The Rom-com of Haruhi Suzumiya
Chapter 10: Back... to the future!
I was sleeping, but on the verge of waking up. For some reason, a massive draft had entered it's way into my room. Also I could hear faint, repetitive noises, something like breathing.
So when I opened my eyes, turned my head over and saw Haruhi lying on the floor, it's pretty understandable that I screamed. She was sound asleep... what the hell was she doing there?
My little sister must've heard the scream, and burst into my room asking "What's wrong, Kyon?" and then screamed herself at the sight. She noted how Haruhi was in a dressing gown, and her clothes were all over the floor, so I can see how she assumed the worst.
"Kyon! You dirty man! Why'd you have to do that! While I was sleeping in the house? Why?"
Haruhi woke up to the sounds of my sister telling me off and my fervent attempts to explain the situation. She then spoke up, and said, "It's okay, Little Sister... I snuck in here at night through the window."
For once I was relieved that Haruhi had spoken. With that, my sister simply left my room, confused.
"Kyon, do you know why I'm here?"
"I'd love to know why you're here." I replied.
"It's because I heard you whisper 'I love you' into my ear, I felt you kiss my cheek, and I read your little note..."
So, you're just going to ignore the various laws stopping you from breaking into people's houses, are you?
"Well... I felt like I should return the favour, so I snuck in here, whispered 'I love you' into your ear, and kissed you on the cheek. I then got tired and fell asleep."
So, that explains all the clothes, the draft, and the dressing gown...
"Right... so... uh... are we... uh... dating now?"
"Yeah! Absolutely!"
I then heard a polyphonic 'I know a song that'll get on your nerves'... Koizumi.
"Hello?" I asked while picking up my mobile.
The voice of Koizumi replied, "Where's Miss Suzumiya?"
"Right here."
"Oh, okay... now, I'll try and say this as quietly as possible, but... did you tell Miss Suzumiya anything last night?"
"Just a bit of harmless banter. Why?"
"Well, last night I realized that I can use my esper powers outside of closed space..."
"And that's bad why?"
"Because if I can, then other espers can too, and not all espers are as good-willed as yours truly... some wish to harm humanity with their powers. Now they can... easily."
"Calm down Koizumi... actually, she's only convinced you are head esper, not anyone else. I think that only you have these powers... not anyone else."
Haruhi was looking at me as if she knew all along I was affiliated with supernatural beings.
"Um, Miss Suzumiya is right next to the phone, isn't she?" Esper boy replied nervously.
"Yes, yes she is. She's heard everything... good luck solving this closed space!" I said, and hung up.
Haruhi was ecstatic. "You... you knew Itsuki was an esper the whole time! You weren't lying to me that one time! He's an esper! A real life esper!"
"Yep, that's right. Life truly is interesting, Haruhi."
"What else do you know, Kyon? Is Mikuru a..."
But a polyphonic 'Doctor who' tune interrupted Haruhi. Miss Asahina's phone.
"Hi, Kyon." Kunikida's voice greeted. "Can you put Miss Suzumiya on?"
How did he know Haruhi's with me?
"Sure." I handed Haruhi the phone.
Haruhi said, "Hello? Oh, Kunikida. What? You? Mikuru? Together? Thanks to me? Oh, it was nothing! You look good together anyway! Good luck! I hope you stay together for a while!" and then she hung up.
"Kyon! Love is thoroughly in the air! Our efforts aren't futile! Kyon! I'm so happy I could..." Haruhi then proceeded to hug me s hard that I felt like the victim of a Boa Constrictor. Then a polyphonic 'Gourmet race' saved my lungs. I was released, and Haruhi answered.
"It's for you." she said, and handed me my phone, "It's Taniguchi."
"What's up?"
"Hey Kyon." Taniguchi's voice replied, "I had an awesome time with Koizumi and the others last night... we did some dance called Hare Hare Yukai and then had a pillow fight! It was so awesome! We had a sleepover and everything! It was so cool! And it's all thanks to the SOS Brigade. You and Suzumiya deserve a medal for making this weird club. What? You wanna speak, too? Oh, okay. Yuki wants to speak to you."
