So, here comes Chapter 10. Now, it has been brought to my attention that I have some spelling issues. I am fully aware of that, and I do try to keep my spelling errors as few as possible, but without a beta reader, it's just not possible for me to actually throw out all mistakes.
Each chapter takes me up to 5 hours. Most days, I come home from work and start typing right away.
If anyone would like to Beta for me, I'd be more than happy to accept that help.
Now, another thing that has been bothering me, and honestly makes me want to just say "Fuck it" and stop writing is a constant complaint that I receive in a private message that my story is all together too emotional.
To that, I can only say one thing: Don't like it? Don't fucking read it. You must have better things to do in your life than read a story you do not like.
That being said, Chapter 10: Enjoy.
6 months later
Jim sat on the floor in Spock's room, flipping through the pages of his text book. Spock was sitting on the couch, grading an exam from another class. They sat in silence, simply enjoying each other's company.
Jim's gaze traveled from the words on the page up to the Vulcan. Spock was sitting, ever unmoving, as his eyes read through the exam he had in his hands. If it hadn't been for the movements of his eyes, and his chest rising and falling from breathing, he could have been a beautiful statue.
"Jim, you are getting distracted." Spock stated. "You came here to study in a quiet environment. I would advise you to keep studying."
Jim grinned. "It's not my fault you're so damn distracting, T'hy'la." Kirk moved to sit next to the Vulcan, gently running his fingertips over the back of Spock's hand.
The Vulcan turned to face the human, giving him a disapproving look.
"Oh come on, Spock, don't give me that look. I just want to spend some time with you." Jim smiled, carefully taking his T'hy'la's hand into his. He loved how Spock's skin was so much hotter than his own, how it almost burned him. Almost.
"Jim, we spend time together every day." Spock's slender eyebrow arched in that cute little way Jim loved so much. "I do not see why you feel that the amount of time we spend together is not sufficient."
"Because, Spock. We do spend tons of time together but you know... When we do you're mostly doing some kind of work related thing or something like that, and I'm studying. Spending time together doesn't just mean to be in the same room you know?" Jim's fingertips trailed over Spock's palm, watching as Spock's breath hitched.
"T'hy'la." Spock sighed, pulling his hand back, placing it on his thigh firmly.
"Oh come on Spock. 6 months. It's been six months since you even kissed me." Jim frowned, tilting his head to the side. "Don't you want to kiss me?"
"Jim, this is not the time to discuss this issue. You must prepare for your exam tomorrow. I strongly advise you to go back to your studying." Spock simply said, turning back to him on task.
All he could do was admit his defeat and sit back down on the floor, lazily flipping through more pages of his book until he finally found the one he had been looking for before he had gotten distracted.
Many things had changed after that first, real kiss. Jim spent every evening with Spock. Most of the time, they were both going through some kind of papers, but every once in a while, they would actually talk.
Jim had never been so content in his life. Simply sitting next to Spock, feeling his heat, hearing him breath was so soothing that Jim felt instantly at home. And it didn't take very long for him to realize that yes; this was where he was supposed to be. Next to this man. This was where he belonged.
At first, Spock had not felt comfortable with the idea of going outside with Jim, to the city, or anywhere else. Jim had to whine, beg, and bitch about it until Spock finally gave in.
Jim knew that if he just asked often enough, and looked at him with those big, blue, puppy eyes, Spock would eventually break, and agree.
Their first day off campus together was a warm, windy Saturday. Jim couldn't stop grinning. Finally, he could spend a whole day with Spock, outside of his private rooms. Jim had kept his distance from Spock, hadn't touched him, just like the Vulcan had requested. Jim had understood why the Vulcan had made that request. If anyone found out that they were closer then Professor and Cadet should be, shit would hit the fan.
And still, Jim enjoyed himself. He had found a nice, vegetarian restaurant where they ate, both paying their own bill, because Spock insisted on it. Jim would have happily paid for both meals.
Jim had recently learned that he and Spock shared an interest... They both enjoyed antiques. So, on that first day, he and Spock visited every Antique Shop the city had. Jim's feet already hurt, but he honestly couldn't give a fuck. The way Spock handled those old treasures, how carefully he touched them and that soft glimmer in his eyes when he found something he liked. It made Jim smile. He was happy he had finally gotten Spock to leave campus. Because he was sure he wasn't the only one enjoying it now.
