10
"I'm gonna confess to her again."
"I-I see…"
"What are you going to do?" Honoka looked at the greyish haired girl seriously.
"I...I'm…."
Kotori took in a huge breath and said, "I'm going to tell her how I feel as well."
"Looks like you've finally made up your mind," Honoka smiled.
"Thanks to you, Honoka-chan," Kotori returned the smile, "If it weren't for you I'll still be tormented by my feelings for Umi-chan. You're the one who made me realise that there's nothing wrong with me liking someone and that one shouldn't think less of themselves."
"Hehe, now I'll have to work harder as well! I won't let my new rival beat me!" Honoka grinned impishly.
Kotori laughed just as Umi's voice called them from the other side of the room.
Umi was having the same nightmare again. She dreamt that she was trapped under piles of debris, unable to get away as her life was being sapped away slowly and torturously. Everything was dark and no matter how she wished and tried to scream for help, not a single sound escaped from her mouth. The air around her was choking and unbearable, making her unable to breathe.
There was nothing she could do at all but to helplessly wait for death.
When Umi woke up, she was covered in sweat, her heart racing wildly, her ears ringing from the nightmare.
Taking deep slow breaths, she tried to calm herself down as she placed her palm against her forehead.
An unpleasant feeling settled in the bluenete's stomach as she recalled her dream. Shaking her head violently, she tried to clear the scene off her head. She'd succeeded in doing so, only for her thoughts to drift back to what happened in the afternoon.
Kotori had confessed to her.
And she was still confused over her own feelings for Kotori and Honoka.
Umi resisted the urge to sigh – she seemed to be doing that a lot daily.
Her thoughts then went to the hot kiss that Kotori had forced upon her. Her face started to burn as she flushed brightly at the memory.
Kotori's lips were so soft and warm that she couldn't help but want to taste and feel it again.
She wondered what Honoka's lips would feel like.
Shaking that thought away from her mind, the blue haired girl closed her eyes in an attempt to block out any unnecessary thoughts.
When Kotori had left her after she broke down, Umi felt like the whole world was crashing onto her, as if everything was drained out of her. She knew that it wasn't Kotori's fault that she'd broken down in front of her. She knew that Kotori was also in pain due to the seemingly "unrequited love" she had for her. She also knew that there was nothing Kotori could do to alleviate her confusion.
But what could the blue haired girl do now? She didn't even know her own feelings anymore. She couldn't differentiate what's real and what's from the past.
Umi then knew that she needed advice from someone she could trust. But who?
Deep down, she already knew the answer to that. There was only one person in μ's that she knew would definitely give her sound advice or at least understood her predicament.
Probably.
In school
"Um…Nozomi, can I talk to you for a while?" Umi finally worked up the courage to ask the purple haired senior while the rest of μ's, save Honoka and Kotori, have not reached the clubroom yet. According to the purple haired senior, the three first years got held back by their homeroom teachers while the other two third years had classroom duties.
"Sure, Umi-chan. What's wrong?" the purple head asked, though she knew what Umi's going to talk about.
"How…do you differentiate between what's real and what's not? In other words, how do you know if something is real or if something is just an illusion?"
"Hmm…if you ask me, I'd say that something is real when you can feel it now. It doesn't have to be a physical thing per say. Is something wrong?"
"I…" Umi's voice stuck in her throat but took in a deep breath before continuing, "I'm a little…troubled."
"Honoka-chan and Kotori-chan huh?" Nozomi glanced at the said girls before turning to look at Umi again.
Umi nodded slightly.
Nozomi thought for a moment before she instructed the younger girl, "Close your eyes for 10 seconds."
Confused, the blue haired girl asked, "Whatever for…?"
"Just to confirm something," the purple haired senior grinned, "Then, void your mind of any thoughts. When I count to ten, tell me who appears in your mind the most."
"O-Okay…"
As instructed, Umi closed her eyes.
When Nozomi started the countdown, the bluenete's mind was filled with images. Past images of her time together with Honoka, and present images of her time with Kotori resurfaced into her mind almost all at once.
She saw her past self holding hands together with the past Honoka. She also saw her young self when she first met Kotori in elementary school, grinning beside Honoka, her hands outstretched invitingly.
Her time with Kotori and Honoka all came to her at once but only the image of the current Kotori stayed throughout the whole ten seconds.
"..3…2…1…" Nozomi stopped counting and Umi opened her eyes.
"So who do you see more in these 10 seconds?" Nozomi inquired.
"K…Kotori…"
"Isn't that your answer then?"
"B-But…" Umi though understood the logic of the little experiment now, still couldn't comprehend the fact that the one that she'd fallen in love with this time could be Kotori.
Does that mean the feelings I have for Honoka were but feelings from my past self who still yearns for Honoka?
Seeing the still confused look on Umi's face, Nozomi bit back a sigh. It wasn't her style to help someone directly – she usually stayed in the shadows to support them – but she realised that she had to do something to help the poor junior in front of her.
"Looks like I have to do something really drastic," Nozomi muttered inaudibly under her breath.
"Nozomi…?"
"Good luck, Umi-chan," the Vice-President of the Student Council said mysteriously before heading towards Kotori and Honoka who were talking to each other.
Umi wondered what the older girl was up to as she watched the shock reactions on both her childhood friends' faces. She…couldn't have told them about the experiment…right…?
Before she could step forward to question Nozomi's intentions, she froze mid step at the sight in front of her.
Honoka had one hand planted firmly against the wall, right above Kotori's head, the other hand, tilting the greyish haired girl's chin up.
