Chapter Ten- Crazy Eyes

They hustled to the car with the security guy chasing after Spinelli.

"Stay back!" Spinelli yelled at the overweight guard, who was dressed in cowboy boots and hat, blue jean pants and shirt plus a bolo tie . He wore a badge that proclaimed him Big Earl.

Spinelli stopped, spun around and threatened in his squeaky voice " I know karate!"

He did the classic stance from The Karate Kid. Then tumbled to the ground.

Big Earl shouted as he ran closer. "Abigail is a my girl, you Yankee!"

Spinelli jumped up, stumbled over his own feet and then ran till he could dive into the SUV.

"You could have helped me, Stone Cold." Spinelli whined

"Why? You know karate." Jason said from the driver's seat.

Big Earl yelled, "And don't bring your chicken Yankee butt back, you hear!"

They drove to a gas station where Carly bought Tylenol PM for Jason. She talked him into taking it and letting Milo drive.

Jason moved to the back seat.

Carly climbed in the front seat. Lulu sat between Jason and Spinelli.

The kids were under strict instructions to be quiet. Which meant to them, whispering their inane conversations.

"Oh Blond One, why don't you and me shake a tail feather together when we get back home?" Spinelli asked Lulu, moving his eyebrows up and down rapidly.

Milo gave him a hard glare into the rearview mirror, one that said Over my dead body will that ever happen!

Spinelli spotted it and whispered to Lulu, "Whoa, whoa, whoa, you got something going on with Crazy Eyes?"

Milo said harshly, "Don't call me Crazy Eyes."

"Don't give me crazy eyes, Crazy Eyes." Spinelli shot back.

"You are ridiculous." Milo said.

"I agree," chimed in Jason, who had his head leaned back and eyes closed.

They continued on in the same fashion with Spinelli bringing up bizarre topics like what would be the best cereal to eat if you could only eat cereal for the rest of your life and if they were all characters on Seinfeld which ones would they be . After much debate it was decided Carly would be Elaine, Spinelli would be Kramer and Jason would be Jerry. Lulu was stuck as George( perennially unlucky, which was how she thought of herself) and Milo was declared Newman-because Spinelli said he had a grouchy personality at times.

Those times all happened to be when The Jackal was hitting on Lulu.

Somehow Jason manage to fall asleep during all of this. The last thing he said before drifting off was, "Milo, do not crash this car. Do not stop this car. Do not let them talk you into anything. Just keep your foot on the gas until you see the gates of Greystone."

"Don't worry, Jase," Carly promised "there will be no problems."

HOURS LATER

Jason woke up to a problem. He was shivering. Not because he had a fever but because it was cold outside.

During the warmest winter on record in years, Milo has managed to drive them right into Antarctica. At least that is what it looked like to Jason when he stared out the window.

Since he was alone in the SUV, he decided the only option he had was to get out and see where the other four might have wondered off to.

As soon as he stepped into the breathtakingly cold snowstorm, hail started to pelt him, bouncing off his head, hands, and body. Jason looked up and saw a sign

I NO TELL MOTEL

Most of the letters in the neon flashing name were out. Originally it had read, Sid Northwell's Motel.

Jason dashed into the building, still tired and in a daze. Maybe this is a nightmare, he thought. Maybe I never met anyone named Spinelli.

Carly was walking through the small run down lobby and spotted him.

"I was just about to come back out and get you," she said "I got three rooms because that is all they had left. The kids are already upstairs."

Jason sighed.

He asked her, "Are we ever going home?"

Carly laughed. "The boys are there. So of course we are. Eventually."

"Just checking," Jason said as he followed her upstairs.

They walked into their room, which had an adjoining one next to it, and spotted Spinelli in the mini fridge.

"Not so fast, Baby Jack." Carly said, walking over.

"It's The Jackal." Spinelli corrected.

"Pass them over. Now. There is no way you are twenty-one years old yet."

Spinelli gave her ten little bottles of alcohol. Carly put them back.

Jason asked, "Where are the other two?"

"In there. Being all freaky deaky. Gag. It just ain't right, man."

Spinelli answered

Jason glanced at the slightly open door to the adjoining room.

"Lesley Lou Spencer!" he bellowed

"What?" she called back, annoyed.

"I want five feet between you two at all times!" Jason ordered.

Lulu and Milo were standing near the window of the other room, talking. She slid closer to him, put her hand on his and said, with a flirty tone to her voice, "I don't take orders from him."

Milo smiled at her. He leaned closer.

Jason appeared in the doorway. "FIVE FEET!"

Milo stumbled backwards, startled, until he ran into the wall.

Lulu glared at Jason, "Why do you care?"

Jason didn't answer, instead he stared at Milo.

Carly called from the other room, "Because you're family, Lulu."

Lulu stomped out of her room, pushed past Jason and confronted Carly. " I'm your family, not his. My own father doesn't care who I sleep with!"

"You're sleeping with Crazy Eyes!?!" Spinelli sputtered

Milo, who was now standing in the doorway near Jason, shook his head rapidly back and forth at Jason and threw up his hands to silently say no.

Jason gave him a ticked off look. Lulu and Milo could do whatever they wanted back in Port Charles but as long as Jason was in charge of her, there would have no funny business.

"My family is Jason's family, too." Carly said as she paged through the phone book.

Lulu groaned. "So what are you saying? I am stuck with Mr. Buzz Kill bossing me around for life now?"

Carly smiled at her. "He only wants you to be safe."

Lulu crossed her arms over her chest and stomped her foot in frustration.

Jason looked at Carly and pleaded, "Could you please feed them so they can go to bed?"

"Pizza is on the way," she said, picking up the phone.

AFTER DINNER, where Jason demanded to know why Milo and Carly were wearing different clothes and was none to happy to learn they had stopped at a mall before the hail stormCarly went to take a shower.

Jason told Milo, "You have Spinelli till morning. Take him to the room across the hall. Don't let him out of your sight. Got it?"

"I have to be roomies with Crazy Eyes?" Spinelli whined "Listen, Jase..."

"Never call me that."

"Okay, Stone Cold, " Spinelli said "Listen, I will not be able to sleep a wink with your associate in the same room."

Spinelli dropped his voice and whispered to Jason, though Lulu and Milo clearly heard him, "He's a Newman. Need I say more?"

Jason shook his head, not making any sense out of that, and ordered, "No. Say no more. Just go. Now."

Milo noted their was only one bed in each of the adjoining hotel rooms. He asked nervously, "What if there aren't two beds?"

Jason said, "Then handcuff the loud one to the toilet for the night. I don't care! Just stay out of my sight till the sun comes up. And then, even if it is hailing golf balls, we are getting back on the road. This trip is ending by tomorrow night. Understood?"

"Yes, sir." Milo said, unhappily.

Spinelli and him left, with Spinelli asking him as they stepped into the hall,

"He was joking about the handcuff thing, right? Right? RIGHT? Answer me, Crazy Eyes!"

Coming up in the next two chapters- It's a long, long night for the Road Trippers with some kisses, some singing and some screaming.