It became a routine. Every Saturday, Jim would pick the Vulcan up, and they would make their way to the city, to eat, talk, check the stores they frequented for some new things, and then finally sat down somewhere, Jim sipping on some coffee, Spock taking sips from a water bottle.
It had been the best summer of his life so far.
When Winter came, Jim decided that going to the city was going to have to wait until it was warmer again. The shock of seeing Spock in a hospital bed still ran deep, and he had promised himself to look after his T'hy'la better.
So, one day after class, he had purchased a Vulcan chess board that he had ordered, and also a few human card games. They could always sit and read in Spock's warm room, but every once in a while, they would sit down to a game of chess or cards, and though Jim had trouble beating Spock in those games, he did manage to win a game of chess once in a while.
When Jim had caught a bad cold, Spock turned into a mother hen. He came by Jim's room every day after his classes, bringing him food and medication, insisting that he help Jim wash himself. Though by helping, Spock hadn't meant actually helping him scrub down, but standing in the bathroom, facing away from Jim's naked body, ready to catch him if he fell.
He changed Jim's sheets everyday out of 'hygienic reasons'. Jim was pretty sure that Spock just couldn't stand the smell of sweat, and with the fever Jim was sporting, sweat seemed to always be dripping down his body.
After a especially hard night, when he had to wake Bones to give him a hypo for the fever raging through his body, and looking like a zombie when Spock came, the Vulcan decided to spend the night meditating next to his sick T'hy'la. Bones had tolerated it for two nights.
When Spock settled down for the third night, closing his eyes to meditate, the doctor had had enough.
He kindly informed the Vulcan that he was a Doctor, perfectly capable of looking after a man with a cold, and that there was no need for Spock to sit at Jim's bedside as if the human was about to take his last breaths. Spock had informed him in return that, while Bones was a doctor, he needed to sleep, and if something did happen, and Jim couldn't wake him, his medical expertise would be utterly useless.
Jim could only hold off Bones and his hypo, that the Doctor intended to knock the Vulcan out with and then personally drag him back to his own room by convincing Spock that he was already well enough to look after himself. His T'hy'la didn't like leaving him behind, but he did not argue.
Jim had a hard time falling asleep that night, missing the soft sound of Spock breathing. The only sound that filled the room now was Bones snoring.
Jim's birthday was never really important to the human, and since Vulcan's didn't celebrate their birthdays, Jim didn't expect anything from Spock. Not a gift, or a party, nothing really. He had prepared himself for a nice and quiet evening in Spock's rooms. But when he entered, a strange smell filled his nose.
Jim stepped in to find that Spock had set up a small table, with candles that where already lit, various little plates on it with food Jim had never seen before. He gave Spock a questioning look.
"You have always wished to know more about my planet, about my culture." Spock had said, motioning towards the table. "These are meals that are frequently served on Vulcan."
"Spock, I can't eat all of that." Jim grinned, his heart racing with excitement.
"I am fully aware of your stomach's capacity, Jim. However I was not sure which dish you would prefer, so I have prepared the ones I enjoy most in small portions, so that you may taste every one, and eat however much you please of whatever you please."
Jim couldn't stand it anymore. He gave in to his urges, walking over to Spock, pulling him into an embrace that was awkwardly returned.
"Happy Birthday, T'hy'la." Spock said, slowly pulling back from Jim, ushering him towards the plates. It was a firework of senses. The taste, the smell, everything was alien and familiar at the same time. Jim tasted everything, and finally decided for his favorite Vulcan meal. Spock had watched him with an amused glint in his eyes.
"Thanks Spock." Jim finally said as he was done eating. "This was definitely the best Birthday ever."
"It is not finished yet, Jim." Spock walked into his bedroom, returning with a square package, wrapped in simple blue wrapping paper. Jim's grin grew wider.
"You didn't have to do all this, you know. I mean I love it. And I am so happy. But just spending the evening with you would have been enough." the human said, gracefully accepting the gift.