I then heard Nagato say, "I also enjoyed myself." The phone then hung up again... how much more of these phone calls was I gonna receive? Oh well, I'm glad even Nagato had fun last night...
This morning had been simply wonderful so far, but it got better... my sister had made me and Haruhi a romantic breakfast for two.
"Enjoy, guys!" she said.
We spent most of breakfast gazing into each others' eyes... now, I still aren't that keen on a serious relationship with Haruhi, but I wish this moment between us would never end... Haruhi wasn't insulting me, or hassling me, or doing anything remotely evil or inconsiderate... perhaps this is all she needed... for the weird world we live in to reveal itself to her.
"Look, Haruhi, I'm sorry for all the times I've been sarcastic... or... tried to keep you in the dark. Koizumi told me not to tell you he's an esper, but I've always wanted to..."
"It's okay, Kyon. I'm sorry if I've acted bitchy or nasty to you... I just wanted some attention, that's all."
"It's okay. I know that now..."
My little sister came to 'check up' on us. She then whispered, "When you're done with that mouthful, kiss her!"
My sister's whispers were loud enough for Haruhi to hear, and Haruhi visibly blushed.
"What do you say Haruhi?"
"I say finish your mouthful..." she replied back in a somewhat seductive way.
Then we kissed... on the lips, for what seemed like ages. It's the point where in a romance story music would play, and the camera would circle around us while we kiss... I hate to say it, but I enjoyed it... a lot.
The day got better from there... we stayed in, doing homework, playing video games, and generally just having a good time. I then decided it'd be good to go on a date... a real date, with Haruhi.
Upon exiting the house, I was surprised to hear crackling, and see a massive flash, and a Delorean appeared where the flash was... Kunikida's prototype TPDD. And yes, Kunikida was in it, wearing a ridiculous grey wig, and a slightly older-looking Miss Asahina was in the passenger seat.
"What the hell is this?" I asked instinctively.
Then, doing his best 'Doc Brown' impression, he said, "Enough about that... something happens in the future!"
He then started raiding my trash and put it in a 'Mr Fusion' reactor on the top of his time machine.
"So, what happens to us?" I asked.
"It's not you, you turn out fine! It's your kids, Kyon! Something's gotta be done about your kids!"
So I entered his time machine, as did Haruhi, who was clearly loving the fact that Kunikida and Miss Asahina were both time travellers.
"Wait a second, Kunikida... if I know this correctly, your time machine needs to get to 88 miles an hour to travel through time, right? The road isn't big enough here..."
"Ha, you didn't watch the end of Back to the Future, did you? Alright, I'll say the line..." Kunikida then cleared his throat, "Roads? Where we're going, we don't need roads..." and then he put on some funky-looking 'flight glasses'. I then felt the car float upwards, and quickly accelerate up to 88 miles an hour, sparks coming off... and then...
FLASH!
Now, to finish with a song:
Nazonazo, mitai ni
Chikyuugo wo tokiakashitara
Minna de dokemade mo ikerune.
Jikan no hate made BOOOOON!
WARP de LOOP no kono omoi wa
Nanimo kamo wo makikonda souzou de...
A-so-bo-u!
Aru, Hareta, hi no koto
Mahou ijou no yukai ga
Kagariniku, furisosogu
Fukanou ja naiwa.
Ashita, mata, au toki
Warainagara HUMMING-u
Ureshisa wo atsumeyou
Kantan nandayo konnano.
Oikakatene.
Tsukamaete mite.
Ookina yume, yume
Suki desho?
(Musical ending, epic win)
Author's note: It's finished! I bet that ending was unexpected! Haruhi's more aware than ever, and there's a freaking time machine... made from a Delorean?
If you're disappointed with this ending, feel free to vocalize... I might make an alternate ending.