What is she–
It was then the unthinkable happened.
Honoka kissed Kotori on the lips. And Kotori was receiving it.
She felt as if she was being shot by a gun.
Anger, jealousy, hurt, shock, confusion and other emotions came to her all at once, smothering her. She couldn't believe what she was seeing.
Why is Kotori kissing Honoka? I thought the ones she had feelings for was me? Damn it.
A raw anger – one she'd felt before when Kotori was being hit on by some men at the park – coursed through her whole body and she clenched her fists tightly.
She took in a shuddering breath to calm herself down but seeing how Honoka was kissing Kotori made her blood boil.
Kotori…Why..Why are you…
WhenKotori whimpered slightly as Honoka kissed her again, the bluenete's body moved. Before she could even process what she was doing, she violently pushed Honoka aside and glared coldly at her, "What are you trying to do, Honoka?"
Honoka visibly gulped in fear, cringing a little at Umi's glare.
"U-Umi-chan…" Kotori whispered softly. She'd seen this side of Umi before. When she was being cornered by the men in the park, Umi had saved her but the icy look on her face then sent a chill down her spin.
"What on earth are you doing to Kotori?" Umi's glare hardened.
Honoka then knew that she was in trouble. Deep trouble. Needless to say, she was deathly afraid of Umi when she's really really upset. Shifting her eyes over to the purple head who was standing near them in shock, the ginger haired girl implored the Student Council Vice-president with her eyes to save her.
"Umi-chan," Nozomi said softly, putting her hand on the bluenete's shoulders.
"What is it?" Umi snapped.
Nozomi almost flinched but forced Umi to turn around to look at her, "Look at me, Umi-chan. Calm down. It wasn't Honoka-chan's fault. It was mine. I told her to kiss Kotori."
"W-What…?"
Nozomi sighed, "I was trying to push you into realising your own feelings…and asked them for help. I just asked them to kiss on the lips, as normally as possible. Of course, both of them were against it at first, especially Kotori-chan but after I explained that this way, you'd be much clearer about your feelings and you'd be able to choose between the two of them. Well, now I understand why Kotori-chan refused just now…If it were me…I wouldn't want to get on your bad side as well…"
The hardened glare in Umi's eyes vanished, replaced by shock and surprise.
"I-I'm sorry…Umi-chan…" Honoka said sheepishly.
"Honoka…I…I should apologise as well. I'm sorry," the bluenete said apologetically, "Sorry…Kotori, for scaring you and…for snapping at you, Nozomi."
"It's fine," the purple haired senior smiled.
Kotori apologised in return, smiling slightly at Umi.
"So…" Nozomi trailed off slowly.
"Which one of us two…" Honoka started.
"Are you in love with?" Kotori finished the question.
"I…" Umi blushed as she looked at her two childhood friends.
By then, she already knew the answer.
"At first I thought I was in love with Honoka. I was often flustered around her…and the stunt she pulled in the library…well, let's just say that I couldn't forget it even if I wanted. I didn't know about my past life with Honoka then. But when I found out and my dreams started to become more vivid, I find myself drawn to her. Then…Kotori came in…and kissed me. That's when I started to get confused. I started to wonder if my love for Honoka was due to past life we shared. Sometimes…when I look at Honoka, I can almost see the 'past Honoka' morphing with the current Honoka…" Umi began softly, looking down.
She then looked up, smiling slightly, "I was very confused. That's why I didn't accept your feelings, Honoka." She turned to look into Honoka's eyes, "I'm sorry, Honoka. For making you wait so long for an answer."
"It's okay, Umi-chan…" Honoka smiled back, but a little sadly. Looking at Umi's smiling face, she knew that what her childhood friend's answer would be.
"Kotori…made me feel lots of things. My heart doesn't race when I'm with her…it's more like I'm very comfortable with her. But lately, I get flustered around her as well. I didn't know what was wrong until now. I was slowly falling for her. The jealously I felt and the same anger when the men in the park cornered her… I then realised how much Kotori meant to me. Looking at it objectively, both of you were k-kissing. But to me, it looked as if Honoka was trying to force Kotori and I didn't like that. I felt crushed when Kotori was kissing Honoka back…I thought my heart was going to stop." Umi breathed out as she now turned to Kotori.
"I love you, Kotori," Umi confessed, her face now bright red.
Kotori could only stare at her crush, shocked. Joy then overwhelmed her, as tears burned in her eyes, "U-Umi…chan…"
"I'm so sorry, Honoka. I…"
"Don't worry about it, Umi-chan," Honoka said gently, "Perhaps, somewhere in my mind, I'd already know you'll reject me. I mean, now that you mention it, I'm starting to wonder if the love I felt for you was due to what we shared in the past and not now."
Umi was about to say something but another voice interrupted her, "Um…am I supposed to be hearing…all these?"
Crap. Nozomi. All three of them thought at the same time.
"Just…pretend you didn't hear any of that…" Umi said pleadingly to the purple haired girl.
All three of them had forgotten that Nozomi was still there.
Umi was too caught up with her own feelings – and wanting to express them correctly – too realised that Nozomi wasn't supposed to hear all of that.
"I would if it was a normal confession but something Umi-chan said caught my interest," the purple haired senior said thoughtfully.
The three childhood friends looked at each other, with Umi shooting apologetic looks at the two.
"So…anyone here care to explain what Umi-chan meant by 'past life'?" Nozomi stared pointedly at the uneasy trio.
A/N: Now on to the next two problem on hand...telling the rest of μ's about the secret the three were hiding...as well as the question of why they retain their memories.