"I am on earth. It is only logical that I take part in such rituals as a Birthday celebration." Spock answered, sitting down next to Jim. "Open it. I hope my choice in gift is satisfactory."
Jim slowly unwrapped the present, trying not to tear up the paper too much until he had uncovered a book. Jim's eyes almost fell out of their sockets. He was holding an antique book. His favorite book as a child. Peter Rabbit. Jim stared at the book in awe.
"How'd you get this?" he asked quietly.
"I received a significant amount of help from the Owner of the old book store you seem to enjoy greatly. He located this book, and arranged the transport to here." Spock tilted his head ever so slightly as he watched Jim stare at the book, his expression blank. "Is it not to your liking, Jim?" it wasn't until then that Spock noticed the tears.
"Spock. This is the most beautiful thing anyone has ever given me. In my entire life. Thank You. I love it." Jim whispered. He turned to look at Spock, wiping away his tears.
"Then I do not understand why you are crying." Spock said, giving Jim another confused look.
"Those are tears of joy, Spock. You made me so happy, I had to cry." Jim smiled, leaning over to press a kiss to Spock's cheek. "Thank you, T'hy'la."
But the evening wasn't over then.
There was a knock on the door, but Bones didn't wait for an invitation. He simply walked in.
"Should lock your door, Professor. There are bad people out there." Bones grinned. "Come on, Jim; pull on your shoes, Spock get a jacket its cold. We're going out for some fun."
Jim grinned at Bones, shooing him out of the room. He was pretty sure that, even if the Vulcan wasn't showing it, he was not pleased by the violation of his privacy.
"You don't have to go, Spock. I understand if you want to stay." Jim said.
"I will accompany you. There is a 86.34 chance of you and the Doctor indulging in excessive drinking, and will be highly intoxicated by the early hours of the day." Spock stood, grabbing a thick jacket and a pair of shoes.
"So. You're worried we'll be too drunk to get back to our dorm?" Jim was pulling his own shoes on.
"I do not worry, Jim. However, there is also a big possibility of you and the Doctor crossing harm's way in such a condition."
"Well, Spock, aren't you just a sweetheart."
The evening went just as Spock had predicted it. Even though Bones hit the bottle a lot harder then Jim had, Spock ended up throwing them over his shoulders and carrying him home.
Bones had giggled "So Jim, is this how you imagined getting so close to Spock's ass for the first time?"
And suddenly, the doctor's body slipped from Spock's shoulder, down the Vulcan's back. Only inches separated his face from the cold floor. Spock was holding onto Bones ankles, casually turning his head over his shoulder to look at the dangling body.
"Okay, Okay, Fine! I got the point Spock, inappropriate comment." Bones mumbled. "Now pull me back up." The answer he received was surprising to both of them.
"Doctor, as you have pointed out the proximity to my rear was inappropriate for anyone else but my T'hy'la. I will not let you fall. But I will also not pull you up."
"...Green blooded, pointy eared bastard." Bones groaned as he let his arms trail over the floor, cleaning the street below.
"Bones. You made your bed, lay in it." Jim giggled.
And even though he and Spock had grown so close, even though they spent so much time together, and finally admitted just how much they cared for each other, even though 6 months had passed. Spock still wouldn't kiss him. Or hold his hand like he had in the hospital.
He didn't even let Jim sleep over. Jim had tried everything in his power. He had asked nicely, he had begged, he had whined, he had bitched. He had acted like he had fallen asleep. But Spock did not budge. Jim ended up in his own room every night.
Whenever Jim tried to be more intimate with Spock, the Vulcan would gently reject him. But rejection was rejection, no matter how sweet. And at first, Jim had just pushed it away, thinking Spock just wasn't ready.
But now, Jim was getting a little uneasy. As he watched Spock, sitting on the couch while he was on the floor, he felt like there was still some kind of distance between them. He had kept this to himself for long enough. He needed to voice his thoughts. His heart beat increased. He felt his palms growing wet.
Spock immediately noticed the change, turning to look at Jim. "Are you feeling all right, Jim? Your cardiac frequency is elevated."
