I know this update was quick, but I've learned that when Garcia speaks, it's just better to go along and write it down. Also, I'm starting another shift at work so my postings may be sporadic. So, I'm hoping this tides you over until I can get back on line.

Innocence Lost

Typing furiously, Ashley was completely engrossed in the report she was finishing when a pair of legs approached her desk.

"Agent Seaver?" the man asked.

Startled, Ashley spun around in her chair. "I'm sorry," she gasped, her hand covering her heart. "You startled me! I wasn't expecting any one."

The handsome agent grinned sheepishly. "I'm sorry." He flashed his credentials. "I'm Agent Sheen. I was sent by the higher ups to escort you home."

Ashley stood up and shook his hand. "I'm so glad to meet you. Agent Hotchner said that you would be arriving. I wasn't expecting you for a couple of more hours."

"There was a break in the storm and headquarters thought it might be best if we got on the road before the next blizzard hit."

"I understand that," Ashley empathized. "I still can't get used to how quickly they spring up here. Someone said it has to do with the altitude and desert."

"Well, I'm from Chicago and I'm used to storms. Director Harrington said that you were going to need around the clock security?" Agent Sheen asked.

"Yes." She took her seat and hit control space to darken her screen.

"May I ask why?"

"They didn't tell you?" Ashley tried to size him up.

Agent Sheen shrugged. "I'm still a probie and they don't really tell me anything but where to go and what to do when I get there."

Ashley chuckled. "I know exactly how you feel."

"So, are you ready? To leave?" he amended quickly.

"I just have to finish up this report and submit it to the chief; then we can go."

"I'll go get a cup of coffee."

"Okay. Do you know where the kitchen is?" she asked brightly.

He flashed her a dazzling smile. "I'll find it. Want some?"

"Not right now. Maybe later."

"See you in a few." Turning on his heel, Agent Sheen made his way across the office. Ashley hit the control key and pulled up her report. She was almost finished and when she submitted it, it was going to be the most perfect report. She'd bet her life on it.
*****

"What are you saying?" Penelope Garcia whispered. The air had suddenly been sucked out of the room upon Hotch's declaration that her sister was not dead.

"Emily is alive."

"You mean alive like…breathing, smiling, full cardio rhythm…?" Her eyes welled up with tears as her heart began to beat so fast she thought it was going to jump out of her chest.

Hotch nodded. "Yes."

"My darling precious sister has been alive this whole time and you were lying to us?" The realization was dawning on her and it was suddenly too much to take in.

"Garcia…"

"No!" She held up a neon painted finger tipped hand. "You lied to me?"

"We had to."

"I'm not asking a 'we' question; I'm asking a 'you' question. You demand the truth and honesty from every single member of this team. Your code is that we tell the truth so there is no doubt about the person having your back. And you of all people lied to us?"

Hotch nodded. "Yes." He paused. "For what it's worth, I'm sorry."

Garcia's eyes blazed hot. "For what it's worth, Hotch…and pardon my French here, but bite my hard drive! Do you know how many nights I cried myself to sleep wondering what I could have done differently? Do you know how many times I retraced all of my activities that day hoping that there wasn't something that I missed that would have helped us locate Emily faster? No! You don't!"

"Garcia…"

"I'm not finished with you yet, buster!" Garcia pushed herself to her feet and paced the room. She tried not to focus on grabbing the hard drive and beating her boss to death.

Sensing the underlying threat, Hotch maintained his silence. What she was saying bordered on insubordination, but if she got it off her chest and returned to her job to help capture Doyle, then he could handle what she had to say. Though, logically, he knew that he deserved everything coming his way. And more.

"I'm happy that Emily is alive. I would break out in a dance, but I'm not that excited by your news. I cried buckets of tears. I wept at her funeral. I prayed to a god I swore didn't exist hoping that he did so that I could be granted one more chance to see my angel face." Tears rolled down Garcia's cheeks fast and hot. "I hate you."

"I understand."

"No, I don't think you do. I really hate you. You lied to me. I'm the person who stood behind you and kept Strauss off your back…and you deceived me worse than Kevin did. You deceived me worse than Elle did. I hate Emily too, but you and JJ were in cahoots on this one."

"Are you done?"

"Almost. Were you ever going to tell us?" Garcia asked, her eyes searched his.

"Maybe. Someday. When Doyle had been caught, we were going to try and bring Emily back to the BAU."

"But what if Doyle had gotten hold of Emily and killed her over in Europe? How would you have brought her back? What would you have told us?" she asked. His silence spoke volumes. "You wouldn't have."

Hotch tried to find a response, but came up empty.

"We are supposed to be a family," she continued in a rushed stream of words. "We are supposed to be there for one another through all the good and bad…and guys like Ian Doyle. It doesn't matter if the ends justify the means because I could wipe Ian Doyle off the face of the earth with one key stroke. On the other hand, I wish you had told me about your plan for Emily because I could have done the same but at least I could have slept easier at night. But she would still be alive and I would know it."

"Doyle would have killed all of us without blinking if he had even hinted that Emily was alive. He had look outs monitoring us for weeks afterward waiting to see if we slipped up."

"All you had to do was say the word and I would have…"

Hotch placed a finger over her lips to shush her. "No you couldn't have; he knew everything about us, and he would have taken us out in one fell swoop that would have made the bombing in New York look like child's play."

"I…"

"He would have killed Jack and Henry, too. A son for a son.

Her eyes widened then her shoulders shook with sobs. Hotch held her tight in his arms.

"Garcia, are you alright?" he asked, concern was in his voice.

"No. Yes. My sister is alive. I'm going to be able to hold her again and put her back in my top eight," her voice trembled with emotion.

"Are you done now?" Hotch asked carefully.

"Yes."

"Good, because I am going to need you to do everything you can to make sure she and Rossi get back here alive and we catch Doyle."

"Okay, Boss. But there is still one more thing…"

"What?" Hotch prompted.

"I still hate you."

"I'm used to it," he replied and continued to hold her in his arms until her tears were gone.