's Natsu?"

The master turned towards Erza and Lisanna. "Lisanna, Erza, I want you to go there and look for Natsu. Something might have happened to him too. See if you can find anything."

"W-what kind of Mm-monster could do something like this?" Lucy asked, still fruitlessly trying to wipe away all her tears. Loke stepped closer and wrapped his arms around her in comfort, but his expression was still furious.

Master Makarov watched the motionless body of the ice mage with a gloom expression. He inspected the wounds that weren't covered by the raven's clothes. But one certain wound caught his attention.

"Ji-san?" Loke asked as he saw the old man's expression change. "What's wrong?"

"This wound…" He whispered so only Loke could hear him. He pointed to a wound on Gray's forehead. "It's been burned close."

The spirit let go of the sobbing blonde and moved a little closer to the master. "You think Natsu was with him when he got the wounds?" The orange haired mage looked a little closer at the cauterised cut. "It looks pretty deep, he might have tried to make it stop bleeding."

"Yeah." The old man nodded, but the look of worry didn't leave his face.

"We need to find Natsu quickly. He might be in the same shape as Gray." Loke said.

"Let's hope Erza and Lisanna will be back soon. In the meantime all we can do is wait for Porlyusica to come and heal him. We sent Jet to go and get her."

"I hope they're back soon." Loke felt helpless. He had the feeling he needed to punch something, but at the same time he didn't want to leave his friend's side. "If they'll stay away too long, I'm not sure he's gonna… if he's…" If he's gonna survive it. The spirit couldn't finish the sentence. He was too afraid to finish it, but still there was no denying; Gray was more dead than alive.

"Gray is very strong. He'll hang in there." The master said, but he couldn't block out all the worry in his voice. "Porlyusica will be here in a short while and then sh-"

The old man stopped talking when cries erupted from between the grouped guild members.

"Hey! Watch out!"

"Don't push!"

"What are you-?"

They all looked surprised as a person roughly made his way through the crowd. Lucy could see people being pushed aside until the person finally reached them. Lucy, Loke and Makarov looked up in surprise to see that it was Bixlow.

And even with his visor still on, you could see there was a look off utter shock on his face. People looked at him questioningly; everybody had reacted shocked and they all were still sobbing for their nakama, but for Bixlow to only now respond was quite weird. He had been in the guild when they found him so it was quite late for this to be the first shock like Loke just had. And besides that, the look on his face was pure terror; he and Gray had never been that good friends so for Bixlow to react this extreme was quite surprising to most.

"Bixlow?" Makarov asked questioningly. The large mage didn't respond, his gaze fixed on the ice mage. The looks on the members' faces were becoming more confused as the seith mage stepped closer to the raven and removed his visor. Most members had never even seen him without it.

"Bixlow?" The master asked again, this time more demanding.

The Raijinshu member's eyes were glowing an acid green as his gaze stayed fixed on Gray, the look of terror and disbelief still etched on his face.

"He… Gray's…" Bixlow finally managed to bring out. "His… there's a part of his soul missing."

End of chapter X

I'm sorry it was such a short chapter, but I barely have any time to write. Normally I try to avoid posting something this short, but since a lot of people seemed to be freaking out about the end of last chapter I decided to upload as soon as possible. And since last chapter was way longer than normal I permitted myself to have a shorter one.

But as you see: Gray is still alive, if only just barely. I actually had two completely different storylines thought out and in one of them Gray did die, but in the end I decided to go with the one where he lived. Well, for now at least.

I don't know when I'll be able to upload next. I'm leaving on an international internship tomorrow that will last 3 months. I really have no idea if I'm going to be able to write much but I'll try as much as possible. Next chapter will definitely be longer. Thank you for reading.