"Spock. Do you ever want to be with me?" Jim blurted out. There he had asked. "I mean. I understand that you needed time and all that but... it's been six months and... We know each other now. I mean, we can literally finish each other's sentences. I mean... it feels like it's time to take a step forward but you don't seem to want that."
"You are concerned that our relationship is not moving along because I do not wish for it to move forward?" Spock asked.
"Well. Yeah. If you say it like that. Do you want to be with me? In a romantic way?" Jim asked, moving to once more sit next to the Vulcan.
"Of course I do, T'hy'la. You must never doubt this." Spock slowly laid aside the papers he had been holding. "Jim, do not think I do not wish to be with you in every way possible. But once I take this step with you, Jim, there is no going back."
"Wait. So we go on one date, and then that's just it?" Jim asked.
"No, Jim. We can date, we can even kiss. But if we get too close... a bond will form. A Bond that cannot be destroyed. It is not possible. We will be bonded for the rest of our lives. That is final, Jim. And that is the reason why I have tried to avoid your romantic advances." Spock turned his gaze to the perfectly white wall. "I wanted us to spend as much time together so that... the chance of you feeling comfortable enough to take this step with me would be bigger."
"So you've been keeping your distance for my benefit?" Jim asked, tilting his head to the side. "Giving me more time to get to know you, to know what I'm getting into?"
"That is correct. I did not want you to rush into something with me, Jim. Simply because a bond cannot be undone." Spock wasn't looking at Jim.
"Look Spock... I made that decision long ago. When I saw you lying in the hospital. I felt feelings I had never known I could feel. I knew that my place would always be at your side. You're the only one, T'hy'la. And I am ready."
Spock sighed, rubbing his face in a very unvulcan way. "Then we must keep it a secret. If the board finds out, the consequences will be immediate and unpleasant."
"Yeah I know. But Spock. I was thinking about this anyway." Jim gently took Spock's hand into his. "If I really go along with the commanding track. I won't be here very much. I'll be out in space, and you'll be here waiting for me. And... I just don't like the idea of that. And I was considering switching to something else. I can still do it until the end of this year."
"Jim, you may not have had the dream of becoming a captain for very long. But it is still your dream. And I cannot ask you to let your chance at becoming just that passes by, just because I would be left behind on earth." And finally, after six months, Spock actually returned the soft grasp, pressing his fingertips against Jim's.
"And I can't ask you to stay here waiting for me while I go out exploring space." Jim sighed, looking down at their joined hands. "My father died in space. I never got to see him, Spock. I never saw my own father. And even though I hate my mother for leaving me behind, I understand her pain. If I were to die out there... we wouldn't even get to say goodbye. I wouldn't be able to see your face again. That's nothing I want to risk. I can always switch to engineering. I can design new space ships."
"But that is not what you want, T'hy'la. You have always wanted to be in space." Spock said quietly.
"Things change, Spock. My life changed. I have you in it, now. I can't just think of myself anymore. I don't want to leave you here for weeks, maybe even months. I will find something else that I enjoy doing." Jim smiled, pressing Spock's hands reassuringly.
"Jim, I cannot agree to this." Spock said firmly.
"Okay, here's my suggestion. We go on a few dates. We take it easy, so our minds don't bond. And then, if we decide that we do want to bond, and stay together for the rest of our lives, we can talk about this again."
"That seems satisfactory." Spock said slowly.
"Okay. Then I'll pick you up Friday night for our first date." Jim smirked, utterly satisfied with how this had gone, going back to his book.
Spock's gaze was fixed on the human for just a few seconds before he too went back to his work.
"Would ya stop fidgeting? You know I'd like to get into that bathroom sometime today, too." Bones called from their bedroom. Jim just rolled his eyes.
"Hey, I'm taking a Vulcan out to a date okay? I'm nervous." Jim huffed, trying for the 6th time, and failing, to tame his hair and make it look more like something a serious grown up would wear.
"God Jim. It's not gonna make a freaking difference to that cold blooded hobgoblin. He'll be wearing his normal stuff too." Bones said, finally getting up from his bed, leaning against the door frame to the bathroom.
"Yeah well, I'm human, and I want to look good for my first date with the man I might marry, thank you very much." Jim replied.
