"Good morning everyone no da," I yawned as I approached the Gryffindor table. I couldn't sleep last night. I had to figure out how to tell Celestial Princess what kept me up all night. I knew it would break her heart, but I had to tell her. I was feeling too guilty.
I sat down and quietly squirmed in my seat. I heard happy giggles from the seat on my left. Hermione was showing Miaka the bracelet Ron gave her a week and a half ago, on Valentine's Day.
"Hello, happy people!" Celestial Princess said, appearing out of nowhere. She was wearing her Chichiri shirt and a pair of off-white bellbottoms.
She sat down across from me and sang to herself as she poured a glass of orange juice.
"Kiss me like crazy
Kiss me as night fades into day
I always dreamed someone would kiss me just that way
Kiss me like crazy
I want your lips pressed close to mine
Don't ever stop
Your kiss intoxicates like wine"
To add to the moment, she took a dramatic sip of her orange juice.
"Celestial Princess no da?" She looked up at me, still drinking her orange juice. "Celestial Princess... I... I can't love you anymore no da."
She spit her orange juice back into the glass. "Please repeat that?"
"You heard what I said no da."
"And why can't you love me, may I ask?"
"Because I'm a monk no da. Monks shouldn't be in relationships."
"So why didn't you tell me that on the day you kissed me?" She was trying to fight back tears. I must admit, she had a point, though.
I tried to find something to say, but my mind drew a blank. My throat froze and my hands got all sweaty. My lungs suddenly seemed to shrink drastically. I tried to say something, but the only words I could force out of my frozen throat were "no da".
"Fine, then," she whispered, tears threatening to spill out of her eyes. "There are plenty more fish in the sea." She got up and started walking away, looking like she would break down and start crying at any second.
"Celestial Princess!" I called. "Wait no da!" She turned around and looked at me. Suddenly, my mouth didn't seem to work. I had no idea what to say. I just stood there, fully aware of everything. I suddenly realized how stupid I must look, wearing that stupid smiling mask after I just told Celestial Princess I dumped her.
She must think I'm mocking her no da, I thought. I took off the mask.
"Wait...." My voice trailed off. Still unsure of what to say, I started toying with my mask.
Celestial Princess looked at me for about a second, her tear-filled eyes boring into my soul. I've never seen her look so angry. It was actually kind of scary, to tell you the truth.
"Bastard," she spat in a voice so low I could barely hear her. She then stormed out of the Great Hall. That's when I noticed everyone's eyes on me.
"What no da?" I asked. "Why are you all looking at me?" I hoped that everyone would go back to their business and act like nothing had happened. Instead, they continued staring at me. Feeling vulnerable, I put my mask back on. Chiriko started banging his head against the table.
"Dear Suzaku," he cried. "You're so stupid, Chichiri!" This comment from the youngest seishi threw me off. "I don't believe you!" he continued. "You, Chichiri, the oldest of the seishi, the last person who we would all think would fall in love, fell in love again. Then, what do you do? You dump her."
"I agree," Harry piped up. "Look how lucky you are, Chichiri. Here's a hot chick drooling after you, ready to do anything for you. You have her eating out of the PALM OF YOUR HAND for Christ's sake! You kiss her, then you throw her out like yesterday's paper. You're such a player, Chichiri."
All this chastisement was starting to tick me off.
"I'm thinking the same thing," Hotohori said. "Chichiri, do you even know what it's like to have your heart broken?"
"YES!" I cried, chibifying in rage. "YES, YES, YES NO DA!!! I KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE TO HAVE MY HEART BROKEN. IF I DIDN'T, I WOULDN'T HAVE HAD THIS SCAR!" I pointed to the scar on my eye. "WHY ARE YOU ALL LECTURING ME NO DA?! IT'S TICKING ME OFF!! AND IF YOU MUST KNOW, I DUMPED CELESTIAL PRINCESS BECAUSE I'M A MONK AND REALIZED THAT MONKS SHOULDN'T BE DOING WHAT I'M DOING. It's all for the better no da," I concluded softly, un-chibifying. Ron smirked, Hotohori gave me a skeptical look, Chiriko started banging his head on the table again, muttering "stupid, stupid, stupid," and Tasuki coughed. A cough that sounded like "dumbass."
"FINE, YOU WANT ME TO TALK TO HER, I'LL TALK TO HER NO DA." I started walking out of the Great Hall. When I reached the doorway I called over my shoulder "HAPPY NOW NO DA?" Everyone made a motion that I should go further.
I found Celestial Princess crouched in a corner of the hallway, crying, not too far from the Great Hall. I approached her cautiously, knowing even the slightest thing can get you a scratch from her, and boy, her nails are sharp. Tamahome had still a scratch she gave him a few days ago from telling her something stupid. No one remembers what he said anymore, but he has the scratch to prove that you don't get on Celestial Princess' bad side.
