Disclaimer: Don't own Bones.

A/n: As always, thanks so much for all the comments and letter suggestions. They are so very awesome. Hope you enjoy this one!

Quagmire of Awkwardness

"… So as you can see, Booth worries needlessly."

"Oh, okay, Bones. Says the woman who doesn't know the meaning of the word caution."

"I resent that."

"Oh yeah, Bones, I'm sure you do. Sweets, don't you—Sweets … hey, Sweets!"

Booth snapped his fingers and Sweets' eyes snapped into focus. "I'm sorry, what?"

"What?" Booth's tone reeked of outrage. "Well hell, are we boring you?" he sniffed with a glare. "Because if we are, we'll be more than happy to take off. We've got better things to do with our Friday afternoon."

Booth was still bitter about the day of their rescheduled session. Not to mention the regular Saturday ones. The fact that Sweets and Brennan just didn't see how wrong it was to do this on a weekend continually made him want to tear out his hair. He'd been bitching and moaning about it for weeks, but since he was surrounded by workaholics, only one person had truly sympathized.

"I've spent years trying to explain to her that the point of the week is the weekend," Angela had commiserated. "I'm happy to pass the torch. Good luck with that."

"Dr. Sweets, is everything all right?"

"Y-yes!" It was said quickly and perhaps a little loudly. "Fine. Everything is perfectly fine. I'm sorry. My mind was—I apologize … please continue," he stammered.

Booth's eyes narrowed. "What's going on, Sweets?"

"Nothing," he practically squeaked.

"You have been strangely quiet today," Brennan noted with a penetrating gaze. "You usually regale us with your so called psychological insight, but today you appear … subdued."

"You know what, Bones, you're right." Booth studied him as well. "You're not your usual shrinky self. What gives?"

Sweets felt his face flush. Every time Booth called his partner by her nickname, he had an uncomfortable flashback. Bones. Oh yeah.

Brennan studied him with a penetrating stare. "Have you suffered some kind of trauma?"

"What?"

"Well, you're the one that says that when we don't act like ourselves, it's often as a result of emotional trauma," Brennan shrugged. "Does this have something to do with Ms. Wick?"

"What? No." Sweets felt like a trapped animal. "I mean, there's nothing going on. You know, I ask the questions here, you guys answer them."

"Ah, looks like you're on to something, Bones," Booth said smugly and Sweets felt his right eye twitch. "You've made him all defensive. Something's definitely going on."

Sweets jumped up from his chair. "You know, I think our time is up."

"No, there's still ten min—"

"Bones, let's go," Booth cut in quickly. "If the kid says our time is up then our time is up."

"Perhaps his watch is broken."

Sweets yanked on his tie. "I'll see you guys next week."

Brennan paused on her way to the door. "Next week? Not tomorrow?" Their current session was just a rescheduled one due to Sweets' flooded kitchen. The following day was supposed to be their regular time.

Booth gave Brennan a slight push in the direction of the door. "The man said next week, Bones. Let's not argue, okay."

Brennan gave him a suspicious look before letting Booth hustle her out of the office. With a sigh of relief, Sweets plopped back down in his chair.

Okay, he had a week to get his act together. But going by the fiasco that had been today's session, it was obvious he needed help. Reaching out, he grabbed his cell phone and dialed a number.

"Hey, are you busy today?" he asked the moment his call was answered. "Can we meet for lunch? I'll buy."

-x-

"I don't know how I feel about the fact that you thought I was the best person to help you with this."

"C'mon, Angela, who else could I turn to?" he beseeched.

"I still can't believe you heard them getting it on," she laughed out loud. In fact, she'd been pretty much laughing since Sweets had stuttered through the entire story. "I'll bet it was hot, right?"

"Angela! That's not the point. I need help!" he whined. "I can barely even look them in the eye. I'm their therapist, eye-contact is pretty damn important."

"So you overheard a few heavy pants," she shrugged. "It's not like you did it on purpose." She gave a rather dirty smile. "You didn't do it on purpose, did you?"

"Of course not!" He reeked of dignity. "I told you. Dr. Brennan didn't disconnect the call. She must have pressed the wrong button."

"Oh, I'm sure Booth thinks she pressed all the right buttons."

"You're not helping."

"You're right. I'm sorry." She schooled her features into an appropriate expression of sobriety. "Okay, just tell me that they have hot sex. Please, tell me."

Sweets slumped back in defeat. "You're not taking this at all seriously."

Angela laughed helplessly. "Because it's not that serious, Sweets."

"You know how private they are," he grumbled. "I feel very guilty that I violated that privacy and intruded on such an intimate moment, even if inadvertently."

"All right, I understand." Finally turning serious, she braced her elbows on the table. "But look, you said it yourself, it was barely a few seconds and as soon as you realized what was going on, you gave them their privacy. That's gotta count for something, right?"

"How do you think they will react if I tell them?"

"You really thinking of confessing, huh? Are you Catholic or something, Sweets? "

"No. I just—I don't know. Common sense tells me this is the kind of information you keep to yourself, but since I'm always encouraging them to be honest and open, it feels kinda hypocritical not to be honest myself."

"Well, I doubt Brennan will care. She'll probably say something like how she will be more careful in the future when disconnecting her calls and that'll be that."

Sweets nodded, in agreement with that assessment. "And Booth?"

"What do you think?"

"I think I'll be lucky if he doesn't shoot me."

Angela chuckled. "Nah, I don't think so. He's mellowed out a lot."

"Not where Dr. Brennan is concerned."

"Good point."

"I know the embarrassment will dissipate," Sweets mused. "At least, I hope it will. I really shouldn't say anything, right?"

"Sweets, think about it this way. If you overheard your parents having sex, would you tell them?"

Sweets made a face. "No way."

Angela picked up a fry and smiled. "Well, there's your answer."

-x-

Brennan threw back the covers and slid into bed. "There was something amiss with Sweets today, right?"

"He's embarrassed." Booth slid an arm around her waist and spooned around her. "Guess now we know he definitely heard something."

"You think so?"

"Kid has been avoiding me all week," Booth explained. "Plus, he couldn't look either one of us in the eye today."

She winced. "I can't believe I didn't end the call."

Booth kissed the back of her neck. "Well, you were pretty distracted at the time."

Brennan smirked. He sounded pretty blasé now, but at the time, when they'd realized she had hit one of the number keys instead of the end call button, he'd been horrified.

"Are you freaking kidding me?" he'd choked out in a strangled tone. "You mean … he … he … Bones, are you telling me, he heard us?"

"I can't be sure. But it's possible."

"Oh my god. Bones!"

"I suppose it must be very awkward for him."

"He's a big boy. I'm sure he can deal."

"It was my fault."

He kissed her shoulder reassuringly. "It was an accident."

"But—"

"Hey, forget about Sweets." His hand began to roam over her front in purposeful strokes. "I'd like your undivided attention now."

With a small smile, she turned in his arms and slid one thigh over his hip. "Sweets who?"

-x-

The plan was to finish this in time for the the premiere but I fell behind and it doesn't look like that will happen. Guess if I want to finish the alphabet, I'll just have to continue it even thought the show will be back on the air to entertain us. Next up is P, thoughts?