"You know. That was a thing I never thought I would hear out of your mouth." Bones said. "But if you don't get out of this bathroom right now, two things will happen. A) I will kick you out so I can finally take a piss. B) You'll be late."
"What?! What time is it?" Jim asked, finally giving up on his hair, and bolting out of the bathroom.
"Time for you to put on your shoes and coat, and head out. Oh and make sure the Vulcan wears something that's appropriate for this weather. Don't need him trying to rip his clothes off in my clinic again." Bone teased, closing the bathroom door.
"Yeah, you'd instantly fall in love with my beautiful alien." He teased back, pulling on his jacket and zipping it up. Snow had fallen during the day, but luckily it had stopped now. Jim made his way to Spock's apartment, trying to fight the urge to whistle.
When he knocked on Spock's door, the door opened slowly. Spock looked at the snow covering the outside. "I assume we will be going somewhere off campus."
"You assume correctly, Mr. Spock. So throw on a jacket." If Jim's grin could have produced electricity, it would have lit up the entire the entire building.
"Very well." Spock walked back into his rooms, coming out with a tick jacket, pulling it on, and closing the door. "You have chosen a place to go to, then?"
"Yeah. Come on Spock." Jim smiled, tucking his hands into his pockets to shield them from the cold. "It's not far."
They walked in silence. Jim was excited, nervous, and this was slightly awkward. Not that he hadn't dreamed of this, he had. Many times. But dreaming and actually doing it was a big difference.
"So, how was your day?" Jim asked into the silence.
"My day was satisfactory." Spock answered. Then they both fell back into silence. Jim took a few more steps before he stopped, turning to Spock.
"Okay. So this isn't even close to what I wanted." Jim said, sighing quietly. "I mean... we're both so tense."
"I have to admit that I feel a certain tension as well. However I cannot find a logical reason for that. We have gone out to dinner many times before." Spock admitted, dark eyes staring into Jim's.
"Well, this is a date, Spock. It's not the same but... I don't want us to feel all awkward. So... let's drop the dinner idea." Slowly, he reached out to Spock, offering him his hand. "Come on."
Spock hesitated, searching the area for other individuals before slowly accepting the hand he was offered, their Fingers intertwining. Jim smiled, pulling Spock with him as they walked through the quiet streets, once again silent.
"You know. The first time I saw you. I knew you were something special." Jim said quietly, as they made their way through alleys, just walking, with no goal, no actual place to arrive. "I felt it. I looked at you, and somehow I knew you'd change my life. I just didn't think you would change so many things."
"I can relate to that, Jim. When we were children. You made me see things I never had before. I didn't know the meaning of friendship. You taught me many things. And I am still grateful for that." Spock answered quietly.
"And you... you thought me to be strong. And to never give up. I'm the guy I am today because of you." Jim stopped, standing in the darkness that was only light up by few, and far apart, streetlamps. He looked into Spock's face, into those beautiful eyes. He smiled, slowly reaching up with his free hand, caressing Spock's cheek with his thumb. "I am happy that I met you, Spock. And if you allow me to, I will show you every day, just how much you mean to me."
Spock looked speechless. His mouth hung open ever so slightly, and Jim could almost see the thoughts rushing through Spock's brain. It made him smile. What happened next, however, he did not expect.
Spock slowly leaned forward, and Jim's eyes grew wide. And before he could actually grasp what was going on, he felt Spock's very hot lips on his own. His body reacted immediately. His heart beat was so hard he thought it might come out of his chest; he started shaking, and feeling faint. But when Spock wanted to pull back, a concerned look on his face, Jim wrapped an arm around his neck, pulling him back down, roughly pressing his lips against the Vulcan's, nipping at them, tasting them. He had waited much too long for this.
He almost expected Spock to pull back, even push him away. But the Vulcan started kissing back, clumsily, as if he didn't really know what he was doing. Tongues and teeth clashed together, and it was still the best kiss Jim had ever experienced. Never had he been so aroused by a simple kiss. He pushed his body against Spock's, moaning as his erection rubbed against the Vulcan's leg.