"Celestial Princess no da?" I asked cautiously. She looked up.
"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HERE?" she asked, her tear-stained face suddenly becoming angry.
"No, you don't understand - "
"No, no, no, no, no, no, no!" she said, walking away from me. "First you dump me, now you want my sympathy?"
"I didn't dump you no da."
"Then what were you doing?" There was a pause where I was trying to think of what to say. "You know what? I don't need you. There are plenty of other hot guys here, and if I flirt enough, I'm sure I can get one of them."
She sure knows how to make a guy feel bad no da. I opened my mouth to try and reason with her.
"Don't say anything," she said. "Just get out of my life. I don't need you." She looked down and noticed that she was wearing her Chichiri shirt. "And I don't need this, either," she cried in fury, taking her shirt off and throwing it in my face.
I took the shirt off my face, the mask coming off with it. I gasped when I saw her. There was a wildness in her eyes, in her body, something that seemed to take over her soul. Something that was different now that she didn't have the shirt on. She seemed to have the attitude of a warrior princess. She looked like she would shoot a ki blast at me without warning.
I was actually almost right. She jumped at me, hands clawed, scratching the tender skin just below my good eye. I clutched my face, whimpering, as tears of pain welled up in my eyes.
"Dammit, I missed," she said quietly, running her fingers over the edges of her nails. I noticed that her nails were all triangular shaped, like little daggers.
"What, did you try to gouge out my eye no da?" I yelled at her.
"More or less, yeah," she replied nonchalantly, looking at her nails. I grabbed her hand and looked closely at her sharp nails.
"Your nails don't grow like this, do they no da?"
"I file them," she said matter-of-factly. "My nails are always sharp, but I do this so I can use them to the best of my abilities."
Crazy bitch, I thought. Maybe it wasn't such a bad idea to break up with you after all no da.
"You're crazy no da."
"Call me what you like," she said with a sick smile. "But how would you act if you were a boy-crazy teenage girl who always dreamed of having a boyfriend, then you get introduced to Fushigi Yugi by a friend, fall in love with Chichiri, then you become a fanfic author, actually get to meet the man you've been dreaming about all this time, then he kisses you and before you know it, you're putty in his hands, and one day, out of the blue, he says he can't love you anymore."
"That doesn't mean you have permission to almost gouge out my eye no da!"
"I was angry! Heck, I still am!" There was a pause. "Just... just... leave me alone." She crouched into a ball and began to cry again.
I went back to the Great Hall, leaving Celestial Princess to cry by herself. I suddenly felt really, really bad about myself.
"So," Nuriko asked me when I reached the table. "How'd it go?" Suddenly, eighteen pairs of eyes were upon me. I felt I would cry if I tried to say anything, so I just put Celestial Princess' shirt down on the table. Everyone stared at me, eyes wide, mouths hanging open.
Over the next few days, my life became a mess. Nothing seemed to matter anymore. I couldn't sleep, I was having trouble eating, and I wasn't thinking straight. But as bad as it was for me, Celestial Princess had it worse. She didn't return to her world. Rather, she stayed at Hogwarts crying in the arms of whoever offered them to her. Her only advantage was that everyone blamed me for her misery, so at least she had people to turn to.
On Saturday I got a letter at breakfast. I thanked Celestial Princess silently for having me be able to read English in this story, otherwise I never would have been able to get around.
As soon as I opened the letter, I wished that I couldn't read English so well.
Chichiri, the letter said.
I will make your life a living hell for the entire week next week starting tomorrow.
Sincerely,
You Know Who
"OH MY GOD!" cried Ron, who was reading the note over my shoulder. "YOU KNOW WHO'S CONTACTING YOU TO GET TO HARRY! WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE! DON'T SEND A RESPONSE, CHICHIRI! HARRY'S LIFE DEPENDS ON IT!"
Ron huddled under the table and wouldn't come out until he was totally convinced by Hermione that it wasn't Voldemort who was trying to contact me. Then she had to explain to the FY gang (as celestial Princess called us), who Voldemort was. After that, she had to read my note out loud to see what made Ron so nervous. Then everyone started plotting what Celestial Princess would do to make my life a living hell and how to stop her.
We were a lot less productive than we sounded.
A/N: O.K., this took a long time to come out. I hope it was worth the wait. My little brother was pretty sick lately and I was getting a lot of schoolwork, so I didn't have much time on the computer. Sorry if this chapter sucked, but I was also experiencing writer's block, and I'm trying to work on about four or five stories at once, and it's hard to begin new stories.
P.S. Check out Replacement, everybody! I started it pretty recently and I want reviews!