Shattered
""An author doesn't necessarily understand the meaning of his own story better than anyone else."
-Alice in Wonderland
When they'd taken her away, she hadn't made a word of protest. He thought that maybe she was too weak to try. Her eyes, however – her eyes followed him, eyes that were struggling into be panicked. Her eyes conveyed what her brick wall would not allow her to say. Pent up emotion escaped there. He'd always written that eyes were the windows to a soul, but he'd never seen it in life. Until today. Until her.
Her eyes were in his mind as he waited. Around him, the human invention known as time ceased to exist. There was no time. Life existed in the measure of breaths taken, of nurses passing, of heartbeats. How was it that time still existed for others? How was it that others went on, existed, when he was at such a standstill, a virtual impasse? He was reminded of the horse that reared because it could not go backwards or forwards, only upwards.
Not knowing was so much worse than knowing.
"Dad!"
The appearance of Alexis started time again.
She was holding several things – a grocery bag from CVS in one hand, a bag from 7-11 in the other. She placed them both down by the legs of her father's chair before wrapping her arms around his neck. In that one second, she was a young child again. Everything was alright with her arms wrapped around her Dad.
Alexis pretended not to notice that her hands were shaking, because if she pretended that things were alright then maybe they would be. It was hard, though, because she knew that things weren't alright. She was a smart girl, she couldn't pretend for too long without it pushing back in on her like a breaking ocean wave. But she had to hold it off for as long as she could, or else she'd drown.
"Hey, sweetheart." He tried not to sound tired. "What've you got there?"
She smiled, lighting up. She was good at this: taking care of things, making things right. "Everything." She answered promptly, digging her hand into the bag from 7-11. "I figured you hadn't eaten yet, so …" she pulled out a water bottle and handed it to him. "Oh, and I got you some Twinkies, too." She handed him those and reached back into the bag. "I know she won't be able to eat these yet but I noticed she liked them. I tried to get bear claws but these were the best I could do." She handed her father the Hostess Snowballs.
Castle grinned. "You're observant."
"I'm your daughter. I was brought up to be observant." Alexis teased before handing him the bag from CVS. "Pens and a notebook. You know, just in case."
"You're amazing."
"I know."
Castle finally noticed Esposito's presence, standing slightly behind Alexis.
"How is she?" The detective asked.
"No word yet." He answered. It felt like hours – no, days – since they'd taken her away, but in reality it had been only an hour and a half. "But she was conscious in the ambulance. Told me to shut up, actually."
Alexis grinned, but it was a faltering grin.
Esposito rubbed the back of his head. "Ryan will be awhile. He took Anderson into the precinct."
Nobody spoke for a moment. Alexis took the seat next to her father in silence, pulling a Jodi Picoult novel from the CVS back and curling her legs up to her chest. Esposito leaned back against the wall, his eyes wanting to close. It'd been the sort of day every cop dreaded having to face.
But they'd made it through. A bit damaged, in need of repair, but they were all breathing. They'd survived.
"Someone should call Lanie." Castle broke the silence by saying. "Let her know." His eyes went to Esposito.
"She's on vacation this week, visiting her sister in Seattle. Newborn niece. She'll be back in three days."
Castle sighed. "She'll kill us if we don't let her know."
"And Beckett will murder us if Lanie decides to cut her vacation short." Esposito said. "It's your call."
Alexis put down her novel. "I could call her." She'd met the medical examiner when she'd helped out at the precinct awhile back. "I can convince her not to come down." She held out her hand. "It can't hurt." Perhaps she would be better at it then a guy would.
Esposito's mouth twitched in a grin. "You know, you help out anymore and we're going to have to hire you."
"As long as it gets me out of school."
"By the way, school, you're going to that tomorrow." Castle reminded her. It was Sunday, and she had a history test the next day.
"Ugh." She muttered, stifling the argument begging to rise to the surface. "So … am I calling her?" She raised her brow, and Esposito handed her the phone. "Thank you." She disappeared into a more silent area – but one where her father could still keep an eye on her. After the day that he'd had today, she was sure that he'd appreciate it.
The phone rang twice before Lanie's voice came across the other end. "Hey. It's Lanie."
"Hi." She said, then added, "Don't freak out. It's Alexis Castle."
There was a pause on the other end of the line. "Freak out? Alexis, why would I freak out? Who's hurt?"
"Everyone's okay," She began by assuring her, "but you have to promise me that you won't race down here, because then Kate'll kill my Dad for letting me call you."
"What happened?" Lanie said, and Alexis could imagine the medical examiner raising her eyebrows. There was no promise in Lanie's sentence, but Alexis continued.
"She's okay. Dad says she's hurt but she was awake in the ambulance." As an afterthought, she added, "She told him to shut up. Apparently." She almost smiled. Almost.
"She was shot." Lanie inferred with an edge to her voice.
"No, no." She quickly countered. "She was, uh, taken. From her apartment. But she's alright, Lanie. We got the guy." Alexis could almost see the woman on the other end of the line beginning to panic.
"Why isn't Esposito calling?"
"I promised I'd convince you not to leave Seattle." Alexis said, biting a nail. "She's not going to want you to do that. You know that." She prodded, leaning against a wall. "We both know that. It's just three days and then you'll be back."
"Alexis-"
"It's your newborn niece." She countered. "We'll take care of Beckett. I promise."
Alexis could almost see the older woman ponder it. "Girl, you are just as stubborn as your father."
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Author's Note:
I'm not as sure about this chapter as I am the rest – but I hope that you enjoyed it anyway. Let me know what you thought about it, please. It'd mean a lot to me. I debated cutting it off where it was - obviously I ended up doing that - because I figured you'd llike quality instead of quantity. Anyway, please review!
Disclaimer:
Your author, SignedSealedWritten, is eighteen, and no way associated with the show. Just in case you were wondering.