That was when Spock drew the line. Slowly, he pulled back, breaking the kiss, leaving Jim breathless, and flushed cheeks. "Not here, T'hy'la." He whispered. "Not now."
Jim nodded slowly, closing his eyes and taking a steadying breath. "Let's just keep walking." He finally said, still holding Spock's hand as they made their way through the night. Finally, the tension seemed to be gone. They talked. Talked about when they were children. How Jim had always gotten Spock in trouble. How Spock had always scolded Jim. How Jim had tried to show the Vulcan how to swim, just to pull him out of the water only minutes later, afraid that the older boy would drown. Happy memories.
Jim made sure they didn't stay outside for much longer, knowing that Spock would be getting cold. They found a small restaurant that served vegetarian meals as well. They sat and talked some more, and while they did not hold hands anymore, Jim could have sworn that Spock's hand was brushing against 'accidentally' two or three times. They enjoyed their meal until Jim noticed two of the waitresses whispering and giggling, shooting looks over at the two men.
Jim was a little put off by it, but it wasn't until one of them came to their table, her cheeks as red as they could be, quickly laying a piece of paper next to Spock, before dashing off into the kitchen almost at light speed. The second waitresses giggled almost manically before also disappearing behind the door that lead to the kitchen.
Spock quirked a brow, looking at Jim confused as he picked up the paper. "What's it say?" Jim asked, moving closer to see what she had written, though he was pretty sure he knew what would be scribbled onto it.
"A phone number." Spock finally said. "I do not understand. Why would she give me her phone number?"
Jim had felt jealous right up to this moment. The way Spock looked down at the piece of paper, confused, and utterly clueless just made him laugh. Laugh until he had tears in his eyes.
"I fail to see how this is humorous." Spock said, quiet obviously irritated by Jim's behavior.
"I'm sorry Spock." Jim was gasping for breath, finally calming down. "She wants you to call her."
"And why would I call her?" Spock asked.
"..Spock. She finds you attractive. Or esthetically pleasing as you call it. She wants you to call her so you can take her out on a date." Jim grinned.
"...Then I should inform her that I am not interested." Spock said, standing up and making his way to the waitresses that was eagerly awaiting.
Jim couldn't hear what Spock said, but he did see the result. The girl started crying, and then ran off into the kitchen. Spock pulled out his wallet, paying for their meals, motioning for Jim to get ready to leave.
"What did you say to her?" Jim asked as they were outside once more, grinning. "Man, that looked brutal."
"I simply told her that I am not interested in her for I do not find her personality appealing, and she was not esthetically pleasing to me. Also, I informed her that I was already taken, and that it is not proper to try to find a mate in the way that she just did." Spock's voice was even as he spoke.
"...So you basically told her you find her annoying, ugly, skanky, and that you already had someone. Gosh, Spock. You could have let her down easy." Jim said, still grinning. "Poor girl will never try to hit on a guy ever again."
"Vulcan's cannot lie, Jim. I simply informed her that 'picking up', as you call it, a strange man in a restaurant and handing over such personal information so thoughtlessly is not a smart choice."
"Oh Spock." Jim grinned, hiding his hands in his pocket. They were heading back to campus, and they couldn't hold hands. Even if it was late, there was a chance that someone would see. But Spock did not object to Jim bringing him back to his room.
When they finally reached Spock's rooms, Jim didn't want to go. He just didn't want this to end like this. Not today. "Can I come in? Just for a little?" he asked. Spock looked at him for a moment, his eyes impervious, until he gave a short nod, opening his door and letting him in.
They stood there in silence, the tension building, and when Jim thought he was going to completely lose it, he felt the Vulcan's arms wrap around him, hot lips pressed to his once more. Jim felt his knee's give in, but Spock was holding him so tightly there was no way to fall. The Vulcan kept attacking his lips, over and over, and Jim could do nothing but yield to those demanding lips.
Spock pulled back, his breathing slightly labored as he looked at Jim. "T'hy'la." he whispered quietly.
"Spock... please... mind melt with me." Jim whispered breathlessly.
"T'hy'la... we cannot. If I get pulled in too deeply, the bond will be formed and we cannot go back."
