Chapter 10

August 13, 1999

She knocked urgently on his door for the third time. She had already tried the standard unlocking charms, but to no avail. She was starting to consider just exploding the door when if flew open and she was faced with a livid Snape.

"What, Granger?!" he roared.

"Let's not do this in the hallway," she said firmly and pushed past him into the room. With their tempers, she knew it was a distinct possibility that it would come to a screaming match and she would really prefer for the entire house not to overhear information in quite that manner.

He shut the door, casting locking and silencing charms on it, and turned to glare at her. "What do you want?" he demanded again.

Hermione sighed. "I was hoping to apologize, actually."

"Apology not accepted," he snarled.

"Really, Severus! I swear I didn't mean to hit you there," she said, already starting to grow impatient.

"You don't know what it's like," he said in a low voice, "to always be judged because of something you did in the past."

Hermione scowled. "I wasn't judging you, Severus! It was an accident! And do not even presume to know what I know! You think I don't know what it feels like to be judged at a glance? I've been one of the most widely recognized faces in the wizarding world since I was twelve!"

"Oh yes," he sneered, "how difficult it must be for you to be known for you amazing heroic exploits with Potter. I wonder that you haven't yet died of shame."

"I never wanted any of it! I never wanted to become famous! I never wanted people fawning over me! People don't want to know me, they want to know the amazing girl who saved the world! At least people leave you alone!"

"And why is that, Granger?" he asked dangerously.

She glared at him. "Because you scare people! You do exactly what you're doing right now! I came up here to apologize, damn it!" She stomped her foot at him. "And I didn't even do it on purpose!"

She could see him shaking with rage. He turned his back on her. "Get out," he hissed.

Hermione crossed her arms over her chest. "No."

He whipped back around to face her. "What did you say to me, girl?" he demanded, voice dangerously low.

She cocked an eyebrow at him. "I'm not a little girl anymore, and you can't intimidate me like you did then."

Severus lunged toward her and grabbed her shoulders, shaking her roughly with each word. "Maybe you should be intimidated." She stared at him with wide eyes and he let go of her with a heavy sigh. He turned away and ran a hand through his hair. "I'm not a nice man, Hermione. I've done things you can't even imagine."

"Is that what this is about?" she demanded gently. "Severus, you changed sides. Everything you did was for the-"

"Don't," he hissed, "say it was for the greater good. Dumbledore is dead, Hermione, and we all know who killed him. Do not quote him to me."

She made an impatient noise. "It was all for the greater good. And look how everything turned out. Voldemort is gone." He hissed at her use of the name. "Yes, Dumbledore is gone also, but you did what you had to do, Severus. He was already dying a slow and painful death. You did him a kindness by killing him. Severus, we all did things in that war that we're ashamed of. You are no different. Much as you love to pretend otherwise, you're only human like the rest of us."

He dropped into the desk chair and let his head fall into his hands. He didn't say anything more and Hermione crawled onto the bed to wait out his silence. As she waited, her mind wandered back over the past year.

After Voldemort had fallen, she and Madam Pomfrey had gone back to the Shrieking Shack with the expectation of bringing back a corpse. Instead they had found Snape clinging to life by his fingertips. They had set up a hospital area for him right there until he was stable enough to be moved into the hospital wing. His recovery was long and painful for all involved, as his near death experience proved to have changed him very little. When he recovered enough to return to teaching, he was just as bitter, just as sarcastic, and just as angry as he had been before.

For Harry, Ron, and Hermione, the year had proved uneventful, the most excitement all year being the rush to study for NEWTs. It was the first year that there had been no mystery to unravel, no threat from Voldemort to guard against at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Aside from the distinct lack of danger, though, nothing had changed. Snape was still horrible, Hermione still studied as though her life depended on it, Harry and Ron continued to procrastinate at their schoolwork, begging at the last minute for Hermione to help them, and Hermione continued to take pity on them and warn them that this was really the last time she would help them. Everything had changed, and yet nothing really had. The world had turned upside down for so many people who had lost loved ones, but life continued on as usual.

Somehow the year had seemed surreal. Strangely, Hermione's difficulties now felt more solid than her year of peace had. She supposed she had just grown so accustomed to hardship that her life seemed empty without it. She snorted. Her life was so screwed up.

She glanced toward the man across the room from her. Her gaze rested on his dark hair and black-robed figure, studying him. She noticed the way his back was hunched forward in defeat. His shoulders were pulled in on himself as though he were trying to block out the world. He was such a mystery to her. She could see no sign of anything warm or caring in him anywhere, and yet she knew it was there somewhere. It was buried deep under the rubble of his frozen heart, but she would find it. If it took her the rest of her life, she would revive his spirit, if only for the sake of their child. But that was reason enough for her.

She yawned, suddenly realizing how tired she was. The nightmares that had plagued her so mercilessly after the war had returned in full force in the last few weeks. It was probably the hormones upsetting her system. She sighed and laid down across the length of the bed, stretching out on her side with her eyes fixed on Severus.

oOo

The battlefield stretched endlessly on every side of her. Black-hooded Death Eaters surrounded her, intermixed with her friends and members of the Order. Curses flew around her and she whipped round and round, trying to take in the chaos surrounding her. She reached for her wand to blast a Death Eater who was creeping toward her, only to find that it was missing.

She swore and dove through the mass of fighters, dodging the curses. She was fairly sure that the castle was this way, but then, there was no way to be sure of that. Nothing was visible through the smoke rising steadily from the field. She paused in her flight. Smoke?

A sudden high pitched shriek echoed across the grass. She stared intently in the direction of the sound. A flickering red glow stared back. Through the flames she could make out demonic shapes laughing and dancing in sadistic merriment.

Icy terror clutched at her and threatened to overwhelm her. Fiendfyre! The roar of the magical flames could be heard over the shouts of battle, the demonic cackles sending chills down her spine as they consumed another victim.

She took a few stumbling steps backward from the advancing flames. Her back hit a solid body and she whipped around. A black-robed figure grabbed her arm and she gasped in shock.

Severus Snape sneered down at her. "Are you afraid of me now, little girl?"

She nodded, eyes wide.

He smiled nastily. "Good." Abruptly he pulled her against him. She had no time to react before his lips were crushed against hers. Her hesitation was brief before she allowed her instinct to take over. She wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled herself closer. The battle seemed to melt away from them as he ran his tongue across her bottom lip. She opened her mouth to let him in, but he pulled away with a smirk.

"Whore." He shoved her backwards into the waiting flames.

She fell into the fire and screamed as the satanic figures consumed her.

A/N: Yes, this chapter may sound very very familiar to those who read the older version first. It happens to have come straight from that version. Hope you enjoyed!

Personally, I really think I deserve lots and lots of long and happy reviews for giving you two updates in one day ;D