Hermione curled her fingers around the teacup as she lifted it to her lips, closing her eyes slightly, inhaling the soft aroma of the Earl Grey tea. Taking a sip, she stared out across the Loch, shivering slightly.
She felt Draco standing there before he placed his strong hands on her shoulders, a feeling of warmth causing her shivers to subside and her demeanour to relax. Closing her eyes, she felt him wrap the shawl he had brought out to the cottage verandah where she stood, more firmly around her shoulders.
"I know you prefer blankets to warming charms," he told her, his voice soft as he lifted the curls that the blanket trapped, his fingers grazing the nape of her neck, causing a completely different shiver to wash over her.
Somewhere in the depths of her mind she recalled the vague feeling: longing. She briefly wondered when she had last felt anything remotely akin to the feeling that hummed softly, frowning slightly before her curiosity waned.
"Thank you," she replied, a soft smile gracing her lips.
"I had a feeling you would enjoy the verandah," Draco smiled as he leaned against the balustrade.
"The view is beautiful from here," she conceded, glancing over his shoulder to watch a little boy run down the jetty on the opposite shore, his arm lifting suddenly to skim the stone he had been clutching tight in this hand, across the silent water.
After all this time it still made her breath hitch in her throat, adrenaline suddenly spiking as her chest tightened, when the smallest things triggered memories that had long since been buried deep in the recesses of her psyche.
Draco watched her quiver, her face paling slightly, his concern for her rising as he reached out a hand to steady her before taking the teacup from her vice-like grip. Silently he pulled her into his arms, knowing better than to question what had triggered her panic attack, stroking her hair softly as she steadied her breathing. He felt her wrap an arm around his waist, her free hand coming up to grip his jumper, seeking comfort from him and he gave it to her freely.
At times, despite her issues, Draco envied the way she was able to let her mask drop, raw emotion emanating from her. He would be lying if he said he didn't crave the same sort of release. Admittedly he had come a long way from the enforced stoicism of his childhood but he was a long way off the freedom of emotional expression Hermione, despite her broken and tortured state, experienced.
"I'm sorry," Hermione's voice broke Draco's train of thought, causing him to pull back, his confused eyes searching hers as her fingers brushed away the tears that settled like dew drops on her eyelashes. She chuckled nervously, as she looked away, taking in the silence around them. "I don't know why I am laughing," she told him, shrugging slightly.
"Why are you sorry?" Draco asked, taking her hands in his.
"I am broken, Draco. I know you don't understand me, but it's okay because I don't understand me," Hermione told him, her voice quiet as a whisper, her eyes refusing to meet his.
"I think I understand you a little better than you give me credit for," Draco replied, giving her hands a slight squeeze as he caught and held her gaze.
Hermione felt herself hum, a vague sense of desire building once more as something else she couldn't quite put her finger on wrapped itself around her heart. She had been numb for so long that she almost didn't recognise the feeling of wanting someone to kiss her. Closing her eyes, she breathed in deeply, inhaling the now familiar lemony bergamot scent that drifted into Jasmine; uplifting and slightly sweet with hints of woody vanilla and cinnamon. She knew his cologne by heart now, allowing the feeling to wash over her as she breathed it in. Memories of the two of them in close proximity flooded her senses and she allowed unbidden desire to build as she accepted what she already knew: she was sexually attracted to, and was aroused by, Draco Malfoy.
Her heart thumped in her chest as she felt herself drawn into him, edging ever slowly to what she now considered to be inevitable. Accepting fate, she wet her lip slightly, her mouth parting as Draco touched his forehead to hers. For a moment Hermione's mind went blank at the unexpected yet comforting gesture. Sighing deeply, she could not help the feeling of disappointment she felt wash over her.
Two days later, Hermione was curled up with a book, under the same blanket Draco had used as a shawl to wrap her in, sitting on the verandah when she heard the familiar whoosh of the floo. Suddenly, animated chatter filled the silent cottage as the teenage boys and Harry made their way through the cottage looking for the pair. Hermione heard the creaking of floorboards followed by the sound of Draco rushing down the stairs to greet his son.
"I thought I might find you out here," a familiar voice dragged Hermione from her reverie. Looking up she saw Harry leaning against the doorframe, hands in his pockets, smiling at her. "How are you?"
Hermione smiled. "I am well, thank you."
Harry pushed away from the doorframe coming to sit on the chair beside hers. Pushing his glasses up, he lifted the book from her hands and turned it over to peruse the title. He frowned as he read aloud: "'The Elements of Potion Making.' Would it kill you to read a novel every now and then?" he asked, raising one eyebrow.
"You've spent too much time with Draco," Hermione commented, attempting to take the book from him, avoiding answering his question.
"I am not the one living with him," Harry stated giving her a pointed look as he held the book away from her.
Hermione reached up and snatched the book from him, colouring slightly. "I am not living with Draco Malfoy," she snapped, a little shocked by the defensiveness in her voice, fixing her gaze on Harry defiantly. For a moment neither said a word as they shared a look that was only broken by Draco coughing as he stepped out onto the verandah, unsure what, if anything, he had interrupted. He wasn't used to feeling uncomfortable in his own home and the slight pang of jealousy hit him unexpectedly.