"I don't care. You won't get pulled in too deep. Please T'hy'la. I need to feel you. I need to connect with you. Please, Spock, T'hy'la. Please." Jim pleaded.
Spock couldn't resist. He pulled Jim to sit on the sofa once more, and Jim dully noticed that he had never been in Spock's bedroom again, since he had slept off his drunkenness, but that wasn't important now.
The only important thing was that he was here with Spock, and that he would once more get to feel that wonderful thing that Spock called mind melt.
The Vulcan didn't take long before pressing his fingertips to the meld points on Jim's face. As always there was silence first. And then there it was. Spock's mind, brushing against his, wrapping him up in everything Spock was. Jim's eyes fluttered shut. This was better than anything. Better then sex even. To be so connected to someone, in such a deep way, was everything Jim never dared to dream of. But suddenly, the connection broke, and Spock pulled back.
Jim's eyes flew open, and he stared at Spock. "Why'd you... Why'd you stop?" He whispered. It could have only been seconds that they were connected. Why had he suddenly stopped?
"I am sorry T'hy'la. Our connection was too deep. I feared that the bond would establish if I had continued. I apologize. But that is a risk I could not take." Spock's eyes were cold once more, and Jim knew that was his cue to go.
"Okay. I understand. Will I see you tomorrow?" he asked. The Vulcan shook his head.
"I will need to meditate." Jim nodded, smiling at the Vulcan.
"I understand, T'hy'la. You can come to me whenever you want." He slowly stood, but Spock stopped him, brushing his lips against Jim's before letting him go once more.
"Good night, T'hy'la." Spock said.
"Good night, T'hy'la." Jim responded.
"How'd it go?" Bones asked as Jim came in, slipping out of his jacket, and taking off his shoes.
"Bones. I've done something that is better than sex. That's how it went." Jim smirked, letting himself fall onto his bed, staring up at the ceiling, grinning.
"Oh dear lord. You look like a fat cat that just gulped down 3 mice at once." Bones said, turning to his side to look at Jim. "What happened?"
"Well, we kissed. He shot down a girl in the most brutal way I have ever seen without even knowing. And then we mind melted. I'd say that's a pretty good date."
"Hold your horses. You mind melted?" Bones said, sitting up, staring down on Jim. "Like... really mind melted?"
"Yeah Bones. Really mind melted. And it was the most... beautiful thing ever. Honestly, you can't compare it to anything else." Jim said, his eyes shining. "I tell you bones. If I had to choose between sex and a mind melt with Spock. I'd take the mind melt every time."
"Hm. Are you sure that you're feeling this?" Bones asked.
"What do you mean?" Jim furrowed his brows.
"Well, a comment side affect of mind melts are that the emotions are transferred as well. I mean, are you sure these are your feelings, and not Spock's?"
Jim gaped at him. "So hold on. You're telling me that all these things I'm feeling, the whole T'hy'la business... could have been put into my brain by Spock?!"
"Well... if this was your first mind melt, then no I mean... Wait. Have you two mind melted before?" Jim swallowed. Hard.
"Y-Yeah... When he showed me what it means to be T'hy'la. I... He showed me his feelings, and the meaning of T'hy'la.. What I meant to him." Jim couldn't breathe. "And.. shortly after that I started feeling for him that way too..."
"Fuck Jim." Bones groaned. "Please, please tell me you didn't let that Vulcan put something into your brain that you didn't want."
"I... I don't know Bones. I never.. I didn't know. I didn't think that was possible!" Jim was panicking. What if all of this wasn't real? What if he was making a mistake? What if these were Spock's feelings, and not his? He stood, pacing the room, running fingers through his hair.
"Oh god. Bones. What if this... What if all of this that I'm feeling, what if it is all Spock? What if he just... put it into my brain?"
"Jim calm down, or you're gonna hurt yourself." Bones scolded, grabbing Jim by his arm, quickly pressing a hypo to his neck. "This will make you calm down. Come on, lay down." Bones helped him onto bed. "No sense in panicking. Close your eyes. Relax. We'll come up with something tomorrow."
But Jim was already fast asleep.
And once more, a chapter took me half the day. I hope you enjoyed this chapter.
Yours faithfully,
Akikofuma.