"The boys want a hot chocolate, would you like one, Hermione?" Draco asked, watching as something passed between the pair in front of him.
"Yes please, that would be lovely," Hermione answered, smiling reassuringly at Draco who nodded before ducking back inside.
"You didn't answer my question," Harry reminded her as she wrapped the blanket more securely around herself.
"I presumed it was rhetorical," Hermione answered, settling back down and focusing her attention. Harry said nothing, waiting while Hermione dragged her teeth across her bottom lip. Finally she spoke. "It's research."
"Isn't it always?" Harry chuckled, leaning forwards slightly, resting his elbows on his knees as he laced his hands together.
Hermione smiled, nostalgia washing over her as she recalled countless hours in the Hogwarts library, pouring over books of one subject or another in their efforts to vanquish the Dark Lord. "We are a product of our past experiences," she shrugged.
"You more than anyone," Harry commented, holding her gaze.
Hermione shook her head. "This isn't for me."
Harry frowned, pushing his glasses up his nose.
"This is for Draco," she continued before rushing out an explanation of their combined efforts to help those who were still struggling with the effects of the war.
"So it could be used to help you," Harry said once she paused to take a breath.
"I'm more concerned about Pansy," Hermione informed him. Harry looked at her, confused. "But from your letters it seems as though Pansy is getting better." Harry paused before continuing. "When are you going to stop putting everyone else first and start healing yourself?"
Hermione said nothing, shaking her head, willing the tears that threatened not to spill forth.
"I'm not having this conversation, Harry," Hermione muttered, quickly rubbing her eyes dry as Draco called out that the drinks were ready. Standing, she gathered up her blanket, feeling Harry reach out to grab her hand. "Hermione," he began, pausing as she stared back at him. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset you. It's just I have watched you do this ever since we were eleven years old. All I want is for you to be happy."
"I want that too, Harry," Hermione whispered. "I just don't think this is the answer for me," she gestured with the book. "Just let me find my own way," she told him, squeezing his hand.
Hermione opened her eyes and for a moment felt confused as to her surroundings. Sitting up, she rubbed her eyes and realised she must have fallen asleep on the couch. Harry was gone, and Draco had cleared away the mugs of hot chocolate, covering her with a blanket as she slept. Glancing around the lounge, she wondered what the time was as it had grown dark outside. Rising from the couch she yawned and stretched, her muscles aching slightly from where she had been curled up, and wondered where Draco and the boys were. Wandering through the cottage, orange light caught her eye as she glanced out the bay windows and she realised the three had lit a campfire outside and were huddled around it toasting marshmallows.
Draco smiled as she made her way down the steps towards the shore of the Loch where the three were sat. He patted the ground beside himself and nudged her playfully as she wrapped the blankets around herself. "I saved you some marshmallows," he told her, handing her the bag and a toasting fork.
"Look at those two," he whispered, as Scorpius and Albus shared a private joke, laughing together. "I've not seen him this happy or relaxed in a long time," Draco commented, nodding to Scorpius.
Hermione smiled as she toasted her marshmallow, her gaze drifting over the pair and then sideways at Draco who reached out to brush a loose curl away from her face.
"You seem more relaxed this evening, too," he commented. Hermione leaned into Draco's hand, closing her eyes.
Suddenly a cry went out, causing Hermione's eyes to snap open, as Albus jabbed Scorpius who held his side laughing. Scorpius took his revenge, pressing a sticky marshmallow into Albus' cheek. Albus roared as he wiped the sticky mess from his face, mashing it against Scorpius' lips. Scorpius responded by taking Albus' hand and pulling him in for a soft kiss. Hermione and Draco sat dumbfounded by the ease at which Albus reacted.
Feeling a little uncomfortable, Hermione blushed and glanced at Draco who clearly didn't know how to react to his son kissing his boyfriend so openly. Hermione stood, reaching down to take Draco by the hand. "Come on," she whispered, tugging him up and nodding towards the shore. "Let's go for a walk."
"It's not like I didn't know," Draco began after several minutes of silent walking. "And I have no issue with it. I just…" his voice trailed off.
"Wasn't expecting him to kiss Albus so openly like that?" Hermione suggested by way of finishing his sentence.
"Well, no."
Hermione chuckled. "It's completely normal to react like that to your own child kissing another," she reassured him, squeezing his hand as they picked their way along the stony shore of the Loch.
Hermione continued to chuckle.
"I'm glad you find this amusing," Draco commented, scowling as they came to a standstill facing each other.
"Oh relax," Hermione replied, stepping up on tiptoes to press a kiss to his cheek. Draco responded with a turn of his head, capturing her lips with his own as his fingers found their way into her chocolate curls, Hermione relaxing into his touch.
When they parted a few moments later Draco chuckled, suddenly nervous. "You have no idea how much I have wanted to do that," he breathed.
"Probably as much as I wanted you to," she replied, smiling, before kissing him soundly once more.